Tanks for the Holidays.
December 8, 2007 11:12 PM   Subscribe

 
Tank you for the interesting link.
posted by mullacc at 11:16 PM on December 8, 2007


Doesn't Richard D. James own a Ferret Mark 2 armored vehicle?
posted by p3on at 11:24 PM on December 8, 2007


Customers Who Bought Items Like This Also Bought
Page 1 of 12 (Start over)

Basic bulb Anal Douche easy to use Rectal Syringe for anus Hyg...
2.0 out of 5 stars (1) $11.95

Anal Douche Rectal Syringe Easy to Use and Clean
4.8 out of 5 stars (4) $17.95

Enema Syringe Anal Douche Rectal Syringe
$17.95

Vulcanite Anal Douche Rectal Syringe bulb type.
4.0 out of 5 stars (1) $18.95

SILK Micro G-String Thong Rings Panty 4 COLORS Red Cobalt Purp...
3.6 out of 5 stars (17)

Basic bulb Anal Douche easy to use Rectal Syringe for anus Hyg...
2.0 out of 5 stars (1) $11.95

Helpful indexing there, Amazon.
posted by cmgonzalez at 11:31 PM on December 8, 2007 [2 favorites]


Also, that thing totally looks like a giant iron. All we need is a car, a giant thimble, and a dog, and we could have a Monopoly game.
posted by cmgonzalez at 11:33 PM on December 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


You could have a Monopoly game to the death like that one episode of Amazing Stories.
posted by shadow vector at 11:39 PM on December 8, 2007


cmgonzales, digg had a link showing those same associations for a 'fresh dead rabbit' -- which of course sent the diggers into a craze of speculation about just what, exactly, people were planning to DO with those dead rabbits.

Now that it's doing the same thing on the tank, I suspect these are things that have never actually been bought, and there's a bug in the association algorithm... though why, precisely, it's choosing THOSE things is a bit of a mystery. :)
posted by Malor at 11:39 PM on December 8, 2007


I want this tank: http://www.tankchair.com/
posted by spaceman_spiff at 11:48 PM on December 8, 2007 [1 favorite]


You'll shoot your eye out, kid...
posted by pupdog at 11:53 PM on December 8, 2007


I understand your interests, bigmusic. Really, I do. Nothing makes a Radio Flyer's allure recede faster on Christmas morning, than an armored, tracked vehicle, with provenance.

But I can't help but feel that an FN Five-seveN would be so much more useful, in most "shall issue" states.
posted by paulsc at 11:57 PM on December 8, 2007


That's why I drive a tank, yeah.
posted by dhammond at 11:57 PM on December 8, 2007


These are most likely expensive. You probably want to buy one before the market tanks.
posted by spiderskull at 12:58 AM on December 9, 2007


I want an M1A1 tank for Christmas
Only an M1A1 tank will do
Don't want a doll, no dinky Tinker Toy
I want an M1A1 tank to crush kill and destroy

I want an M1A1 tank for Christmas
I don't think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won't have to use our dirty chimney flue
Just drive it through the front door,
that's the easy thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see an M1 Abrams parked right there

I want an M1A1 tank for Christmas
Only an M1A1 tank will do
No Panzer II's, no T-34's,
They're pretty old, no one drives them anymore,
And M1A1 tanks are sort of new

Mom says that I'll be shot and then I'm done,
But I'll be safe inside depleted uranium

There's lots of room for it out behind the shed
and if you piss me off it won't be long before you're dead

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see an M1 Abrams parked right there

I want an M1A1 tank for Christmas
Only an M1A1 tank will do
No Panzer II's, no T-34's,
They're pretty old, no one drives them anymore,
I'll also take a used M1A2!
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 1:04 AM on December 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


My old roommates would be all over this, in a very real and not kidding way. One of them bought an old military 18 wheeler and tried to park it on our quiet residential street, much to the fucking chagrin of our neighbors.

Anyway... don't show this them. I will all end in tears.
posted by louche mustachio at 1:43 AM on December 9, 2007


THIS Amazon tank link has the most hilarious "Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed" list. (not the Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought list, which is just scary)
posted by parallax7d at 3:44 AM on December 9, 2007


Read the reviews on the amazon link for lulz. Hilarious.
posted by goo at 4:01 AM on December 9, 2007


who do you think you are, David Blaine?
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 5:13 AM on December 9, 2007


oh.
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 5:13 AM on December 9, 2007


bang bang, not glub glub.
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 5:13 AM on December 9, 2007


Please buy me a tank for Christmas.

Maybe you should have asked for one at Tanksgiving.

Sorry, that was terrible. ;-)
posted by warby at 5:34 AM on December 9, 2007 [1 favorite]




What is really amazing is that they have 2 in stock.
posted by 45moore45 at 7:43 AM on December 9, 2007


The badonkadonk is a pretty lame vehicle though. It's basically just a golf cart with some fake-rusty sheetmetal attached. Please if someone you know fancies tanks, please buy them an actual military vehicle for christmas.
posted by Authorized User at 7:48 AM on December 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


The Badonkadonk! I came across this term some time back as a result of trying to figure out the weird slang in this video. I had never heard the term before, and first tried spelling it "padunkadunk" or some such. Eventually I hit on "badonkadonk" and up came the Amazon tank.

I heard Joe Rogan use the term in describing a UFC fighter once.

I've yet to work the term "travlin'-ass mud shark" into conversation.
posted by Tube at 9:31 AM on December 9, 2007


Okay. WTF.

A week ago we had this, complete with anal douches and Customer Reviews that are way too well-written to be be random. (Consider your average Internet comment.) There's just no way 20 random people on the internets can write that consistently or well. It's clearly coordinated, spiked, or whatever you call it.

The tank reviews from the last link read exactly the same.

Is there a comedy site somewhere setting all these up, complete with all the necessary Reviewers and such in advance? Are they MeFites? Is this performance art? What the hell?

PS I also would like a tank pls thx. In periwinkle blue if it's not too much trouble.
posted by rokusan at 9:59 AM on December 9, 2007


Check out the other things the 6hp (yes, 6hp) Badonk manufacturer makes.
posted by eye of newt at 10:24 AM on December 9, 2007


Is there a comedy site somewhere setting all these up, complete with all the necessary Reviewers and such in advance?

It's an elaborate 4chan joke. They also engineered the reviews that led to this.
posted by cmgonzalez at 4:30 PM on December 9, 2007


the 'smallville' dvd next to the male thongs was a nice touch...
posted by geos at 5:20 PM on December 9, 2007


But I can't help but feel that an FN Five-seveN would be so much more useful, in most "shall issue" states.

Each crew member within a properly-equipped tank will have sidearms, along with one or two longarms nowadays. And that's not even counting the mounted Browning .50cal and the two M240s.

Plus, a tank can crush a car, among other things.

When I was in the service, almost exactly twenty years ago, our M1A1 armor company bought an old junked car, and we drove over it. Yes, that's where your tax money was going in the Reagan years.

The only problem with owning one of these would be the gas bill. At three gallons per mile.
posted by me & my monkey at 5:40 PM on December 9, 2007


But I'll be safe inside depleted uranium

I don't think this is used in the armor, only in the antitank rounds.
posted by me & my monkey at 5:46 PM on December 9, 2007


U.S. Government Subpoenaed Amazon.com to Obtain Book Purchasing Records

These Anal Douche Terrorists can run, but they can't hide.
posted by homunculus at 7:39 PM on December 9, 2007


the correlation for the anal items is obvious to me. Badonkadonk means booty or ass and all the listed products are for said Ass.
posted by Megafly at 11:29 AM on December 10, 2007


Anal sex toys + tanks for sale = My boss: "How are those related? How are those on amazon? (pause) You'd better send me that link."

If I weren't so completely weirded out, I'd be thankful
posted by foxywombat at 12:26 PM on December 10, 2007


More tanky goodness from a previous post. I particularly like the motorcycle version.
posted by quin at 3:41 PM on December 10, 2007


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