Comments on: Cooking the Books

Cooking the Books

brain_drain — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 09:43:46 -0800

Multinational food and pharmaceutical company Podrovka is cooking its books -- literally. Its latest annual report includes a section that must be baked in the oven before it can be read.

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:00:46 -0800

That's a rare idea for this medium.

By: sciurus

sciurus — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:01:47 -0800

Well done, Faint of Butt.

By: ClanvidHorse

ClanvidHorse — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:04:27 -0800

And it was posted on the blue.

By: ClanvidHorse

ClanvidHorse — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:05:15 -0800

I'll get me coat.

By: brain_drain

brain_drain — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:07:20 -0800

If it's a double, sorry folks -- but my searches came up (and still come up) empty.

By: thewalrusispaul

thewalrusispaul — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:10:05 -0800

If I try to microwave it'll come out all limp and soggy, won't it?

By: languagehat

languagehat — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 10:22:35 -0800

Very interesting! (Pay no attention to people who claim something is a double but can't be bothered to find and link to the original; it's lazy and impolite.)

By: Lucinda

Lucinda — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:08:22 -0800

I thought "blue" referred to a temperature of meat; isn't it "really really really just about raw" or something like that?

By: yhbc

yhbc — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:20:37 -0800

Looks like it does (scroll down to "blue rare"), although I hadn't heard the term before either. Apparently ClanvidHorse is not lazy and impolite, just very, very esoteric as regards puns and cookery.

By: nzero

nzero — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:40:26 -0800

Pharmaceutical company? Forgive my ignorance, but in what way is Podravka a pharmaceutical company?

By: nzero

nzero — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:42:35 -0800

Cancel that, I figured it out.

By: ClanvidHorse

ClanvidHorse — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:49:23 -0800

yeah, it was a stupid pun following on from the other ones from FaintofButt and sciurus. As for the 'I'll get me coat' bit, it was a reference to an early 90s UK sketch show (The Fast Show) when someone says something rubbish and leaves the room (me in this case). With my bean-counting head on though I can't see for the life of me why a company would go to this expense and effort with their accounts. I am sure most shareholders don't want a flashy box (cos it's their money down the drain) and I can't see how what purpose it serves other than to win a few meaningless design awards. Nice idea but can't see analysts going crazy for the numbers because it's in a nice box. As for 'blue' steak, I have had the misfortune to try this at the behest of a chef (it's illegal to get steak blue in the UK) when I used to work in a hotel. It tasted ok but I had the sorest stomach afterwards. I think the surface of the steak had been sealed for 15 seconds each side (if that).

By: wendell

wendell — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 12:04:16 -0800

Thanks for the link, yhbc. You and ClanvidHorse and Lucinda have taught me a new culinary term - "blue rare" - that I will probably never use because I tend to overcook everything. I didn't see the original comment and jump to the conclusion that it was 'calling out a double', but rather as a joke making a reference I didn't 'get'. But then, I'm lazy and impolite myself. I'm just glad the actual financial numbers are not in the temperature-sensitive book, because some people would obviously try to improve them by overcooking... from raw red to blackened.

By: longdaysjourney

longdaysjourney — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 13:57:14 -0800

So I take it they had a good year?

By: kcds

kcds — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 15:39:01 -0800

Wendell mentions "red raw to blackened" and that reminds me there is a style of cooking steak where the outside is charred and the inside very, very rare that is referred to as black and blue, apparently also known as Pittsburgh style.

By: tellurian

tellurian — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 15:42:58 -0800

With my bean-counting head on though I can't see for the life of me why a company would go to this expense and effort with their accounts. I had never heard of this company before. Now I have been to their website and looked at their products. It turns out that I have tried one of their products in the past (Vegeta stock). I didn't like it much (too salty) and none of their other products appeal to me, but they might have. That aside, just the fact that I visited their site to see what they were about tells me that the gimmicky book is working.

By: tellurian

tellurian — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 16:05:49 -0800

On further perusal, I could probably go for Kviki Salty Sticks. I'd share them too, "Hey girl, you want a Kviki?"

By: wendell

wendell — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 19:15:49 -0800

"Hey girl, you want a Kviki?" I hear that in the voice of Arte Johnson's character on Laugh-In and wish I could wack tellurian with Ruth Buzzi's handbag.

By: tellurian

tellurian — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 21:31:26 -0800

heh! I loved that show when I was a kid. Tyrone F. Horneigh [falls off the park bench]

By: wendell

wendell — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 22:11:25 -0800

Ten point bonus for correct spelling of the character's name!!! *socks it to tellurian* Wolfgang: Ver-r-r-r-ry interesting. But a total derail. Lucy, I still love you - meet me at the Smoke House for a blue steak and a baked annual report for two. Gary Owens: This program was prerecorded to give the cast time to get through airport security and onto the next plane to Croatia. ©1969 George Schlatter/Ed Friendly Productions