Carey on
July 24, 2007 9:35 AM Subscribe

Drew Carey - coming on down. Drew Carey announced on Letterman last night that he will be the next host of The Price Is Right. Begin crafting your "Florida Loves Drew" shirts now.
posted by daedsiluap (121 comments total)

What a sad decline of the man's career.
posted by LarryC at 9:39 AM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Carey's Cuties? Or will they retire that whole aspect of the show?
posted by Burhanistan at 9:40 AM on July 24, 2007

What a sad decline of the man's career.

Huh? Happily having what is a potentially life-long job guarantee as the host of one of the most popular game shows in America? What do you want out of him, voiceovers?
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 9:42 AM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

It's a decline, maybe. But he's set for life now. It's like a burnout haven for TV hosts.
posted by boo_radley at 9:42 AM on July 24, 2007

I'll watch if Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood come with him.
posted by Faint of Butt at 9:42 AM on July 24, 2007 [8 favorites]

DECLINE?!?!? For Drew CAREY??? He sucks. If anything, it's a decline for The Price is Right.
posted by banished at 9:45 AM on July 24, 2007 [5 favorites]

Oh, yeah. You might think this is bad, but think about Wayne Brady. Dude hosts the worst game show ever. He's about three steps from eating I bullet, I bet.
posted by boo_radley at 9:46 AM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

What a sad decline of the man's career.

You might think this is bad, but think about Wayne Brady.

Yeah -- and both of them are laughing all the way to the bank.
posted by blucevalo at 9:50 AM on July 24, 2007

"This could work out, but you know, you'd have to be drunk all the time."
posted by ikebowen at 9:51 AM on July 24, 2007

I dunno...I kind of like the idea of a smart-ass host bringing a bit of sarcasm and laughs to the show. Time will tell I guess, but I think it may be a good choice.
posted by Shfishp at 9:51 AM on July 24, 2007

Drew's OK. He has the right manner for a game show, friendly, self-effacing and laconic. Thank God it wasn't Rosie O'Donnel.
posted by jonmc at 9:52 AM on July 24, 2007

Oh, yeah. You might think this is bad, but think about Wayne Brady. Dude hosts the worst game show ever. He's about three steps from eating I bullet, I bet.

The suits just don't know what to do with him. A little reformatting and a minor title tweak -- to "Is Wayne Brady Gonna Have to Choke a Bitch?" -- and suddenly you've got America's most beloved program.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:53 AM on July 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

I used to love the Drew Carey Show, but:

a) the funny never really seemed to come from Carey himself, he just stood there grinning

b) the show got WAY too self-indulgent
posted by DU at 9:54 AM on July 24, 2007

Just adding- I'm really struggling to figure out how hosting a game show is a "shameful" career for a professional entertainer. I could understand saying that a Hollywood acrtress, etc. making tens of millions per picture or a Nobel Laureate suddenly deciding they want to be the upper right square for the block a career lowlight, but stand-up comedians? 95% of them are lucky to get a regular gig at a shithole club on the corner of Fuck Let's Never Live Here and Oh, So That's Where You Buy Crack. I went to a club a few years back where the most hilarious comedian was this talented, funny guy named Godfrey. His "big break" was getting to be "The 7-Up Guy" for a year. That was success for this industry, and he was one of the talented guys.

Carey's getting a TV show that will never be canceled and will easily be more remembered and iconic than the sitcom he had on ABC.

Much like Howie Mandel, that lucky bastard, Carey's job- for which he will be paid, likely a lot- will be to be pretty much adored by millions of people for hanging around beautiful women and handing people lots of money. My god, if that's a decline what hole can I crawl into for a chance at that?
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 9:55 AM on July 24, 2007 [34 favorites]

95% of them are lucky to get a regular gig at a shithole club on the corner of Fuck Let's Never Live Here and Oh, So That's Where You Buy Crack

I have to admit, that made me laugh out loud. Considered changing careers?

Much like Howie Mandel, that lucky bastard,

Compared to Howie, Drew Carey is Lenny Bruce. At least Drew's funny. Howie's main talent seems to be looking more and more like a damn genie.
posted by jonmc at 9:57 AM on July 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

Just adding- I'm really struggling to figure out how hosting a game show is a "shameful" career for a professional entertainer.

The people saying that belive in that tired old myth called 'artistic purity.'
posted by jonmc at 9:58 AM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Uhm, folks, last time I was in a casino there was a very prominent Drew Carey slot machine. I think this is upward momentum.
posted by Stan Chin at 9:59 AM on July 24, 2007

People saying this is a decline are forgetting that:

* Stand-up is a grind and Carey is done with that.
* He's likely joining the show as both host and some kind of creative director role -- watch for changes in the show's content and format.
* After some initial set-up, the day-to-day of hosting the show will take about 20 hours a week, tops. Carey is still free to write books and scripts, develop other shows and hit the road doing stand-up, if he wants.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:00 AM on July 24, 2007

Yup, I don't really see the downside here. If Carey has a sick day, I'll step in.
posted by craven_morhead at 10:01 AM on July 24, 2007

I'm really struggling to figure out how hosting a game show is a "shameful" career for a professional entertainer.

Because success isn't measured in how impossible it will be for the network to get rid of you. Comedy is (supposed to be) an art. Telling that Mrs Steenhoek from Dubuque that her pearls look real nice and then grinning like a homunculus until the next commercial break is not considered artistic.
posted by DU at 10:01 AM on July 24, 2007

By the way, if you never read Dirty Jokes and Beer, it ends with some of the best short stories I've ever read. "Tackling Jim Brown" is great stuff.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:03 AM on July 24, 2007

Fuckin' A - I love Carey, and I think this is a brilliant choice.
posted by tristeza at 10:03 AM on July 24, 2007

Come on, couldn't we import Joe Pasquale, squeaky-voiced host of the UK version?
posted by Remy at 10:04 AM on July 24, 2007

I listened to the audiobook version of his autobiography; interesting stuff, including a full chapter on dick jokes. He's a funny guy, with an interesting history.
posted by inigo2 at 10:04 AM on July 24, 2007

I don't think asking a nominal artist to create something fresh once in a while is really "artistic purity". This is like praising Kafka for giving up writing to work on his insurance adjusting.
posted by DU at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2007

How does an homunculus grin?

Anyway, Carey is 49 years old and got an offer for a cushy, lucrative job. He will have chances to be funny, I'm sure. And if he really wants to, he can head down to Caroline's to tell dick jokes with the rest of the artists down there (disclaimer: I love stand-up, but come on, it's entertainment).
posted by Mister_A at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2007

I grew up watching Bob Barker and I have to say that Carey now has the Awesomest Job in America.
posted by Mikey-San at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2007

damn you Cool Papa Bell......
posted by inigo2 at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2007

A Drew Cary slot machine? Holy fucking hell. Going from pushing your own branded slot machine to hosting the Price is Right is like going from the dude from who mops out the glory hole rooms at a peep show in Flint Michigan to being the double sex president of the universe. Move over weezy, Drew is on some whole other movin' on up shit.
posted by Divine_Wino at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

Haha! i see there is a dick joke meme in the aether today.
posted by Mister_A at 10:06 AM on July 24, 2007

I don't fault Carey for taking it. But offering apologies that he'll still have chances to be funny in the interstices of his job only proves my point.
posted by DU at 10:07 AM on July 24, 2007

Because success isn't measured in how impossible it will be for the network to get rid of you. Comedy is (supposed to be) an art. Telling that Mrs Steenhoek from Dubuque that her pearls look real nice and then grinning like a homunculus until the next commercial break is not considered artistic.

You can't tell me Bob Barker wasn't a stand-up comedian who practiced an art form all on his own. Just watch any of his best moments, dealing with the hyperactive contestants, or the complete idiots who fuckup their way into lucking out and winning the car. How many new people do you meet every day? Barker had to meet at least a dozen new people- and deal with them, every day, for decades, without ignoring them or "getting the manager" as an option.

Comedy is just another form of performance art, and Carey, like Barker, is likely going to have to do much of that unscripted. That takes talent.

If anyone could do it, anyone would be offered the job. Carey can act- yes act- the part the way Barker did. I wouldn't see that applying to a stand-up comedian like, say, Gilbert Gottfried or Lewis Black, even though both are great in their own way. It's the same reason Ellen Degeneres has a successful talk show and Chevy Chase failed.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 10:10 AM on July 24, 2007

I wouldn't see that applying to a stand-up comedian like, say, Gilbert Gottfried

Gilbert Gottfried hosting a gameshow would be...interesting, to say the least.
posted by jonmc at 10:12 AM on July 24, 2007

I can see Drew Carey being a good host for this.

I'm completely distracted by this on the same page though:

Watch an animated Bob Barker reminisce about a time when a fan wearing a tube top gave her all to be on THE PRICE IS RIGHT.

It looks like they made an animation based on an audio recording of him talking about the time a woman popped out of her tube top as she ran down. It's actually not creepy the way the text makes it sound. It is kind of an odd addition to the page though.
posted by Tehanu at 10:13 AM on July 24, 2007

I wonder what his taglines going to be..."Don't forget to have your Clintons spade or newtered."
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:13 AM on July 24, 2007

But offering apologies that he'll still have chances to be funny in the interstices of his job only proves my point.

i agree ... he's abandoned the pure artistic quest of slot machine endorsement for the filthy lucre of the tv game show ... shame on him
posted by pyramid termite at 10:14 AM on July 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

Gilbert Gottfried hosting a gameshow would be...interesting, to say the least.

Actually, as soon as I hit post I realized Gottfried did a stint on Hollywood Squares. Now THAT is a decline.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 10:15 AM on July 24, 2007

grining like a homunculus.

That's a great image, but comedy as a an art form? Ever heard of starving artists? Whose Line was a great show, but it bit the dust. SNL and Mad are roller-coaster rides in terms of quality, up one year and down the next. Only The Daily Show and now The Colbert Report are true venues for comedy as an art form, and if you aren't a political comedian, neither one works for you. If you are lucky, you might get a three-minute stint on one of the late-night shows, and that doesn't pay the bills.

Richard Dawson became famous as the Family Feud host, and he was able to satirize himself in the Running Man movie. Between Hogan's Heroes and Family Feud, if he was working on being funny, I must have blinked and missed it. Game shows are the way to go for a comedian these days.

Just look at Howie Mandel. He gets to do more comedy now when the networks come to interview him on the phenomenal success of Deal or No Deal than he's done for years.

The only other comedians I can think of that are thriving perform at roasts for people they barely know or write books, like Foxworthy.
posted by misha at 10:17 AM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

As much as I hate the idea of inflicting Drew Carey on my elderly relatives now (the ones who actually watch PIR), the sooner he is placed into TV exile, the better.
I just never got the appeal.
posted by Thorzdad at 10:19 AM on July 24, 2007

Holy cow, contestants! Would you eat the moon if it were made out of spare ribs?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:19 AM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

Actually, as soon as I hit post I realized Gottfried did a stint on Hollywood Squares. Now THAT is a decline.

Dude, I was walking down lower Broadway once and he was 'interviewing' someone on the sidewalk. I could hear the crazy bastard two blocks away. I think his actual artistic peak was this.
posted by jonmc at 10:20 AM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

We were discussing this last night- he started out as a stand-up comic, yes? And yet, we couldn't think of any jokes he was known for (most comics have at least one famous routine- Seinfeld, Foxworthy, Rock).

From what I remember (from Just for Laughs re-runs) it was mostly a series of small jokes instead of larger routines. I don't think he ever had a comedy special longer than half an hour before he got his own show. He did get called over to Johnny's desk, which is worth something.

I think he'll do well with the Price is Right. You need to explain the rules, be happy and keep the show going when the contestant wants to stop and say hello to everyone back home. He also has that middle America charm a show needs when you're guessing the price of dish soap.
posted by Gary at 10:24 AM on July 24, 2007

Game shows are effing prolefeed.
posted by M.C. Lo-Carb! at 10:25 AM on July 24, 2007

jonmc writes "Most comedians who think of themselves as 'artists,' are about as funny as anal warts. Comedians as a rule, shouldn't take themselves seriously."

In my experience, only the very best, most serious (about their craft) comedians make it to the top, like Seinfeld, Cosby, Carlin, Pryor, Lenny Bruce, etc. The ones who don't care much work the stand-up circuit long enough to get some other job, and that's it for their stand-up career.
posted by krinklyfig at 10:25 AM on July 24, 2007

Drew Carey is perfect for a game show job because on TV, he's more of an onstage impresario or comedy lubricant than a comedian. On his sitcom and Whose Line and whatever thing he's hosting now (I've just seen a commercial), the laughs mainly come from his coworkers; Carey just orchestrates and provides a context for teh funny to occur.

Now personally, I'd have given the Price Is Right job to Bob Saget, but only if he worked blue.
posted by FelliniBlank at 10:26 AM on July 24, 2007

I've seen Drew's standup, he had a memorable joke, paraphrased:

So, now that I'm doing well, when it's raining, and I see a cop, I like to run red lights. When he pulls me over and asks me if I know why he's pulling me over, I reply, yeah, do you know why I ran the light? So you'd have to stand in the rain.
posted by nomisxid at 10:34 AM on July 24, 2007

Anyone who thinks that comedy and game shows don't go together obviously has not watched enough Match Game.

I used to like Drew Carey. Now I find him vaguely creepy.
posted by jrossi4r at 10:42 AM on July 24, 2007

You can't tell me Bob Barker wasn't a stand-up comedian who practiced an art form all on his own.

The make or break is gonna be if the machine lets him do his own thing. I have every confidence that Carey will bend over backward to do whatever the producers want -- if he was a boat rocker he wouldn't have gotten the gig. But if, a month in, he's being told back stage to "cut out the lame jokes and make with the nice small talk" or some such shit it's going to be hell for him, regardless. otoh, it could be great.

I wonder how many people in the biz would say he's "sold out"? Not many, I'd wager. First reaction, I'm thinking is "Holy god, what a lucky bastard."
posted by dreamsign at 10:43 AM on July 24, 2007

Now personally, I'd have given the Price Is Right job to Bob Saget, but only if he worked blue.

Now there's a great analogy. If Saget, with his twisted, sick, fantastic! sense of humour can do the Full House thing for years on end, I imagine Drew Carey of all people should be a-ok with The Price Is Right.
posted by dreamsign at 10:45 AM on July 24, 2007

Gilbert Gottfried hosting a gameshow would be...interesting, to say the least.

Oh, but he he has!* ;)

You Fool!

Okay, not really
posted by the other side at 10:46 AM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

Actually, as soon as I hit post I realized Gottfried did a stint on Hollywood Squares. Now THAT is a decline.

Bobcat Goldthwait, on his comedy cd "I Don't Mean to Insult You", recounts how he once got fired from Hollywood Squares. Is that above or below just appearing?
posted by inigo2 at 11:01 AM on July 24, 2007

I stage directed (which amounted to not doing much other than set some lights and do level checks) Carey back in er, '92 / '93 when he came to my tiny Northern WI college. 15 years later, Price is Right. Must be doing something right to go from one to the other is such a relatively short time.
posted by edgeways at 11:03 AM on July 24, 2007

What a decline for Metafilter.
posted by Sailormom at 11:11 AM on July 24, 2007

The Price is Right is the perfect game show model of competition libertarians love.
posted by Esoquo at 11:11 AM on July 24, 2007

The Price is Right is the perfect game show model of competition libertarians love.

Under the free market, wouldn't the highest bidder always have the correct price?
posted by Gary at 11:14 AM on July 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

Under the free market, wouldn't the highest bidder always have the correct price?

Nope. You'd be right if they were truly "bidding" - offering to pay for the item - but they aren't. A guess costs them nothing, so it doesn't represent a willingness to pay, and doesn't reflect a "real" market value.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:19 AM on July 24, 2007

Man, I saw a few episodes of The Good Life back in '94. Carey played sidekick to John Caponera, and all I could think was, get this guy his own show.

I can see not getting the appeal of Carey, either the man or his schtick, but his show was often brilliant not the least because of the excellent cast. Carey loves Midwestern cornfed Americans without the ugly chip-on-the-shoulder way that country music, or the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, do. His show was consistently one of the most queer-friendly things in prime time. And Carey certainly isn't the first comedian whose show didn't showcase him being "funny" -- look at Bob Newhart's entire career (or at least his two most successful TV shows).

Anyway, it's not for me, but TPIR is an institution. I'd wish him well, but it looks like I don't need to.
posted by dhartung at 11:26 AM on July 24, 2007

And Carey certainly isn't the first comedian whose show didn't showcase him being "funny" -- look at Bob Newhart's entire career (or at least his two most successful TV shows).

Loved the Bob Newhart show and hated Newhart, but I never lost the impression that the man was a bit of a mastermind, making the comedy work through his peers. Ok, scratch that. Not peers, for that very reason. More like comedic puppets (not meaning that in an unkind way).

I never got that impression with Carey but I suppose the man could be that smart. Still, you get Whose Line talent and you know they're coming up with a lot of that stuff on their own. (thinking Ryan Stiles on Carey; obviously on WLIIA they're doing their own thing) And yeah, poor Wayne Brady. Man.

Also, somebody kick that ass Greg Proops.
posted by dreamsign at 11:39 AM on July 24, 2007

Also, somebody kick that ass Greg Proops.

Amen. That guy is a smug little yuppie assmunch who wasn't hit enough as a child.
posted by jonmc at 11:47 AM on July 24, 2007

I used to like Drew Carey. Now I find him vaguely creepy.

Yeah, he seems like such a smug, vaguely-lecherous jackass. I think the only way this'll work is if they completely revamp the show a couple times, like when Leno took over for Carson.

I'm gonna miss Cliff Hangers and the Clock Game.
posted by 23skidoo at 11:48 AM on July 24, 2007

I used to love the Drew Carey Show, but the show got WAY too self-indulgent

A friend of a friend of mine played one of Drew's buddies on that show, and according to him, ABC wanted to cancel the show but they were contractually obligated to do another season. So then the whole cast and crew apparently got together, shot a whole season worth of shows, which all promptly got shelved.

Supposedly, all acknowledgement of reason went out with that shoot. Nobody would ever see them, so why wouldn't you just make the craziest, most batshit insane TV shows you could? I really hope they release them on DVD some day.
posted by fungible at 11:56 AM on July 24, 2007

Proof positive that Carey is not, never was, and never will be "edgy."
posted by Afroblanco at 12:00 PM on July 24, 2007

Supposedly, all acknowledgement of reason went out with that shoot. Nobody would ever see them, so why wouldn't you just make the craziest, most batshit insane TV shows you could? I really hope they release them on DVD some day.

Hell ya. Though that could be a great urban legend. And I'm not sure the reality, if it exists, can match the kind of things I'm imagining them doing now that you've told that story. ... naw, they'd top it. Didn't always (often?) like the show, but they definitely came off as a group that didn't care too much about the rules.
posted by dreamsign at 12:00 PM on July 24, 2007

Soooo...who's going to break the news to Drew Carey that TPIR isn't a British import?
posted by dhammond at 12:00 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Proof positive that Carey is not, never was, and never will be "edgy."

Not everything has to be.
posted by jonmc at 12:10 PM on July 24, 2007

Edgy, no. Even The Unreleased Tapes (duh duh duuuh) would probably be juvenile rather than edgy. Still, fun to watch I bet.
posted by dreamsign at 12:15 PM on July 24, 2007

Not everything has to be.

Wrong. Edgy is always better.

They should have gone with Anthony Bourdain as the new host. Changed the title to simply The Price. Contestants who lose or annoy him would be dunked in a shark tank or forced to tongue wrestle with Paula Deen. Now that would be a price!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:17 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Also, every single fucking comedian in Hollywood tried out for Price is Right, or tried to get an audition, so be careful who you accuse of selling out - it may have been your favorite "edgy artist".
posted by tristeza at 12:18 PM on July 24, 2007

Comedians doing game shows? Well, I never! How could that ever work?
posted by 1f2frfbf at 12:22 PM on July 24, 2007

this thread is so much different than the one on bigsoccer.com. less cynicism, more fanboy, please!
posted by acid freaking on the kitty at 12:24 PM on July 24, 2007

jonmc: "Compared to Howie, Drew Carey is Lenny Bruce."

It's sentences like these that make me realize how much Pop Culture there is. I thought I was hip, but this string of names that I essentially don't know at all totally confused me. I'm glad you followed it up with extra information for a parsing aide.

Compared to Shlomo Sternberg, Michel Hénon is Henri Poincare.
posted by Plutor at 12:25 PM on July 24, 2007

And I'm being pretty flexible with my use of the word "hip", here.
posted by Plutor at 12:25 PM on July 24, 2007

This will either be totally hysterical or it will totally suck.

Time will tell.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 12:27 PM on July 24, 2007

I thought I was hip, but this string of names that I essentially don't know at all totally confused me. I'm glad you followed it up with extra information for a parsing aide.

Plutor, Lenny Pruce was probably the most innovative stand-up comedian of all time (possible exception: Richard Pryor). Go on p2p and obtain his routines 'Dykes & Faggots,' and 'Lima, Ohio,' and prepare piss yourself laughing.

Drew Carey is an amusing genial guy who does the 'average shmoe' thing well. Howie Mandel is not worth bothering with.
posted by jonmc at 12:30 PM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

Lenny Bruce, dammit. With a 'B.'
posted by jonmc at 12:32 PM on July 24, 2007

Also, every single fucking comedian in Hollywood tried out for Price is Right, or tried to get an audition, so be careful who you accuse of selling out - it may have been your favorite "edgy artist".

*dreamy musical segue*

Sarah Silverberg: IF you guess the price within a hundred dollars, you win BOTH showcases. Also, Joe Franklin raped me.

*chaotic dissolve*

Uh, sorry. Lost me there for a second.
posted by dreamsign at 12:32 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

MAN, goddamnit. Silverman. Egads.
posted by dreamsign at 12:33 PM on July 24, 2007

Also, somebody kick that ass Greg Proops.

If I'm going to be kicking the ass of any WLIIA cast member, it'll be the guys who were responsible for that MC Rove thing.
posted by box at 12:44 PM on July 24, 2007

All I have to say is they cancelled Greg The Bunny.
posted by daq at 12:44 PM on July 24, 2007

Drey Carey belongs in the pantheon of enormously successful comics who aren't actually funny. Howie Mandel, Ellen DeGeneres, Bob Saget, Ray Romano. They're all in there. How the hell do they do it? Is it just good publicity, smoke and mirrors or what?

The supporting cast on the Drew Carey Show was, for the most part, hysterical and very talented, however
posted by psmealey at 12:47 PM on July 24, 2007

Also, Joe Franklin raped me.

He must've used a ladder.
posted by jonmc at 12:52 PM on July 24, 2007

NOBODY DISSES SHLOMO STERNBERG LIKE THAT!
* falls out of chair *
posted by boo_radley at 12:54 PM on July 24, 2007

psmealey: don't lump Drew & Ellen in with Ray Romano & Howie Mandel. Are they innovators or geniuses? No. Are they good for laughs? Sure, and pretty reliably.
posted by jonmc at 12:55 PM on July 24, 2007

I thought it should be someone younger who could do another 40 years Drew Carey won't be doing this at 89...

What about Sanjaya?!
posted by thilmony at 1:25 PM on July 24, 2007

Bob Saget

When he was in school he thought he was the "class clown." Only thing he didn't realize: people weren't laughing because he was funny. They were laughing at him for being such an asshole. Same as now.
posted by ericb at 1:34 PM on July 24, 2007

Eh, he has his moments.
posted by jonmc at 1:39 PM on July 24, 2007

Carey's on The Price is Right
Barker's gone into the night
Come on down and improvise
Don't you watch no more

Once I rose above the comedy circuit
Just to get on network TV and jerk it
I was TVQing ever higher
But I ran too long

Though my hands could write I still wasn't funny
But no one noticed and I kept making money
I can hear the critics when I'm dreaming
I can hear them say

Carey's on The Price is Right
Barker's gone into the night
Come on down and improvise
Don't you watch no more

Masquerading as a man with a punchline
I couldn't draw a crowd to open a lunchline
And if I claim to be a comic
It surely means that I'm washed up

From a stormy sea of tepid devotion
I jumped a shark that could have swallowed the ocean
I thought that I could use Mimi for flotation
But still I hear the critics say

Carey's on The Price is Right
Barker's gone into the night
Come on down and improvise
Don't you watch no more

No!

Carey's on
Cleveland's favorite wry slob
Carey's on
You will always miss Bob

Now your life's no longer empty
Surely Plinko waits for you

Carey's on The Price is Right
Barker's gone into the night
Come on down and improvise
Don't you watch no more
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:41 PM on July 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

I was never a big Drew Carey fan, but I'd much rather watch him do standup than that exercise in collective embarassment Who's Line or, god help us, host a game show. And there are plenty of other comedians for whom I could say basically the same thing: Rosie O'Donnell, Denis Leary, Bobcat Goldthwaite, Norm McDonald... the list just goes on and on. Even guys who fare well in short sketches (Dana Carvey, Phil Hartman, a hefty percentage of all SNL castmembers ever) tend to make some truly horrid movies and TV shows.

The problem - and this has bugged me for a long time now - is that no matter how good you are at stand-up, impressions, and other short, punchline centric forms, you can't be a major star and get the major bucks until you do movies or a TV series. You might do a damn good job of telling jokes, but unless you can convincingly play the father of three adorable children, interview an actress, or console a woman who didn't know that Albany was the capital of New York, your career is going to "stall." You're not going to "make it." And so every single talented comedian, sooner or later, gets promoted to his (or her) level of incompetence. Rodney Dangerfield - one of the most famous stand up comics of all time - ended up making some of the most god-awful movies of the last two decades. That was so sad. Why couldn't he just keep doing what he was good at?

If I'm one of the best sculptors in the country, I can have a decent career and be respected for my work and die happy. I don't have to, after fifteen years, make a leap to designing furniture.

All of this to say... why is a hosting gig on The Price is Right a step up from stand-up (or whatever Drew is doing these days)? I mean, seriously, have we decided that quantity trumps quality when it comes to time spent in front of a TV camera? I'm sure economics has a lot to do with this, but I don't believe it's an insurmountable obstacle in this day and age. Is it so unreasonable to think that the top stand-up or sketch comedians in the country could enjoy the same status as the top movie stars and musicians? That you could just have a really great career in that field and no more would be necessary?
posted by Clay201 at 1:41 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Comedy is (supposed to be) an art. Telling that Mrs Steenhoek from Dubuque that her pearls look real nice and then grinning like a homunculus until the next commercial break is not considered artistic.

Yep. Real artistes work at burger king.

People who can scare up two nickels to rub together are sell-outs.
posted by jason's_planet at 1:50 PM on July 24, 2007

psmealey writes "Drey Carey belongs in the pantheon of enormously successful comics who aren't actually funny. Howie Mandel, Ellen DeGeneres, Bob Saget, Ray Romano."

Ray Romano and Ellen DeGeneres are funny. Well, at least to me. Not my first choice, but hey ...

Saget has his moments, but he's mostly funny because people aren't expecting the dirty joke to come from that innocent face. He was great in The Aristocrats ...

Howie Mandel? Well ... I used to think he was funy, back when I was about 15 and first discovered getting stoned (back when it was hysterical all the time).
posted by krinklyfig at 1:50 PM on July 24, 2007

(Dana Carvey, Phil Hartman, a hefty percentage of all SNL castmembers ever) tend to make some truly horrid movies and TV shows.

Dana Carvey's standup is hysterical and Phil hartman's work on The Simpsons was brilliant.

Yep. Real artistes work at burger king.

Well, if none of my other prospects come through. What?
posted by jonmc at 1:53 PM on July 24, 2007

Clay201 writes "Is it so unreasonable to think that the top stand-up or sketch comedians in the country could enjoy the same status as the top movie stars and musicians?"

Maybe this is something he wants to do, not just a compromise. Who knows? He seems to be pretty good at the hosting thing.
posted by krinklyfig at 1:58 PM on July 24, 2007

psmealey: I can only assume you've never seen Ellen or Bob do stand up and are mistaking their white-bread TV personas for their stage ones. Or, you know, you have no sense of Hoo-man Hoo-mar.
posted by absalom at 1:59 PM on July 24, 2007

You know what really kills comedians? Disney and the huge movie franchises.

They find a popular comedian and then sign him up to a contract that guarantees him work for a few years, and he ends up starring in suckfests.

Look at Tim Allen: not just the Santa Clause sequels, but some stupid "let's hide with the Amish" movie with Kirstie Alley (also suffering from big movie contract disease for the "Look Who's Talking" series).

And Steve Carrell, who thank god will be in the Get Smart movie, gets stuck in Evan Almighty.
posted by misha at 2:11 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

And so every single talented comedian, sooner or later, gets promoted to his (or her) level of incompetence. Rodney Dangerfield - one of the most famous stand up comics of all time - ended up making some of the most god-awful movies of the last two decades. That was so sad. Why couldn't he just keep doing what he was good at?

Yes, it's possible to make a decent living and become famous by being a comedian, but you have to work like a maniac, travelling across the country nonstop for years and years. Not even Fugazi wants to be Fugazi anymore.
posted by 23skidoo at 2:31 PM on July 24, 2007

Rodney Dangerfield - one of the most famous stand up comics of all time - ended up making some of the most god-awful movies of the last two decades.

and even in the worst of them he was never less than amusing.
posted by jonmc at 2:37 PM on July 24, 2007

1f2frfbf : I preferred the fish when he went blue.

everybody else: Compared to Ludvig Wittgenstein, Drew Carey is Freidrich Neitzsche
posted by Sparx at 2:40 PM on July 24, 2007

and compared to spelling, I am lolcats
posted by Sparx at 2:46 PM on July 24, 2007

This is an interesting discussion, and I love the way it evolved from the first comment, which seemed like it was just tossed out there without a whole lot of thought. This is why I love Metafilter.

The thing about comedians, is that humor is subjective. Someone can be really funny, but if they aren't your cup of tea, oh well. It's rare for a comedian to have universal appeal. Cosby pops into my head immediately(recent loony-tunes behavior aside), not too many others. Even Seinfeld, who is arguably the most "successful" comedian ever, never really reached that level.

The skills gained as a standup comedian, however, can be judged objectively. Ability to connect with an audience. Insanely quick mental reflexes. Timing. Keeping cool under pressure. I would argue that most of the comedians mentioned in this thread, at some point proved themselves at standup. I once saw Sinbad perform standup in front of a crowd of about 2,000. I've never laughed that hard in my life. He had the entire audience eating out of his hand from the moment he stepped on stage. Afterwards it occured to me that I had just spent 90 minutes of my life laughing at the unfunniest jokes I'd ever heard. Andrew Dice Clay, as abhorrent as his comedy is to most, is a master at the art of standup. I've never seen Drew Carey live, but from everything else I've seen him do, I can imagine that he's probably pretty good.

As with any endeavor, especially creative ones, you can't be at the top of your game forever. I think in the world of popular entertainment, comedians have it good, in that even after they peak, their "on the job training" leaves them well prepared to have long lasting and lucrative b-level careers. Drew Carey seems to get this. Ellen Degeneris REALLY seems to get this. Dice never quite figured it out. Let's hope Dane Cook never figures it out either.
posted by billyfleetwood at 2:49 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Andrew Dice Clay, as abhorrent as his comedy is to most, is a master at the art of standup.

His riff on Hare Krishnas is actually funny as hell, and even the rest of his material is, once you realize that it's all a colossal goof.
posted by jonmc at 2:59 PM on July 24, 2007

People who can scare up two nickels to rub together are sell-outs.

Ha. Yeah. Here's why I love Drew Carey no matter what -- when I was a stockbroker (shocking, I know), I had a client who ran a large locally-based paint company here in Cleveland.

Drew Carey, despite living in L.A. at the time, bought ALL his paint from this store.

Ok, you can quibble and say [effect whiny emo voice here] Oh, he's not environmentally friendly, shipping that paint halfway across the country when he could buy locally, wah wah wah, but me? I thought that was pretty kickass. He was making fat bank on television but choosing to spend it in his hometown -- a hometown which I might add could definitely use the cash infusion.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 3:35 PM on July 24, 2007

I'll stand up for the Diceman, too. He kind of hit the big time during a team when the PC police were just about reaching their ascendancy (at least on my college campus). In spite, or moreover because of this, there was a sense forbiddenness in his jokes. Beyond this, his delivery (à la an outer boroughs mook) seemed to indicate that he was making as much fun of his own persona as anything. His schtick never really struck me as being genuinely misogynistic (though every woman that I dated LOATHED him).
posted by psmealey at 3:35 PM on July 24, 2007

His schtick never really struck me as being genuinely misogynistic (though every woman that I dated LOATHED him).

During his peak popularity, I was dating an outer borough woman and she thought he was funny. and, yeah, part of his appeal (just like Kinison) was that he made the prissier elements of the pc crowd get all agitated.
posted by jonmc at 4:01 PM on July 24, 2007

AKA "Taking the priss."
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:05 PM on July 24, 2007

Yeah, Carey's also well known for his generosity to libraries. When he went on some celebrity gameshow or other, he gave his winnings to Ohio's public libraries.
posted by box at 4:41 PM on July 24, 2007

double sex president of the universe

I've just figured out what I want to do with my life.

As far as Drew Carey goes, his whole persona, from what I've seen, has always been a slightly ironic, jocular update of the archetypal 50's ratpack-esque goodtime wise guy. Who better for a gameshow in 2007? The Price is Right has creeped me out since I was a kid, but still.

Also: fuck Andrew Dice Clay. You know, UP THE ASS, because hahaha I said UP THE ASS.

His schtick never really struck me as being genuinely misogynistic

Have you ever heard any of the bootlegs out on net radio, recordings of gigs when things weren't going quite so well up on stage, particularly from later in his 'career'? Oh yeah, he was a hater, alright, or a better freakin' actor that [insert your most respected actor here].
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:59 PM on July 24, 2007

You know, I am so consistently typing 'that' in place of 'than' lately that I think I may have a very small and specific brain tumour.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:00 PM on July 24, 2007

The latest issue of TV Guide reports that Bob Barker made Ten Million Dollars per year.

To quote the great TV host and comedian, Krusty the Klown, "I couldn't say no! They drove a dump truck full of money up to my house!"
posted by Otis at 5:36 PM on July 24, 2007

Way back when, Clay was a guest on Politically Incorrect, across from Coulter. Ann spent the entire show staring at him with unabashed fascination and not a little "please do me" in her body language and expressions. (And he was reasonably, if bluntly, articulate about representing his point of view.)
posted by maxwelton at 5:57 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Have you ever heard any of the bootlegs out on net radio

OK, got me there. I'm not familiar with anything the guy has done since about 1989.
posted by psmealey at 6:43 PM on July 24, 2007

Before, Bob Barker was hosting The Price Is Right. I didn't watch.

Soon, Drew Carey will be hostling The Price is Right. I'm not anticipating a change in my behavior.

Maybe if he does anything particularly interesting, someone will put it up on youtube. I haven't turned on my TV in months. I'm not even sure if it still works.

His green screen show was a fun idea. I just wish it had been given more of an opportunity to find its footing and get its audience before it was unceremoniously cancelled. It was on the WB, which has since become CW, which has since become irrelevant.

Interestingly, CW is owned by both Warner and CBS. The Price Is Right is a CBS commodity. Green Screen was a WB show. Before that, Carey was working with ABC/Disney for Whose Line and his namesake show before that. Of course that's all irrelevant since everyone knows that all the networks are being run into the ground by a secretly rich Carrot Top anyway.
posted by ZachsMind at 7:21 PM on July 24, 2007

It's not clear to me that Drew Carey is in trouble. Bob Barker got to beat the shit out of Adam Sandler after 25 years of hosting TPIR, and I thought that was funny as hell.
posted by A dead Quaker at 7:23 PM on July 24, 2007

Drew Carey's career is in about as much trouble as David Letterman's... i.e.: none at all.

Curiously, that's what she said.
posted by ZachsMind at 7:34 PM on July 24, 2007

She who?
posted by jonmc at 8:21 PM on July 24, 2007

i've been thinking about this all day.. i'm obiviously a huge fan of the show... and i still just wish that Marc Summers wasn't busy.

good luck Drew.
posted by AloneOssifer at 8:31 PM on July 24, 2007

That's what she said.

"She who?"

Your Mom.

*ducking for cover*
posted by ZachsMind at 8:33 PM on July 24, 2007

Ooh. Hadn't thought of Marc Summers in many moons, but yeah he woulda made a better replacement for Bob Barker. I have trouble seeing Drew Carey fitting in Bob Barker's metaphorical shoes. My guess is they're planning on taking Price is Right in a new direction after BB retires. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not.

It's a formula that works apparently and has worked for decades, but I see Carey 'tweaking' the formula to fit his sensibilities better, and that'll cause the series to suffer.

Not that I care. I think the last time I watched the Price is Right with any semi regularity was back in college, and that's only when it would be on in the Student Union Building's TV room and I was wasting time in between classes. It'd either be that or some soap opera that made no sense.
posted by ZachsMind at 8:51 PM on July 24, 2007

All I know is, as soon as Drew Carey misses his first putt on camera he is dead to me.
posted by Stan Chin at 8:54 PM on July 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

If Drew Carey does for The Price Is Right what he did for Whose Line Is It Anyway?, now might be a good time to put stickers on all the things you want.
posted by Reggie Digest at 7:51 AM on July 25, 2007

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