Comments on: what part of the cow do you use in the burgers cos i heard it was the teeth.

what part of the cow do you use in the burgers cos i heard it was the teeth.

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:31:54 -0800

McDonald's UK goes Web 2.0 with a site answering user's questions. Apparently, all of them.

By: damo

damo — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:38:31 -0800

I like this FAQ interface, not getting dragged around by anchor tags...

By: Pogo_Fuzzybutt

Pogo_Fuzzybutt — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:39:55 -0800

This is pretty awesome. But the inanity of the questions is somewhat disturbing.

By: NationalKato

NationalKato — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:40:57 -0800

I read in the paper that some burger contain poo. Is this really true? If so, what proportion of burgers contain poo?

By: WPW

WPW — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:42:26 -0800

Refreshing and well-made, unlike the food.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:42:33 -0800

That's pretty amazing, actually. They answer some pretty banal questions. I guess you have to invent some interesting PR moves when you've been through one of the worst-publicity trials in corporate history.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:42:51 -0800

I can't stop laughing. I want to bookmark this, but I'm worried it's only a matter of time before McDonald's sterilizes this site and kills off all its natural glory.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:45:04 -0800

McDonalds UK should hire at least one copy editor: The Big Mac beef patty is smaller than the Quarter Pounder beef patty, it weighs 45g before cooking. However, each Big Mac contains two beef of these patties. TWO beef! TWICE as many good!

By: Firas

Firas — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:45:58 -0800

My god those questions are inwardly focused. How about, eg. Do your employees get health benefits? Are your cattle free range?

By: NationalKato

NationalKato — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:47:05 -0800

Wait, you mean there are stupid British too? Whoda thunk?

By: demiurge

demiurge — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:47:47 -0800

These responders really have a lot of patience. I would have started to break once I got to: are your baconburgers kosher?

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:48:59 -0800

Is it true that your food tastes so good because you cook with care and attention? What's your secret!? I love your food more than my wife!

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:49:26 -0800

isit true that there has been a case where a person has found a eyeball in one of your burgers?? No, McDonald’s is not aware of any case like this ever happening.

By: samstarling

samstarling — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:49:28 -0800

My favourite is "Are your milkshakes made from dogs lips?"

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:49:42 -0800

if you start with 100% beef, then add a pinch of salt, what percentage is the beef in your burgers? This is a goldmine.

By: jonson

jonson — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:51:05 -0800

Why did your employees ejaculate into my grandmother's milkshake?

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:51:31 -0800

Why is it that Hamburgers are made of beef? shouldn't they be made out of ham? The term ‘hamburger’ is a generic name for a style of beef sandwich that originated from Hamburg, Germany in the late 18th century. Originally called the ‘Hamburg Steak’, an early reference appears in 1802 edition of the Oxford Dictionary. This sandwich was made and continues to be made from beef, not pork

By: chunking express

chunking express — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:53:33 -0800

McDonalds is awesome. People love to hate it because it's so good.

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:53:59 -0800

Seven questions, all of which are "When are you bringing back the McRib?" This is hilarious. I can only imagine the board meeting that created this, and the aftermath. "Customers think we're unresponsive! We need to answer their questions about McDonald's." "We'll let them submit their questions online, and we'll answer them." "Yes! We'll answer all of them! Nobody will be able to say we're unresponsive then." **Memo comes down from corporate** "They want us to answer every single question? Don't they realize that most people are idiots?" "I guess we'll be answering some really stupid questions." "I guess so. Have fun."

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:54:00 -0800

I used to think your burgers were horrible, believing they were all mashed chicken head. I've only found out recently that it isn't. Is there any other way to get this good message to other people like me?

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:57:40 -0800

I was just going to post that one, gurple. How many people in this world spell burger "buger"? Honestly. I heard that your burge meat is taken from from the vagina of cows. Can you confirm 100% that this is not true? Oh my.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:57:55 -0800

Is it true that, although these questions appear to be naturalistic and unfiltered, they are actually thought up by marketing experts to give the most overall positive impression of McDonald's to the largest number of visitors to this website? OK, that one's mine. I'd ask it, but then I'd be playing into their marketing machine. :)

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:57:55 -0800

And what's wrong with mashed chicken head? My parents raised eleven children on mashed chicken head, and every single one of us turned out handsome, popular, and intelligent.

By: neustile

neustile — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:58:32 -0800

Saying that you paid extra money for any non-cheese topping bar item is an OUTRAGEOUS lie. I am sure everyone else on the message board sees this

By: L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg

L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:59:01 -0800

Maybe if enough people ask, the guy answering will eventually slip and let us know what's really in the burgers. "So the burgers contain horse meat, right?" "Our burgers are made from 100% beef." "Okay, yeah, but they have worms in them. Worms, right?" "Our burgers are made from 100% beef." "I see. And eyes? There are eyes in the burgers, yes?" "Our burgers are made from 100% beef." "Right, right. And how many human baby fingers go into each burger?" "About three."

By: uncleozzy

uncleozzy — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:59:24 -0800

My god those questions are inwardly focused. How about, eg. [...] Are your cattle free range? Look in the animal welfare section.

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:59:28 -0800

Best section? Menu suggestions. why mcdonald's doesn't change the food like make diferente burgers but not in short time but forever because i think the people get absed with the same burger all year and if you change a bit the menu you go make more money thanks catia

By: slimepuppy

slimepuppy — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:00:13 -0800

I have heard there are reindeer burger available at McDonald's restaurants in Finland. Is it true? 1. No, this is not true. McDonald’s sandwiches are made from beef, chicken and pork. Occasionally promotional burgers will be made from other meats such as lamb, but never reindeer. (June 2007) This made me laugh. Though I do like reindeer... Probably not from McDonalds, however. We did get the promotional rye-bread burger for a while.

By: The Straightener

The Straightener — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:01:07 -0800

"I've noticed recently that you can really taste the testicles in your burgers. Was the testicle to beef ratio in your patties recently altered, or did I perhaps just sample a testicle heavy batch of beef?" Thank you The Make Up Your Own Mind team endeavours to answer your question within two weeks. You will be sent an email when your answer is live on the site.

By: Pastabagel

Pastabagel — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:01:33 -0800

This is the best: My Wife and I often visit New York and, whilst waiting at Newark Airport on the homeward leg, i often have a McDonalds, very nice it is to. Could you tell me why the Burgers in Newark actually taste like Beef whereas those we get at home in the UK taste like nothing even remotely animal falvoured? Surely meat is meat...or is it? 1. All McDonald’s hamburger patties are made from 100 percent beef. Whole cuts from forequarter and flank are used (the same as any good mince you may buy at the supermarket), with a pinch of salt and pepper used after cooking for taste. McDonald’s UK has a policy to source all its ingredients locally whenever possible. Translation: UK burgers suck because UK beef sucks.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:01:47 -0800

I am dismayed to read that you are 'considering making your products halal.' Is McDonalds trying to appeal to a Muslim audience in particular? I am a meat eater but wouldn't be willing to buy meat slaughtered in this way because I believe it to be cruel. I'm pleased you're answering your critics but this is a step too far! I'm disappointed that you are pandering to this minority audience and would be interested as to why you are doing this...does your MR suggest this is adviseable? The Halal issue is complex. McDonald’s is currently reviewing the possibility of introducing some Halal products in its restaurants, however no decision has yet been reached. It is also unlikely that this would involve a wholesale conversion of meat to Halal and more likely that a specific range would be introduced so you would not have to eat Halal meat if you did not wish to.

By: ClanvidHorse

ClanvidHorse — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:02:29 -0800

I am glad to see that bored, semi-literate teenagers have better things to do than post on Bebo. Great stuff. Thanks for the link.

By: frecklefaerie

frecklefaerie — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:02:41 -0800

Yes, this is awesome. I wonder how many people are doing the answering or if some poor schlub has to do this in addition to the other McDonald's drudge work he or she does all day.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:04:31 -0800

im diabetic.what can i eat at macdonalds Unfortunately McDonald’s cannot give medical advice...

By: XQUZYPHYR

XQUZYPHYR — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:04:40 -0800

I'm wondering if their burgers are made from 100% beef. They seem very vague on that.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:06:38 -0800

Why do I get the Spurlock McGurgles everytime I eat at your resturants? McDonald’s is not aware of the ‘Spurlock McGurgles’ as being a specific phenomenon. Everyone has a different digestive rate and can be affected in different ways by the things that they eat.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:06:58 -0800

I’m an American currently living in England, why are portions here so small compared to the ones back in the states, smaller portions at a higher price? Portion sizes in UK are designed for the UK market. Pricing is country specific and depends on a number of factors including the cost of locally-sourced raw ingredients. Translation: "Just go back to America, fatty!" Goldmine indeed.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:07:32 -0800

McDonald’s hasn’t made any changes to its restaurants as a result of ‘Super Size Me’. OK, now they're just lying.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:09:02 -0800

OK, I'm getting post-happy and I'll stop abusing the thread, but this is just lovely: Have you (as a company) studied the documentary/film "Super Size Me" and have you learned anything from it?... Some of McDonald’s employees have watched the film but neither they, nor the company, learned anything new.

By: DU

DU — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:11:10 -0800

As funny as it is, I think the site works. Don't we all feel like, whether they are evil or not, they are responsive?

By: jcterminal

jcterminal — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:13:12 -0800

If modern science reaches a stage that can clone humans, and these clones are never legally considered "humans", and then it becomes legal to eat them (under the same strict safety guidelines as the meat industry follows), would McDonald's start serving human flesh in it's combo meals? McLongpork, perhaps?

By: fire&wings

fire&wings — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:14:47 -0800

Is it true you put cow ears in your milkshake? 1. No, this is not true.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:15:47 -0800

I asked a question about the Legendary Burger Which Grants Immortality, but I guess it may be a while before they get around to answering it.

By: RMD

RMD — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:20:48 -0800

Q. What is the best burger to serve with a 1982 Cheval Blanc? Does the mix and match of a bacon double cheese perfectly complement the ethereal and complex nose of the wine, or would I be better with a simple meat dish, such as a big mac and fries? A. Have you not considered the Quarter Pounder with Cheese? A timeless classic meets a once-in-a-generation legendary vintage. The bold flavours of 100 percent beef patty blend beautifully with the velvety smoothness of the wine – a match made in heaven.

By: John Kenneth Fisher

John Kenneth Fisher — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:21:56 -0800

"What is the average semen content of a big mac?" wow. just. wow.

By: probablysteve

probablysteve — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:23:22 -0800

There were no Kelis references in the Milkshake section. Yet.

By: Zephyrial

Zephyrial — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:30:01 -0800

Haha great! Stupid, but great!

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:31:26 -0800

Why did your emplyees ejactulate into my grandmother's milkshake? Any rumours and stories about this sort of behaviour have never been found to be true and are regarded as urban myths. If McDonald’s receive any allegations about bodily fluids in food these claims are fully investigated. If something like this were to happen any employee acting in this way would be dismissed.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:31:34 -0800

Is it true that McDonalds have given money to the IRA? McDonald's does not, and never has, funded the IRA. This story is based on an old urban myth that dates back to the 1970's when McDonald's first opened up shop in the UK. The payslips used for UK staff at that time were imported from the USA, and included printed reference to the American equivalent to NI pension contributions - the 'Individual Retirement Account' - or 'IRA' for short. The rumour that McDonald's donated to the IRA terrorist group arises from this misunderstanding.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:32:07 -0800

A red car traveling 100 miles west at 45 mph and a blue car traveling 70 miles east at 60 mph both start at the same point. How many Big Macs does Millie have?

By: escabeche

escabeche — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:33:05 -0800

I read in the paper that some burger contain poo. This sentence is miraculous; I find that I can read it aloud in any voice or accent and it just keeps getting funnier. Seriously, I want everyone here to spend ten minutes doing this and we're all gonna have a great day.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:34:06 -0800

You claim that "millions of people enjoy eating your food every day". Do you have PROOF that they ENJOY eating it? Could it not be a case of peer pressure and personal blackmail? I heard that somebody left half a McNugget and Ronald McDonald KILLED THEIR ENTIRE FAMILY. Did this happen? McDonald’s likes to think that its customers are able to make their own choices, and would not visit McDonald’s purely because of the reasons you state. And no, Ronald McDonald has never killed anyone.

By: probablysteve

probablysteve — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:36:36 -0800

My surname is McObessidy and I would like to open a hamburger restaurant (well, more of a stand really) under my name in my remote Scottish village. Is it okay? I heard that you are big on copyright. I have not laughed this hard in months.

By: WPW

WPW — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:36:54 -0800

the Spurlock McGurgles This one made me laugh so much, tears came to my eyes. I haven't laughed like hat in a while. Thanks gurple.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:37:20 -0800

There were no Kelis references in the Milkshake section. Yet. The Make Up Your Own Mind team will endeavour to answer my question as to whether or not Kelis' milkshake is from McDonald's within two weeks, and I will be sent an email when my answer is live on the site.

By: klue

klue — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:48:44 -0800

McDonald’s has no idea how many burgers you can make from one cow

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:51:54 -0800

do you think macdonalds shoulds be banned No, McDonald’s doesn’t think so.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:53:11 -0800

Six complete evasions of questions about the ethics of advertising McDonald's food to kids.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:53:15 -0800

I love McFlurry, but whenever I eat it, my skin turns red and chapped, my mouth stings and I have difficulty breathing. The problem seems to be getting worse. Should I continue eat it in the hope that I might harden myself, or is there some other explanation? Do you put poison in McFlurry? There is absolutely no poison in the McFlurries. If you are having some particular kind of reaction when you eat a McFlurry, then it would be advisable you discontinue purchasing and eating them immediately, and speak to your doctor about the symptoms you are having.

By: Verdandi

Verdandi — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:58:59 -0800

what part of the cow do you use in the burgers cos i heard it was the teeth. This post made my day great.

By: thanotopsis

thanotopsis — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:03:38 -0800

While these folks are quick to claim that their fries are 100% vegetarian, the articles that I read at the time this fiasco surfaced claimed the same thing: McDonald's never seasoned their fries with "beef essence", but that said seasoning had taken place at 3rd party facilities where the potatoes were originally cut and frozen for shipping to the McDonald's stores. So, I can't see that the fries questions actually answer my family's fears over eating at McDonald's again. I personally love the place, but I'm a meat eater, and they aren't.

By: Totally Zanzibarin' Ya

Totally Zanzibarin' Ya — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:24:42 -0800

are big macs big? Yes! This site is funny.

By: Space Kitty

Space Kitty — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:32:17 -0800

I'm not even halfway through this thread and between 'two beef of these patties' and 'Spurlock McGurgles' I'm in hysterics. Thanks, East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94!

By: Slarty Bartfast

Slarty Bartfast — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:34:00 -0800

It’s McDonald’s opinion that the Haggis Burger would have a very limited appeal. I have tears in my eyes, this is either the funniest FPP ever or the best viral marketing scheme ever.

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:40:04 -0800

HOW DO YOU GET THE KIDS VOUCHERS THAT ENABLE YOU 2 PICK UP A FREE SMALL DRINK WHEN YOU SHOW IT. 1. McDonald's is not familiar with this promotion. Individual restaurants do run their own promotions from time to time so it’s best to ask at the restaurant where you saw this offer. I'm going to have an aneurysm from laughter. Best medicine my ass.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:43:23 -0800

this is either the funniest FPP ever or the best viral marketing scheme ever. It's both! I dont eat meat but i love dipping my chips in the sauce on my boyfriends big tasty! Its delicious.

By: Debaser626

Debaser626 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:46:35 -0800

This is freakin' awesome. I have not laughed till I cried in years.... Thank you so much.... damo wins the internets.

By: Debaser626

Debaser626 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:48:22 -0800

oops... no insult to damo... but I meant East Manitoba...

By: goodnewsfortheinsane

goodnewsfortheinsane — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 10:50:52 -0800

Fantastic post. I couldn't resist: Name: Jules Email: jules@badmotherfucker.com Ask your question: You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in France?

By: atrazine

atrazine — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:05:37 -0800

Do your employees get health benefits? Firas, why would someone ask this of McDonalds UK?

By: teleskiving

teleskiving — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:06:41 -0800

do you SPIT in chips? No. This site is the funniest thing I have seen in weeks.

By: dios

dios — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:06:50 -0800

This is great. This is why I love Metafilter. I love all of you. My secretary now thinks I am insane. But it's worth it.

By: GuyZero

GuyZero — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:08:55 -0800

Seriously, who do they have answering these questions? They have nerves of steel for not answering every stupid question with "F off you twat". McDonalds question board admin, I salute you.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:11:11 -0800

Wait a minute, dios has a secretary?

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:11:57 -0800

Go take your ad hominems somewhere else, dios. I kid, of course. 1. McDonald’s staff are not invariably spotty – some have spots, some don’t.

By: probablysteve

probablysteve — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:20:55 -0800

my teacher said in a science lesson that when you kill the cows you tie their legs up and put them on a machine with high pressure water and literally burst the cow is that true

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:24:47 -0800

My God, if the numbers are right then they've answered like 60 more questions since I first looked at this. I'm NEVER going to get any work done at this rate. New favorites: I heard that Ronald Mc Donald is now more Hamburger than man, is this true? No. Ronald McDonald is a man, not a hamburger. I think McDonalds has an interesting role in society. I'm intersted in some of my observations particularly in Hong Kong but also elsewhere around the world: Did it ever occur to you that your staff are invariably very spotty. The implication is that it's MacDonalds food that causes this. I wonder if anyone ever observed this within your organistation? McDonald’s staff are not invariably spotty – some have spots, some don’t. Many people, young as well as older people, suffer with spots, acne and other skin problems. This is not exclusive to people that work at McDonald’s - it happens to others in many different kinds of employment. Often, skin conditions are not related to diet. is it true you need to add a gerkin to your burgers so that it isnt classified as a desert? This is a bit of a myth. The gherkins are actually there as a signature ingredient of McDonald’s burgers, and have been part of McDonald’s sandwiches for decades for no other reason than taste.

By: gnomeloaf

gnomeloaf — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:33:59 -0800

Encyclopedia McBrown: Why did your staff urinate in the ovens at your restraunt on the M24? This is not true. McDonald’s kitchens do not have ovens nor does McDonald’s UK know of there being an M24. McDonald’s is very strict about its food safety and hygiene procedures and if McDonald’s receives any allegations about this sort of behaviour, these claims are fully investigated. There are many such stories that do the rounds and not one has ever been found to have any factual basis. Needless to say, if there was any truth in any such allegations, it would be a dismissible offence.

By: misha

misha — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:35:53 -0800

This goes down as an all-time favorite. I started laughing half-way through, and when someone asked me why, I couldn't even say "Spurlock McGurkles" until the third try. By the time I reached the end of the thread, my eyes were teary. I think they were covering for Ronald McDonald, though. He hangs out on park benches around small children and clams up when adults come around. And Mayor McCheese was definitely on the take, or else how did the Hamburglar get out of McPrison all the time? Thanks for the thread!

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:36:25 -0800

I cannot believe it. I just learned something. i notice on you tray liners that fanta isn't suitable for vegetarian's could you tell me what's in it that makes it unsuitable Fanta Orange contains a fish oil as a carrier for the orange colourings. It is, therefore, not classified as suitable for vegetarians. [Note to self: NEVER DRINK FANTA. IT IS FISH SODA.]

By: Helga-woo

Helga-woo — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:36:36 -0800

is it true you need to add a gerkin to your burgers so that it isnt classified as a desert? This is a bit of a myth. It's only a bit of a myth? Which bit is true then? I haven't laughed so much in ages!

By: dog food sugar

dog food sugar — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:40:11 -0800

Do Goths come to McDonalds? Yes. I love this fpp and everyone here!

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:46:28 -0800

is it not true that mcDonalds stopped selling the rootbeer which was so nice cos it had ingredients like chemicals which was used on the soldiers in vietnam to make them fight and keep them awake. my freind said its true and read it on a website. thansk danny No, this is not true. Root Beer has been off the menu for some time now, and was removed as it proved unpopular with customers in the UK.

By: hifiparasol

hifiparasol — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:47:13 -0800

I heard that Ronald Mc Donald is now more Hamburger than man, is this true? OK, lynnster, you're cleaning up the partially chewed pretzels from my computer screen. Holy shit this is a funny thread. It's the sort of thread that would make me join if I weren't a member.

By: hifiparasol

hifiparasol — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:48:34 -0800

MetaFilter: Now More Hamburger Than Man

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:49:02 -0800

is it true that there is paint in your chicken nugets? Definitely no paint. Chicken McNuggets are made from carefully boned white chicken breast meat, which is then coated in a specially seasoned batter.

By: gnomeloaf

gnomeloaf — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:49:25 -0800

By: chunking express

chunking express — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:49:35 -0800

I wish you could favorite a thread more than once.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:54:34 -0800

Is it true that Ronald McDonald is 19' tall, composed mostly of erectile tissue, and he believes the Pyrenees mountain range is his girlfriend? When he goes skydiving without a parachute, does he love the feel of crumbling masonry against his naked flesh? Thanks so much. Still waiting for a response to this one.

By: teleskiving

teleskiving — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:00:02 -0800

I just realized what this reminds me of: The Timewaster Letters.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:01:15 -0800

This is not true. McDonald’s kitchens do not have ovens nor does McDonald’s UK know of there being an M24. I LOVE this one.

By: stupidsexyFlanders

stupidsexyFlanders — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:02:36 -0800

A McDonald's chicken nugget is 56% corn, according to Michael Pollan's The Omnivore's Dilemma. I have enquired about this.

By: hifiparasol

hifiparasol — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:03:56 -0800

Why do none of your emplyees talk english? rubbish about the local area depends its a load of parp Wasn't there recently some AskMe thread about irony?

By: probablysteve

probablysteve — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:06:18 -0800

what is ronald macdonalds favourite meal? Ronald McDonald doesn’t have a specific favourite meal as he likes to eat lots of different types of food. Ronald knows the importance of a balanced diet and makes good food choices across a range of foods to make sure that he stays fit and active. why is RONALD MCDONALD such a SINISTER character for McDonalds! McDonald’s doesn’t think Ronald is sinister! In fact, Ronald is McDonald's Chief Happiness Officer and has been the face of the company since 1963. He is a recognised character around the world, and advocates both a balanced diet and the importance of an active lifestyle.

By: DU

DU — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:10:13 -0800

Kirk: Ronnie, I need more happiness! Ronnie, down in the Happy Room: Cap'n, I'm givin' her all she's got!

By: hifiparasol

hifiparasol — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:13:06 -0800

My contribution: I heard the Hamburglar was indicted on 223 counts of Aggravated Hamburglary and was sentenced to 15 years in a federal prison. Now he tours the US and Canada on the lecture circuit, speaking out against prison rape, but nobody attends the lectures because all he ever says is "robble robble robble." Is this true?

By: dog food sugar

dog food sugar — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:17:08 -0800

hifiparasol did they answer that question? How do you answer that question?! This is all too funny.

By: designbot

designbot — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:17:30 -0800

I just realized what this reminds me of: The Timewaster Letters. See also: Letters From A Nut

By: malthas

malthas — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:26:56 -0800

This is seriously the best post ever, and absolutely why I joined Metafilter. Thank you, EMRJKC'94!

By: hifiparasol

hifiparasol — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:29:40 -0800

Still waiting for an answer, dog food sugar. why do you allow merciless killings of millions of animals? how can anyone associated with mcdonalds sleep at night? I sort of hope this person is eaten by a lion.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:37:55 -0800

is it true you use uranium in your chilli sauce? No.

By: serazin

serazin — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:42:51 -0800

This is fucking amazing.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:56:24 -0800

Why have you stopped chocolate donuts in the UK, its a stupid idea, im so angry. Everyone loved them including me McDonald’s still has the Chocolate Donut on the menu.

By: gurple

gurple — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:09:07 -0800

What were the chicken nuggests made before they became "100% pure chicken" ... my childhood is at steak.

By: tristeza

tristeza — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:09:33 -0800

I wonder if anyone will ask if they put anything other than beef in their burgers.

By: MythMaker

MythMaker — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:35:35 -0800

I love how whoever has the misfortune of answering these questions tries so hard to answer them all so seriously. So funny!

By: churl

churl — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 14:11:58 -0800

Good use of the "cowshitinsane" tag.

By: subaruwrx

subaruwrx — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 14:50:37 -0800

do people spit in my big mac? 1. No.

By: subaruwrx

subaruwrx — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 14:51:02 -0800

My absolute favorite... do you think macdonalds shoulds be banned 1. No, McDonald’s doesn’t think so.

By: A189Nut

A189Nut — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 14:54:09 -0800

Congrats on giving them your email address

By: smackfu

smackfu — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 15:04:36 -0800

Oh no! I might get spam! On the INTERNET!

By: John Kenneth Fisher

John Kenneth Fisher — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 15:06:38 -0800

Oh no! I might get spam! On the INTERNET! Well played, sir. Well played.

By: punchdrunkhistory

punchdrunkhistory — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 15:27:38 -0800

I heard that your milkshake was made from chicken hooves, is this true? I know the rumors about the nuggets being all beaks and feet and burgers being filled out with chicken are no longer true but I can't believe the milkshake is also chicken enriched! 1. Chicken hooves! No, there are definitely no chicken hooves in the milkshakes, or any other chicken parts for that matter.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 15:57:03 -0800

So, apparently in Australia, they also have a site. In general, not as interesting, except that apparently their Heart Foundation has a program to identify healthy foods that McDonald's participates in. The name of this program: "Pick the Tick". Ick!

By: dersins

dersins — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 16:31:15 -0800

My question for them: Is it true that your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard? If so, why? Do you use some sort of boy-bringing chemical ingredient in your milkshake, or is it something about the nature of boys? Or possibly the nature of the yard?

By: sswiller

sswiller — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 17:58:23 -0800

This is fascinating. I once have a chicken mcnugget and when i bite into it it there was somethink like gristle and the same applied the other 3 mcnuggets i ate as well Can you explain why this happened?

McDonald’s is sorry to hear that you didn’t enjoy your Chicken McNuggets. McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets are made from carefully deboned chicken breast meat and you should not find gristle in them. If you are ever unhappy with your food, please speak to your restaurant manager and they will be happy to look into the issue and replace your order. Alternatively, please give the Customer Services Team a call on 08705 244 622 so that this can be fully investigated.

By: sswiller

sswiller — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 18:02:36 -0800

Research into bacon has occurred over the last few years...

How bout quoting some sources, buddy?

By: AaronRaphael

AaronRaphael — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 18:58:06 -0800

Tonight we out for big game! We hittin' the official Burger King Chat Zone!

By: jack_mo

jack_mo — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 19:16:10 -0800

Fantastic. I'm forwarding the link to the McDonald's Workers Resistance.

By: jack_mo

jack_mo — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 19:20:48 -0800

Some are sort of poignant: 1. Would you be able to make a burger for babies. i would be interested if you could make a burger made from baby food? I am 14 but my teeth have not properly developed so a soft burger would be nice. Thank Robert Rothon ...although we are sorry to hear about your teeth difficulties, the company has no plans to produce any baby food products.

By: MrLint

MrLint — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 19:33:44 -0800

Fanta Orange contains a fish oil as a carrier for the orange colourings. It is, therefore, not classified as suitable for vegetarians. This sounds much like how some orthodox jews will not drink store milk as it contains vitamin D made from pig. However has with any pure chemical, it does not carry some kind of 'essence' from its source. Anything else is psychological.

By: saladpants

saladpants — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 20:03:22 -0800

Reading this thread was by far the best way I could possibly spend this evening.

By: phrontist

phrontist — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 21:02:36 -0800

I can get "small" meals, "medium" ones, "large" ones, and "supersize" ones. How about "super duper mega" size? McDonald’s currently has no plans to introduce a Super Duper Mega Value Meal. And, within the UK, McDonald’s does not serve the Supersize meals either.

By: dirigibleman

dirigibleman — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 21:18:29 -0800

You can do research on bacon?! All this time, I've been doing astrophysics like a sucker when I could have been doing baconology...

By: BrodieShadeTree

BrodieShadeTree — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 23:09:00 -0800

Mine: " I CAN HAS CHEEZEBURGER?!"

By: PercussivePaul

PercussivePaul — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 02:23:52 -0800

What is the yellowy coloured sauce in cheeseburgers please? 1. The yellow sauce on the Cheeseburger is mustard.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 02:24:03 -0800

McDonald's does not, and never has, funded the IRA. This story is based on an old urban myth that dates back to the 1970's when McDonald's first opened up shop in the UK. The payslips used for UK staff at that time were imported from the USA, and included printed reference to the American equivalent to NI pension contributions - the 'Individual Retirement Account' - or 'IRA' for short. The rumour that McDonald's donated to the IRA terrorist group arises from this misunderstanding. This is partially true - whilst not specifically a donation McDonalds did in fact pay protection money to the IRA for a number of years in the 1980s and 1990s. The misunderstanding is correct (viz. the IRA = Individual Retirement Account) but to say that McDonalds and many other large companies did not in some way add to the IRA's funding at some point is not exactly true.

By: pracowity

pracowity — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 07:35:21 -0800

McDonalds did in fact pay protection money to the IRA for a number of years in the 1980s and 1990s Where did you hear that?

By: Slarty Bartfast

Slarty Bartfast — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 10:59:15 -0800

Where did you hear that? All McDonald's hamburgers are made of beef. Nothing else. Just 100 percent beef, made from whole cuts of forequarter and flank (the same as a good mince you'd buy in the supermarket). All McDonald's adds is a pinch of salt and pepper after cooking.

By: LiliaNic

LiliaNic — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 11:41:14 -0800

The questions on that site are so hilarious that I can't even read them at work. Ditto for this thread. Will return.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 15:57:47 -0800

'Twas from a friend who worked in the security services. He was only 50% beef. The other 50% was made up of semen, lips, teeth etc.

By: StrikeTheViol

StrikeTheViol — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 17:41:37 -0800

I can't believe this isn't on the sidebar yet...I literally had to stop looking for a little while to save my ribs.

By: rob511

rob511 — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 21:27:04 -0800

Notice how all the answers refer to Golden Arches in the third person? It dawned on me: The retirement employment service for Congress, formerly run by Pfizer, has been outsourced to the UK.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 23:26:36 -0800

This thread needs to be made into a movie.

By: spinturtle

spinturtle — Sun, 17 Jun 2007 19:57:16 -0800

why did you refuse to change the lids on your mcflurries despite 100s of hedgehogs getting trapped and killed? for really? hedgehogs?

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Sun, 17 Jun 2007 21:59:03 -0800

The Quality Scouts are members of the public who are reporting back on their visits to McDonald’s farms and factories It's made of people! Oh Noes!

By: zarq

zarq — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 08:24:16 -0800

Best. Post. Ever. Thanks for this, East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94. I laughed my head off all weekend. :D

By: misha

misha — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 14:45:37 -0800

what is the critical analysis of George Ritzer’s theories concerning ‘Macdonaldisation’, discussing whether it remains useful as a contemporary relevance cultural critique of rationalisation. and to what extent to which Ritzer develops the work of Max Weber in your answers. ...If you would like to find out more about the McDonald's business in order to answer the question here for your college paper, please request a Student Information Pack... pwned. Hope this thread goes up on the sidebar.

By: misha

misha — Wed, 20 Jun 2007 20:52:16 -0800

so reports tell me you tend to use grade 'E' meat in bergers and nuggets ect... should i be eating dog food at grade 'D' instead for fast food? make sence to me, better quality. I heard you use mudkips in your beef burgers. Is this true and if you do do you like it? Semen seems to be a huge concern... is it true that in a branch in Kent someone got food poisoning and when the food sample was analysed it contained 5 different types of SEMEN?? What is the average semen content of a big mac? Is it true that at one of your branches in Devon, uk - a customer got herpes on his mouth. When the source was traced, inspectors found 8 semen samples in the mayonnaise of the local Mcdonald's...? Why was the Macdonalds in Edgware Closed down? i Heard a rumor that it was because someone masturbated in one of the burgers. is this True?

By: misha

misha — Wed, 20 Jun 2007 21:13:20 -0800

What measures have you put in place in your restaurants to prevent another case of Russian spies poisoning your sushi with radioactive contaminants? someone stop me, please

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Thu, 21 Jun 2007 12:50:21 -0800

HOLY CRAP! I didn't see that mudkips question! I actually asked whether they used charmanders in their burgers! Developmentally disabled minds think alike, I suppose.

By: misha

misha — Mon, 09 Jul 2007 15:09:20 -0800

update: I'm impressed that you've posted some of the questions asked here, and I think that they show the British public in worse light than they do your company (I'm a Yank). How on Earth can you keep a straight face long enough to write the responses? I've been laughing continuously for 48 hours about the shakes being made from dogs' lips. 1. McDonald's is pleased to hear that it brightened your day! The website has been designed so that anyone and everyone can ask any reasonable question they want - from the sublime to the seemingly ridiculous - and all will be answered with the same interest and commitment. (June 2007)