Bradypus lotharius, amirite?

October 24, 2007 3:27 AM

A brief video about a philandering sloth who wears a necktie.
posted by tepidmonkey (38 comments total)

What a great song. I really didn't appreciate it properly when I was a kid.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 3:53 AM on October 24, 2007

Beautiful.
posted by MrMustard at 3:58 AM on October 24, 2007

Apparently this is viral marketing for Alfa Romeo, though I can't figure out how. I guess if I could, it wouldn't be effective viral marketing. (The viral part obviously works, eh, tepidmonkey? But I'm not complaining). Apparently the guy playing the sloth was the stunt double for Frodo in LotR. Really. See http://www.cerberoleso.it/showreel/sloth.htm for more info.
posted by ubiquity at 4:01 AM on October 24, 2007

I'm guessing after a suitable interval (days?) the sloth will appear in another video sexing it up in an Alfa.
posted by seanmpuckett at 4:24 AM on October 24, 2007

Viral marketing? If this were viral marketing, I'd be all for it.

As is, the post's link title is, well almost all you gotta know. It's a perfect internet thing, otherwise. Funny, and without overt referrents... sweet.
posted by From Bklyn at 4:25 AM on October 24, 2007

A brief video about a philandering sloth who wears a necktie.

I was half-expecting to see Hillary Clinton standing next to him.
posted by three blind mice at 4:26 AM on October 24, 2007

Warning: Direct link to .MOV file.
posted by DU at 4:30 AM on October 24, 2007

Chicks dig the deadly sins.
posted by srboisvert at 4:39 AM on October 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

God, I want a sloth so bad.
posted by Brittanie at 4:41 AM on October 24, 2007

Nice.
posted by nola at 4:57 AM on October 24, 2007

posted by seanmpuckett I'm guessing after a suitable interval (days?) the sloth will appear in another video sexing it up in an Alfa.

In the new video, the woman will be slightly older, the aimless and philandering sloth will drive a red Alfa convertible, and it will be titled The Gradual.
posted by fandango_matt at 5:12 AM on October 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

Sloths don't move very quickly. The comedy should have revolved more around that and the fact that they are kinda ugly at first but the more you look at them the more attractive they get. WHEN WILL SOMEONE MAKE AN ACCURATE SLOTH PARODY!

The song is Mr. Blue Sky by ELO. It's the happiest song ever written. I think they should use it as the hold music on suicide hot lines.
posted by any major dude at 5:38 AM on October 24, 2007

That was mildly strange
posted by Mastercheddaar at 5:42 AM on October 24, 2007

I still can't figure out what the chicks seen in that guy anyway.
posted by psmealey at 5:58 AM on October 24, 2007

In French, they are called Paresseux (Lazy). Anyway, looks like viral propaganda.
posted by nicolin at 6:01 AM on October 24, 2007

Here's the hook:
Despite his appearance and reputation, he's obviously an Alfa male.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 6:18 AM on October 24, 2007 [3 favorites]

I was expecting there to be a moral to the story. Like the one blonde chick sees him making eyes with some other girl, and storms out of the club after slapping him in his leering, slothy face.

But then I realized the video was made by Italians.
posted by bookish at 6:37 AM on October 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

I kept worrying he was going to shank my mom with a pterodactyl dick bone.
posted by jonson at 6:59 AM on October 24, 2007

Is this something I would need an acacia tree to understand?
posted by rusty at 7:09 AM on October 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

I approve.
posted by slimepuppy at 7:58 AM on October 24, 2007

I'm with you, bookish. At first I thought this video was going to be like "Check out this shameless sloth," but then I realized it was more like "Check out this awesome sloth."
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 8:12 AM on October 24, 2007

The next video will be one long sequence of him driving from home to the mechanic and back.
posted by photoslob at 8:25 AM on October 24, 2007

The only animal more awesome than the sloth is the manatee.
posted by tommasz at 8:32 AM on October 24, 2007

Good grief, the comedian's a bear!

/coat
posted by dogsbody at 8:48 AM on October 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

No he's a-not! He's a-wearing a neck-a-tie!

(Damn you dogsbody, I was just going there.)
posted by Sk4n at 9:28 AM on October 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

Also - the brief scene in the disco when they are at the table, all I could think of was that the sloth was going to shoot first.
posted by Sk4n at 9:29 AM on October 24, 2007 [1 favorite]

Cool - it makes me want to be back in Barcelona, where the drinks are plentiful, the women beautiful, and the sloths lucky.
posted by Staggering Jack at 9:35 AM on October 24, 2007

My Italian correspondent informs me that there have already been several more obvious Alfa ads featuring the intrepid (and sometimes misnamed) sloth.
posted by ubiquity at 10:02 AM on October 24, 2007

Che schifo.
posted by tepidmonkey at 10:16 AM on October 24, 2007

Anderson Cooper: Liberator of Sloths

(watch your head)
posted by maryh at 11:06 AM on October 24, 2007

In the new video, the woman will be slightly older, the aimless and philandering sloth will drive a red Alfa convertible, and it will be titled The Gradual.

Fandango for the win!
posted by Zinger at 11:09 AM on October 24, 2007

Okay, that's cute; the actual commercials do play on the idea of the sloth being incredibly slow, like any major dude wanted above. Thanks.
posted by yhbc at 11:21 AM on October 24, 2007

I can't put my finger on it, but something didn't seem right. We are going to have to test this; I'm gonna need a sloth, a shitload of alcohol, and a dance-club.

It may seem unnecessary, but this is for Science! damn it.
posted by quin at 11:31 AM on October 24, 2007

What a great song. I really didn't appreciate it properly when I was a kid.

It was also used in a VW commercial. It is a great song; Jeff Lynn loves him some "Penny Lane."

A brief video about a philandering sloth who wears a necktie.
I thought it'd be Homer Simpson, but despite his many other flaws he isn't a philanderer.
posted by kirkaracha at 12:01 PM on October 24, 2007

Sloths are the new black guys. Stupid lucky-ass sloths taking all our women.
posted by racist dunk-tank clown at 3:41 PM on October 24, 2007

I never thought I'd get to tell this story.

Sloths are not harmless. Sloths are powerful, hungry, vicious, violent creatures. Anything you might think you know about sloths is probably wrong, and is further skewed by ridiculous pro-sloth propaganda like this video (which obviously features not a sloth, but a midget in a sloth suit - seen it a thousand times.)

I was deep in the Peruvian Amazon basin in 1998. The rains had come and our dugout was taking on water, fast. We moved closer to shore in case we had to swim when the guide noticed a small palm leaning out over the water. It was bizarre, because the foliage seemed to make a flat green wall separating the water from the forest. This one small tree seemed to be leaping out from the forest, canopy first.
Turns out, a sloth had climbed to the top of the tree and had stretched the damned thing out over the river.
"Good news!" the guide reported. "Sloth is good to have!"
Apparently, it was time to have a sloth.
We paddled up next to the tree and the guide reached up and grabbed the slimy beast. He motioned to me to stand and then he placed it on my chest.
The sloth instinctively clinged to my chest.
The canoe began to rock.
People began to bail out more water.
The sloth began to squeeze.
It squeezed, and squeezed, and squeezed until I thought my collar bones would crumple like toilet-paper tubes. It squeezed the air out of my lungs.
It's bear-like arms crushed my chest and its four vicious claws began to furrow my flesh.
I had no air with which to scream. As the canoe rocked precariously, I squeeked. I squeeked - "Please! Help! Help!"
Gradually, people started to look at me.
"Look, look! He can't hold the sloth!"
I began to suffocate.
"Look! The sloth is hurting him!"
I felt its dire claws puncture the muscles in my shoulders.
"Look at the little nancy boy! Afraid of a little sloth!"
...
After what seemed like hours, the guide tore the damned thing off of me - the whole time laughing, laughing, laughing. A sloth is a filthy creature covered in green slime, it leaves anyone it touches with an unforgettable odor.

But that night.... that night at the village...
we feasted on fat, thick, rich sloth-meat. It was perfectly ripe with deliciously veal-like fatty goodness... as though the sloth had been careful not to work his muscles too hard... his slothly meats were like mana and to this day I have never tasted anything so absolutely wondrous.

yes... i was mauled by a sloth. But he was a delicious, wonderful sloth. And I regret nothing.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 10:42 PM on October 24, 2007 [2 favorites]

Sloth: Just Because It's Slimy, Green And Filthy Doesn't Mean It Won't Be The New Bacon
posted by maryh at 1:30 AM on October 25, 2007

The Mr. Sloth ad series was cute the first time I saw it, but the other 90 bajilion times was just 'meh'. The first of the Peugeot ladybugs series still makes me chuckle, though.
posted by romakimmy at 4:48 AM on October 25, 2007