Comments on: Chimp Walking Bulldogs

Chimp Walking Bulldogs

jonson — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:36:36 -0800

I've been struggling for days to refrain from posting this video of a chimp taking five British bulldogs for a walk around the streets of Japan, and it looks like I failed.

By: Item

Item — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:46:36 -0800

That monkey sucks at dog-walking.

By: The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew

The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:47:11 -0800

Japanese television intrigues me. It's like a distillation of american just-for-entertainment TV. They really have the "no educational value" thing down.

By: jonson

jonson — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:47:25 -0800

How DARE you?!? He is the GREATEST dog-walking monkey in the history of the great apes.

By: IronLizard

IronLizard — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:48:30 -0800

It's begun. The apes will be enslaved soon. They will later take over the earth and return the favor.

By: CitrusFreak12

CitrusFreak12 — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:48:47 -0800

THEY HAVE BACKPACKS.

By: Quidam

Quidam — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:49:07 -0800

but what happens next?? what does the hawk do?

By: Poolio

Poolio — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:51:31 -0800

Next thing you know, chimps will be moonwalking.

By: Item

Item — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:53:38 -0800

He is the GREATEST dog-walking monkey in the history of the great apes. Oh, I'm not arguing that. I'm just saying that if it were me walking those dogs, I would've only let one of them fall into the gutter. One at most.

By: Item

Item — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:55:45 -0800

Which reminds me... paging Ufez Jones. Ufez Jones, you're wanted in the chimp-walking-dogs thread.

By: gum

gum — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 22:59:04 -0800

I've been struggling for days to refrain from posting this video of a chimp taking five British bulldogs for a walk around the streets of Japan, and it looks like I failed. Your loss shall be my gain.

By: kingfisher, his musclebound cat

kingfisher, his musclebound cat — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:02:53 -0800

Much cuter than that leather-clad silverback ape that walks bullmastiffs around my neighborhood. Maybe it's the little backpacks.

By: azpenguin

azpenguin — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:18:51 -0800

Our bulldog is sleeping under the bed, snoring away. But if he were awake, he'd thank you for this link.

By: flapjax at midnite

flapjax at midnite — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:28:02 -0800

I think some of the folks who are in charge of choosing the music for these shows are brilliant: they're forever coming up with good and funny choices for the pop song snippets they always use as soundtracks for these kinds of shows. The sound effects are good too.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:29:51 -0800

Actually, it looks like Chimp-A-Pan & bulldogs hang out a lot.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:30:27 -0800

Your failure is noble, my friend.

By: MetaMonkey

MetaMonkey — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:36:14 -0800

I want to know what the monkey was saying.

By: Cranberry

Cranberry — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:36:59 -0800

Japanese Funniest Home Videos. jonson, I am not going to call that phone number and ask for a gold star for you.

By: cmonkey

cmonkey — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:40:48 -0800

Chimpanzees aren't monkeys.

By: homunculus

homunculus — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:44:13 -0800

A monkey versus a dog.

By: Mister Cheese

Mister Cheese — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 00:00:06 -0800

Dude, that's too cute. My favorite, though, is miss lynnster's second Pan and James link. I wonder if the chimp learned (or learned to imitate) that quickly or if it required dozens of takes.

By: Item

Item — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 00:01:53 -0800

Chimpanzees aren't monkeys. They are when they're walking dogs.

By: zardoz

zardoz — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 01:11:41 -0800

Japanese television intrigues me. It's like a distillation of american just-for-entertainment TV. They really have the "no educational value" thing down. I'd think so too if I just watched YouTube clips like this, but if you watch a lot of Japanese TV, it has just as many, if not more, "serious" and educational shows as U.S. television does. What makes Japanese TV stand out, I think, is that when it's wacky, it's really wacky. The short explanation of this is it's part of the culture to be over the top if your role is a comedian...but that's a long story. But even the wacky game shows often have really challenging questions in all sorts of subjects. Crap American shows like "Deal or No Deal" and "Who's smarter than a 5th grader" can't even compare.

By: Poolio

Poolio — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 01:24:18 -0800

Chimpanzees aren't monkeys. item - They are when they're walking dogs. So, what does that make people who walk dogs and/or monkeys?

By: plokent

plokent — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 01:52:46 -0800

That clip is from Genius Chimpanzee Pan-kun's birthday special with two more clips. Here are my favorite Pan-kun videos: Pan-kun cooks tanuki udon noodles. Pan-kun joins the fire department. Pan-kun harvests and processes the rice crop. Pan-kun Jurassic Park special. Pan-kun goes fishing.

By: down the rabbit lolz

down the rabbit lolz — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 02:01:47 -0800

I may have to consider getting a bulldog now that i realize one could be employed as a laptop porter.

By: redteam

redteam — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 03:53:01 -0800

Question 1: What was that song playing while he was running away with the cake? Question 2: OMFG what happens next?! Observations: That chimp is a badass climber. This show has the best sound effects ever. That chimp could probably swing all of those dogs around in a big circle if he wanted to. This is the best video I've seen since ... um ... well, since that Alexyss K. Tylor video - but it was a while since something ruled this much before that. Thank you so much!

By: plokent

plokent — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 04:41:13 -0800

This is what happens next. Pan-kun and James are currently performing Mito Komon at Cuddly Dominion's Miyazawa Theater (Pan-kun is Suke-san and James is Kaku-san). There's even an internet shop selling Pan-kun and James merchandise to Japanese customers.

By: QuarterlyProphet

QuarterlyProphet — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 04:57:27 -0800

I just like the fact that the monkey is dressed as an extra for a Dexy's Midnight Runners video

By: lodurr

lodurr — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 05:09:17 -0800

That chimp could probably swing all of those dogs around in a big circle if he wanted to. Damn straight. Those buggers are strong. And mean. Don't fuck with them, or they'll rip your appendages off.

By: lodurr

lodurr — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 05:11:00 -0800

... oh, and, Jonsson? One day at a time, man. One day at a time.

By: Pecinpah

Pecinpah — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 05:53:25 -0800

This made me laugh out loud. I'm old and easily entertained.

By: AD_

AD_ — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 06:30:33 -0800

That was the finest chimp walking bulldogs clip I've ever seen.

By: RokkitNite

RokkitNite — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 06:33:28 -0800

It took till about halfway through that video before I realised I was gripped by the twists and turns of the narrative. Gripped. It's like an incredible satire of all television.

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 06:46:25 -0800

I miss Pop Up Video. But some are available thanks to the wonder of YouTube.

By: Citizen Premier

Citizen Premier — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:00:57 -0800

Holy crap, that chimp speaks Japanese and Thai!

By: howfar

howfar — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:06:17 -0800

Ha. I'm smarter than that chimp!

By: Iron Rat

Iron Rat — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:08:57 -0800

It is impossible that those backpacks do not contain bento boxes, how do the bullys handle chopsticks with their stubby paws?

By: empath

empath — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:21:58 -0800

Rokkit: Exactly my reaction. At first I was all: lolmonkey! And then I was like: "BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CAKE???!!!"

By: howfar

howfar — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:26:18 -0800

But seriously, this sort of thing is really creepy. Chimpanzees are aggressive, physically powerful creatures. Anthropomorphising them in a dangerous business. From Lodurr's last link. After James Davis had had all his fingers torn or bitten off: Ape specialist Deborah Fouts...said the attack may have been prompted by jealousy. 'Chimpanzees have a real sense of right and wrong and fairness and unfairness," said Fouts...'It sounds like people were showering a lot of attention on Moe, birthday cake and the like. . . . Perhaps the other chimps were jealous." I'm sure that Mr. Davis will find it comforting to believe that he was appallingly mutilated out of a "sense of right and wrong", and not because of "experts" who spout this anthropomorphic crap about wild animals.

By: Burhanistan

Burhanistan — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:34:01 -0800

anthropomorphic crap about wild animals. Well, too be fair, these things can learn a fair amount of language and menial tasks. It's not overly really "crapping anthropomorphism" to suggest that they have rudimentary moral systems, albeit crude and violent ones. Tennis anyone?

By: empath

empath — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:37:03 -0800

From what I understand, chimps do behave some what predictably if you know their rules. The people treating a chimp like their baby were the ones with the problem, not the scientist explaining why chimps do what they do.

By: howfar

howfar — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:52:20 -0800

Burhanistan, I disagree, I have to say. "Jealousy" is not a about a sense of "right and wrong" The evidence that great apes can actually learn language, rather that certain kinds of non-linguistic symbol use, is extremely sketchy. The primatologists who claim otherwise generally seem to exhibit the same kind of anthropomorphism that dog owners do, when they tell you "he understands every word I say". Which is not to say that chimps aren't intelligent, but that we should respect and admire them for what they are, rather than what we would like them to be. Monkey Tennis? Rath-er old sort! On preview: empath, I actually think that certain kinds of primatologists are part of the problem. They do bad science and make exaggerated claims for ape language.

By: BobbyDigital

BobbyDigital — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:58:30 -0800

This is the greatest thing I have ever seen on the internet, don't be jerk it up with your "science".

By: arcticwoman

arcticwoman — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 07:59:28 -0800

I enjoyed that.

By: howfar

howfar — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 08:00:55 -0800

Alright! Alright! I'm just bitter because I haven't got 5 dogs with backpacks. One day....

By: ericb

ericb — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 08:10:35 -0800

Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp!

By: Meagan

Meagan — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 08:49:55 -0800

Every time I watch crazy Japanese clips like this, I think back to my family photo albums complete with silly caption stickers and cringe. That said, so cute!!

By: gomichild

gomichild — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:11:18 -0800

I fail to see the wacky here. Now if it was penguins instead of bulldogs, maaaaaybe....

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:25:18 -0800

I wish I were a chimpanzee. In Japan.

By: spec80

spec80 — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:30:26 -0800

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CAKE?

By: Tuwa

Tuwa — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:41:35 -0800

spec80: see here.

By: Tuwa

Tuwa — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:42:11 -0800

Gah. borked the html. here, I mean.

By: Atom Eyes

Atom Eyes — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:52:57 -0800

You're doing the Lord's work here, jonson.

By: amyms

amyms — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 09:56:44 -0800

THEY HAVE BACKPACKS. And their leashes MATCH THEIR BACKPACKS!

By: vetiver

vetiver — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 11:04:26 -0800

And their COLLARS! And their DIALOG BALOONS! Do they ever take the backpacks off? What's IN those backpacks? Lots of poop bags? And they seem to be listing pretty severely to starboard toward the end there. Thanks for this and for the follow-up/other links. Sublime nonsense.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 11:33:41 -0800

This is further cementing my belief that the Japanese are not actually real; that they are, instead, a very advanced, animated computer construct, cleverly designed to act in ways that make me grin.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 11:34:18 -0800

Also, Breaking News! Bulldogs continue to be awesome.

By: Phantomx

Phantomx — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 12:15:29 -0800

This is like the precursor to Conquest of the Planet of the Apes. Of course in that movie it only took about a generation for the Apes/Chimps/Orangutans to gain sentience and take over the world.

By: ikkyu2

ikkyu2 — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 23:03:12 -0800

Honestly, maybe I'm going all soft in my old age, but when I saw this, I couldn't help wondering whether this is really the best way to share our planet with chimpanzees. Chimps in movies, by Jane Goodall. Not some crazy PETA person's unthinking screed; just a set of facts.