Comments on: The proletariat will rise. And then go away.

The proletariat will rise. And then go away.

Alex404 — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 16:53:45 -0800

Gunman bursts into party, tastes cheese and wine, gets hug, then leaves.

By: Alex404

Alex404 — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 16:54:11 -0800

I tried to think of a wittier link title, but MSNBC's stole the show.

By: darksasami

darksasami — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 16:58:51 -0800

Very Jean Valjean. Or Callahan.

By: ORthey

ORthey — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 16:59:40 -0800

There is a place on the internet called The Beb, that this is truly West of.

By: ORthey

ORthey — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 16:59:46 -0800

(what?)

By: googly

googly — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:03:07 -0800

He couldn't manage to steal a kiss? Lame.

By: ericb

ericb — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:03:13 -0800

Thank God, it wasn't "Eats, Shoots and Leaves."

By: motty

motty — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:03:41 -0800

I wonder if he was stoned on weed and when the people were unexpectedly nice to him was simply unable not to be nice back.

By: nasreddin

nasreddin — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:06:02 -0800

I am pretty sure that Buñuel made a movie about this.

By: Hicksu

Hicksu — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:06:07 -0800

Curses! ericb. The first thing I asked myself was if the robber was a panda.

By: IronLizard

IronLizard — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:06:33 -0800

I need to get some of that wine.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:11:47 -0800

I wonder if they're just those kind of people--like, they were all so at ease and enjoying themselves and happy to begin with, and offering the wine was a masterstroke and not the usual or expected reaction to a gun to a kid's head, which totally put the guy off his stride anyway, so he figured what the hell?

By: landedjentry

landedjentry — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:15:25 -0800

Hah, saw this on the Metro section of the Post today on my way to work. Great story. I wonder how many people would shoot if potential victims responded unexpectedly to their threats like that. Fear is such an encoded response it must've completely boggled the guy, sober or not.

By: churl

churl — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:18:24 -0800

Reminds me a little bit of a story I read in Adbusters' letters section, years ago. I'm having a little trouble remembering the details, but I remember the jist of it. An older man was walking through Chicago late at night and was held up by a young black man with a handgun. The frightened older man had only a few dollars in his wallet, but offered to walk to his ATM with his mugger to get more. On the way there, his young mugger began crying and apologizing, saying he was only trying to feed his wife and child and hadn't been able to make money any other way. They got to the ATM and the older man made the maximum $300 withdrawal and gave it to the young man. The young man gave him his gun. On his way home, the older man threw it in the Chicago River.

By: rob511

rob511 — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:18:32 -0800

Don't know if the robber was a grammarian, ericb, but since "jumbo shrimp" and "Camembert cheese" was being served, perhaps he was a fan of oxymoronic and redundant victuals.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:20:16 -0800

love that story too, churl. (you have to be a really good judge of character and instant assessment to get away with this kind of thing tho, i think--or totally unafraid of death or something)

By: flapjax at midnite

flapjax at midnite — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:22:31 -0800

Just goes to show: if you're having guests over, don't scrimp on the wine and cheese! Get the very best you can afford! Your guests (and any shotgun-toting hooded Germans who may also happen to show up) will appreciate it.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:26:30 -0800

Hmmm. My two buck Chuck would've probably gotten me killed.

By: trip and a half

trip and a half — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:28:17 -0800

Germans?

By: tkchrist

tkchrist — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:29:41 -0800

"There was this degree of disbelief and terror at the same time," Rabdau said. "Then it miraculously just changed. His whole emotional tone turned — like, we're one big happy family now. I thought: Was it the wine? Was it the cheese?" Was it the meth?

By: CCBC

CCBC — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:30:24 -0800

"Damn! That's good wine!" Yeah, Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry. I got to get me some of that shit.

By: wendell

wendell — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:31:30 -0800

Nobody's mentioned that Fark had this story @ 12:20PM?

By: Drexen

Drexen — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:34:08 -0800

"We were just finishing dinner," Cristina "Cha Cha" Rowan, 43, blurted out. "Why don't you have a glass of wine with us?" Given he was in the zone and ready to blow a kid's head off in the interests of robbery, hearing that must have pushed some kind of hard reset switch in the guy's mind, sending him back into a beneficient, pre-lapsarian bonhomie.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:34:39 -0800

I like the stoner theory, but I'm more ready to believe that it was someone who was fairly new to the whole 'robbing people at gunpoint' and was scared shitless. When someone did something that violated the well established movie script that he was following in his head, it became easier to just abort. Or maybe he had no intention of harming anyone, he just really was craving some cheese. I mean, we've all been there, right?

By: HuronBob

HuronBob — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:47:01 -0800

/opens a bottle... just in case... We always need a reason to have an open bottle of good wine... now I've got mine... thanks!

By: Roger Dodger

Roger Dodger — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:50:17 -0800

Um... hello? Who are these investigators and why doesn't this ring true? They also dusted for fingerprints — so far, to no avail. In the alley behind the home, investigators found the intruder's empty crystal wine glass on the ground, unbroken. Were they holding the glass for him?

By: flapjax at midnite

flapjax at midnite — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:50:59 -0800

Germans? Uh, sorry, that was supposed to be "gunmen". I guess I was thinking about Germans. How utterly odd. Senility creeping in? No. No. Can't be...

By: JeNeSaisQuoi

JeNeSaisQuoi — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:53:56 -0800

This story begs the question: is there any problem alcohol cannot solve?

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:00:30 -0800

I read it as German too, flapjax. It just seems like the kind of thing they would do.

By: NotMyselfRightNow

NotMyselfRightNow — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:08:02 -0800

An elderly friend of my parents woke up in the middle of the night a few years ago when they heard a crash downstairs. Leaving the lights off, she quietly walked downstairs and realized that someone was in her living room, robbing the house. She turned on the light, and he whipped around to look at her. She said, very softly, but sternly, "I'm disappointed in you." The man waited a moment, put down everything he had taken, said, "I am, too," and walked out of the house empty handed.

By: eriko

eriko — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:12:51 -0800

God damn liberals! I'm just waiting for some armed criminal to run into one of their houses! What the hell are they going to do? Defend themselves with wine and cheese? "C'mon robber, how about a group hug?" Like that will *ever* work!

By: Skygazer

Skygazer — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:16:01 -0800

Maybe we can air drop a few hundred thousand cases of Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry in Baghdad and Gaza and the warizstan area of Pakistan. Can't hurt...

By: ericb

ericb — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:22:08 -0800

Hmmm. My two buck Chuck would've probably gotten me killed. Maybe not, miss lynnster! Just yesterday -- California's Wine Surprise -- Trader Joe's 'Two Buck Chuck' Named Best Chardonnay at Prestigious State Fair!

By: Alex404

Alex404 — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:22:28 -0800

Maybe we can air drop a few hundred thousand cases of Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry in Baghdad and Gaza and the warizstan area of Pakistan. Can't hurt... That's fucking brilliant! I'd love to see what the local Muslims would think after we oh so thoughtful (and completely ignorant) Americans carpeted them with alcohol.

By: IronLizard

IronLizard — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:25:47 -0800

Well, with any luck they would drink it. Or we could come up with an aerosolized form.

By: geos

geos — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:26:17 -0800

Maybe we can air drop a few hundred thousand cases of Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry in Baghdad and Gaza and the warizstan area of Pakistan. Can't hurt... Ummmm... no...did you just graduate from the George W. Bush school of diplomacy?

By: JHarris

JHarris — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:39:51 -0800

Cool story churl, although I think in the end it only adds to the escalating spiral of fish-on-fish violence.

By: kimota

kimota — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:42:03 -0800

My first thought was, are they sure he wasn't a ghost?

By: lekvar

lekvar — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 18:56:05 -0800

Hello, officer. This open bottle of wine? Strictly for self-defense. You can never be too careful.

By: Skygazer

Skygazer — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 20:23:55 -0800

That's fucking brilliant! I'd love to see what the local Muslims would think after we oh so thoughtful (and completely ignorant) Americans carpeted them with alcohol. We can say it is distilled from the blood of Jews. Ummmm... no...did you just graduate from the George W. Bush school of diplomacy? George W. Bush School of diplomacy? HA HA. Teh awesome funny. Anyhow, be it culturally insensitive I still think it would beat dropping bombs.

By: blacklite

blacklite — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 21:06:05 -0800

I feel like this worked because you're generally going to be pretty alone and desperate to turn to waving guns around and robbing people. There have been times where I've wanted some kind of human contact so severely that, if someone had told me that all I had to do was wave a gun around to get a hug, I probably would have given it a lot of thought.

By: dhartung

dhartung — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 22:09:10 -0800

churl: I know that story, too, but I didn't read it in Adbusters. I think it was a Chicago Trib or Sun-Times columnist, or a story that a Chicago columnist published. As you can imagine, it's probably almost impossible to Google.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 22:14:46 -0800

it would beat dropping bombs Ever been clocked in the head by a bottle? Ever seen a bottle of vintage Clos du Mesnil explode? Ever eaten a crepes suzette? Dropping alcohol on Iraq would be an unholy act of savagery!

By: nixerman

nixerman — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 22:19:11 -0800

Yeah, he was probably just really, really lonely. Money isn't everything even for mindless, bloodthirsty criminals (tm). "Cha Cha" certainly deserves an award for such generosity. I'm not sure I would've offered the gunman a glass of the good stuff.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 22:38:17 -0800

Ever been clocked in the head by a bottle? Yes. Ever seen a bottle of vintage Clos du Mesnil explode? No. Gimme a minute.... Ok, yes. Ever eaten a crepes suzette? Maybe. I don't know what her name was, but I think the last name sounds right. Dropping alcohol on Iraq would be an unholy act of savagery! Perhaps. But only insofar as providing booze in bulk doesn't actually encourage drinking. Ensuring that there is huge amounts of alcohol in-country, and that it's verboten, though the police might 'turn a blind eye to speakeasies', is the best way to use booze as a weapon. I mean, let's just take the U.S. prohibition and make it work for us overseas. Next, will give them swing! (and if the idea of someone in a full burka swing-dancing doesn't make you smile, you are a cold SOB)

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 23:56:04 -0800

The real hero here was the Camembert, and it's time someone said so.

By: Uther Bentrazor

Uther Bentrazor — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 00:29:53 -0800

All you need is love.

By: From Bklyn

From Bklyn — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 03:17:17 -0800

And another glass of wine. And some smelly camembert.

By: bwg

bwg — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 04:27:25 -0800

A friend of mine was mugged for his wallet. When he asked the mugger what he needed the money for, the mugger told him booze. So he offered to buy the mugger a bottle if he'd let him keep his wallet. The mugger agreed, put away his weapon, and a bottle was purchased from the closest liquor store. The moral of the story is: muggers like booze.

By: public

public — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 04:40:13 -0800

Chateau Malescot St-Exupéry-blue?

By: Kikkoman

Kikkoman — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 06:05:12 -0800

Just for once, it would be nice if a gunman burst out of a party and got a hug.

By: odinsdream

odinsdream — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 07:53:35 -0800

"The only good thing is they would be able to identify him because they hugged him." Or, you know, that nobody was shot. That's pretty good, too.

By: Skygazer

Skygazer — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 08:24:22 -0800

Sommeliers everywhere are smiling.

By: Skygazer

Skygazer — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 08:34:09 -0800

Happiness is a Warm....

By: Partial Law

Partial Law — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 09:38:51 -0800

Only in California could the phrase Prestigious State Fair not cause all within earshot to burst out laughing.

By: churl

churl — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 18:22:57 -0800

> As you can imagine, it's probably almost impossible to Google. As I can attest, in fact.

By: Geezum Crowe

Geezum Crowe — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 09:03:35 -0800

I read it in the Guardian on Saturday but I thought it was a wine company's advertorial. He drank the glass and said "Damned, that's good wine," and it was!