Comments on: Dünyayi kurtaran adam

Dünyayi kurtaran adam

thirteenkiller — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:24:15 -0800

Can't sleep, Turkish Star Wars will eat me [IMDb, previously]

By: interrobang

interrobang — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:32:31 -0800

Here's the entire movie on google video. The opening narration is so crazy I couldn't get past the first five minutes. Shots of star destroyers going backwards! Nuts! I couldn't find the iPod-friendly google video version, sorry.

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:35:22 -0800

That man is laying waste to Sid and Marty Krofft's entire army!

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:36:01 -0800

update: did that mummy's head just explode?

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:41:28 -0800

I gotta say, Turkey is one of the only countries I've ever been to where they are so obsessed with redoing everything in their own language. I rarely heard bad American music or saw bad American movies dubbed or subtitled when I was there... but I saw a lot of truly horrible stuff that they created themselves based on American entertainment. Horrible might actually be understating the badness.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:42:22 -0800

Nice "epilepsy" tag, btw.

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:43:43 -0800

"Raiders of the Lost Ark" music! Lots of somersaults! Recap; review; Wikipedia; web site for the sequel.

By: MrMoonPie

MrMoonPie — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:50:01 -0800

Turkish Jedi are so very bouncy!

By: everichon

everichon — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:50:47 -0800

Best worst ever. I love this movie.

By: rsclark

rsclark — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:51:27 -0800

The first few minutes I thought "crazy". After Luke threw the mummy head at the other mummy and it exploded, i thought "CRAAAAAZY!' ...and I was waiting for him to kiss the blond at the end.

By: redteam

redteam — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:54:01 -0800

Hey, what the hell? I just introduced several friends to these Turkish remakes yesterday! Weird. Here's what I sent out to them: Ok, well, here's as close as I could get to Turkish Titanic Turkish Star Wars: Though I think I made a mistake. The Death Star blowing up a whole bunch of times and backwards and then again was some other video that I'm desperately trying to remember. I kept this part on because I wanted to know if anyone could tell me what video that Death Star explosion sequence is from Turkish Batman (W ... T ... F?!): Turkish E.T. I first read about all this in Vice Magazine

By: QuestionableSwami

QuestionableSwami — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:15:30 -0800

Turkish Star Trek The production values really aren't that different from the original. Except for the trippy Pink Floyd soundtrack.

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:20:05 -0800

3 Dev Adam (Turkish Captain American and Santo vs. Evil Turkish Spiderman)

By: shift8

shift8 — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:26:52 -0800

Vice is also the first place i saw mention of it too

By: daq

daq — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:29:22 -0800

Not a good monday morning wake up. Not a good monday morning wake up at all.

By: tighttrousers

tighttrousers — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:31:18 -0800

Turkish Superman

By: gcbv

gcbv — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:39:14 -0800

Is there an actual Martial Arts move that involves pawing someone's face with giant workgloves until they eventually split into two equal halves vertically? The Turkish, they have secrets.

By: JHarris

JHarris — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:51:52 -0800

Do you remember an old Roadrunner cartoon where the Coyote's feet were strapped to a pair of rockets, sending him careening through a patch of cactus among other things, and every thing he hit made a different random sound effect, in rapid succession? The fight scenes sound exactly like that.

By: elpapacito

elpapacito — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:59:50 -0800

AHHHH I saw the worsters filmest everest ! There can't be any movie worse ! The picture of that crotch jumping asshole will haunt me ! *rofls, literally*

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:08:06 -0800

They started to resist with a crust which was welded with human brain and willpower. A coating which was formed by compressed human brain molecules was protecting the earth.

By: eatdonuts

eatdonuts — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:11:17 -0800

i watched this and thought: why are there holes in the costume over the jedi nipples? do turkist jedi knights need to be milked?

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:23:08 -0800

i watched this and thought: why are there holes in the costume over the jedi nipples? do turkist jedi knights need to be milked? Sharp eye. Let me just say your questions will be answered by the cut scenes included on the unrated director's cut DVD.

By: jake

jake — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:29:17 -0800

Oh, man. Unleashed the fury, here. I own four bootleg copies of Turkish Star Wars with varying levels of packaging, from a plain DVDR to an elaborate jewel case and silkscreened label. I'm not sure exactly why, but I'm obsessed with this film. I can recite almost all the dialogue in Turkish (I don't speak Turkish) and it's on my iPod, where I watch it most mornings on the way to work, enthusiastically explaining it to anyone unlucky enough to look over my shoulder. I may have watched it more times than almost anyone, but it makes me feel better about myself to imagine some guy out there keeps it on loop nonstop, compulsively. Probably the funniest part of the film (and the reason I was introduced to it in the first place) is the sound mixing - they apparently only had a single tape reel and had to splice sound effects and music at the same time - there are points where the Raiders theme is interrupted by an explosion (the same explosion sound used over 50 times) and then the music cuts back in abruptly. Also, in the Wizard's Lair fight scene, monster groans are interrupted by punching noises, so it's like rraarrrSMACKrrrrrrrrBIFFrraar. It's such that you can easily mimic the effect with your mouth - try it, it's fun! This fight scene has also become an in-joke amongst my friends - there is one red monster in the back who dances back and forth, side to side, without actually joining in the fray. It's hard to notice at first, until it's pointed out. We like to perform this dance move whenever possible. Thanks for linking to this, more people should be aware of Turkish sci-fi! (by the way, I also have copies of Turkish Superman and Star Trek - Superman is especially good. He's a total prick.)

By: jack_mo

jack_mo — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:34:53 -0800

I still think The Wizard of Oz is the nadir of incomprehensible Turkish remakery.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 11:50:17 -0800

The Brazilian Wizard of Oz seems a bit catchier though.

By: Drexen

Drexen — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:16:47 -0800

Here's my review of the first ten seconds. "What? What? What?? What? What!? ... what. What? What? What!?! What!?" Rinse and repeat for the rest of it.

By: squidfartz

squidfartz — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:33:02 -0800

What a great post. God, I love stuff like this.

By: Muddler

Muddler — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:33:17 -0800

Well, at least it is better than Episode 1...

By: kid ichorous

kid ichorous — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:39:35 -0800

"This is a game of death. Losers, when you die our master becomes happy."

By: furiousxgeorge

furiousxgeorge — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:51:30 -0800

This is the first internet video that has actually made me vomit...the room is kind of swaying back and forth a bit. I think I need to go take a nap.

By: the other side

the other side — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 13:19:32 -0800

What a badass. He was ~~chopping~~ punching those giant elmos in half!

By: OldReliable

OldReliable — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 13:27:02 -0800

Oh come on. Cüneyt Arkin has made hundreds of movies like this. He is like a Turkish Chuck Norris or perhaps Stephen Segal. He is popular, but he commands the same ammount of actual respect. Every movie involves him playing a Turk or perhaps Turkish ancestor battling against the foreign forces of evil out to destroy the great Turkish Nation(Ottoman Soldier against Arabs and Anatiolian Tribesman vs. Byzantines are favorites) He is always able to singlehandedly destroy the entire enemy garrison to save the girl. Oh, and you can ALWAYS find one on TV in the middle of the day if you are in the mood. Quite frankly, this is old and busted. I'm pretty sure this was made and released in the eighties. The new hotness of Turkish Nationalist propaganda is Valley of the Wolves, or Kurtlar Vadisi. It started out as a hit TV show, sort of like a Turkish Sopranos, about a secret police agent named Polat who gets surgery and goes undercover. His manager is killed, leaving him alone without any contact at the secret police, and in too deep to get out. Its pretty awesome. The upshot is after five seasons of this they made this movie where he goes to Iraq to avenge the capture of some Turkish soldiers there, and he goes toe to toe with none other than GARY FUCKING BUSEY!!!!!11!! who plays the American army captain who committed the affront to Turkish national honor. Polat of course rocks all of them. In actuality, the actor who plays Polat went to business school in Boston, and was about to fly back to start work in the US on September 11. He stayed in Turkey, and became the biggest star in Turkey. If only I were so lucky. But seriously, Kurtlar Vadisi Irak is the movie. Go get it.

By: MarshallPoe

MarshallPoe — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 13:39:44 -0800

I like this. Yes, I like it.

By: Iosephus

Iosephus — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 13:55:43 -0800

Good god, did ET defended himself with a venomous fart there? Also, I couldn't help it but find this version looks like a grown up Eraserhead "babycreature", so I'm creeped out though amused.

By: Joakim Ziegler

Joakim Ziegler — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 13:59:08 -0800

I was going to mention that I like this movie a lot, and the sound mixing, or lack thereof, but then jake showed me that I'm a mere amateur in liking this, and should probably just shut up and let the professionals handle things.

By: jake

jake — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 14:34:07 -0800

Yeah, you best step off, dude. Nobody can touch my TSW fandom. Okay, you can touch it. ...Gently....

By: jiawen

jiawen — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:07:32 -0800

Better watch out, evildoers, or you will be trampolined to death!

By: hoverboards don't work on water

hoverboards don't work on water — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:32:54 -0800

This is what the world will be like if the Creative Commons guys get their way.

By: snez

snez — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:35:45 -0800

Brazilian Star Wars

By: WhipSmart

WhipSmart — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:37:25 -0800

Metafilter: A coating which was formed by compressed human brain molecules

By: homodigitalis

homodigitalis — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:42:32 -0800

Pain! Pain! Pain!

By: ormondsacker

ormondsacker — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:50:19 -0800

Three years ago, I believe in "I Love Video" in Austin, I saw a single copy of this available for rental for a $200 deposit and the option to break your thumbs. And now here it is free on the webs. If anyone says this is not the greatest age of mankind, I will fight that man. With words.

By: zoogleplex

zoogleplex — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 15:59:13 -0800

It looks like whoever made this movie has never actually seen a movie, or even a TV show. Maybe they haven't even read a book, or a comic book. No sense of visual storytelling whatsoever. Very, very odd!

By: hippugeek

hippugeek — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 16:02:42 -0800

INCREDIBLE. I was gasping for breath just reading the review; I don't know if I can make it through the whole movie. You've made my week, thirteenkiller.

By: fidgets

fidgets — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 16:19:10 -0800

Does this movie make sense to Turkish people? Also, Brazilian Star Wars has a seriously funky soundtrack.

By: kenlayne

kenlayne — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 16:31:47 -0800

Oh jesus, Turkish Batman is fucking AWESOME. Make sure to watch it. SPOILER WARNING ALERT BE EXTRA CAREFUL: So just have Robin and Batman wear the same costumes, and then have a full-on rape scene, and then eventually Batman & Robin arrive (in a Lada?) and do lots of lame kicking and such -- oh, and capes must be removed simultaneously before the fighting -- and then Batman kills the rapist, with his hands, and then more lame fighting, and then ... well sure, Batman just pulls off his mask and gets busy with the gal who was being raped a moment ago.

By: dirigibleman

dirigibleman — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 18:03:53 -0800

That bouncy guy really doesn't like sports mascots.

By: tehloki

tehloki — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 00:54:36 -0800

DO NOT WANT

By: jason's_planet

jason's_planet — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 09:03:39 -0800

Oh jesus, Turkish Batman is fucking AWESOME. Make sure to watch it. Türkçe'de Duh-nuh nuh-nuh nuh-nuh nuh-nuh Duh-nuh nuh-nuh nuh-nuh nuh-nuh nasıl denir?

By: greasepig

greasepig — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 11:11:30 -0800

jake, I completely understand, respect, and admire what you do.