Comments on: Jump back, wanna kiss myself!

Jump back, wanna kiss myself!

bwg — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:02:48 -0800

If you could kiss yourself, would you? These photos make it happen, and the results are ... disturbing. Site is in French.

By: bwg

bwg — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:03:34 -0800

Some nudity, might not be safe for work.

By: CitrusFreak12

CitrusFreak12 — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:04:30 -0800

Ha! These are awesome! This is my favorite.

By: milarepa

milarepa — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:08:41 -0800

That is awesome.

By: Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese

Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:08:47 -0800

Why did they shoot only homosexuals?

By: Bletch

Bletch — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:08:59 -0800

Only kiss? :(

By: papakwanz

papakwanz — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:12:15 -0800

Dude, I would TOTALLY do my clone.

By: liquorice

liquorice — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:14:08 -0800

Hell yes I'd kiss myself. And then film it and sell it online and become famous and stuff. It'd be awesome. Know what else is awesome? Hitler. No, wait. These photos!

By: oflinkey

oflinkey — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:18:05 -0800

Twins?

By: Partial Law

Partial Law — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:18:19 -0800

By: papakwanz

papakwanz — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:18:52 -0800

I Babelfish'ed the little paragraph in the opening in the hopes that it would give some explanation of the process, and this is what I got: The marvellous one in the photograph, it is that it collects a glance, a gesture, one moment, fugacious reality from where the emotion spouts out. However, which is presented here does not exist, never existed and will never exist. But the technical control makes that one is there, in front of, like a funambulist on his wire, in unstable balance between I believe it and I do not believe it. These moments were invented by Pupsam. And yet, yes, it is report, because it was necessary to arrive from there there a long investigation and great interior voyages: Starting from an agreeing individual, to imagine together its meeting with itself (not another, not its double) to form a couple which will be embraced, then to track the posture, the spark in the?il, finally the abandonment with the other which is me to give to see the impossible kiss monstrueusement, impudic. Then? moments desired, dreamed, hidden with the bottom of us, denied... taboo! Perhaps fugacious unreality from where the disorder spouts out.

By: Bighappyfunhouse

Bighappyfunhouse — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:20:41 -0800

Somewhere in the world, Christina Amphlett is smiling.

By: Item

Item — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:24:22 -0800

Somewhere else in the world, Christina Applegate is frowning.

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:28:54 -0800

This site is worthless without Spock with/without goatee.

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:29:09 -0800

*shudders*

By: horsewithnoname

horsewithnoname — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:29:51 -0800

I'd do my clone if he were a little taller and wasn't such a selfish prick.

By: Dave Faris

Dave Faris — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:30:13 -0800

Fortune cookie wisdom : The best love is self-love.

By: Bookhouse

Bookhouse — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:36:57 -0800

Metafilter: fugacious reality from where the emotion spouts out.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:37:15 -0800

Yeah, that sounds kinda French.

By: interrobang

interrobang — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:37:28 -0800

Number 5 is sort of hilarious.

By: Miastar

Miastar — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:37:34 -0800

Most of the guys totally French kiss themselves. Sluts!

By: gottabefunky

gottabefunky — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:42:38 -0800

Shit, I know people who go through their entire life like this.

By: Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America

Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:44:07 -0800

I can, and I rarely do.

By: jewzilla

jewzilla — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:45:37 -0800

I have my tongue in my own mouth right now!

By: fandango_matt

fandango_matt — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:46:18 -0800

Is that incest, or masturbation?

By: bjork24

bjork24 — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:48:54 -0800

Deleted scene from LOST.

By: Samizdata

Samizdata — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:51:01 -0800

I always counted clone sex as masturbation, except with less RSI...

By: rob511

rob511 — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 21:56:50 -0800

Garlic breath, canker sores, mono ... I'm so ~~there~~ here!

By: peep

peep — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:00:40 -0800

Does anyone remember the "Max on Max" segments from Conan O'Brien? Those disturbed me greatly. Same concept. Eww.

By: mathowie

mathowie — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:00:44 -0800

holy creepy.

By: gomichild

gomichild — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:08:15 -0800

It's monstrueusement!

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:11:00 -0800

I always counted clone sex as masturbation, except with less RSI... Ye gods, initially read as clown sex. I'm thinking: nude websurfing is one thing; put away the white makeup and floppy shoes, for godsake. Also: this needs to be done with Mummenschantz.

By: hindmost

hindmost — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:11:05 -0800

I...I don't get it. Why is it that the idea of doing twins is totally hot but this is fucking creepy as hell?

By: loquacious

loquacious — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:14:16 -0800

Is it wrong that I get creeped out by the guys and totally turned on by the girls? I guess that means I'm not gay. Can I clone a girl version of myself? That would probably be incredibly awesome or impossibly shitty.

By: converge

converge — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:24:22 -0800

While we're on the subject... Gawd, I'm an idiot.

By: bobo123

bobo123 — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:29:48 -0800

Star Trek VI, Captain Kirk is fighting an alien shape shifter... Captain James T. Kirk: I can't believe I kissed you. Martia (appearing as Kirk): Must have been your lifelong ambition.

By: oddman

oddman — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 22:30:18 -0800

I want a picture of me kissing me. I want it now. I will pay. Seriously, it would be unimaginably awesome to have a 5x7 of my making out with myself on my desk when students stopped by to chat. (I don't read French well enough to slog through the website, do they do commission work? Can anyone tell me?)

By: dgaicun

dgaicun — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 23:01:20 -0800

Pshaw, who needs this fancy digital technology; photographer Joel-Peter Witkin was able to create the same effect using only a corpse and a hacksaw.

By: Slithy_Tove

Slithy_Tove — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 23:07:47 -0800

Can I clone a girl version of myself? That would probably be incredibly awesome or impossibly shitty. The answer is 'both'. David Gerrold, The Man Who Folded Himself.

By: papakwanz

papakwanz — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 23:26:23 -0800

converge: I fucking love that song. It's like a nerdy Eminem.

By: cgc373

cgc373 — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 23:59:50 -0800

John Varley also writes about clones and sex in a few places, notably in "The Phantom of Kansas." That story's also got an artist whose medium is weather in enclosed "disneylands" on the Moon. Have fun.

By: amyms

amyms — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 00:27:22 -0800

John Varley also writes about clones and sex in a few places, notably in "The Phantom of Kansas." See? It IS Kansas Week on Metafilter!

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 00:29:21 -0800

solosuck.com. Definitely NSFW, but more fun that kissing yourself IMO.

By: jb

jb — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 00:39:57 -0800

They are lovely photographs, but many of them don't look to me like someone kissing themself, but just like couples who have grown to look a lot alike (as many couples do). I'm not shocked by them - I have to remind myself that they are the same person, and not just two men or two women who strongly resemble each other and are wearing the same clothes (as couples also do, at least come laundry day).

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 01:26:43 -0800

Yeah, I really didn't need to see the solosuck site. kthxbye.

By: Mikey-San

Mikey-San — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 01:47:21 -0800

Yeah, I really didn't need to see the solosuck site. kthxbye. What exactly did you think you were going to see when you went there? Bunnies and rainbows?

By: Drexen

Drexen — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 01:53:17 -0800

That site is hot as hell and I would definitely do myself to Montana and back. Which is a pretty long way.

By: divabat

divabat — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:21:16 -0800

My friends had a camera which let you take half of a photo, then take the other half, and combine them. It was meant for situations where there is only two of you and no one else to take the photo, so it'd look like you two were in the shot together. Much hilarity ensued with that camera. A lot of fighting-oneself and feeding-oneself, but there is always a selfkiss photo. (ha! I'd do myself too, out of curiosity. And I'd also like a selfkiss photo if that was possible.)

By: chrismear

chrismear — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:24:07 -0800

Sod that, I'm a lousy kisser.

By: Jilder

Jilder — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:26:08 -0800

Feeling quite comfortably deviant here. I find this very hot and yes, I'd do me. I know what I want, when I want, dammit. And I'd want footage. This is why people don't let me talk to small children too often.

By: LMGM

LMGM — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:52:26 -0800

OK, here's a translation of the site's text for the non-frenchy: "The marvelous thing about a photo is that it captures a look, a gesture, an instant, a fleeting reality from which emotion springs. However, what is presented here does not exist, has never existed, and will never exist. But this technique puts us there, in front, like a tightrope walker on his rope, in an unstable balance between I believe it and I don't believe it. "These instants were invented by Pupsam. And yet, indeed, this is a record of real events (reportage), since long searches and deep internal journeys were necessary to arrive here: "Starting from one consenting individual, imagine together his encounter with himself (not another, but his double), to create a couple that will embrace each other, then trace their posture, the spark in their eyes, and finally the abandon to the other that is me, to make visible the impossible kiss, monstrously shameless. And so? moments that are desired, dreamed, hidden at the bottom of us, denied... taboo! Perhaps the fleeting reality from which trouble springs. "Louis Samaria

By: LMGM

LMGM — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:53:52 -0800

Oh, I forgot to translate the titles: Selfkiss: report on the other half of the orange. I'm guessing this is a similar expression to "the other side of the fence" in English.

By: LMGM

LMGM — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 02:57:22 -0800

Oh, and my favourite selfkiss is this one (NSFW). Now that's some man-booty. Oh, and I would totally get a selfkiss pic, although I suspect the results would be far less pretty than these.

By: Joey Michaels

Joey Michaels — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 03:02:21 -0800

I like the ones where one self seems to be reluctant to be kissed by the other more eager self. Does that count as Date Rape if you're the only one involved?

By: bwg

bwg — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 03:41:56 -0800

Does that count as Date Rape if you're the only one involved? Only if you slip roofies into your own drink when you're not looking.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:01:54 -0800

miss lynnster writes 'Yeah, I really didn't need to see the solosuck site. kthxbye.' That must be why you just clicked on 'enter this site' without bothering to read the mountains of text that says stuff like: "This free, sexually explicit Website contains hardcore sex pictures and videos of sexy gay and str8 selfsuckers sucking their own dicks and eating their own hot sperm." Here's a tip for the future though, miss lynnster: websites that open to a disclaimer/age appropriate declaration almost always tend to be filled with more than just T and A.

By: CautionToTheWind

CautionToTheWind — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:23:35 -0800

Futhermore, websites that open to a disclaimer/age appropriate declaration without a single teaser pic on the first page are usually not for the weak.

By: Lezzles

Lezzles — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:27:25 -0800

Well done LMGM. You beat me too it. Not nearly as pretentious as Babelfish made it sound.

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:38:57 -0800

Interesting concept, and skilled execution. This one made me laugh.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:51:12 -0800

Also: @Miss Lynnster: Obviously, the clearest case of penis envy I ever saw. Autofellatio does tend to bring it out in women. Also: "She gets too hungry for eating fast food, She posts here often, and sometimes is nude, She rarely whines though, when people get crude, That's why Miss Lynnster is a tramp. Sings like an angel, in torch songs and blues, She bakes her cocktails, that's always good news, She went to Egypt, saw pyramids too, That's why Miss Lynnster is a tramp, She makes her free, fresh posts on the blue, Metamusic too, Bowie on coke? Well that's OK Lives in California, It's cold and it's damp, That's why Miss Lynnster is a tramp.

By: localroger

localroger — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 05:25:59 -0800

slithy_tove, my wife and I long ago retitled David Gerrold's most perverted work as The Man Who Fondled Himself. Works much better.

By: hermitosis

hermitosis — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:04:39 -0800

Björk self-kiss.

By: hermitosis

hermitosis — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:10:03 -0800

You know, miss lynnster, if you just go ahead and choose a mate, all the sniffing and circling will end.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:10:17 -0800

I had to stop once I got to the mime. I just couldn't suspend my disbelief any longer. I mean, like anyone would kiss a mime.

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:19:19 -0800

GodfatherofSoulFilter

By: squasha

squasha — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:26:48 -0800

Is this where I confess how many self-kiss photos have been shot with the Mac PhotoBooth app on the more "private" computer, upstairs? No? Kewl. I think these triggered a bit of the uncanny valley revulsion, but were mostly disturbing because pretty much every "couple" save the two Erics had one clone with their eyes open, (and obviously not *into* it) and that shit always weirds me out. And also? This thread, with "Clonefucker" as the backing track, totally made me forget about my shitty day prostituting my native tongue. Yay.

By: chuckdarwin

chuckdarwin — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:31:15 -0800

Great, now we have the auto-fellatio URL in two threads.

By: desjardins

desjardins — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:33:01 -0800

I have good breath, so yeah, I'd kiss myself. But I wouldn't sleep with myself. I snore.

By: humannaire

humannaire — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:51:25 -0800

This is new? It's what I spent my entire thirties doing - "doing" alternate versions of myself. (I spent my twenties breaking taboos. Figure that one out.) But now that I am in my forties, spending time with myself is played out. After all, maybe I have something to offere to someone besides myself/someone beside myself? Also, now I know I really want to be a woman, to have all the extra parts cut-off and to be reconfigured, so I am saving for that. And to be honest, a man like me is painfully worthless. At least to a straight man or a straight woman. After all, I'm a straight woman in a man's body. (But, if it's any consolation, were it to happen? I understand that I am a very good kisser.)

By: hermitosis

hermitosis — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:54:26 -0800

Careful, self-kissing is the first step toward self-impregnation, and then who ya gonna sue for child-support? No one, that's who. Well, I suppose you could always try to hang paternity on someone else, but if he asks for a DNA test you risk that embarrassing moment when, instead of just a ding or a buzz, the analysis machine starts playing that creepy Joker laugh from the end of "Batman" and then shorts out. And that's not the sort of thing that gets you invited back to the Maury Povich show. Man, am I drunk.

By: vronsky

vronsky — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 08:18:59 -0800

You're a funny drunk though. That's cool.

By: danb

danb — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 09:02:11 -0800

These are great! Is that a reference to Earth Jam in the title?

By: cowbellemoo

cowbellemoo — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 09:20:01 -0800

I must try this.

By: quin

quin — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 09:36:04 -0800

If you could kiss yourself, would you? Good lord no! I've seen what I look like. Also, I learned a long time ago, don't get involved with a crazy person. It always ends badly.

By: mostlymartha

mostlymartha — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 10:16:43 -0800

I think I'm with Jilder in "feeling quite comfortably deviant." A few of those (Jean-Laurent and Vincent H. in particular) were super hot. I think it would be fabulous to have one of those of myself. And I couldn't help but be reminded of an incident, back in my even more deviant college days, when I got to see a boy with whom I was involved passionately kiss another boy to whom he bore a surprising resemblance. I've always thought the twin thing was gross, but seeing what looked like a person I found attractive kiss what very nearly looked like themselves was intensely sexy. So clearly, these photos push a very odd button of mine.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 10:30:33 -0800

C'est weird, mais c'est hawt aussi. Oui, je failed La French 101. Je me not care.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 10:43:15 -0800

cowbellemoo writes 'I must try this.' I've been trying the autofellatio thing my whole life. During my teens, I seemed to be getting closer, closer, closer... Then, at some point, my chances of succeeding began receeding, receeding, receeding -- until eventually, it was just a dot on the horizon. I call out it's name -- "John! John Thomas!!" -- but the only response that I get is hollow, mocking laughter. hermitosis writes 'You know, miss lynnster, if you just go ahead and choose a mate, all the sniffing and circling will end.'

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jgs='=='='--'==+='--'===+'-'=='-'==+=='-'+='-'===+='-'=='-'==+=

Choo-choo-choose me!

By: hermitosis

hermitosis — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 11:37:40 -0800

Then, at some point, my chances of succeeding began receeding, receeding, receeding -- until eventually, it was just a dot on the horizon. Whether you meant it this way or not, what at a poetic expression for the gradual eclipsing of one's sexual organs by one's rounding figure! I'm imagining this as sort of a pale, flabby sunset.

By: jonmc

jonmc — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 13:33:45 -0800

If I had two sets of lips, I'd kiss mahself, HAIIII! (yes, I would, I'm sexy as hell)

By: pax digita

pax digita — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 13:48:59 -0800

I doubt I'd let me kiss myself.

By: buriednexttoyou

buriednexttoyou — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 15:41:27 -0800

I was recently thinking about how awesome it would be to have two of me, and that it would make rent a lot cheaper because both Daves would have jobs, but we wouldn't mind sharing the same space. But never once did it occur to me that we might kiss. So I guess I don't have to worry about being totally in love with myself.

By: Dave Faris

Dave Faris — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 15:45:15 -0800

Obligatory youtube link.

By: britain

britain — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 17:12:01 -0800

I love me, I love me, I'm wild about myself I love me, I love me, don't need nobody else You may not like the way I look, but me thinks I look fine I love to look into my eyes and say I'm mine, all mine I love me, I love me, I love myself to death I love me, I love me, 'til I'm all out of breath I take me to a quiet place Put my arms around my waist If me gets fresh, I slap my face I'm wild about myself - Mel Blanc