Is that Sex Panther?

October 19, 2007 10:08 PM

Hai Karate.An aftershave so powerful, it will drive women right out of their minds. That's why we have to put instructions on self defense in every package. More from Wikipedia.
posted by Astro Zombie (23 comments total)

Suck it, Axe!
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:16 PM on October 19, 2007

HAI LOL111!
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:24 PM on October 19, 2007

So.... this stuff smells like bacon? Bacon double cheese In-and-Out Burgers? With bacon? Because then that response from the flesh-gnawing women would make perfet sense to me.


Mmmm... bacon wrapped geek....
posted by maryh at 10:29 PM on October 19, 2007 [1 favorite has favorites]

Gosh Dangit!

Why must people remind me of the fact that the only thing keeping Texas from perfection is its paucity of In-and-Out Burgers?

I hate you people.

(Have a few double doubles for me.)
posted by Faux Real at 11:23 PM on October 19, 2007

Look kids, I got those damn instructions, and if you don't get the fuck off my lawn, I'm going to have to demonstrate on your silly head!
posted by Goofyy at 12:04 AM on October 20, 2007

That first link is hilarious. I like the self-satisfied look he gives the camera after he inadvertently smashes the coffee table. It's like Saturday Night Live at its best. I vaguely remember that commercial from my blurry brathood, actually. This image is good, too. A fine post, indeed, Astro Zombie.
posted by wsg at 1:15 AM on October 20, 2007

Astro Zombie - are you a Don & Mike listener by any chance? They were ripping on Hai Karate earlier this week - seemed like an odd coincidence (unless you and they are all part of some larger LOLHAIKARATE meme that I am not aware of).
posted by kcds at 3:35 AM on October 20, 2007

I think Brut was my first cologne, but everyone wanted some Hai Karate. Despite being completely in the target market, I can honestly say I never, ever had to fend off an unwanted advance from a woman while wearing it.

Not that any advance from a woman would have been unwanted.
posted by tommasz at 6:06 AM on October 20, 2007

are all part of some larger LOLHAIKARATE meme that I am not aware of

Another data point: Craig Ferguson did a Hai Karate joke last night in his monologue.
posted by flickroad at 6:46 AM on October 20, 2007

Craig Ferguson did a great bit on this last night on the Late Late Show.
posted by caddis at 6:56 AM on October 20, 2007

LOLHAIKARATE meme

I've been talking about it quite a lot this year in various adforums (including my own) since the current Axe/Tag campaigns seem to have stolen the Hai Karate strategy right off the bat, so it's probably just "out there" right now. Ifyaknowwhatimean.
posted by dabitch at 7:42 AM on October 20, 2007

Those were among my favorite commercials as a kid. I would often be inspired upon seeing them to leap round the living room HAI-AH!-ing everything in site. Thanks for the post!
posted by The Deej at 8:17 AM on October 20, 2007

Ferguson is my source.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:21 AM on October 20, 2007

"So.... this stuff smells like bacon?"

Okay, that's it. I'm quitting my technology job, getting together with a few of my friends, and setting up baconscent.com. Hmm, I wonder if maple is as bad an idea as it sounds...
posted by majick at 8:29 AM on October 20, 2007

He thinks DNA is pretty
CGI makes him giddy
He'll only listen to the mono version of Surf City
He smells like Hai Karate
Says Mulder wasn't dotty
I want to rip the clothes right off his ectomorphic body

Just four little eyes and I'm weak in the knees
I want to live his junior high fantasies
Just one giant brain and I'm his unopened toy
I'm just a sucker for a nerdy boy

- Candypants, Nerdy Boy
posted by FunkyHelix at 8:43 AM on October 20, 2007

I just knew that these bacon underpants would come in handy some day.


Hey, wait. Hi doggie. Good doggie. No, down boy! BAD DOGGIE. BAD! NO BACON FOR YOU! A LITTLE HELP? ANYONE!? AAAAHHHHHHGHGH.
posted by loquacious at 11:59 AM on October 20, 2007

The British versions of the ads were legendary... The star, Valerie Leon, (interview) was a (minor) Bond girl and turned up in several of the Carry On films and lots of other places. She's still working.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 1:12 PM on October 20, 2007

I remember seeing one of the commercials (I guess for the 'Oriental Lime', but I can't find it online right now) where the guy delivers a solid 'chop' to a lime, squeezing it into a bottle. Always made me laugh.

Oh, and loquacious, I don't like what you're implying...

Although bacon does sound good...
posted by pupdog at 2:59 PM on October 20, 2007

Little known fact: instead of hiring a fight trainer for Karate Kid, the producers made Ralph Macchio wear Hai Karate 24/7. Whilst this made the choreography more believable, it also had a toll on his personal life; after a particularly liberal "spritzing", his high school best friend Samantha Dooligan ended up in a bodybag - the ultimate irony for the All Valley Champion.
posted by leo. at 3:22 PM on October 20, 2007

The first linked ad, as well as many equally amazing ads from the 50s through 70s are collected in Rhino's excellent "Commercial Mania". I highly recommend it.

Also see: more vintage television ads on youtube.
posted by churl at 6:47 PM on October 20, 2007

Ferguson is my source.

Wasn't he good? Your post was great too. These were such funny commercials. You can not imagine the number of Hai Karate kicks, chops etc. youngsters inflicted upon one another, not to mention the cheesy pick-up lines etc. It was a cultural phenomena and between you and Ferguson you captured it well.
posted by caddis at 6:54 PM on October 20, 2007

I'm quitting my technology job, getting together with a few of my friends, and setting up baconscent.com. Hmm, I wonder if maple is as bad an idea as it sounds...

Already been done. I can't find the URL, but there's a site that sells lots of weird perfumes -- bubble gum, cotton candy, soil, bacon, all sorts of scents.
posted by hjo3 at 10:15 PM on October 20, 2007

The star, Valerie Leon, was a (minor) Bond girl and turned up in several of the Carry On films and lots of other places.

Including arguably the finest episode of The Goodies, in which she reprised her aftershave-ad role, in this case pursuing and eventually beating up Tim Brooke-Taylor.
posted by dansdata at 8:24 AM on October 21, 2007