Comments on: Greg Nog was a Host at the Olive Garden

Greg Nog was a Host at the Olive Garden

yhbc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:10:59 -0800

Greg Nog was a Host at the Olive Garden. He has also drawn several other cartoons, and made some other stuff which you may like as well.

For the folks who don't ~~customarily~~ ~~habitually~~ obsessively read MetaTalk. Greg Nog is, of course, MeFi's own Greg Nog.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:13:49 -0800

After reading most of them I decided they were just too good not to share with everyone.

By: tristeza

tristeza — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:18:00 -0800

God, those are great - thanks!

By: drezdn

drezdn — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:20:07 -0800

These are really well done.

By: gummi

gummi — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:26:18 -0800

Man, those OG strips sum up my time at RT pretty accurately. Coaster tosses and pancake denial. Yeah, good times.

By: interrobang

interrobang — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:27:55 -0800

This one is my favorite.

By: iconomy

iconomy — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:29:58 -0800

The OG strips made my morning.

By: MrMoonPie

MrMoonPie — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:31:33 -0800

God damn, I remember the last time I went to Olive Garden. I'd just met a woman, via friends, and we were in that stage of trying to figure out if we wanted to date, or just, you know, be friends. We were out Christmas shopping—seemed like a fun thing to do, a good way to get to know someone, right? We were hitting a bunch of small shops in an area I was very familiar with, but that she hadn't been to before. She suggested dinner. Since I knew the area, I began to espouse the amazing ethnic diversity of the place, the fact that there was a fantastic Peruvian place across the street, and the DC-metro area's best Thai a block away, or, hey, maybe just a quick bowl of Pho, or, since we're going up the street later, maybe that fantastic Vietnamese place? She interrupted me with "Geez, I said I was hungry. You should've just asked me what I wanted." She wanted the Olive Garden. We stayed friends, at least.

By: HappyHippo

HappyHippo — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:36:53 -0800

Great post and great comics. Valentines of Unfulfillment pure Genius! You have made my day!

By: Curry

Curry — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:38:22 -0800

Really quite lovely.

By: DU

DU — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:38:24 -0800

The more I read the hilariouser they are. Also, love the drawing style.

By: MrMoonPie

MrMoonPie — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:41:44 -0800

"Enchanted piece of lettuce" will now be a permanent part of my lexicon.

By: Kloryne

Kloryne — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:42:39 -0800

The OG strips made my morning too. Well, those and the chicken hat. Thanks for sharing!

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:48:42 -0800

True story, once upon a time, these strips made me have an internet crush on Greg.

By: bookish

bookish — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:54:05 -0800

The Olive Garden strips are beautiful. Makes me want to make a comic about my job as a line cook at an OG knock-off.

By: odinsdream

odinsdream — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:59:50 -0800

Well, that was awesome.

By: odinsdream

odinsdream — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:00:46 -0800

Obligatory Olive Garden Cheese Chicken

By: agregoli

agregoli — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:04:31 -0800

Fantastic! Thanks!!!

By: rhymer

rhymer — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:07:04 -0800

I've always wondered what Olive gardens are like as we don't have any in the UK and none of my American friends have seen fit to take me to one when I visit. Are they awful? Or are they sort of OK really. I'm intrigued as we don't really have this sort of chain restaurant here (although I'm sure we will soon).

By: rhymer

rhymer — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:08:20 -0800

Comic is rather good, BTW.

By: danb

danb — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:10:00 -0800

Those are hilarious. Thanks yhbc, and Greg Nog, you rock.

By: spec80

spec80 — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:13:51 -0800

Ugh I was a hostess at California Pizza Kitchen. Those comics make me laugh and cry.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:19:42 -0800

Oh my. My very own "MeFi's own"? SUCK IT, WOZNIAK. I guess I oughtta draw some more comics now.

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:28:57 -0800

Metafilter: When you're here, you're family. A dysfunctional family of surly drunks with various weeping sores and caustic flatulence... and now you're part of it.

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:29:59 -0800

I've been here before. *shudder* Great stuff, Greg Nog.

By: COBRA!

COBRA! — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:31:42 -0800

These are great; my appreciation for the comics talent pool here seems to know no bounds.

By: agregoli

agregoli — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:35:18 -0800

Are they awful? Or are they sort of OK really. This sentence somehow perfectly conveys my feelings on Olive Garden. They ARE awful, especially if you've ever had, you know, Italian food, but they are sort of OK really. But awful. But ok.

By: jamaro

jamaro — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:36:39 -0800

Greg, these are delightful. Thank you, yhbc.

By: jamesonandwater

jamesonandwater — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:37:13 -0800

Those are fab Greg Nog.

By: JHarris

JHarris — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:39:19 -0800

These are most excellent. In other news, today I had a sandwich.

By: Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America

Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:43:49 -0800

I've never been to an Olive Garden. Now I'm tempted.

By: agregoli

agregoli — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:51:46 -0800

Make more comics! Make some of these into a book! I'd totally buy it. You're fantastic.

By: MrMoonPie

MrMoonPie — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:52:49 -0800

I agree with agregoli. The times I've been, my meal was sort of OK, really. Lots of garlic, which (of course) is a good thing, though my date referenced above didn't like it for that reason (yeah, she insisted on Olive Garden, but didn't like garlic). It didn't suck, I guess.

By: CitrusFreak12

CitrusFreak12 — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:53:22 -0800

This comic is very-good, Greg-Nog. Well-done.

By: mewithoutyou

mewithoutyou — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:53:36 -0800

These are great! Thank you!

By: nasreddin

nasreddin — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 11:55:06 -0800

Yeah, this is super cool, and the Plato one was quite awesome and a little sad.

By: JHarris

JHarris — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:02:12 -0800

If Mr. Nog (Captain Nog? Admiral Nog? Doctor Nog? Mr. Gregory Nog, Esq.?) is reading still this... if you had an RSS feed that updated when there was a new comic, I'd subscribe to it.

By: vito90

vito90 — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:12:05 -0800

These are really, really great and would benefit from a construction set, ala Red Meat.

By: supercres

supercres — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:16:49 -0800

She wanted the Olive Garden. We stayed friends, at least. Snerk. Who hasn't had one of those in his/her past?

By: rusty

rusty — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:16:53 -0800

Meh. Those kind of sucked. I'm just kidding. I thought they were great too. But the lack of snark is getting a little creepy in here.

By: rusty

rusty — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:20:05 -0800

Also, oh my god, he is me.

By: davejay

davejay — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:24:04 -0800

Bravo, sir. Well done. Brought the funny. But the lack of snark is getting a little creepy in here. NOTHACKIST

By: docpops

docpops — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:26:06 -0800

I always assumed Olive Garden made their money on the backs of drug reps hauling trays of hyper-salted bread and pasta to doctor's lunches. It is the very definition of serviceable mediocrity. I have never been inside one but have been lulled into many twenty minute comas following a plate of their pasta and a PowerPoint show on heart failure. And I generally hate these links to comics, but these were really funny, imo. Esp. Jesus mentioning traffic was a bitch.

By: cowbellemoo

cowbellemoo — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:41:46 -0800

omigosh! my dream came true!

By: Nabubrush

Nabubrush — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:45:31 -0800

True story, once upon a time, these strips made me have an internet crush on Greg. Seconded, except for once upon a time sub in right now.

By: Powerful Religious Baby

Powerful Religious Baby — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:54:19 -0800

Oh, Greg Nog! I just now got it!

By: Tuwa

Tuwa — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:57:20 -0800

I like that clean, uncluttered drawing style

By: Kadin2048

Kadin2048 — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:58:21 -0800

Love it. Personally, my hell was working in a one-hour photo place. But a restaurant would be worse. Most people don't understand the tiniest bit about making photos and will thus grudgingly respect you as the keeper of powerful black magic that you are, while everyone apparently assumes that their long experience of eating in restaurants qualifies them to shit on the waitstaff's performance.

By: inthe80s

inthe80s — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 13:02:33 -0800

these made my day... despite having a decent night out last night, work was just miserable as hell today. So it's fun to read a strip that makes my job look better by comparison. My wife's family is Italian-American, and Olive Garden is quite often a punch line to any joke involving food. Been there once and the best I can figure is they are to Italian food, what Taco Bell is to Mexican food.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 13:21:47 -0800

Okay, based on JHarris's request, I think I just made an RSS feed: Here we go.

By: i_am_joe's_spleen

i_am_joe's_spleen — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 13:22:26 -0800

These are great. I demand more.

By: batmonkey

batmonkey — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 13:38:42 -0800

Yay. So many talented people here. No wonder I spend a lot of time just reading.

By: astruc

astruc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 13:55:38 -0800

I can't believe I have an Internet crush on someone who worked at OLIVE GARDEN!!!

By: maxwelton

maxwelton — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 14:23:15 -0800

18th? 42nd? that these are great. Thanks, Greg. And thanks, yhbc.

By: cenoxo

cenoxo — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 14:36:09 -0800

Funny stuff — looks like a kinder, gentler Maus, but sounds like Calvin & Hobbes. (BTW, OG's Lemon Cream Cake is pretty good.)

By: rouftop

rouftop — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 14:56:34 -0800

<chant>greg nog greg nog greg nog greg nog</chant> Good stuff.

By: IcyJuly

IcyJuly — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 15:43:05 -0800

Hee hee, love the sense of humor. You have resurrected my faith in crappy-job-based comics, Greg Nog. PS: When I clicked on the feed link, it just took me to your website. Having never subscribed to an RSS feed, however, I wasn't sure what to expect anyway. Please ignore this if it reveals the soft white underbelly of my tech tardation.

By: snsranch

snsranch — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 16:22:25 -0800

Thanks for posting this yhbc! Greg Nog is right on!

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 16:24:26 -0800

Awesome.

By: obloquy

obloquy — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 16:51:33 -0800

The last (and only) time I tried to eat at an Olive Garden, I ended up leaving because of the hostess. She was pleasant enough, but she kept saying "sat" instead of "seated" (as in, "your party is next on the list to be sat!"). Because I'm a pedantic jerk, I eventually had to just walk away hungry.

By: jonmc

jonmc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 16:53:34 -0800

Greg Nog was a Host at the Olive Garden. Really? Maybe he can explain why the canneloni always give me the trots.

By: baphomet

baphomet — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 16:56:16 -0800

The last one really resonated with me, having just made the transition from being a 4 year server/bartender to getting a pretty normal office job. I haven't been back to the last restaurant I worked at, but I imagine that when I leave that's what I'll be thinking...thank fucking everything that I don't work in the restaurant business anymore! Favorite things to do as a host when completely bored:

Reversing the door greet/thank: when people come in, open door and say, "Thanks for stopping by, have a great day!" and when they leave, say, "Welcome to _____, how can I help you?
Following the phrase "Thank you" with the phrase "all your base are belong to us"
Laugh hysterically when they say, "Thanks, you too" after you assure them that all their bases are indeed belong to you
This one works great when somebody comes in alone and there's no wait. They ask for a table, so you ask them for their name. Then you say, "Ok, we'll get you right in." Then you look around blankly for about 30 seconds, then crane your head back and forth across the waiting area while saying, "[their name], party of 1, your table is ready!"
If people walk into your large, noisy restaurant and ask for a quiet table, lead them to a random table and whisper loudly, "This one hasn't said anything all day sir/maam!" OK, I only did that one once, and it got me in a lot of trouble

I could go on like this for days, me and one of the other hosts that I worked with frequently got into a contest of sorts to see who could perturb the customers the most without coming off as being blatantly offensive. If you work as a host, try some of this stuff (like Greg's electric fence), it will make your days bearable when nothing else will. On preview this sounds pretty lame, but when you're doing the most boring, mindless, soul-searing, I-can't-believe-I'm-getting-paid-next-to-nothing-to-do-this job on the planet, small victories that make you feel like a human being are something you grasp like your last breath

By: Senor Cardgage

Senor Cardgage — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 17:36:49 -0800

These are good in that they seem to come from a real place, which is nice. I just dont think they are particularly funny. Seems like "Penny Arcade Funny", which is to say, not funny at all.

By: tepidmonkey

tepidmonkey — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 17:45:08 -0800

These comics are wonderful. I think I have a little Internet crush on Greg too.

By: adgnyc

adgnyc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 18:04:29 -0800

Terrific. I once applied for a job at an Olive Garden, but then I thought, "Nope. Can't do it." After reading these, I remain convinced that I made the right choice.

By: JHarris

JHarris — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 19:02:23 -0800

Ah, thanks for the feed, it's all subscribe-ed now. But could you tell me what's up with the pasta? We've been waiting for half an hour now.

By: empath

empath — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 19:10:33 -0800

I love those. They're not ha-ha funny, but they're true, which is better. Also, "Fetch Me My Poking-stick" made me laugh out loud.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 19:57:57 -0800

Not that anybody asked, but I can't decide if my favorite is the new tie one or the revolution one, because I can see myself in both situations.

By: LobsterMitten

LobsterMitten — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 20:25:43 -0800

You should make this woman into the next mefi t-shirt.

By: lordaych

lordaych — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 20:30:09 -0800

I LOL'd many times, which intrigued my wife significantly. She enjoyed them as well -- I'd declare Greg Nog my new hero, but I have a negative and rather dark outlook on life, so instead I declare Senor Cardgage to be my arch-nemesis. [furrows brow...]

By: cowbellemoo

cowbellemoo — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:00:22 -0800

I will join your new Supergroup to take down Senor Cardgage, Lordaych! Penny Arcade is unfunny to you, SC. Their "fucking Mercedes" (as they would say) precludes you from making that judgment in an objective sense.

By: sugarfish

sugarfish — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:05:34 -0800

Your comics are intriguing. I chose to subscribe to your newsletter via livejournal.

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 22:42:09 -0800

You should make this woman into the next mefi t-shirt. Metafilter: Do y'all got it?

By: Jon Mitchell

Jon Mitchell — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 23:32:00 -0800

No, no, no. Penny Arcade is funny to hardcore gamers and game developers, who, as has been scientifically and objectively established, have some of the least developed senses of humor on the planet, 48% of which consists of reiterating the latest Memes Of The Moment at the slightest, or often no provocation, 30% creating juvenile scatological puns, and the remaining 22% trying to convince everyone they have grown their facial hair "ironically", despite clear evidence to the contrary. IAAGD

By: Jon Mitchell

Jon Mitchell — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 23:32:56 -0800

Oh, and Greg Nog's comics are excellent.

By: Locative

Locative — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 01:16:26 -0800

Pocketbook! Great link, these are awesome.

By: Mister Cheese

Mister Cheese — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 01:50:12 -0800

These comics are the awesome. Greg Nog, I particularly like how you render noses. The flexibility in detail of your Olive Garden comic noses have given me much to think about. This has been my favorite one so far.

By: nickyskye

nickyskye — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 02:05:50 -0800

Fun post yhbc. Got up tonight because the full moon shone so brightly in my window I thought it was dawn and it was only 3am. Amazing moon, with a giant rainbow around it. So I came to MetaFilter for a peek and looked at your cartoons. Laughed so loudly I thought I'd wake up my roommate. Absolutely brilliant. I mean that. Great work GregNog. Seconding Mister Cheese's choice. This one. Reminded me a little of waiter rant blog. But funnier.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 06:57:02 -0800

I'm not sure if anyone has mentioned it yet, but those are really good. Me, I was a server at Louise's Trattoria for 2 years. I had to spend a month studying and memorizing stuff about Louise's food in order to pass their 3 page long server's test. 10+ years later, any time someone mentions capers I must immediately, robotically, announce that "capers are the buds off of a Meditterranean prickly shrub which are salty and slightly lemon in flavor." I will probably do this until the day I die. Just because I can. And because it kinda entertains me.

By: Peecabu

Peecabu — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 08:05:24 -0800

These were great fun. Make sure to see the rest of his site too. The art style is fabulous. Great line work. Olive Garden: Gods forbid anyone with a palate should be forced through the horribly overdecorated doors. As 3-ring binder, chain restaurants go; it's so horrid that it makes Friday's look passable. *shudder*

By: Doohickie

Doohickie — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 09:14:54 -0800

Great. Just great. Yet another "my favorite comic". I just hate when people make posts like this. Yet I have to admit those are some of the best strips. EVAR. Great stuff! ;-)

By: Doohickie

Doohickie — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 09:24:41 -0800

Snerk. Who hasn't had one of those in his/her past? I married one. Seriously, whenever we discuss where to eat out, she goes with the "safe bet". Not adventurous at all when it comes to eating out. Unless, of course, it's a suggestion made by anyone other than me.

By: Lynsey

Lynsey — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 10:06:33 -0800

Wow. Just, wow, most awesome. Glad that greg_nog is a MeFian!

By: Kwine

Kwine — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:21:45 -0800

DO Y'ALL GOT PANCAKES?

By: widdershins

widdershins — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:42:31 -0800

Excellent - really enjoyed these.

By: neuron

neuron — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 12:57:07 -0800

Metafilter: teh* online community that gots pancakes. *LOL, accident

By: jrochest

jrochest — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 15:10:22 -0800

Personally, my hell was working in a one-hour photo place. But a restaurant would be worse. Shoe store. Futon sales. Late-night front desk clerk in a crappy motel. Oh, there are so many, many choices...

By: Tuwa

Tuwa — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 16:01:36 -0800

Personally, my hell was working in a one-hour photo place. But a restaurant would be worse. "Inventory specialist." Roofer. Winn-Dixie stockboy. House painter, with a literally crazy ex-felon boss.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 17:04:59 -0800

Sold clothes. Did singing telegrams. Groomed horses at horse shows. And I was a dog groomer. Being a dog groomer sounds fun, you say? Try being 14, at your first job where you think you're gonna get to play with puppies, and instead being told that part of your job entails extracting the glands in a dog's butt. Any time people start having some kind of contest on "Who's had the grossest job?" I always win.

By: danb

danb — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 10:23:01 -0800

Re dogs' anal glands: Ass Charles.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:25:15 -0800

Late-night front desk clerk in a crappy motel. Actually, a friend of mine was telling me a story about a customer at the hotel where he worked, and it struck me as so familiar to my own experiences with customer service that I made a comic about it. And while I'm here with Secret Bonus Materials that aren't linked on my website: This is a bad faux-New-Yorker comic I made in response to this cartoon that was on gawker.com. This is a comic I made as a form of mourning when my childhood pet died, a couple years back. And this was for a project my roommate wanted to pursue but never followed through on. Mainly, I think he just wanted to think that some good could come from being given a hundred dildos. Anyway, thanks for the kind words, all!

By: agregoli

agregoli — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:04:04 -0800

Sniff. Kasi was a good kitty.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:09:59 -0800

Thank YOU, Greg, especially for the Secret Bonus Materials. But for making me cry a little bit about Kasi, here's a self-link to the only thing I've ever done on the internet that I'm really proud of

By: COBRA!

COBRA! — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:29:25 -0800

Hey, even more greatness. And what IS it with cats and brushes? Ours are so into having their faces brushed with ink brushes that they'll climb up onto my drafting table and just brush themselves silly on my brush rack. It's ridiculous.

By: agregoli

agregoli — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:49:07 -0800

If one more person posts a sweet and sad kitty story, I'm going to freak out. So sad. Yay, DC.

By: CrayDrygu

CrayDrygu — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 16:03:41 -0800

Greg Nog, I just want to add my voice to those saying your comics are awesome. Makes me wish I could do it myself. :)

By: LobsterMitten

LobsterMitten — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 16:21:50 -0800

Aaaaaaaargh, cat mortality! Internet +1, my stonefaced dignity 0.

By: Nabubrush

Nabubrush — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 16:18:53 -0800

Thank YOU, Greg, especially for the Secret Bonus Materials. But for making me cry a little bit about Kasi, here's a self-link to the only thing I've ever done on the internet that I'm really proud of Nooooo!

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 02:21:32 -0800

Greg Nog, the frame of you and your cat cringing is great. I totally relate. And I really, really miss Tommie...

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 02:28:30 -0800

Damnit, yhbc! Damnit! Thanks for sharing.