Comments on: Sex like a handshake

Sex like a handshake

imposster — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 11:48:49 -0800

Sex like a handshake (even baby sex?) Titilation and humor from Vanessa Woods, researcher at the Lola Bonobo sanctuary. (Previously)

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 11:55:23 -0800

She's talking about apes, and the tag says "apes". All is right in the world.

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:04:42 -0800

LOL a bonobo!

By: mert

mert — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:11:26 -0800

She sure put a lot of photos of herself on her blog.

By: desjardins

desjardins — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:19:18 -0800

"The trick is that if you open the window it pushes the banana off the ledge, so you have to reach around through the other window. [...] Benny the bonobo is the world champion of this game. [...] I failed it. Richard Wrangham, famous Harvard primatologist also failed it." I don't know if I want to read a book by someone who doesn't understand gravity. Maybe Benny will write a book.

By: roll truck roll

roll truck roll — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:21:09 -0800

I'd like to shake her hand.

By: Shanachie

Shanachie — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:52:38 -0800

"I'd like to shake her hand." Right there with ya.

By: Shanachie

Shanachie — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 12:53:10 -0800

Er... though not in a Bonobo sort of way...

By: electricinca

electricinca — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 13:39:23 -0800

I'm right there with you too and definitely in a Bonobo sort of way. Everything I read or see about Bonobos just makes me more fascinated by them, it is a terrible tragedy that they are endangered.

By: surfdad

surfdad — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 13:40:42 -0800

Got my Bonobo suit all ready, just need a canoe.

By: thehmsbeagle

thehmsbeagle — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 13:56:08 -0800

For a scientist, she sure has a lot of carefully posed headshots.

By: Smedleyman

Smedleyman — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 13:56:35 -0800

Oh, 'cmon, we're all thinking about how much we'd like to have easy consensual sex with multiple bonobos. Right? Right? Folks? Ahmana feel mighty silly if I'm the only one thinking about hot ape sex Canoeing thru a civil war zone to study apes is pretty impressive.

By: Slothrup

Slothrup — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 14:13:38 -0800

For a scientist, she sure has a lot of carefully posed headshots. *Everything* is about marketing. Plus, she's hawt in a run-naked-with-the-bonobos kind of way.

By: tommasz

tommasz — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 14:15:27 -0800

I don't find bonobo sex all that titillating. Am I missing something?

By: edgeways

edgeways — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 14:21:23 -0800

I kind wish we where closer related to Bonobos than the other chimps, less bashing in of heads to resolve strife, more sex.

By: cowboy_sally

cowboy_sally — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 14:23:04 -0800

For a scientist, she sure has a lot of carefully posed headshots. Unlike Jane Goodall. (Which is to say: And?)

By: jamjam

jamjam — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 14:32:34 -0800

If she contributes to saving them, I guess I'm willing to forgive her for being a beautiful young woman as well as a scientist.

By: Hicksu

Hicksu — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 15:37:36 -0800

Heart like a wheel

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 16:13:02 -0800

Make love not sticks with which to prod termite mounds.

By: TinkleBerry

TinkleBerry — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 17:49:12 -0800

This was a great article, really interesting. Bonobos are so human-like, it's a little disturbing. The females even have breasts that look like ours. I don't mean mine personally, but, you know. I'm working on writing a little story with a character who is a human/bonobo hybrid. Let's see, if the father's human that would be called a hum-obo, I guess. Or bono-man if the father's a Bonobo. Mules (and jinnys) are generally smarter than horses or donkeys, and ligers are bigger than lions or tigers, so I wonder if a hum-obo would be bigger and smarter than a human.

By: nickyskye

nickyskye — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 20:25:58 -0800

Vanessa Woods, er, comes to an interesting conclusion, "I get asked a lot whether bonobos are better than humans in any way. Usually I have a very long answer but I've narrowed it down. The female clitoris. Firstly, it is really big. It's so long, a female can wrap it around my finger. If our clitorises were as easy to find as a bonobo females, I think there would be a lot less problems world over."

By: null terminated

null terminated — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 20:44:40 -0800

ROGUE CLITORIS

By: bonobo

bonobo — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 20:53:16 -0800

**squeals** **points at thread while nodding her head emphatically**

By: Ynoxas

Ynoxas — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 21:02:42 -0800

Would it be bad taste to say I'd like to have monkey-sex with her? Because I would. But the bad taste might prevent me from saying it aloud. But probably not.

By: Ryvar

Ryvar — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 23:54:57 -0800

Why is it that our civilization denies us the benefit of any sense of adventure (ie heading out and slaughtering the neighboring tribe) AND denies us what seems the logical compensation for that (use sex to resolve all our problems)? Does anyone, after reading about bonobos, start to feel just a little bit gypped here?

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 02:16:32 -0800

Would it be bad taste to say I'd like to have monkey-sex with her? I could swear I once read an academic article on the high prevalence of female primatologists who have sex with the apes that they study. Unfortunately, I've never been able to find another reference to it, so it's fairly obvious that it was a figment of my perverse imagination, and yet if you watch any footage of them interacting with the apes in those lonely mountain locations, it does seem so goddam plausible.

By: Sparx

Sparx — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 03:29:02 -0800

I always dreamed of marrying a beautiful scientist, but I only ever get lucky with their mad daughters.

By: Western Infidels

Western Infidels — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 10:06:50 -0800

PeterMcDermott:...if you watch any footage of [female primatologists] interacting with the apes in those lonely mountain locations, [human-animal sex] seem[s] so goddam plausible.

You must be thinking of Orang-utans.

By: zoogleplex

zoogleplex — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 14:41:12 -0800

There are humans out there - a lot of them - who'd much rather hurt, dominate or kill other people than have sex. They literally get far less enjoyment from sex than they do from violence. And we wonder why things are so screwed up. Judging by what generally goes on in the world, there's a lot more of those people than we'd like to admit. Bad wiring.

By: zoogleplex

zoogleplex — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 14:46:23 -0800

From her site: "Chimpanzees live in violent male dominated societies. Sexual coercion and infanticide are common, as is war. Bonobos however, are peaceful and female dominated. There is no infanticide, sex is used to resolve all kinds of conflict, and bonobos do not have war." Hmm, whom do the chimps sound like? Thanks, evolution...

By: ZachsMind

ZachsMind — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 02:51:39 -0800

I can't recall where frankly, but some years ago I read about how research scientists learn communications skills with primates through body language, and some have even admitted to experimenting with flirting procedures, as sex is so integral to how and why they communicate, but the descriptions usually fall short of describing actual copulation. It's usually just playful flirtation and if the subject starts taking it too serious, the research scientist backs off. Or she just lets the chimp hump her leg. Presumably because either they don't really do it, or cuz they do, but admitting it would make the potential financial support representatives squrim uncomfortably and head for the next lecture without funding one's next trip to the boonies so you can fwoondangle with the danglefwoons. That made more sense before I started typing it. Suffice to say what happens in Las Bonobos stays in Las Bonobos. Unless of course Vanessa opts to tape it. Then all bets are off. "We're predicting that bonobos won't be scared of strangers because when they see a stranger they run up and have sex with them for 30 mins." From this scientist's findings I think we can finally put to rest the most offensive myth ever in the history of anything: Human beings are just not the smartest species on the planet. We have been beat out by a species which shares most of our DNA, but has a far better handle on what is and isn't important in this universe. Some human beings might SAY make love not war, but these little guys actually do that. I for one welcome our bonoboatic overlords. As for previous comments in here about wanting to 'shake hands' with the esteemed Ms. Woods esquire, "she graduated with a Masters of Science Communication from the Centre for the Public Awareness of Science at the Australian National University" and deserves a little more respect, even though she's a hottie. She's a brainy hottie... which actually makes her even more hot. Did you guys get a gander at her children's books? It's True, There Are Bugs in Your Bed, It's True, Space Turns You Into Spaghetti, It's True, Pirates ate rats... That's just too cute to fuck. Maybe a pillow fight.