Mitchell Report

December 13, 2007 9:59 AM

Dead guy, 49 others implicated in baseball steroid scandal.

Here's the list as it's currently rumored:

· Brady Anderson

· Manny Alexander

· Rick Ankiel

· Jeff Bagwell

· Barry Bonds

· Aaron Boone

· Rafael Bettancourt

· Bret Boone

· Milton Bradley

· David Bell

· Dante Bichette

· Albert Belle

· Paul Byrd

· Wil Cordero

· Ken Caminiti

· Mike Cameron

· Ramon Castro

· Jose Canseco

· Ozzie Canseco

· Roger Clemens

· Paxton Crawford

· Wilson Delgado

· Lenny Dykstra

· Johnny Damon

· Carl Everett

· Kyle Farnsworth

· Ryan Franklin

· Troy Glaus

· Rich Garces

· Jason Grimsley

· Juan Gonzalez

· Eric Gagne

· Nomar Garciaparra

· Jason Giambi

· Jeremy Giambi

· Jose Guillen

· Jay Gibbons

· Juan Gonzalez

· Clay Hensley

· Jerry Hairston

· Felix Heredia, Jr.

· Darren Holmes

· Wally Joyner

· Darryl Kile

· Matt Lawton

· Raul Mondesi

· Mark McGwire

· Guillermo Mota

· Robert Machado

· Damian Moss

· Abraham Nunez

· Trot Nixon

· Jose Offerman

· Andy Pettitte

· Mark Prior

· Neifi Perez

· Rafael Palmiero

· Albert Pujols

· Brian Roberts

· Juan Rincon

· John Rocker

· Pudge Rodriguez

· Sammy Sosa

· Scott Sc hoenweiis

· David Segui

· Alex Sanchez

· Gary Sheffield

· Miguel Tejada

· Julian Tavarez

· Fernando Tatis

· Maurice Vaughn

· Jason Varitek

· Ismael Valdez

· Matt Williams

· Kerry Wood

posted by stupidsexyFlanders (15 comments total)

Mr. Fan, meet Mr. Wheelbarrow-of-Fecal-Matter.
posted by mecran01 at 10:02 AM on December 13, 2007

And by 49, I mean, some number > my willingness to count lines
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 10:04 AM on December 13, 2007

Here's the list as it's currently rumored:

Shouldn't we wait until the report is actually released, and then post the actual list, rather than the rumored one? You couldn't wait five minutes?
posted by dersins at 10:06 AM on December 13, 2007 [1 favorite]

That is correct. I could not wait. Thanks for asking.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 10:07 AM on December 13, 2007

BARRY BONDS? SAY IT AINT SO!!!!11!11!
posted by Mister_A at 10:07 AM on December 13, 2007

Wow, those are some big names. This is certainly shocking news and will presumably have lasting repurcussions for the sport. However, the list is not revealed yet and these are names that are only rumored to be on the list. Let's please get this thread deleted and wait until after the press conference and after the report is released. Though I understand the desire to get your post out there first, this is really an awful post and in about an hour and half, you or someone else will have the ability to make a much better one.
posted by billysumday at 10:07 AM on December 13, 2007

Let me introduce you to my friend the semicolon. He allows you to put a long list all together, in such a way: Brady Anderson; Manny Alexander; Rick Ankiel; Jeff Bagwell; Barry Bonds; Aaron Boone; Rafael Bettancourt ...

And so on.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:10 AM on December 13, 2007 [1 favorite]

That is correct. I could not wait. Thanks for asking.

What, you were afraid someone would come along and scoop your OMG NEWSFILTER post? The Mitchell Report is a big deal. We should have a post about it that, y'know, links to it, or at least some substantive analysis of it, not a post that links to one guy's stats and a 100-word "article" that refers to things it's rumored to contain.
posted by dersins at 10:10 AM on December 13, 2007

This is certainly shocking news and will presumably have lasting repurcussions for the sport.

Only if you've been living in a cave.
posted by justgary at 10:12 AM on December 13, 2007

That is correct. I could not wait. Thanks for asking.

Your rush to post something speculative leads me to wonder whether or not is high time for you to GYOFB.
posted by billysumday at 10:12 AM on December 13, 2007

Flagged as vorzeitig schadenfreude
posted by found missing at 10:12 AM on December 13, 2007

Someone else sent me this same list earlier (where do you guys get this? I think my friend got it from someone who works in the Bronx.) - maybe that lends credibility. I was thinking of putting a post together on this as well, but, hell, laziweb did it for me.

I have a hard time getting worked up over this (unless hated Arod is on the list). Some drugs are OK, some aren't. Is the distinction because some are legal and some aren't? Is something appropriate if you're recovering from an injury, but not otherwise?

The complete and total denial by the Commish is funny, though.
posted by These Premises Are Alarmed at 10:12 AM on December 13, 2007

Hey Drudge, got any more hot rumors for us?
posted by 2sheets at 10:13 AM on December 13, 2007

Is that a new flag, found missing?

Also Juan Rincon is an anagram of "Jan Unicorn".

/end commuunication
posted by Mister_A at 10:14 AM on December 13, 2007

You mean to tell me that all of these guys with forearms the size of tree trunks were using steroids.

Who would've thought it?
posted by dios at 10:16 AM on December 13, 2007 [1 favorite]