Everyone featured on this site requires a fucken glassing.
May 8, 2007 3:06 PM   Subscribe

 
Yuck.
posted by Malor at 3:10 PM on May 8, 2007


When I think of the word glass used as a verb I think of what too many knuckle draggers want to do the Middle East (but only if you can pump oil through a glass crust).
posted by caddis at 3:14 PM on May 8, 2007


I prefer the gasface.
posted by kosem at 3:16 PM on May 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


Who needs to be glassed?

fuckface
Bruce Banner
Boonga
rick
Dylan
Jason
posted by mr_crash_davis at 3:24 PM on May 8, 2007


I will agree that saved search terms do, in fact, require a glassing.
posted by notmydesk at 3:24 PM on May 8, 2007


MetaFilter: Everyone featured on this site requires a fucken glassing.
posted by Eideteker at 3:27 PM on May 8, 2007 [2 favorites]


Gas face
posted by Eideteker at 3:29 PM on May 8, 2007


Not a very good post.
posted by washburn at 3:29 PM on May 8, 2007


The obtuseness saved me from the hate. (I don't get it.)
posted by flotson at 3:37 PM on May 8, 2007


Glass this post.
posted by dontoine at 3:38 PM on May 8, 2007


my worthless me-too comment requires a glassing.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 3:39 PM on May 8, 2007


It's not that bad a post...I learned what "glassing" is, so it wasn't a complete waste of my time.

The Blogspot page is pretty crap, though.
posted by infinitywaltz at 3:39 PM on May 8, 2007


How is either link representative of the best of the web?
posted by batmonkey at 3:42 PM on May 8, 2007


did anyone else find it interesting that they've been at it since june '05?
posted by mcsweetie at 3:42 PM on May 8, 2007


When I think of the word glass used as a verb I think of what too many knuckle draggers want to do the Middle East

I thought of surfboards.
/SoCal native
posted by LionIndex at 3:47 PM on May 8, 2007


Because I am bereft of effective snark, I should like to add that "glassed" also means to have looked at something through binoculars or a spotting scope.
posted by Tube at 3:47 PM on May 8, 2007


I like it.
posted by docpops at 3:48 PM on May 8, 2007


Just mention Begby and it'll bring a smile to your day.
posted by docpops at 3:49 PM on May 8, 2007


Wow, glassing means exactly what I would have guessed. Good old pint glasses.
posted by smackfu at 3:50 PM on May 8, 2007


I clicked the first link, chuckled away for a good ten minutes going "yeah......yeah........christ yeah.......him too....hehehe", and now I come in here and find all the hate. Dammit, why does everyone have to always be so sensible, rational, and totally not filled with hatred-of-humanity? Pshaw!
posted by hydatius at 3:56 PM on May 8, 2007


Tuesday, May 01, 2007
People who put all their eggs in one basket

assholes.


Too fucking right.
posted by quin at 4:00 PM on May 8, 2007


I have a friend whose surname is Stonehouse. Shouldn't she have a say in this?
posted by rob511 at 4:07 PM on May 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


Me too LionIndex. Not that I surf.
posted by miss lynnster at 4:08 PM on May 8, 2007


I always thought glassing involved breaking the glass with the person's face, not breaking the glass in advance.
posted by Bugbread at 4:13 PM on May 8, 2007


You know who he's missing?

<IMG>
posted by Eideteker at 4:15 PM on May 8, 2007


They'd fare better with an Ira Glassing.
posted by ...possums at 4:16 PM on May 8, 2007


Me too LionIndex. Not that I surf.

Me neither. Is your name Charlie too?!??!!!??
posted by LionIndex at 4:17 PM on May 8, 2007


Aw, I got a huge chuckle out of my appearance on that site.
posted by adamgreenfield at 4:21 PM on May 8, 2007


this actually came up today!
When listening to the radio, the only folks i really want to glass are Evanescence and Linkin Park...
everyone else can stay.
even paris hilton....
posted by es_de_bah at 4:29 PM on May 8, 2007


Man, people really don't like this blog. Huh.
posted by cortex at 4:32 PM on May 8, 2007


This is an oldie but goodie.

NAE CUNT LEAVES HERE TIL AH FIND OUT WHIT CUNT DID IT
posted by fire&wings at 4:39 PM on May 8, 2007


from the wikipedia link:
Glassing carries a penalty of up to six months imprisonment.

WTF? You attack someone in such a way that Heavy blood loss usually ensues, and often results in life long scarring of the face, or even loss of vision and the most you can get is 6 months?
posted by juv3nal at 4:40 PM on May 8, 2007


I FARTED!
posted by joelf at 4:43 PM on May 8, 2007


I am not a cannibal; I do not want anything to do with your precious children. If you have some canned food to spare that would be great but I'm not going to rob you for it.
posted by nervousfritz at 4:47 PM on May 8, 2007


When I think of "glassed" I think of Eggs, Danny Thomas-Style.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 4:59 PM on May 8, 2007


This sum weak shit, bruh...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:00 PM on May 8, 2007


juv3nal writes 'from the wikipedia link:
'
Glassing carries a penalty of up to six months imprisonment.

That Wikipedia article was just pure bollocks. There's no such offence as 'glassing'. You'd be charged with Grievious Bodily Harm, which carries a maximum sentence of five years imprisonment and an unlimited fine.

Also, it wasn't popularized by Trainspotting. Trainspotting was simply an example of art reflecting life in certain working class mileux.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 5:09 PM on May 8, 2007


I always thought glassing involved breaking the glass with the person's face, not breaking the glass in advance.

I think the worst sound I've ever heard was the repeated thud as one bloke in a fight tried to smash a beer bottle on another bloke's face - after a while one of the attacker's mates took the bottle off him, smashed it on the pavement and did the glassing correctly. Which, come to think of it, is one of the worst sights I've ever seen.

It's enough of a problem in Scotland that a ban on glass glasses in pubs is (or was?) under consideration.
posted by jack_mo at 5:11 PM on May 8, 2007


I worked as a barman in a pub as a youth, and saw a couple of glassings. Nobody needs that. It does, as bugbread says, involve breaking your pint glass in the man's face.
Later, we got a type of pint sleeve that shatters like a car windshield, just to prevent this.
posted by Abiezer at 5:13 PM on May 8, 2007


jack - then wouldn't that be a bottling? The vocabulary had the distinction as I recall, though both obviously a cunt's game.
posted by Abiezer at 5:15 PM on May 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


juv3nal writes "WTF? You attack someone in such a way that Heavy blood loss usually ensues, and often results in life long scarring of the face, or even loss of vision and the most you can get is 6 months?"

I'm guessing that the glassing charge itself carries that penalty, and then whatever other legal penalties also accrue. Just a guess, though.
posted by Bugbread at 5:20 PM on May 8, 2007


Ah, never mind.
posted by Bugbread at 5:21 PM on May 8, 2007


MetaFilter: Man, people really don't like this blog. Huh.
posted by Eideteker at 5:21 PM on May 8, 2007


WHO THE FECK ARE YOU?
posted by grytpype at 5:25 PM on May 8, 2007


I fear nowt.

/Glasses self with a plastic cup, Johnny Vegas style
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 5:33 PM on May 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


The thing that saved the link was the presence of Ozzie cricket team - Worst World Cup, EVAR.
posted by Samuel Farrow at 5:40 PM on May 8, 2007


Also they are the bowls team - but my point still stands.
posted by Samuel Farrow at 5:48 PM on May 8, 2007


I should like to add that "glassed" also means to have looked at something through binoculars or a spotting scope.

That is excellent.

Glasgow kiss, anyone?
posted by dreamsign at 6:04 PM on May 8, 2007


And people who put all their glass in one basket should be egged.
posted by wendell at 6:21 PM on May 8, 2007


Or as Bob Dylan would put it (if you could understand what he was singing):

They'll glass you while you're driving in your car.
They'll glass you while you're playing your guitar,

They'll glass you while you're walking with your dog,
They'll glass you while you're writing in your blog.

I would not feel so half-assed.
Everybody must get glassed.

posted by wendell at 6:25 PM on May 8, 2007


Ek glassy, do glassy, teen glassy, char --
Put your hands in the air like you just don't care, 'cause you feel like a superstar
Ek glassy, do glassy, teen glassy, char
You're drunk as hell, and you don't feel well, but you still go back to the bar...
posted by Methylviolet at 6:40 PM on May 8, 2007


I like the tapir massage!
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 6:58 PM on May 8, 2007


An acquaintance of mine once told me the story of the worst night in his entire adolescent career. He was an unpopular, gangly, sensitive kid, and he hoped that throwing a rager while his parents were out of town would help him to make friends. It worked for a while - everybody came. The party got out of hand fast, though, and the neighbors threatened to call the cops if things didn't quiet down. Dude. His parents would *kill* him! So he told everyone to go home. No one did. The party got louder, and the kids got drunker.

A fight broke out on the front lawn, and the poor kid lost it. He grabbed a beer bottle and slammed it against the curb with all his anemic might to create a weapon he could brandish against the brawlers. It didn't break the first time, or the second, or the third. On the fourth try, he ran up to his room in tears and closed the door.

The party was eventually broken up, he got grounded forevermore and no one ever let him forget it. Even as he walked the aisle to collect his diploma, he could hear kids whispering, "Plink! Plink! Plink!" behind him.

Glassing is serious business, folks. The face you lose might be your own.
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 7:00 PM on May 8, 2007 [3 favorites]


Yeah glassing really isn't pretty...
posted by ob at 7:09 PM on May 8, 2007


I should like to add that "glassed" also means to have looked at something through binoculars or a spotting scope.

i'd like to add that i actually glass things at work, although loss of blood and face scarring is not involved ... (a glass template and a magnifying glass marked in thousandths to verify the dies are cutting accurately are involved)
posted by pyramid termite at 9:06 PM on May 8, 2007


IF IT TAINT SCOTTISH, TIS CRAAP
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:18 PM on May 8, 2007




flapjax, have you been to GR?
posted by caddis at 11:56 PM on May 8, 2007


caddis, uh... what's GR? I googled it, but I'm still at a loss.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 12:30 AM on May 9, 2007


freshwater_pr0n - I read that Annie Lennox' kid threw a very similar party recently only a bunch of myspace kids showed up and trashed the mansion. Oops.
posted by chuckdarwin at 12:37 AM on May 9, 2007


Dag. At least my boy got to get the hell out of his small town and grow up to be a somewhat of a rockstar in his own right. Maybe kids these days really do have it worse.
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 12:48 AM on May 9, 2007


I always thought glassing involved breaking the glass with the person's face, not breaking the glass in advance.

I think, if broken glass has just shredded your face, you can stake a claim to having been glassed whether the glass was broken in the correct way or whether it was done by some freestyling amateur.
posted by vbfg at 6:10 AM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


gr is grand rapids
posted by pyramid termite at 7:02 AM on May 9, 2007


Grand Rapids, MI has a huge Dutch population and for years, although less now, the phrase "If you ain't Dutch you ain't much" was heard around town and was also probably true if you were runnig for office or sought other positions of importance in the town.
posted by caddis at 8:32 AM on May 9, 2007


hazel o'connor breaking glass , nick lowe .i love the sound of breaking glass ,
posted by baker dave at 10:07 AM on May 9, 2007


I think, if broken glass has just shredded your face, you can stake a claim to having been glassed whether the glass was broken in the correct way or whether it was done by some freestyling amateur.

No, the distinction, I think, is important here. For example, having someone grab the back of your head and pound your face into your pint glass is apt to cause glass-related injury, but does that really qualify as an authentic "glassing?" What if some object other than a pint glass was used? I mean, the ever-popular "smash the beer bottle and poke the bastard with the sharp end" maneuver is also quite popular, but is that also "glassing" per se?

There is also the "sucker punch" aspect to "glassing." From my understanding, being "glassed" is typically a first blow, predicated by breaking the glass - not a self-defense move, but a highly aggressive escalation, typically a first strike on the part of the "glasser." Without that "sucker punch" aspect, you just sustained facial injuries brought on during a bar fight and, as such, are participatory in nature. With it, you could very well be an innocent bystander or a victim of a drunk psychotic, and therefore able to truly stake a claim to being "glassed."

But, then again, I'm bored and trying to get into an analytical mood for a project on which I'm working, so this could all be just a waste of bandwidth.
posted by FormlessOne at 1:12 PM on May 10, 2007


So, caddis, no, I've never been to Grand Rapids. I actually first heard the "ain't Dutch ain't much" bit on a visit to Amsterdam, where an English friend used it. And he was referring to the use of the phrase by Dutch folk in Holland: I doubt he'd been to GR either.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:35 PM on May 10, 2007


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