Comments on: Bolt ya nugget.

Bolt ya nugget.

ClanvidHorse — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:37:55 -0800

Bolt ya nugget. A send up of ned culture in Glasgow. [Single youtube link alert]

By: Olli

Olli — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:45:16 -0800

Team.

By: chuckdarwin

chuckdarwin — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:47:37 -0800

http://www.chavscum.co.uk/ http://www.scallycentral.com/ http://www.newcastlestuff.com/charver/masterclass.html

By: ClanvidHorse

ClanvidHorse — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:51:04 -0800

Chuck I am not really into the stuff like chav scum because it is unnecessarily condescending and nasty. The video is funny because it is accurate, true to life and the lyrics are the perfect representation of the way many people speak in the West of Scotland. I dont think it is overly condescending or superior either.

By: gigbutt

gigbutt — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:55:58 -0800

That's s seriously fucked up scar that guys got on his face. So What's Ned Culture up to in that video anyway? Besides enjoying what appears to be a frosty cold beverage. Is he speaking chinese?

By: Abiezer

Abiezer — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:57:07 -0800

Buck fast, die young...please.

By: chuckdarwin

chuckdarwin — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:57:59 -0800

I dont think it is overly condescending or superior either. Not being an expert on Glaswegian culture, I guess I'll have to take your word for it. *thinks of shot of ned in the yt link making humping motions, rapping 'I'm gwain tae fuck yer muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum'*

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:58:34 -0800

Chavhemian Rhapsody

By: muthecow

muthecow — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:58:59 -0800

If you want a funnier version of this video check out Devvo.

By: homodigitalis

homodigitalis — Fri, 18 May 2007 03:59:31 -0800

Ouch.

By: the cuban

the cuban — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:20:48 -0800

Get it pumped!

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:20:59 -0800

gigbutt writes 'Is he speaking chinese?' Translation: Here, mate? Whit? You lookin' a' mah burd? Naw How no? 'Tryin tae say she's ugleh ur sommat? Ah wis like 'at: yer maw's hangin' oot the back ayer granny like 'at, yas Ah wis like 'at: yer maw's hangin' oot the back ayer granny like 'at, yas Ah wis like 'at: yer maw's hangin' oot the back ayer granny like 'at, yas Ah'm gonnae pump yur maw Here you, that'w beh right, I heard yeh tried tae bump mah stash last night Here you, what's the fuckin' script? You're a wee bawbag, yur jaw's gettin' ripped Here you, ya stupi' wee daftie, dinnae wanna gie' ya one, bu' a think I'm gonnae haftae Gonna jump aw ovur yur heed, that'w teach yeh fur stealin' mah weed Here you, that'w be right Here you, bowt ya nugget Here you, that'w beh righ' Here you, bowt ya nuggit Ah'm gonna rip yur jaw Ah'm goin' doon the 'toon tae see if ah geh luckeh If I cannae get a burd, ah'll drink some mer bucky Wash it doon wae a coupl'a piws Ah hope 3 eccies'll cure mah ills Ge' a quarter a pund o'Lou Reed Ah'll wake up in the mornin', I'll probably be deed Dinnae worreh, he's got Johnny Cash Roger McGliff fur ma' rockin' ass If that doesnae work ah'll get some crack Freebasin' coke and then some smack PCP! Psylocibin's eh potion fur me Here you, that'w be righ' Here you, bolt ya nugget Here you, that'w be righ' Here you, bolt ya nugget Ah'm gonna rip yur jaw Don't gie's any'yur, don't gie's us anyur shite Ah pumped yur maw last nigh' Don't gie's any'yur, don't gie's us anyur shite Ah smoked yur dope last night Here mate, yera dick Here mate, Yere a dick Here you, here you, here you, bol' ya nugget Here you, here you, that'w be righ' Whit ya daen, ya mad fanny?

By: Jakey

Jakey — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:30:57 -0800

Whatever Ned Alphabet More fun at Glasgow Survival, ya shower ae bawbags.

By: srboisvert

srboisvert — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:37:53 -0800

Is the torture that pastabagel was going on about? If so I am ready to give up a source.

By: sgt.serenity

sgt.serenity — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:47:30 -0800

There's nothing worse than these terrible portrayals of glesga neds with the music hall timing that's been comin out of glasgow since francie and josie - another bore joins the rab c nesbitt theatre company and will soon be appearing in river city, that crappy ghost thing on bbc scotland,whatever chewin the fat are doing now,the unfunny sketch that gets shoved as a filler into only an excuse,a goverment health advert and probably panto at the kings to succeed gerard kelly in a few decades. Did i mention taggart ?

By: pracowity

pracowity — Fri, 18 May 2007 04:58:30 -0800

Oh, dear. Most of this stuff's not very amusing, but maybe you have to live there to laugh. Our local variant is the dres.

By: Nugget

Nugget — Fri, 18 May 2007 05:16:02 -0800

..but maybe you have to live there to laugh. Nope, it doesn't help.

By: phirleh

phirleh — Fri, 18 May 2007 05:16:21 -0800

Needs more glassing.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:00:06 -0800

pracowity writes 'Our local variant is the dres.' Fascinating link, pracowity. I would never have imagined that the Eastern European variant of the chav would so closely resemble our own.

By: Jody Tresidder

Jody Tresidder — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:01:32 -0800

You get much sweeter sassenach satisfaction if you've got friends in Glasgow who insist the city is practically the Paris of the north these days. Can't wait to send it on!

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:11:13 -0800

There's nothing worse than these terrible portrayals of glesga neds Particularly when they're done in the voice of Wee Jimmy Krankie like this one was.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:28:54 -0800

So whats the diffrence between a Ned and a Chav?

By: Turtles all the way down

Turtles all the way down — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:33:18 -0800

This is being sent straight to my favorite expat Senga.

By: pracowity

pracowity — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:37:11 -0800

I would never have imagined that the Eastern European variant of the chav would so closely resemble our own. Kids imitate to be cool, and mainly they imitate black American hip-hop city kids as seen on MTV. One skinny dork in Detroit borrows his fat friend's trousers and the next thing you know it's cool all around the world to wear jeans that are falling off your ass.

By: fire&wings

fire&wings — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:44:22 -0800

Metafilter reacts to Glasgow-related FPP. Anyone know where I can get orange flavoured Irn Bru in the states?

By: lemonfridge

lemonfridge — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:48:12 -0800

Earlier this year I stayed in the hotel seen in the background (to the left of the armadillo type building) throughout the video. I'm from the dirty south, and I have to say I loved Glasgow. The people we're great, and so was the night-life. Thankfully I didn't meet anyone like this guy.

By: Nugget

Nugget — Fri, 18 May 2007 06:54:46 -0800

So whats the diffrence between a Ned and a Chav? Chav is an English term, Ned is a Scottish one, but they mean the same thing.

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Fri, 18 May 2007 07:08:56 -0800

From that wikipedia article on Dres: # Driving their car with the left elbow resting outside the rolled-down window. This is known as the zimny łokieć (the cold elbow). # Love of mobile phones # Keeping of aggressive dog breeds, such as the Pit Bull or American Staffordshire Terrier as pets (dresiarze sometimes engage in dog fights). # Habitually eating roasted chicken, Döner kebab and McDonald's. # Violent contempt towards: students, intelligentsia, skateboarders, long haired males, vegetarians, punk rock, heavy metal, as well as Muslims and black people. # Excessive littering. The "cold elbow", the roasted chicken, the excessive littering. It's fucking magic.

By: eddydamascene

eddydamascene — Fri, 18 May 2007 07:10:42 -0800

Anyone know where I can get orange flavoured Irn Bru in the states? here

By: hydatius

hydatius — Fri, 18 May 2007 07:18:12 -0800

More amusing Glaswegian youtubery. [audio nsfw]

By: docgonzo

docgonzo — Fri, 18 May 2007 07:46:19 -0800

I lilke how our hero has a disturbing resemblance to a young Damon Albarn.

By: TheCassiniDivision

TheCassiniDivision — Fri, 18 May 2007 08:11:43 -0800

What would Rab C Nesbitt make of it all?

By: davy

davy — Fri, 18 May 2007 08:12:37 -0800

Oh, you mean Neds!

By: TheCassiniDivision

TheCassiniDivision — Fri, 18 May 2007 08:15:06 -0800

Last link shoud have been Rab C Nesbitt

By: boosh

boosh — Fri, 18 May 2007 08:30:23 -0800

Whit are ye starin' at, ya fanny? Still Game

By: loquacious

loquacious — Fri, 18 May 2007 09:10:16 -0800

Man, that was a really small spliff.

By: scruss

scruss — Fri, 18 May 2007 10:36:41 -0800

Lovely. Reminds me of my record store days in Glasgow: "Haw mate, got any Bangin' Choons #37?"

By: nickyskye

nickyskye — Fri, 18 May 2007 18:06:53 -0800

Loved that! Hilarious. White inner city boys imitating black inner city boys, who are usually abused by racist white inner city boys has always been strange to me. Yeah, ragged scar, kind of like a knife fight scar. Superb transliteration PeterMcDermott. Thanks. Also so interesting to learn about the Dres culture. It reminded me of my exbf from Montenegro, who was gaga about Sergio Tacchini tracksuits when he first came to the USA in the early 90's.

By: chuckdarwin

chuckdarwin — Sat, 19 May 2007 01:28:46 -0800

NED #1: Good day, fine sir. NED #2: Excuse me? NED #1: Are you, perchance, making eyes at my girlfriend? NED #2: No. NED #1: Why not? Are you saying that she is unattractive? I was inebriated on some illicit substance while performing anal sex on your grandmother! (x3) I am going to have sexual intercourse with your mother. I don't think so, sir I heard you tried to steal my drugs last night Excuse me, what's going on? You're not a very nice person and I am going to assault you You stupid little idiot I don't want to hurt you but I think I'm going to have to Going to jump on your head That will teach you a lesson for stealing my marijuana I don't think so, sir You'd better run away (x3) I am going to assault you I'm going into Glasgow to see if anybody will have sex with me If the women aren't interested I'll drink some more Buckie Wash it down with a couple of pills I know those ecstasy tablets will make me feel better Get a (??) of cannabis When I wake up in the morning I'll probably be dead Don't worry, he's got some money Roll a spiff of Moroccan hash If that doesn't work we'll get some crack Freebase some coke and then some smack PCP, psilocybin's the potion for me I don't think so, sir You'd better run away (x3) I am going to assault you (I don't think so) Don't give me any of your Don't give me any of your Don't give me any of your nonsense (I had sex with your mother last night) Don't give me any of your Don't give me any of your Don't give me any of your nonsense (I smoked your marijuana last night) What are you doing, you idiot?? http://www.mankyrecords.com/lyrics.htm Translation by http://lastyearsgirl.pixlet.net/

By: msbrauer

msbrauer — Sat, 19 May 2007 06:12:28 -0800

This makes me think of Kersal Massive.