Danger: Jealous Computers

August 5, 2007 2:55 PM

Be careful when you use your Nokia N95 and your computer at the same time. It could be jealous. Scientific research and new studies show people with "laptop bites" and keyboard marks on innocent victim's faces. Learn what you can do to help stop this epidemic.
posted by lslutsky (45 comments total)

Pepsi blue, anyone?
posted by TonyRobots at 2:57 PM on August 5, 2007

It's too bad Nokia stopped making cool phones a few years ago.
posted by b1tr0t at 2:58 PM on August 5, 2007

This post really really sucks lslitsky. Did you really pay $5 to advertise shit for Nokia?
posted by Jimbob at 3:01 PM on August 5, 2007

Wow, the Nokia N95 smartphone looks like an amazing way to communicate with my friends. I am very interested in Nokia's new N-series phones and how they might fit into my lifestyle and improve my productivity. Where can I find out more about this amazing new product?
posted by redteam at 3:02 PM on August 5, 2007

The website is owned and operated as an advertising promotion for Nokia. I thought it was funny, though.
posted by lslutsky at 3:03 PM on August 5, 2007

It's not.
posted by Orange Pamplemousse at 3:04 PM on August 5, 2007

I'm all for the idea that advertising can be art or entertainment, but this really doesn't seem to hit either of those very hard. Perhaps, if the post text introduced it differently (which has saved similar posts), but I don't think so.
posted by jmhodges at 3:06 PM on August 5, 2007

Are you owned and operated by Nokia?
posted by b1tr0t at 3:06 PM on August 5, 2007

Ugh.
posted by jonson at 3:08 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

At least "bite" is an accurate tag.
posted by BeerFilter at 3:09 PM on August 5, 2007

No digg.
posted by porn in the woods at 3:10 PM on August 5, 2007

THIS THREAD IS READY FOR DELETION
posted by baphomet at 3:10 PM on August 5, 2007 [5 favorites]

Nokia Blue!
posted by ericb at 3:10 PM on August 5, 2007

The best part is how they pixellate the supposed computer bites on the leg of the girl in the dorm footage. What cowards. They want all the benefits of internet viral marketing but don't even have the balls to deliver anything worth passing along.
posted by mediareport at 3:11 PM on August 5, 2007

Actually I like Nokia. The N95 is practically as expensive as a laptop, though.
posted by delmoi at 3:14 PM on August 5, 2007

I had my butler flag this post from his iPhone.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 3:16 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

also, not new.
I don't think less of my Nokia 9300 for it, though.
it's been fun, this thread
posted by Busithoth at 3:17 PM on August 5, 2007

lslitsky. Listen. Fuck off.
posted by lemonfridge at 3:24 PM on August 5, 2007

Sorry if anybody was offended or if I should not have posted this-I intended this to be a funny joke for everyone. This is one of my first posts to metafilter. BTW if you read the TOS it says it is owned by nokia. Sorry to everyone who was offended by this post.
posted by lslutsky at 3:24 PM on August 5, 2007

The website is owned and operated as an advertising promotion for Nokia.

Really? You could always think about applying to work there, since you obviously share the same taste in completely misguided and disingenuous viral marketing campaigns.
posted by dhammond at 3:25 PM on August 5, 2007

I've always thought of Metafilter as a CIA front, I never would have expected that Nokia owns it.
posted by b1tr0t at 3:25 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

nothing more hilarious than finnish advertising humor. those wacky finns!
posted by Hat Maui at 3:27 PM on August 5, 2007

You know, I really like pizza.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 3:27 PM on August 5, 2007

hey, if it's good enough for boingboing... Ad made in Belgium btw.
posted by pj_rivera at 3:32 PM on August 5, 2007

Mmm Pizza. What kind?
posted by splatta at 3:33 PM on August 5, 2007

bad post ≠ bad poster. Lay off, lemonfridge & dhammond.
posted by wemayfreeze at 3:33 PM on August 5, 2007

New account, five throwaway comments, and a marketing post.

Yeah, banhammer.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 3:33 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

This is a really awesome post and I'm totally excited about the new opportunities for communications excellence from Nokia!
posted by Avenger at 3:35 PM on August 5, 2007

mr_crash_davis, 3 comments. 2 of his total 5 were made defending this thread, the other three were made in other threads today.


3 comments = minimum before posting, no?
posted by Orange Pamplemousse at 3:36 PM on August 5, 2007

nothing more hilarious than finnish advertising humor. those wacky finns!
What's the closest thing to a fishes asshole?
posted by Floydd at 3:38 PM on August 5, 2007

1 post, 5 comments?

This was paid for.
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:54 PM on August 5, 2007

Fuck off with your motherfucking ads, asshole.
posted by w0mbat at 3:56 PM on August 5, 2007

These cell phones... they vibrate?
posted by The White Hat at 3:56 PM on August 5, 2007

Yeah, and all the other comments are total throwaways.
posted by mr_roboto at 4:00 PM on August 5, 2007

[posting in a legendary thread]
posted by Avenger at 4:08 PM on August 5, 2007

Thread needs deletion, badly. But I'll feed the troll for now :

N95s are potentially very nice phones, but they crash waaay too much. Well maybe N95s don't crash quite as much as iPhones, but they still crash lots.

iPhones are an interesting product : very very few features comparatively, no MMS, no camera flash, etc., but the interface gets people using it's features more fully.

Well, execpt one little detail : the iPhone has no cut&paste. So much for that whole computer in the palm of your hand idea there. lol
posted by jeffburdges at 4:10 PM on August 5, 2007

this is nothing ... i just opened a nice cool bottle of pepsi blue and was attacked by a 2 liter bottle of diet coke!

it's not funny ... getting bitchslapped by a 2 liter bottle HURTS!
posted by pyramid termite at 4:11 PM on August 5, 2007

Suddenly I'm hungry for a Nokia cell phone.
posted by dirigibleman at 4:11 PM on August 5, 2007

I had a play with an N95 for a couple of days. They are chunky and slow if you want to *gasp* call folk. Maybe if you absolutely need all the other features? But not much good for me.
posted by bystander at 4:12 PM on August 5, 2007

Dr. Bronner: Dilute! Dilute!

Metafilter: Delete! Delete!
posted by Tube at 4:14 PM on August 5, 2007

My Nokia N95 took pictures of the local elementary school's 3rd grade gym class and uploaded them to freenet.
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 4:19 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

Cell phones are, without exception, a painfully shitty way to surf the web. Even the jesus phone doesn't offer flash or ajax.
posted by mullingitover at 4:19 PM on August 5, 2007

Even the jesus phone doesn't offer flash or ajax.

but you can't beat it for overseas calls
posted by pyramid termite at 4:25 PM on August 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

delete; ban
posted by Meatbomb at 4:26 PM on August 5, 2007

Where are your means of production now, bitch!
posted by phoque at 4:29 PM on August 5, 2007