Are you white?

September 4, 2007 10:57 PM

Should I use blackface on my blog? A flowchart.
posted by klangklangston (44 comments total)

Some of my best friends use blackface.
posted by Poolio at 10:59 PM on September 4, 2007 [4 favorites]

Wow. I just gave up, it was just too damn impressive for me.
Hilarious though.


so, uh, not to sound dumb, but is this blackface thing a current trend in blogging?
posted by papakwanz at 11:11 PM on September 4, 2007 [1 favorite]

Blogging with whiteface would be more professional.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:13 PM on September 4, 2007 [3 favorites]

I'm guessing this appeared on bOINGbOING first.
posted by oncogenesis at 11:19 PM on September 4, 2007 [2 favorites]

Onco, if it did, I didn't see it there (it was linked in a derail of a conversation about a food co-op boycotting Israeli goods on another site I browse).
posted by klangklangston at 11:21 PM on September 4, 2007

Should I use blackface on my blog?

Yes. Of course you should. Everyone should.

Next question, please.
posted by Avenger at 11:29 PM on September 4, 2007

If only I had had this before I wrote my erotic Al Jolson/Ted Danson slash fiction.
posted by jonson at 11:35 PM on September 4, 2007 [6 favorites]

Only on 5 december.
posted by jouke at 11:36 PM on September 4, 2007 [2 favorites]

only if you are Pat Paulsen
posted by vronsky at 11:43 PM on September 4, 2007 [2 favorites]

Metafilter: The Boing Boing you pay money to comment on
posted by Artw at 11:52 PM on September 4, 2007 [8 favorites]

Just snarkin, klang. (But I'm sure it will be on the boing by tomorrow...)
posted by oncogenesis at 12:02 AM on September 5, 2007

Send it to Xeni.

Give the email a sexy headline.
posted by Poolio at 12:11 AM on September 5, 2007

I figured it would be much more simple. Like this:

[ Should I use Blackface on my blog? ]------< no.>

I was right.
posted by loquacious at 12:14 AM on September 5, 2007

Oh for the IMG tag...
posted by Jimbob at 12:16 AM on September 5, 2007

This thread needs some Mr. Bojangles.
posted by Poolio at 12:20 AM on September 5, 2007

What if it's for sexual gratifications, like boytaurs? This is hardly comprehensive.
posted by stavrogin at 12:24 AM on September 5, 2007

The Pat Paulsen bit is funny. Sorry.
posted by Roman Graves at 12:44 AM on September 5, 2007

The universe was different before I knew the word "boytaur" existed.
posted by freebird at 12:49 AM on September 5, 2007

Hilarious!

Except for the fact that someone out there actually wants to get to the "Yes" at the end, and will delude themselves and distort reality until they believe they qualify.
posted by krippledkonscious at 1:17 AM on September 5, 2007

As long as I can still use blackass on my blog it's all good.
posted by srboisvert at 2:14 AM on September 5, 2007

I'm confused how the question "Are you a female Japanese national under 21 who intends to blacken herself?" seems to have three answers. This blogger needs to spend a few decades in an office making official useless flowcharts to get the rules ingrained in their head.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 3:41 AM on September 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

Amusing concept but longer and more complex != funnier.
posted by GuyZero at 4:28 AM on September 5, 2007 [2 favorites]

I really want to know what posesses people to post line art in full ugly JPEG artifact nastiness when PNG (or even GIF) are sitting right there...
posted by Rhomboid at 5:03 AM on September 5, 2007

i think this provides some context: Steve Gilliard (a black man with a computer or two) started a 'incident' by posting an image of black republican android Michael Steele in black face...
posted by geos at 5:11 AM on September 5, 2007

Good gravy.

Thanks, geos.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 6:02 AM on September 5, 2007

Well hey, he gave the go ahead to Japanese Ganguro girls. So there's that.
posted by delmoi at 6:05 AM on September 5, 2007

The only other flowchart that needs to be made is a definitive "Should I Make a Flowchart?" Flowchart.
posted by Foosnark at 6:12 AM on September 5, 2007

There's also the more famous Jane Hamsher, um, incident, which seemed to cause a pretty big scandal during the 2006 campaign.
posted by delmoi at 6:14 AM on September 5, 2007

Here's something interesting: Malkin blames that blackface Michael Steele picture on liberal bloggers. The only time I've ever seen it, apart from on the Internet, was on a refrigerator belonging to a conservative Republican black man. Perhaps there are just too many layers for me, as a liberal white guy, to decode.
posted by Faint of Butt at 6:19 AM on September 5, 2007

Man, I love a good flowchart.
posted by cortex at 6:34 AM on September 5, 2007

Memin Pinguin!
posted by doctorschlock at 6:47 AM on September 5, 2007

Goddam that's a flowchart.
posted by Mister_A at 6:48 AM on September 5, 2007

I see a lot of names I've never heard of and links to sites I never knew existed, so now I have to ask: Is this another one of those blogosphere insider controversies where various bloggers jockey for some position in an imagined blogger hierarchy?

Is this the 2007 version of the legendary "Jessica Valenti Breast Controversy"?
posted by Pastabagel at 7:22 AM on September 5, 2007

What if you're creating a Web page that sells black face and blackface-related merchandise, such as burnt cork and copies of "Behind the Minstrel Mask"? I need an answer here -- my page goes live in six hours!
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:26 AM on September 5, 2007

Shouldn't you be selling corpse paint?
posted by Pastabagel at 7:29 AM on September 5, 2007

Only on 5 december.
posted by jouke at 2:36 AM on September 5

Ahh, Zwarte Piet how I'd forgotten about you!
posted by ob at 7:34 AM on September 5, 2007

Astro Zombie, that's not what the blue is for. Take it to AskMe.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:39 AM on September 5, 2007

There is no condition labelled "Are you charging your laser?"
posted by brownpau at 8:37 AM on September 5, 2007 [3 favorites]

The fact that the author is confused by ganguro girls and thinking that the "blackening" relates to race only tells me that everything comes down to skin color for him, more so than apparently the people who he is instructing on the proper usage of blackface in blog banners. Siggggh.

Maybe this is so ironic that it's lost on me, but that hipster thing never really made sense either.
posted by taursir at 9:23 AM on September 5, 2007

Is this another one of those blogosphere insider controversies where various bloggers jockey for some position in an imagined blogger hierarchy?

We have a winner!
posted by deanc at 9:29 AM on September 5, 2007

I sort of enjoyed scrolling around it on my fairly low resolution laptop, it was kind of like reading a Choose Your Own Adventure.

Spoiler Alert: For reasons too numerous to list, I'm not allowed to use blackface.
posted by quin at 10:50 AM on September 5, 2007

Do you think Loren Feldman read this?
posted by veronica sawyer at 12:17 PM on September 5, 2007

Can blogging be over soon, please?
posted by Soulfather at 1:48 PM on September 5, 2007

Coles Notes summary:

Q: Am I allowed to use blackface on my blog?
A: Only if you're Dave Chapelle or a hot Japanese girl.
posted by chrominance at 4:23 PM on September 5, 2007