Stamp and Approved
May 9, 2007 12:29 PM   Subscribe

THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE OF AMERICA warning: sound, animated gifs, frontpage-1.0-ish
posted by Stynxno (65 comments total) 8 users marked this as a favorite
 
Clearly, the best of the web here. MeFi continues to impress.
posted by dead_ at 12:32 PM on May 9, 2007


I thought Free Republic was the official website of America.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 12:34 PM on May 9, 2007


Well, it is what you said it would be. So, there.
posted by ninjew at 12:36 PM on May 9, 2007


.
posted by Mister_A at 12:38 PM on May 9, 2007


Belongs in the still open thread
posted by DU at 12:40 PM on May 9, 2007


Stynxno=complience?
posted by Dizzy at 12:41 PM on May 9, 2007


I always had a feeling that if America had a website it would be registered through GoDaddy.
posted by hypocritical ross at 12:42 PM on May 9, 2007


FUCK YEAH.
posted by Demogorgon at 12:43 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


You keep using that song. I do not think it means what you think it means.
posted by hydatius at 12:44 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


No dancing Jesus???
posted by LordSludge at 12:47 PM on May 9, 2007


Nothing like a MIDI to pump up my national pride.
posted by coolhappysteve at 12:51 PM on May 9, 2007


Additional plugins are required to display all the media on this page.

Thank you Ubuntu
posted by acro at 12:52 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


Well, that's pretty much what I expected.
posted by brain_drain at 12:55 PM on May 9, 2007


andrew jackson is the 10th best thing about the U.S.??
posted by spicynuts at 1:02 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


"George Washington" beats "Hamburger"?

Oh HELL no.
posted by Greg Nog at 1:03 PM on May 9, 2007


warning: sound, animated gifs, frontpage-1.0-ish

I don't understand. Why do these things require a warning?
posted by shmegegge at 1:04 PM on May 9, 2007


I'm just here for the reasons for deletion.
posted by Pastabagel at 1:06 PM on May 9, 2007


Wow, that's horrible!
posted by chillmost at 1:12 PM on May 9, 2007


I didn't think it survived the dot-com crash.
posted by dhartung at 1:13 PM on May 9, 2007


Web 9/11
posted by Demogorgon at 1:14 PM on May 9, 2007


stinky!

Great post! +1
posted by dios at 1:17 PM on May 9, 2007


Reason #8: Big gaping hole in the ground.
posted by adamms222 at 1:18 PM on May 9, 2007


I had no idea you could "reverse" the direction of a marquee. Dammit, why didn't I know that back in 1995?! My personal homepage would've looked even more spiffy!

Still, officialwebsiteofamerica.com could've used a "under construction" gif, methinks.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 1:22 PM on May 9, 2007


Also totally awesome! Yeah! We stand as one! Whooo!
posted by chillmost at 1:31 PM on May 9, 2007


THIS SONG IS AWESOME.
posted by Milkman Dan at 1:31 PM on May 9, 2007


I don't understand. Why do these things require a warning?

In my case, something in that vile brew crashed my computer. Not just IE (at work, no choice), but the whole damn thing.
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 1:33 PM on May 9, 2007


official website of epilepsy is more like it
posted by dopamine at 1:34 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


chillmost, the creapiest thing about that is how the video keeps going long after the music (thankfully) ends.
posted by acro at 1:35 PM on May 9, 2007


more patriotism
posted by mattbucher at 1:42 PM on May 9, 2007


Shit sandwich.
posted by NationalKato at 1:42 PM on May 9, 2007


Since Firefox thankfully doesn't do background MIDIs on my box, I'm gonna have to assume the missing music is "America, FUCK YEAH!"
posted by arto at 1:44 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


Freedom? Liberty? Justice? As an American, I know none of these things... Maybe these are all relative...

Oh, and Thanks alot. That resized my browser to a larger-than-it-needs-to-be homo-erotic USA Lover exposing himself to our fine leaders on a rock in North Dakota.
posted by subaruwrx at 1:48 PM on May 9, 2007


I think Central and South America are under-represented on that page. I won't mention Canada.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 1:51 PM on May 9, 2007


Also totally awesome! Yeah! We stand as one! Whooo!

Am I the only one who read that URL as "America West and a sone"?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:51 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


this is an all html website, isn't it ?
posted by sgt.serenity at 1:53 PM on May 9, 2007


more patriotism

Let's see.. The NASCAR dude crashed and died, the Challenger blew up, the WTS got brought down by the planes and the wrestler just got old and irrelevant. Who's the dog? Lassie? Is it still alive?
That pretty much leaves the cartoon character, the bird and the flag.
America - when shit goes wrong!
posted by c13 at 1:54 PM on May 9, 2007


I'm gonna have to assume the missing music is "America, FUCK YEAH!"
posted by arto at 1:44 PM on May 9

Actually it's a terrible MIDI version of Born in the USA.
posted by Demogorgon at 2:06 PM on May 9, 2007


Picard.

Morrissey.

Feel it as it consumes you
posted by four panels at 2:37 PM on May 9, 2007


I'm just here for the reasons for deletion.

LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT
posted by eddydamascene at 2:58 PM on May 9, 2007


America hurts my eyes.
posted by flotson at 2:58 PM on May 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


Yep, I came to America for hamburger and Andrew Jackson.
posted by hojoki at 3:06 PM on May 9, 2007


Yep. The first things my ancestors did after they arrived was order hamburgers and discuss the greatness of Andrew Jackson.
posted by fandango_matt at 3:58 PM on May 9, 2007


I recognize George Washington, but the other gentleman isn't Abe Lincoln or Andrew Jackson. Maybe he's "friendly people."
posted by kirkaracha at 4:22 PM on May 9, 2007


Mefites are asking, why do they hate us? They hate what we see right here in this thread -- democratically elected membership. Their leaders are self-appointed....they hate our freedoms website. They hate our freedoms -- our freedom of spinny gifs, our freedom of delightful midi, our freedom to bitch on MeTalk and assemble and disagree with each other, then we ban you.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 4:49 PM on May 9, 2007


Why no blinky text?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 5:24 PM on May 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


Reminds me of this beauty.
posted by rancidchickn at 5:34 PM on May 9, 2007


is this patriotism i feel welling up in my heart, or just gas?
posted by es_de_bah at 5:49 PM on May 9, 2007


Am I the only one who read that URL as "America West and a sone"?

No, you are not.
posted by trip and a half at 5:50 PM on May 9, 2007


Although I probably am the only one who took like three whole minutes trying to figure out WTF it could possiblly mean before clicking through and feeling like an idiot.
posted by trip and a half at 5:55 PM on May 9, 2007


I just kept wondering what a sone was. Was it a stone minus t? Was it like a song but different, or more about airlines?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:56 PM on May 9, 2007


I see your "Fuck yeah!" and raise you a "Holy shit!"
posted by breezeway at 7:00 PM on May 9, 2007


Well, a sone is a "unit of perceived loudness", and the only possibility I could come up with was that it linked to a site that somehow claimed that the western states were a bit louder in their patriotism than the rest of the country. That's when I clicked, and my self-esteem was reduced to zero. I now stand a lone.
posted by trip and a half at 7:38 PM on May 9, 2007


ASCII BUSH WELCOMES YOU TO AMERICA MOTHERFUCKERS!
posted by wfrgms at 9:09 PM on May 9, 2007


the only possibility I could come up with was that it linked to a site that somehow claimed that the western states were a bit louder in their patriotism than the rest of the country

See, I would have put that knowledge together with America West and determined that someone was complaining that America Wests's aircraft were insufficiently soundproofed.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:38 PM on May 9, 2007


Your analysis arguably makes more sense than mine, if indeed nonsense can make more sense than other nonsense. (I was working without a net, so to speak, unware that "America West" is (was?) the name of an actual airline.)
posted by trip and a half at 10:17 PM on May 9, 2007


Er, unaware. I'm going to bed now, and trying to forget this post ever happened.
posted by trip and a half at 10:20 PM on May 9, 2007


Strangely refreshing.

This post MADE IN AMERICA
posted by parallax7d at 11:17 PM on May 9, 2007


yechhh....that's appalling.
posted by winks007 at 6:29 AM on May 10, 2007


What? No crying eagle?
posted by smallerdemon at 6:39 AM on May 10, 2007



Note to self: read the small print that warns of loud music when page loads.


(When Quicktime wants to be updated, and the page loads there is an awkward delay in getting access to the volume control) *blush*
posted by fluffycreature at 7:07 AM on May 10, 2007


HEY!

KEEP IT DOWN OVER THERE!!
posted by LordSludge at 7:54 AM on May 10, 2007


Come on, don't make fun of it! It is obviously W's first attempt at a website; remember that you, too, were all once beginners at something.

Heckuva job, Bushie!
posted by contessa at 10:11 AM on May 10, 2007


I used to think WhiteHouse.com was the official US web site. It was very confusing.
posted by punishinglemur at 12:57 PM on May 10, 2007


Hey whoa, whoa, whoa. Europe doesn't even have an official website. Suck it, haters.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 4:03 PM on May 10, 2007


Why does the loading screen at http://americawestandasone.com/awsao.html have a satellite image of Katrina hiting New Orleans?
posted by feloniousmonk at 4:57 PM on May 10, 2007


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