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I got to get my fix!
March 24, 2007 9:03 AM   Subscribe

One Pancake at a time. I don't think pancakes get much more ridiculous than this.
posted by blasdelf (57 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite

 
These are the pancakes you make as a treat for Mrs. Butterworth after she empties herself onto your plate.
posted by hermitosis at 9:06 AM on March 24, 2007


The breakfast of junkies?
posted by Balisong at 9:07 AM on March 24, 2007


Is this something I would need a syringe, a pocket mirror, a quail egg and a cigarette lighter to understand?
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 9:12 AM on March 24, 2007 [4 favorites]


Hehe, the crux of this braintease is the quail egg. Definitely the quail egg.

Now do you have to eat this in the alley, grungy toilet stall, or at the back of an near-empty light railcar?
posted by porpoise at 9:26 AM on March 24, 2007


Hey Crackhead!
posted by phaedon at 9:31 AM on March 24, 2007 [5 favorites]


Ok, that was funny. And a little sketchy.
posted by everichon at 9:39 AM on March 24, 2007


I loved both the junkie-pancakes and the crackhead post. I think Rat Poison would be a great idea for the sparkplugs.
posted by symbioid at 9:51 AM on March 24, 2007


Because they're so very tasty...
posted by Toekneesan at 9:52 AM on March 24, 2007


I don't think pancakes get much more ridiculous than this.

Better check with her.
posted by owhydididoit at 9:54 AM on March 24, 2007


mobius pancake
posted by phaedon at 10:01 AM on March 24, 2007 [1 favorite]


Of course, there's always the pankegg. Mmmm, pankeggs. I'm going to go fix one now.
posted by MsMolly at 10:02 AM on March 24, 2007 [2 favorites]


Chilly pancakes
posted by taosbat at 10:19 AM on March 24, 2007


All this needs is a tiny bunny.
posted by konolia at 10:25 AM on March 24, 2007 [2 favorites]


Pretty cool, but I was hoping that the pankake mix was going to be injected directly into the egg. Imagine! Instant pancake, just break the shell!
posted by lekvar at 10:33 AM on March 24, 2007 [1 favorite]


Normaly I don't like pancakes, but this site made me want pancakes. Real bad.
posted by Wonderwoman at 10:34 AM on March 24, 2007 [3 favorites]


I'm.. um.. I guess I'd like a little context. The lego cigarette is cute too.

I need a Wikipedia page for the cyrillic street names of controlled substances...
posted by abulafa at 10:40 AM on March 24, 2007


I have no desire to see how this person makes maple syrup.
posted by brundlefly at 10:57 AM on March 24, 2007


Love it. And the best part is, they would almost certainly be allowable under the Heaven's Gate pancake-circumference requirements.
posted by scratch at 11:31 AM on March 24, 2007


Now all they need is a little miniature Oolong..
posted by caddis at 11:51 AM on March 24, 2007 [1 favorite]


So you hear bells ringing when you eat this thing?
posted by The Straightener at 12:40 PM on March 24, 2007


It's the perfect meal for heroin addicts. 1.) they aren't going to be that hungry to begin with, and 2.) for the most part it's constructed with tools already at their disposal.

And in the event they get picked up by the cops, they can demonstrate that it isn't drug paraphernalia, it's cooking accessories.

Brilliant.
posted by quin at 12:44 PM on March 24, 2007


See also (provided you're a Family Guy fan); this is a continuation of a longer-running joke.
posted by humblepigeon at 12:50 PM on March 24, 2007


Krusteaz pancake mix + appropriate amount of decent malty dark beer = yummy beer pancakes. Add real butter and whatever else you like on top. Go back to bed on a lazy Sunday. Save the kit and the smack for another occasion.
posted by elendil71 at 12:55 PM on March 24, 2007


What? No one watches Deadwood anymore?
posted by Alex404 at 1:14 PM on March 24, 2007 [1 favorite]


also there (on top), cat wash & dog broom
posted by growabrain at 1:17 PM on March 24, 2007


Hellboy loves pancakes
posted by coiled at 1:59 PM on March 24, 2007


I don't care what anyone says, back when people posted whatever was spuriously related to pancakes to the blue, those were the good old days.
posted by Kattullus at 2:13 PM on March 24, 2007


Who here likes pancakes?
posted by killdevil at 2:20 PM on March 24, 2007


this is... oh wow. just amazing.
posted by shmegegge at 2:30 PM on March 24, 2007


Who here likes pancakes?

I do! I do!

Pankeggs remind me of jianbing. Mmm, jianbing. (Note, the egg's already been cracked as the video starts. You do get to see the lady doing some egg troweling though.)
posted by endermunkee at 2:31 PM on March 24, 2007


coiled, that link is awesome.
posted by lekvar at 2:49 PM on March 24, 2007


I want to see him make an omelet to go with my pancakes. And maybe some bacon too.
posted by inconsequentialist at 3:21 PM on March 24, 2007


"YOU ARE A CRACKHEAD. WHY DON'T YOU OWN A CRACKPIPE?"

Not that I should know, but while ownership or possession of a crackpipe is not quite illegal in most parts of the world, if one were found having one, it'd be rather difficult to explain it without admitting that you do in fact smoke crack.

"Uhm. Oh this? Heh. It's a friend's crackpipe. He asked me to hold it for him. Actually, it's not even a crack pipe. It's like a something-other-than-crack pipe. I don't even know why I said that."

Granted, some people wouldn't give a shit and would tape their monogrammed crackpipe to their forehead with big arrows pointing to it. Others would be seeking slightly more inconspicuous choices, like not owning a crackpipe. Yet then the urge would come upon them like a werewolf on a full moon, and they'd have to smoke that crack but how could they when all they have within reach is someone else's motorcycle?

The man's plight is elementary. If you see a girlfriend who lives in a neighborhood of crackheads, you're gonna have to carry a bag of sparkplugs with you. This is the 21st century. I don't see what the guy's problem is.

Frankly I'm surprised your casual run-of-the-mill crackhead, who is in the process of destroying their brain with chemicals meant to be outside the skull, would be able to put crackpipe and sparkplug together in their head and add up the possibilities.

...

But I don't do crack. So as usual, I have no idea what I'm talking about.

...

As for pancakes, I used to be more of a waffle guy myself cuz if you stack them there's more space for the jelly and PB and butter and syrup in the little indentations in waffles than there is in pancakes. However, recently I've begun to realize I have a problem and may require intervention. Cuz when the lady at the drive-thru accidently gives me a bacon egg and cheese biscuit instead, I can get pretty damn ballistic on her ass.
posted by ZachsMind at 3:23 PM on March 24, 2007


Who here likes pancakes? I love pancakes.
posted by Rhomboid at 3:48 PM on March 24, 2007


Pancakes are my crack.
posted by miss lynnster at 3:50 PM on March 24, 2007


miss lynnster that remark struck me as funny on, well, more than one level.
posted by Cedric at 4:18 PM on March 24, 2007


As I knew it would.
posted by miss lynnster at 4:38 PM on March 24, 2007


I think I have a non-sexual-internet-crush on miss lynnster.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 5:04 PM on March 24, 2007


Requiem for a breakfast?
posted by Afroblanco at 5:35 PM on March 24, 2007


I think I have a non-sexual-internet-crush on miss lynnster.

Where did you find this non-sexual internet?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:05 PM on March 24, 2007


I hope everyone realizes, though, that this FPP was posted simply to fulfill the longing expressed by this MeFier.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:10 PM on March 24, 2007


Thanks dnab. :)

Fret not fam, I've no doubt that his internet is just as sexual as yours. Just minus the boobs is all.
posted by miss lynnster at 7:31 PM on March 24, 2007


As the Beatles (would have) said:

I need a fix 'cause I'm chowing down....
posted by Benny Andajetz at 7:38 PM on March 24, 2007


I used to work at a place that made what they called Swedish pancakes. They were actually kind of crepe-like, though we wouldn't roll them up with stuff in them. They were tiny. Not Heroin-pancake tiny, but maybe 3 inches in diameter, and thin. We'd pour one tablespoon of batter out on the grill, then use this quick swirling motion with the back of the spoon to make them three inches or so wide. You had to make a whole bunch real fast, because a half-stack was like 12 of the things, and sometimes customers would order two half-stacks with their basted eggs, medium. It was a hectic kitchen to work in, and I actually got my job there (5-star joint, mind you) BECAUSE I'd been working at McDonald's, and the owner assumed that if I could have kept up there, I must be fast, and he wanted fast. Because he needed someone who could make the hell out of those little swedish pancakes. It sure was gratifying to walk into McDonald's and announce in a loud voice that I was quitting because I'd gotten a job as the pancake guy at CHALET Ć’UZANNE, MOTHERFUCKERS I'M OUTTA HERE. They served them with Lingonberries. How pretentious is that shit? But hey, they were damn good, and I made a metric fuckton of those little things until I came to my senses one day, and moved back to Austin.

I wonder if that nutty comet cult would have liked them?
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:03 PM on March 24, 2007


"until I came to my senses one day, and moved back to Austin..

I've been to Austin. I don't think you've come to your senses yet if you're still there. Don't take it too rough though. I'm still in Dallas. I don't think we come to our senses until some time after we leave Texas.
posted by ZachsMind at 9:07 PM on March 24, 2007


We've got Gingerbread pancakes at THREE different 24-hour restaurants here. You'll prize me away with a backhoe, buster.
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:17 PM on March 24, 2007


You have 24-hour restaurants with gingerbread pancakes?
Lordy, I hate living in San Mateo...
posted by miss lynnster at 9:20 PM on March 24, 2007


I don't think we come to our senses until some time after we leave Texas.

The president leaves Texas with some frequency (I'm told) to attend to his job in Washington DC, but he hasn't come to his senses. Maybe he comes back to Texas too soon?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:25 PM on March 24, 2007


Mmmmm...Gingerbread Pancakes! I never dreamed it 'til now!
posted by taosbat at 9:25 PM on March 24, 2007


OMG!
posted by taosbat at 9:27 PM on March 24, 2007


There's one all-important question though, that has yet to be asked: How tall a stack can be made from these nickel-sized cakes? Aha!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 10:04 PM on March 24, 2007


IHOP (or an equivalent pancake restaurant) should totally market something like this... They could have the pancake chefs make them for you at your table (kind of like pancake hibachi).
posted by amyms at 10:55 PM on March 24, 2007


f@m, in the interests of Science!, I took a whole bunch of heroin, then I smoked a lot of crack, then I spun around till I got really dizzy.

I grabbed my spoon and lighter and quickly made up some pancakes and I got five high. (roughly an inch or so...)

I'd like to say that I could beat the record, but damn. Mine were tiny and didn't stack well, and the evil monkey was hitting me over the head the whole time.

And then the flies tried to rape me, but I hid in a smallish cabinet. Eventually they went away.

But I gots to say; Stacking pancakes is not for the foolhardy or the weak of heart.

I certainly won't make that same mistake again.
posted by quin at 11:38 PM on March 24, 2007


The thing to mainline, with or without fluffy, delectable pancakes drenched in real maple syrup and melted butter, is Nutella. Now you got me jonesing for waffles and gaufrettes too. Dang.
posted by nickyskye at 12:51 AM on March 25, 2007


We killed it:( Does anyone have a mirror?
posted by pantsrobot at 11:44 AM on March 26, 2007


I'm sorry... but it's just funny to be asking for a mirror. To see someone using syringes to cook pancakes in a spoon over a lighter.
posted by miss lynnster at 12:46 PM on March 26, 2007


Too late to the pancake party.
posted by typewriter at 6:39 PM on March 26, 2007


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