13 shot venti soy hazelnut vanilla cinnamon white mocha with extra white mocha and caramel

December 21, 2007 9:37 PM

The Most Expensive Drink at Starbucks.
posted by dhammond (62 comments total)

For the true caffiend!
posted by Steven C. Den Beste at 9:42 PM on December 21, 2007

I was actually surprised it was "only" about $15...
posted by Kadin2048 at 9:44 PM on December 21, 2007

I get depressed every time I buy Starbucks.
posted by Octoparrot at 9:44 PM on December 21, 2007

Here is a shot of the receipt (note: 2 shots come with the drink, so she only rang up 11)

There's actually 3 shots of espresso in a venti. Two in a grande, and one in a tall. He said that there were 13 shots in the drink so he actually got charged an extra shot he never received. HE GOT RIPPED OFF!
posted by MaryDellamorte at 9:46 PM on December 21, 2007 [5 favorites]

As far as I can tell all drinks at starbucks are a ripoff, even when free.
posted by Sam.Burdick at 9:55 PM on December 21, 2007 [2 favorites]

I don't have proof, but I've beat this.

Granted, it's sort of what happens when you come in with a thermos and a giant travel mug and tell them to fill 'em both with straight espresso.

No. All mine. Hands off!
posted by loquacious at 9:56 PM on December 21, 2007

For some reason I was expecting that he'd discover some sort of VIP-level beverage scented with truffles and bald eagle marrow that clocks in around $250.
posted by shakespeherian at 9:57 PM on December 21, 2007 [31 favorites]

Granted, it's sort of what happens when you come in with a thermos and a giant travel mug and tell them to fill 'em both with straight espresso.

Just reading that made me twitch and have feelings of anxiety. If I drank that I would be like the mother at the end of Requiem For a Dream, walking around like a freak.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:01 PM on December 21, 2007 [2 favorites]

I meant to say tweaked out freak.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:01 PM on December 21, 2007 [1 favorite]

coming soon: grande kobe beef latte
posted by cogneuro at 10:06 PM on December 21, 2007 [9 favorites]

So I was having this regular americano at Starbucks with my girlfriend, and my wife walked in.
posted by dhartung at 10:13 PM on December 21, 2007 [12 favorites]

Funny, for xmas gifts at work, I got a Starbucks card and a Tulleys card. Go figure.
posted by IronWolve at 10:17 PM on December 21, 2007

It's sort of an interesting exercise, like if you're really stoned or something, but who would want to drink that (even when high)? Who would even attempt it, except those who don't fear mortality? I'd wager that has the entire caloric intake for a couple days in the form of sugar and fat, not to mention a dangerous amount of caffeine. Don't those carmel (sic) frappuccino dealies have about 800 calories? But I bet if I worked at a Starbuck's as a younger man, I could see my younger self doing something this stupid, and even bragging about it. Of course, I'd also be drunk.
posted by krinklyfig at 10:21 PM on December 21, 2007

Just reading that made me twitch and have feelings of anxiety.

The first time I ever did this, truth be told it was destined to be shared over the better part of an evening. I was helping someone move in to a sort of remote-ish location and I had no idea if they'd have coffee or the ability to make it or get it near by, and the Pacific Northwest drivethrough joint only made espresso drinks. The closest thing to coffee was an Americano.

So I just got espresso, instead. Dense, portable, hot - and it could be diluted with a little milk or hot water for those that found it too strong. Maximum portable caffiene density, you see.

That first time it took the poor guy like 20-30 minutes to pull all the shots on two six-station machines. I asked him how much and he sort of blinked and said "I have no idea, really. How about ten bucks?", which was probably low. I think I tipped him ten or twenty for the good service and attitude in the face of what was apparently an illogical or insane request.
posted by loquacious at 10:25 PM on December 21, 2007 [5 favorites]

would the tai-chi master have paid for that drink?
posted by jeremy b at 10:26 PM on December 21, 2007 [3 favorites]

Loquacious, I wish I could have been there to see the initial look on his face after you made your insane request. You said "the first time I ever did this" which translates to me that you've done it on other occasions as well. What were the other barista's reactions?
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:30 PM on December 21, 2007

I'm disappointed. I was sure Loq was going to say he consumed both giant portions of espresso in order to stay awake for the entirety of Burning Man. Or somesuch. Helping a friend move?

I got Starbucks for the first time in a while the other day, because I had an hour to kill and wanted someplace warm, dry and with facilities available. I got some sort of latte and then marveled at what a big chunk it took out of a 20-dollar bill. And that's with nothing extra. I guess you just can't go much higher than high.
posted by SassHat at 10:41 PM on December 21, 2007

Caffe Artigiano has a cup of coffee for $15 on their regular menu. No fancy toppings, weird shots, or dingly accessories.
posted by Extopalopaketle at 10:55 PM on December 21, 2007

Years ago, I was standing in line at a Starbucks on Capitol Hill here here in Seattle. The woman ahead of me in line was the manager, I gathered, as she spoke to the baristas behind the counter with a chatty but somewhat directive familiarity. She wasn't buying a coffee drink that evening.

I enjoyed overhearing her particular request; "I'll just have a venti ice water"...
posted by Tube at 10:56 PM on December 21, 2007 [3 favorites]

That is a one way ticket to diabetes right there people!
posted by Holy foxy moxie batman! at 10:56 PM on December 21, 2007

The most expensive drink at Starbucks is the Kool-Aid.
posted by pracowity at 11:16 PM on December 21, 2007 [15 favorites]

He broke the chain. Now who's gonna pay for my coffee?
posted by not_on_display at 11:29 PM on December 21, 2007

Since he's probably still awake, maybe he can work on the formatting of his website and add a little bit of a border to the left side.
posted by Dave Faris at 11:34 PM on December 21, 2007 [1 favorite]

"For some reason I was expecting that he'd discover some sort of VIP-level beverage scented with truffles and bald eagle marrow that clocks in around $250."

Don't tell Colbert you said that. He has ears everywhere.
posted by muppetboy at 11:48 PM on December 21, 2007

I want to order this when I'm stuck in a cheer chain.
posted by jayder at 12:14 AM on December 22, 2007

Yeah, seconding Item on the number of shots info. Also adding that an Iced Venti has three shots instead of the regular two. Iced Venti drinks are 24 ounces instead of the 20 ounces of their hot counterparts.

Normally I'd avoid posting this since generally like to avoid discussion pertaining to my place of employment when I'm not there (it cuts down on the suffering).

But, since I just finished my third to last night there it doesn't quite torment my psyche as much as usual.

Feast on my knowledge and suffering, I shall soon be free! *cough* right then. carry on.
posted by Stunt at 12:34 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

Extopalopaketle writes "Caffe Artigiano has a cup of coffee for $15 on their regular menu. No fancy toppings, weird shots, or dingly accessories."

Well, if that's really a photo of one of their lattes, I'm impressed. As for the $15 cup, I can see paying that much if the bean is really expensive and then only if it's worth it quality-wise, but once in a great, great while.
posted by krinklyfig at 12:36 AM on December 22, 2007

jayder writes "stuck in a cheer chain"

Story of my life.
posted by krinklyfig at 12:37 AM on December 22, 2007

Story of my life.

Is that why you escape to Metafilter?

Metafilter: Breaking the cheer chain.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 12:41 AM on December 22, 2007

I once had a guy come into the branch of Starbucks I worked in and order a filter coffee. He protested it wasn't strong enough, so my manager added shots of espresso, one after the other, with him insisting each time it wasn't strong enough.

Eventually she dumped out the (venti) mug and put (I think) 12 shots of straight espresso in a mug. The guy tasted it and proclaimed it to be 'just right'.

Half an hour later he walked out, kind of jack-hammering across the floor the way Wily E. Coyote does when he's trying to stop before going off a cliff.

I think we charged him £6 for the coffee too.
posted by Happy Dave at 2:51 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

I used to drink espresso by the USian mug-full, in my 20s. It was plenty, about 6 shots. Made me feel very fine indeed. Now, I drink filter coffee (currently a Vienna roast) brewed strong, and seldom sleep more than 6 hours. Ah, youth! It is so wasted on the young!
posted by Goofyy at 3:07 AM on December 22, 2007

Hm. He missed the one on the upper east side that adds edible gold sprinkles for $250.

(joking, hopefully)
posted by A dead Quaker at 3:20 AM on December 22, 2007

grande kobe beef latte


not Kosher. make it soy.
posted by matteo at 3:34 AM on December 22, 2007

video of the author 1/2 hour after finishing
posted by pyramid termite at 4:00 AM on December 22, 2007

Whenever the Starbucks at the end of my block starts serving coffee, I'll give it a try, if ever there's a break in the drive-up window line. In the meantime, I turn right, instead of left, and go 5 more storefronts, to Tina's Cafe. Tina doesn't ask me silly questions, or try to stuff my order into her "drinks menu," when I order "regular" coffee, like any civilized person does.

I just get coffee, and the right amount of cream, and the sugar that makes it "regular."

Like any civilized person expects.
posted by paulsc at 4:34 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

As someone in the discussion on-site pointed out, if he had made it soy, it would have cost an extra 50c.

Aside: I used to work at SBC, which is now owned by Starbucks, and they do put three shots into any large espresso beverage. I've pulled up to ten shots for customers who want "as much caffeine as possible." I don't know how they got thirteen shots into a 20oz cup with room for anything else since each shot is 1.5oz and thirteen of them would make for 19.5oz... there's barely any room for syrup at that point, let alone extra syrup!

But yeah, had there been space in the cup for milk, and he had requested soy, it would have cost more.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 4:49 AM on December 22, 2007

So in researching how to use his Free Drink coupon, the guy went to multiple Starbucks and bought drinks?
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:16 AM on December 22, 2007

Mod note: few comments removed - you know where metatalk is
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:12 AM on December 22, 2007

Seems a lot of people here believe there's more caffeine in espresso than in regular coffee. This is not the case.
posted by dabitch at 6:23 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

And while we're doing single link blog posts, here's what the baristas have to say about it.
posted by The Bellman at 6:49 AM on December 22, 2007

I feel out of place at Starbucks. I get my jolts at 7-11.
posted by doctorschlock at 7:06 AM on December 22, 2007

[few comments removed - you know where metatalk is]
posted by jessamyn


It's funny when an admin has to break up a fight over coffee. Try switching to decafe.
posted by nola at 7:06 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

I've been doing fourteen shot espressos for a couple years now...
posted by yeoz at 7:16 AM on December 22, 2007

I also have a few of these 'Oops, your next drink is on us' coupons from Starbucks, but, I would never use any of them to get a ridiculously complicated drink, just because it seems like an incredibly dickish thing to do.
posted by yeoz at 7:44 AM on December 22, 2007

Yeah yeoz that's kind of what I thought too.
posted by nola at 7:50 AM on December 22, 2007

From the post:
And the ultimate yuppified result: A 13 shot venti soy hazelnut vanilla cinnamon white mocha with extra white mocha and caramel. It cost a total of $13.76 (with tax).

He got soy.
posted by jopreacher at 7:54 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

Well, if that's really a photo of one of their lattes, I'm impressed.

It is. They do them all with some kind of latte art on top. And they make wonderful coffee too, if you can bear to ruin the art and drink it. (I try to drink it from the bottom of the rosette, to keep the design as long as possible.) They really do know their stuff.
posted by bink at 8:06 AM on December 22, 2007

The most expensive drink at Starbucks is the Kool-Aid.

posted by pracowity


LOL!
posted by darkstar at 8:09 AM on December 22, 2007

This reminds me of when my friends and I were working at Starbucks. One evening when the managers were gone, they decided to do the "power hour" of expresso. One got to around 25 and finally stopped while the other started puking around 17. It probably helps that the one friend enjoys a good fifth of Crown Royal for fun. I mus say I miss those free drinks. Also, I think they forgot each shot of flavor`s supposed to cost extra. Coulda` got a few extra dollars out of that!
posted by jmd82 at 8:15 AM on December 22, 2007

This one coffee house out in Fort Collins had a drink that was a glass full of Espresso for $10. It was called "Black Death" or something.

Also, Is the "super expensive, 6-words to order coffee, stupid size names" meme the new "single button Mac mouse" strawman? I don't really drink coffee any more, but I can, without fail, walk into any Starbucks in my area and say "Large cup of coffee please" and pay the same < $2 I would pay at McDonalds or any other coffee shop on the planet. The worst I'll get is might say "just plain coffee?" or "would you like room for milk" After a simple confirmation I get my coffee. I'll even get it on video and YouTube it if you guys don't believe me.
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 8:38 AM on December 22, 2007

I will take a dollar coffee from any cafe or gas station in Italy over ANYTHING Starbucks has to offer for the rest of my life, if that's possible.

Italians have a way of making coffee that elevates it to the equivalent of the holy grail. If only I could find a job over there...

Besides, Britney Spears drinks Starbucks and have you SEEN her skin? No thanks.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 8:43 AM on December 22, 2007

I am reminded of the scene in Henry Fool where Henry goes to Simon's house after drinking 8 cups of coffee and then does... something.
posted by the duck by the oboe at 8:47 AM on December 22, 2007

Guy shoulda tried ordering in Denmark -- Ventis there can hit ~ US$10.50 (DKK54) before any extras.
posted by squid patrol at 8:49 AM on December 22, 2007

It's funny when an admin has to break up a fight over coffee.

It's funny when an admin has to break up a cheer 'snark chain.'
posted by ericb at 9:14 AM on December 22, 2007

Italians can now laugh even harder at Starbucks and their customers.
posted by wfc123 at 9:58 AM on December 22, 2007

'One small black coffee, please.'

That's all I say at Starbucks. If I was a snark I would add, "Oh, and don't burn the beans this time, please."
posted by kozad at 10:18 AM on December 22, 2007

Triple-shot grande skim latte, and have a man murder my wife. $25,004.50
posted by facetious at 11:16 AM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

I have to laugh when I order the venti americano with an extra shot and watch my local baristas bemusedly discussing whether that's four or five. Even they don't know how many shots go into a venti drink.
posted by stargell at 1:22 PM on December 22, 2007

I love hearing Starbucks hate. People who hate Starbucks for the horribly tarry coffee they brew are entirely missing the point. Starbucks is about ordering the frou-frou ddrinks, many of which are quite decent. Complaining about the poor plain coffee at Starbucks is like complaining that IHOP doesn't serve a really good steak--it's entirely missing the point and the context of the store.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 3:25 PM on December 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

meh
posted by dangerousdan at 10:14 PM on December 22, 2007

So I take it no one else here has given up caffeine altogether?

Of course, it helps that I never drank coffee to begin with. (Can't stand the taste. I had some of Starbucks' frappucinnos a few times, and they were okay -- but that's because all the extra flavorings drowns out the coffee taste.)
posted by Target Practice at 10:37 AM on December 23, 2007

I almost never drink coffee anymore. But I can't claim to have given up caffeine entirely, because I like hot chocolate every now and then and I'll sometimes have an iced tea when I go out to eat.
posted by darkstar at 2:34 PM on December 23, 2007