ebay Gevalt!

September 9, 2007 7:21 PM

Struck out on those Streisand tickets? Sick of getting stuck with the once-a-year folding chairs at the back of the shul? Here's the auction you've been waiting for! 2 front row seats at Temple Emanu-El of South Beach, not only for this high holidays, but for you to pass on, in perpetuity, from generation to generation. Bidding starts at a paltry 1.8 million dollars.
posted by ericbop (24 comments total)

Are Muslims allowed to bid? It would be pretty funny to have two empty seats forever.
posted by Liosliath at 7:24 PM on September 9, 2007

...and i care cuz why again? Sorry, I musta missed a meeting. Streisand still sings in public? Didn't she have a Last Concert Ever some years ago? Or was that just wishful thinking on my part?
posted by ZachsMind at 7:24 PM on September 9, 2007

Sugar tickets.
posted by Poolio at 7:26 PM on September 9, 2007

...ah. I see. In order to comprehend this thread I have to be jewish. Fine. Everybody make fun of the pseudo-Christian. You can keep your baklava! I'm gonna go have a hissy fit in the mazel tov! Nyah! =P
posted by ZachsMind at 7:29 PM on September 9, 2007

so how much does god have to pay to get in?
posted by pyramid termite at 7:29 PM on September 9, 2007 [8 favorites has favorites]

Tickets for Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur services -- which mark the Jewish new year and are the holiest days in the religion -- are in high demand and are hard to come by at most temples. At Temple Emanu-El, two seats cost $1,800 for congregation members.

Yahweh only loves the rich.
posted by T.D. Strange at 7:35 PM on September 9, 2007

so how much does god have to pay to get in?
posted by pyramid termite

Possibly the best response I have ever seen on the blue
posted by timsteil at 7:38 PM on September 9, 2007

There's more spirituality in a pay toilet than that god-awful temple.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:42 PM on September 9, 2007

Tickets for Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur services -- which mark the Jewish new year and are the holiest days in the religion -- are in high demand and are hard to come by at most temples. At Temple Emanu-El, two seats cost $1,800 for congregation members.

Oy veh!
posted by dejah420 at 7:50 PM on September 9, 2007

You can keep your baklava!

Who's gonna tell him?
posted by Reggie Digest at 8:10 PM on September 9, 2007

This is straight out of a Woody Allen routine. No, really.
posted by allen.spaulding at 8:17 PM on September 9, 2007

This is straight out of Curb Your Enthusiasm.
posted by turing_test at 8:27 PM on September 9, 2007

This is straight out of Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Absolutely.
posted by Poolio at 8:29 PM on September 9, 2007

It's probably crap like this that leads to the stererotype of the Rich Jew that Rules the World.

In response to that stereotype, my good friend Batya, an orthodox Jew, commented "If Jews really do rule the world, couldn't they at least cut me in?"
posted by SansPoint at 8:33 PM on September 9, 2007

Wow, tickets to get into church.
posted by smackfu at 8:50 PM on September 9, 2007

Money quote (heh) from the second link:

'Depending on how you look at it, it could really be a good deal,' [temple President Jerry] Jacobs said.
posted by danb at 9:10 PM on September 9, 2007

Is this a normal thing with synogogues? Paying for seats? That's crazy stupid, but most of the time I think religion is crazy stupid, so...
posted by zardoz at 11:27 PM on September 9, 2007

zardoz: yep, the creator of heaven and earth is only a two dimensional construct to these people.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:32 PM on September 9, 2007

Burhanistan writes "There's more spirituality in a pay toilet than that god-awful temple."

Particularly if that pay toilet is being used for cottaging.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:55 AM on September 10, 2007

This post was just an excuse to use the "oybay" tag, wasn't it?
posted by whir at 1:56 AM on September 10, 2007

Sorry to cut the humor, but I think some context is in order.

• Synagogues don't have collection plates. The way most synagogues pay salaries to their rabbi, cantor, etc. is through membership dues. And Jewish professionals don't come cheap. On the other hand, they will also be willing to work something out with those who are financially unable to pay their dues.
• Selling seats is pretty chutzpahdik, but it at least used to be very common, and a big money-maker (donation-getter if you prefer) for synagogues. But I feel like it's fallen out of fashion in general. (My synagogue has an article in it's constitution prohibiting it from ever selling seats.)
• Tickets to high holiday services, on the other hand, are often only available to dues-paying members, since the synagogue's usually pretty full, and after all these are the people who care enough about it to support it. The Miami Herald article tells you that two seats at high holiday services cost $1,800; I'd be willing to bet that what they mean is that membership dues, which entitle you to high holiday tickets, are $1,800.
• It's pretty clear this auction is a publicity stunt. Nobody's going to pay 1.8 million dollars for these seats. If they were going to, they wouldn't do it through EBay: they'd probably call the synagogue and get a whole wing of the building named after them.

It would be nice if organized religion could run on smiles and positive thinking, but it can't. And like it or not, sometimes the needs of an institution will intrude.
posted by goingonit at 6:49 AM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite has favorites]

Thanks for putting this in context, goingonit.

I posted the initial link because I felt like it was a (purposefully?) outrageous example of a practice that is indeed falling out of favor. As a full-time cantor (of a congregation that doesn't sell high holiday tickets), I must agree that without the collection of funds, synagogues would have no way of sustaining the programs (or leadership) that serve their members. Unlike Catholic churches, for example, we don't receive any support from the "mother ship." Quite to the contrary, most synagogues must pay their own memberhship dues to their parent organizations.

But, as you said, most (if not all) congregations have policies in place to make sure that those who cannot afford to support their synagogues to the fullest extent are still warmly welcomed into the community, which is why those who can afford to contribute more are often asked to do so (though not usually this crassly!)
posted by ericbop at 7:11 AM on September 10, 2007

"Depending on how you look at it, it could really be a good deal,' Jacobs said.

After reading their "messages" page, with its "Torah on Tap" rabbi-and-beer discussions and yoga classes, it seems pretty clear this was a symbolic joke to get the Temple some attention, probably with a side helping of "Who knows? We might get some rich schmoe to actually pay." Surprised cooler heads didn't prevail on this one, though. It's a really dumb stunt that plays into old stereotypes in shallow, easily spread ways.

Meh.
posted by mediareport at 7:26 AM on September 10, 2007

Unlike Catholic churches, for example, we don't receive any support from the "mother ship." Quite to the contrary, most synagogues must pay their own memberhship dues to their parent organizations.

...err, we get nothing from the "mother ship", and pay a minimum 13% tax to our "parent organization" on ALL money collected...
posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 7:10 AM on September 11, 2007