count the number of black men on "black men" magazine covers...

November 29, 2007 10:47 PM

black men magazine ("for strong, positive, caring brothers") has published six issues this year. (all 2007 covers here) the number of black men on their cover: zero. (the same is true for their 2006, 2005 and 2004 covers.) (more inside...)

"O, The Oprah Magazine" on the other hand has featured mrs. winfrey on every single of its 79 covers to date, though not on all over her O at home covers.

other magazine covers that usually don't depict what their titles might suggest: redbook (zero red books), harpers (no harpers recently), domino (no dominos ever).

posted by krautland (51 comments total)

Indeed!
posted by alexei at 10:52 PM on November 29, 2007

Plus, they don't use capital letters. Let's make fun of them!
posted by LarryC at 10:53 PM on November 29, 2007

Very few boys on the covers of Playboy.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:54 PM on November 29, 2007 [4 favorites]

pretty soon you're going to tell me that playboy doesn't put boys on its cover. You seem to have bizzare expectations from pornographers.
posted by allen.spaulding at 10:55 PM on November 29, 2007 [1 favorite]

damn you panda person
posted by allen.spaulding at 10:56 PM on November 29, 2007

Just out of curiosity, am I supposed to be outraged? I was expecting to see a bunch of white men on the cover. I just saw a bunch of women.

Maybe I'm just not understanding.
posted by robtf3 at 11:00 PM on November 29, 2007

Strangely, before clicking through, I expected a GQ-style magazine, a lifestyle guide, Esquire-ish thing, not a run-of-the-mill men's magazine. I feel misled and would like to unsubscribe from all of these newsletters.
posted by cgc373 at 11:00 PM on November 29, 2007

Oh, also, this is a very, very, very cool website, which is, I hope, the point of the post. All of these cover scans in one place: Good stuff.
posted by cgc373 at 11:02 PM on November 29, 2007

righto, playboy should have been on that list as well.
I picked out 'black men' because of the pseudo-aspirational subtitle. if they had been just straight-up tittiness...
posted by krautland at 11:04 PM on November 29, 2007

This is further evidence that MetaFilter isn't much of a filter.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 11:04 PM on November 29, 2007

outraged? no, amused was the point. confused perhaps.
posted by krautland at 11:04 PM on November 29, 2007

Not that there's anything wrong with women. There's not. I'm still lost though.
posted by robtf3 at 11:06 PM on November 29, 2007

Oh yeah, I'm definitely amused. I just thought I was missing something.

And I'm always confused.
posted by robtf3 at 11:08 PM on November 29, 2007

missing something: fair enough. I wished there was a bigger punch myself but it's just something I noticed in passing tonight at the grocery store.

btw: the person expecting GQ was correct. that's exactly what they put it next to on the shelf.
posted by krautland at 11:10 PM on November 29, 2007

Women are on magazine covers a lot. Discuss.
posted by ALongDecember at 11:22 PM on November 29, 2007

And how come I've never been on the cover of Self?
posted by ALongDecember at 11:26 PM on November 29, 2007 [7 favorites]

We've never been on Us, have we?
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 11:36 PM on November 29, 2007

To be fair, People usually does have, y'know, people on its covers.
posted by Rangeboy at 11:38 PM on November 29, 2007 [1 favorite]

First Black Men, then PlayBoy, next thing you'll be telling me is that there are never any hustlers on the cover of Hustler! I give up, I'm sticking to Maxim. I love all those proverbs and pithy witticisms.
posted by XMLicious at 11:40 PM on November 29, 2007 [2 favorites]

krautland, you need to found a gentlemen's magazine called Straight-Up Tittyness.
posted by XMLicious at 11:43 PM on November 29, 2007 [2 favorites]

Women's magazines have women on the cover, and they sell like hotcakes. So why shouldn't men's magazines have women on the cover, too?
posted by infinitewindow at 12:00 AM on November 30, 2007

I've always been baffled by Oprah's magazine -- who the hell puts themselves on the cover of their own magazine? Is there anyone else who's attempted such an insane, yet strangely accepted, feat?

Besides, doesn't Oprah have her people photoshop her head onto a different body?

So many questions...
posted by spiderskull at 12:08 AM on November 30, 2007

Straight-Up Tittyness.
and to qualify you need to have gravity-defying assets?
posted by krautland at 12:09 AM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

But there are usually people on the cover of People.
posted by Meatbomb at 12:14 AM on November 30, 2007

I like poo.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 12:16 AM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

I think Andy Rooney already posted this.
posted by 2sheets at 12:20 AM on November 30, 2007 [5 favorites]

Penthouse forum is not a great place to discuss luxury apartments.

Mad magazine has never made me angry.

Sports Illustrated should probably change it's name to Sports photographed.

My biggest disappointment? Barely Legal magazine has never had a bear on the cover.
posted by billyfleetwood at 12:20 AM on November 30, 2007

Mad magazine has never made me angry.

Really? Have you tried reading it lately? Bill Gaines is spinning in his grave so fast it's warping local spacetime.
posted by lekvar at 12:38 AM on November 30, 2007

I envision Rude Titties Illustrated being a largely Home-and-Garden centered publication.
posted by Avenger at 1:07 AM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

And The Nation? Just a magazine! Sooooo confusing.
posted by wemayfreeze at 1:45 AM on November 30, 2007

I've never seen a single jug on the cover of Juggs.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:51 AM on November 30, 2007

When will we see Oprah reaching the "big O" on O magazine?
posted by dasheekeejones at 4:10 AM on November 30, 2007

I've never seen a digestive picture on Readers Digest either.
posted by doctorschlock at 4:15 AM on November 30, 2007

Now I'm thinking about what Kane said in the movie,
'Citizen Kane'. "Rosebud". The legend goes that it was about a
womens love knob. So that means that Kane died thinking about pussy.
I just thought I'd throw that in because of this topic of men's magazines.
posted by doctorschlock at 4:19 AM on November 30, 2007

Hey! The Beano never had a picture of Beano on the cover either. (I swear, the first nerd that post a July 3rd, 1983 [collectors edition] cover of The Beano with Dennis The Menace eating a plate of beans on it gets tasered).
posted by tellurian at 5:01 AM on November 30, 2007

I like poo

Odd you mention this. There was a magazine called either I Like Poo or We Like Poo in the 90s. I think they only did two issues. (And yes, I'm serious.)
posted by dobbs at 5:54 AM on November 30, 2007

The cover of Juggs has never featured moonshine bottles nor hillbilly musical groups.
posted by Pollomacho at 6:05 AM on November 30, 2007

Also, "Hooters" restaurant is called "Hooters".

Wait. I'm doing this wrong.
posted by Avenger at 6:12 AM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

After viewing enough of those magazines, I'm pretty sure lots of men eventually end up on the covers...

grody.
posted by aftermarketradio at 6:49 AM on November 30, 2007

One Sunday morning my buddy Mel and I were in a convenience store buying milk and Cheetos when a young woman walked in and asked the guy behind the counter if he had the Sunday Chicago Tribune.
"Nope, sorry."
"O.K., give me "Hustler Busty" then."
I don't think that was her on the cover.
posted by Floydd at 7:18 AM on November 30, 2007

Is there anyone else who's attempted such an insane, yet strangely accepted, feat?

If there's a person on the cover of Martha Stewart Living, it's Martha Stewart. And Rachel Ray's new magazine has Rachel on the cover every time I've seen it in stores.

These women are basically building empires of aesthetics built around their own cult of personality. Putting themselves on the cover only makes sense.
posted by jacquilynne at 7:27 AM on November 30, 2007

Yes, and Metafilter is neither meta, nor filter. Discuss.
posted by blue_beetle at 8:23 AM on November 30, 2007

Those cover images were so heavily Photoshopped that they actually may have started out as photos of black men.
posted by miss lynnster at 8:41 AM on November 30, 2007 [6 favorites]

wait... Rosebud was his sled.

Or am I missing something?
posted by lunit at 9:05 AM on November 30, 2007

Clearly you should be picking up Bust instead. Unless you're looking for sculpture.
posted by casarkos at 10:08 AM on November 30, 2007

Meow.
posted by chunking express at 10:41 AM on November 30, 2007

In related news, Jet magazine never featured jets on their covers.
posted by JJ86 at 10:55 AM on November 30, 2007

I've never seen a single jug on the cover of Juggs.

Yeah, it's aways pairs, for some reason.

And I always feel somewhat disappointed when I go to Mellon Bank.
posted by Crabby Appleton at 11:02 AM on November 30, 2007

Really? Have you tried reading it lately? Bill Gaines is spinning in his grave so fast it's warping local spacetime.

I'll see your spinning Bill Gaines and raise you a gyroscopic Harvey Kurtzman corpse.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 12:26 PM on November 30, 2007

For the record, it's Ms. Winfrey. She's not married.
posted by veronica sawyer at 11:52 AM on December 1, 2007

And on the topic of ironies, how about the fact that Michael Jackson's on the cover of Ebony?
posted by veronica sawyer at 11:55 AM on December 1, 2007