And I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran. I ran all night and day. I couldn't get away.
May 17, 2007 6:00 AM   Subscribe

Crazed runner keeps a ceremonial trophy.
posted by Blazecock Pileon (57 comments total)
 
ew
posted by Dave Faris at 6:07 AM on May 17, 2007


If you're nervous about how you're doing in the race, it gives you something to chew.
posted by hermitosis at 6:09 AM on May 17, 2007


Certainly gives a new meaning to "click to see thumbnails"
posted by TedW at 6:09 AM on May 17, 2007 [12 favorites]


He is just asking for Athlete's Neck.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 6:14 AM on May 17, 2007 [3 favorites]


The picture in that second link just dredged up last night's dinner from deepest depths of my colon and brought it right back to the top of my throat.
posted by The Straightener at 6:14 AM on May 17, 2007


So does he only collect runners' toenails, or anyone's? Because I wish I had known about this a couple of years ago; I had a great one to send him. (Seriously stubbed toe, nail fell off a couple months later.)
posted by Faint of Butt at 6:19 AM on May 17, 2007


Revolting, yet strangely attractive. If I didn't know what they were, I might think it was abalone.
posted by scratch at 6:19 AM on May 17, 2007


I haven't even had breakfast yet this morning. Kinda disgusting!
posted by winks007 at 6:28 AM on May 17, 2007


I was gonna get her some pearls, but then I thought, this is so much more personal.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 6:29 AM on May 17, 2007


This image popped into my mind...would you like a bite?
posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 6:30 AM on May 17, 2007


TedW FTW!
posted by HyperBlue at 6:31 AM on May 17, 2007


I have a necklace just like that! Except made from ears.
posted by Astro Zombie at 6:41 AM on May 17, 2007 [2 favorites]


I'm sure you can find "rip off" copys on Ebay.
posted by Balisong at 6:46 AM on May 17, 2007


ACK! NO!

NO NO NO NO NO!

>hurl<
posted by Turtles all the way down at 6:46 AM on May 17, 2007


AHGGHGHHHHHH!!!!
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 6:51 AM on May 17, 2007


I cannot bring myself to look directly at that photo.

>shudder<
posted by waltzing astronomers at 6:51 AM on May 17, 2007


oh, how i wish i could unsee that photo....
posted by the painkiller at 7:34 AM on May 17, 2007


Can we warn people when the links we post are likely to make them physically ill? Please?
posted by Gable Oak at 7:36 AM on May 17, 2007


Physically ill? Toenails?
posted by chundo at 7:51 AM on May 17, 2007


Yeah, chundo, I'm not getting the disgusting factor here either. Believe me, I've seen things on this old Internet that I wish I could wash out of my brain, but a necklace made of grody old toenails barely registers on the grossometer. It's not made of severed toes, people; it's just nails. Sometimes they fall off. Deal with it.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:58 AM on May 17, 2007


Two words that just don't go together: Toenail and Necklace. I wonder if the germans have a word for it?
posted by blue_beetle at 8:02 AM on May 17, 2007


blue_beetle, I'm pretty sure they call it die Zehennagelhalskette.
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:07 AM on May 17, 2007 [1 favorite]


Zehennagelehalskette
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:07 AM on May 17, 2007


Hah, I saw this on the ultralist.

I've got every toenail I've lost running ultras in my cufflink box at home.
posted by OmieWise at 8:13 AM on May 17, 2007


Holy toe fungus! What the hell is happening with MeFi? In the past couple days there have been FPPs about nasty Japanese toilets, a mailman tossing a piss-filled latex glove out on the street, and now a toenail necklace.

Can't we just get back to our standard topics of politics, world events, and single Youtube whatwhattery?
posted by schleppo at 8:19 AM on May 17, 2007


What, are you new?
posted by oneirodynia at 8:32 AM on May 17, 2007


*gag*
posted by everichon at 8:44 AM on May 17, 2007


DO NOT WANT!
posted by cerebus19 at 8:51 AM on May 17, 2007


miss l., if you're here and have read this far down, you really don't want to look -- it's a bunch of grody dismembered toenails. You're welcome.
posted by pax digita at 9:08 AM on May 17, 2007


Tacky. Men shouldn't wear jewelry. He should have fashioned them into cufflinks.
posted by Atom Eyes at 9:10 AM on May 17, 2007


I think that's pretty rad. Except for the purplish one. Don't forget that this has been going on forever.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:15 AM on May 17, 2007


The best part about keeping my gnarly old brown and purple toe talons around is that they're great to scratch my prolapsed rectum with.
posted by The Straightener at 9:38 AM on May 17, 2007 [2 favorites]


This is clearly the right jewelry wear to a night out drinking.
posted by felix at 10:18 AM on May 17, 2007


The second link should really be tagged "NSFL" (not safe for lunch).
posted by cerebus19 at 10:22 AM on May 17, 2007


I can't decide what's more revolting - this or the question in AskMeFi about Wolf Creek. This, I think.
posted by Flashman at 10:52 AM on May 17, 2007


it would be endearing, if it wasn't so devilishly gross.

A loving tribute to the ultra community's obsession with feet, and the most revolting private joke imaginable.

If you don't run ultras, you won't understand.
posted by seawallrunner at 11:04 AM on May 17, 2007


Right NSFL. I click on the necklace just as I'm chewing on a blanched almond. I gagged.
posted by mygoditsbob at 11:17 AM on May 17, 2007


A loving tribute to the ultra community's obsession with feet

And on John Vonhof's birthday, no less.
posted by OmieWise at 11:21 AM on May 17, 2007


The best part about keeping my gnarly old brown and purple toe talons around is that they're great to scratch my prolapsed rectum with.

Straightener, I am so man-crushing on you right now.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 11:34 AM on May 17, 2007 [1 favorite]


Well, his comment certainly made me straighter.
posted by hermitosis at 11:38 AM on May 17, 2007


The necklace wasn't that disgusting, talking about removing his toenails with needle-nose pliers was though.
posted by BrotherCaine at 12:11 PM on May 17, 2007


The best part about keeping my gnarly old brown and purple toe talons around is that they're great to scratch my prolapsed rectum with.

Okay, now that's just gross.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:22 PM on May 17, 2007 [1 favorite]


waitaminute.

Am I to understand that toenail loss before, during or after a marathon is common? Or that runners forceably extract their toenails before a marathon? 'Cause that's causing me much more mental trauma than the picture.
posted by lekvar at 12:28 PM on May 17, 2007


lekvar - no, no one extracts their toenails before a marathon, that is dangerous, prone to infection and would just hurt too much.

However, it's common for ultrarunners to lose a toenail or few after a gruelling event. And the toenails eventually grow back, that takes a few months, but then they detach much easier when traumatized again.

I've pretty much lost every one of my toenails (not all at once!) over the years. And now either of my big-toenails will typically get hurt and fall off about once a year.

I run lots, and I also hike on rocky rooty terrain over weekends or during a weeklong adventure.

the first time it happened I hurt a LOT before the nail became black, then stopped hurting and eventually fell off on its own.

The second time it happened, it still hurt, but the gross-out factor was lesser.

I don't know too many ultrarunners on the ultra list who have preserved all of their toenails during their running years. It's a rite of passage - you read about it, it happens to you, you deal with it, you get over it.

Remember, ultrarunners run distances longer than a marathon (eg longer than 26.2 mils) during their events. These races could be 50k, 50 miles, 100 miles or even longer. And they train and train and train some more, leading up to these events.

So yeah, there might be a loss of a toenail or few during a training year.

But this is the first time I hear of a necklace (honouring some pretty courageous ultrarunners, too). Very funny, very gross.
posted by seawallrunner at 1:21 PM on May 17, 2007


yuck. Can we request a NSFL {Not Suitable for Lunch} tag?

Anyone want my fusilli with black mushrooms in cream sauce, I can't finish it.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 1:37 PM on May 17, 2007


When body parts start falling off, is that a sign that "healthy sport" has become "unhealthy obsession"?
posted by Cranberry at 1:45 PM on May 17, 2007


Seawallrunner, do you get a toenail fungal infection after losing toenails? That happened to a friend of mine, and now she cant get rid of it.
posted by BrotherCaine at 1:46 PM on May 17, 2007


There is at least one ultrarunner who had his toenails surgically removed and the beds cauterized so they wouldn't grow back. He's reportedly very happy with the results, and he is a good runner.

(I've never gotten fungus from losing a nail, but then I only lost nails my first couple of long races, after that they've gone partially black but never come off.)
posted by OmieWise at 1:59 PM on May 17, 2007


BrotherCaine: I know how she can get rid of it, but she's not going to like it. When I was a wee intern one of the surgeons grabbed me in the hall one afternoon and asked me to help him with a case. We scrubbed in and I saw that the patient had been prepped so that her toes were exposed, which threw me because I was used to assisting (read: pulling blindly on a retractor for three hours) in the standard abdominal surgery of the day. The surgeon explained that this woman had had a problem with chronic fungal infection of her toenails and had finally gotten fed up and agreed to have them removed. All of them. I was handed a pair of mosquito clamps and told to go to town on the right foot. He showed me how to stick the closed clamps all the way under the toenail then open them to separate the toenail from the underlying tissue, then grab the toenail and pull it off. Once we did so blood oozed up from the exposed nailbed; we cauterized these areas and that was it. And that woman I presume is walking around today with no toenails.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 2:02 PM on May 17, 2007 [1 favorite]


On preview: OmieWise--there you go!
posted by Turtles all the way down at 2:03 PM on May 17, 2007


pretty freaky
posted by Flood at 2:07 PM on May 17, 2007


Turtles: OMG!

A shiver just went down my spine. All the way to my toenails.
posted by gergtreble at 7:31 PM on May 17, 2007


Now my toe nails itch from Turtles all the way down's story. < shudder>
posted by susanbeeswax at 9:48 PM on May 17, 2007


Thanks Turtles, it may get to that point, but it isn't severe yet.
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:11 AM on May 18, 2007


I once knew a guy who got fed up with his toenails while he was in med school. He had a fellow student remove and cauterize them.

This man is a podiatrist.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:09 AM on May 18, 2007


Wow, thought it was just me. Never thought to keep it, though. Wish I had known it was common at the time. Kinda freaked me out.
posted by dreamsign at 11:07 AM on May 18, 2007


Weird -- I know that Mark Williams! We work at the same place here in St. Louis.
posted by bkeaggy at 1:58 PM on May 18, 2007


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