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Robot Sex
September 26, 2007 3:11 PM   Subscribe

The Sex Life of Robots. [NSFW, via Sex or not?]
posted by homunculus (32 comments total)

 
Vagina == Factory
posted by furtive at 3:26 PM on September 26, 2007


Those robots obviously didn't see the porn song.
posted by CaptMcalister at 3:36 PM on September 26, 2007


That video is hilarious.
posted by gandledorf at 3:42 PM on September 26, 2007


Now I've read about Bonobo apes, I think those should be called Bonobots.
posted by nickyskye at 4:01 PM on September 26, 2007 [1 favorite]


This post is not complete without a link to Code of the Lifemaker.

Oh, and vagina != factory; vagina == loading dock. Uterus == factory. Sperm and ova == design documents. And I guess that means penis == federal express.
posted by localroger at 4:02 PM on September 26, 2007


Oh, and vagina != factory; vagina == loading dock. Uterus == factory. Sperm and ova == design documents. And I guess that means penis == federal express.

What?
posted by delmoi at 4:18 PM on September 26, 2007


Great, now I'm all horny.
posted by Optamystic at 4:21 PM on September 26, 2007


Oh, and vagina != factory; vagina == loading dock. Uterus == factory. Sperm and ova == design documents. And I guess that means penis == federal express.

Or UPS. "What can Brown do for you, today?" Oh, wait - that's the other hole.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:21 PM on September 26, 2007


Um, some penises are brown.
posted by oddman at 4:27 PM on September 26, 2007


Um, some penises are brown.

Yes - yes they are. I was thinking more along the lines of the, uh... "documents," or "packages" being delivered (defined as "Sperm and ova," above, but inferring "shit" when coming from "Brown") when I was making my little quip, as opposed to the, uh... "delivery truck," itself - But there you go. Proves even limp jokes about penises can be offensive without protection.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:38 PM on September 26, 2007


I hope they've got a lot of lube.
posted by Evangeline at 4:43 PM on September 26, 2007


WD-40.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:47 PM on September 26, 2007


My penis starts out pink, but then turns brown. Am I doing something wrong?
posted by Astro Zombie at 4:47 PM on September 26, 2007


Oh wait, I've figured it out. Gotta stop using the wiener to stir the cocoa.
posted by Astro Zombie at 4:47 PM on September 26, 2007


Nope.

If it turns green, then I'd worry.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:48 PM on September 26, 2007


Metal Fingers in My Body (nsfw - animated nudity)
posted by stifford at 4:49 PM on September 26, 2007 [1 favorite]


stifford, that was fucking hilarious. Literally.
posted by localroger at 4:56 PM on September 26, 2007


Hey, IRFH the penis definitely delivers in 24 hours or less. So I call FedEx.
posted by localroger at 4:57 PM on September 26, 2007


Whoa. Those pictures were... whoa. How do people think those things up?
posted by OverlappingElvis at 5:16 PM on September 26, 2007


Robot sex. (SFW)
posted by quin at 5:18 PM on September 26, 2007


Could this be the sex life of two things?
posted by Jon Mitchell at 5:27 PM on September 26, 2007


Those aren't robots.
posted by motty at 5:46 PM on September 26, 2007


All Is Full of Love by Bjork... my favourite video.
posted by autodidact at 5:51 PM on September 26, 2007


Sometimes I wonder if some art isn't just porn that nobody would masturbate to.
posted by Citizen Premier at 6:34 PM on September 26, 2007


Hey don't be forgetting the free robot sex.
posted by Webbster at 7:23 PM on September 26, 2007


I'm having a dickens of a time finding his website, and I'd really like to see more of his stuff. Really, I'd like to contact him about a piece that I'm writing. You MeFites have any ideas how I can ferret out his site?
posted by chinese_fashion at 8:28 PM on September 26, 2007


I too get my creative ideas from Futurama.
posted by Brocktoon at 10:37 PM on September 26, 2007


I read about this in Cabinet a few years ago; unfortunately, the article isn't available online. It was called "R.U.R. or R.U. Ain't My Baby: Three Approaches to Dehumanizing Sex" and was written by John Strausbaugh.

I think that the article made it sound significantly more interesting than the Wired article does; since I'm procrastinating about getting down to what I ought to be doing I reproduce some of it for your reading pleasure:
The production aesthetic is a handsomely grotesque retro-futurism—a little Ray Harryhausen, a little Fritz Lang, some Flesh Gordon and Iron Giant. The vision is Machine-Age dystopian. Sullivan's robots inhabit rusty industrial cities where, counter-intuitively, they seem to have little work to do, and have become in their indolence obsessed with sex. They pursue sex with the grim and mindless purposefulness of the assembly line.

An often deployed cliché during the golden age of pornography stated that the actors looked like soulless robots, puppets of flesh programmed to repeat a set series of sex acts in infinite peep-show loops. Sullivan has taken this to its absurd extreme. Like professional porn actors, his robots are anonymous and interchangeable. They will do anything, in any position, anytime. Unlike porn actors, they never take a lunch break or go limp or need lubrication.

"I think because robots don't need to have sex, it's pretty funny to think that they would want it," Sullivan explains. And his robots want it a lot. "They have the sexuality of dogs. They'll fuck any machine with a hole in it. It's the mechanical imperative—they reproduce by fucking instead of building more robots." They stage orgies and perform live sex acts and engage in mechanized versions of bestiality. Female robots pre-designed to appear pregnant shunt down an assembly line that installs fetal robots in their empty, rusty wombs. A huge penis-cannon sprays mechanical semen like buckshot, then the spermatozoa race through a maze toward a giant metallic egg. Some sperm give up in frustration and simply copulate with each other. Baby-doll robots observe the constant rutting of adult models and learn to play with their spring-loaded penises.

When Sullivan screens the footage he's completed to date—ten minute or so of discontinuous scenes, without soundtract—the effect, much like pornography with human performers, is alternately humorous and disturbing, but never "sexy." If traditional pornography is often dehumanizing, robot porn is thoroughly dehumanized. if pornography is sex without love, without passion, without joy or personality—sex reduced to the biomechanics of copulation—then The Sex Life of Robots is the ultimate skin flick. "There's actually very little sexy about it. I don't think anybody's going to be jerking off to this movie," Sullivan conjectures. Then he shrugs. "But you never know. Maybe there are robot fetishists who'd just be lining up for this."
posted by felix grundy at 11:26 AM on September 27, 2007 [1 favorite]


Um, some penises are brown.

Only the ones that are so frightening you are compelled to fellate them.
posted by Pollomacho at 11:35 AM on September 27, 2007


Sexed robots (actual robots this time)
posted by hattifattener at 2:21 PM on September 27, 2007






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