I Want To Blow YOU Up!
January 11, 2008 7:30 AM Subscribe
A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila. MTV made a show out of her because, amongst other reasons, she has over 2.5 million friends on myspace and she claims not to discriminate. The cast bios are interesting fucking ridiculous. The latest has her and some dude named Bobby breaking up. Fan sites are abuzz.
What.
posted by notmydesk at 7:35 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by notmydesk at 7:35 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
Fort Lauderdale, Fla. Tomboyish Dani describes herself as being "futch" -- not quite feminine but not quite butch either. She's a firefighter by day and a quiet, shy romantic at night. Could she be the one that sets Tila Tequila's heart...
Man, the word "futch" does not bring to mind images of femininity, even compared to what I'd call 'butch'.
posted by delmoi at 7:37 AM on January 11, 2008
Man, the word "futch" does not bring to mind images of femininity, even compared to what I'd call 'butch'.
posted by delmoi at 7:37 AM on January 11, 2008
Personally, I prefer Tina Tilapia.
posted by brain_drain at 7:39 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by brain_drain at 7:39 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Personally, I prefer tequila.
posted by Pastabagel at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by Pastabagel at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008
So... is this the Asian Paris Hilton? Famous for doing nothing except some pornie stuff once in a while?
posted by 45moore45 at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by 45moore45 at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008
Thank you for bringing this obscure television program to my attention. Also, please tell me more about the "MySpace"; I am very interested in these "websites" that are on the internet.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008 [7 favorites]
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:40 AM on January 11, 2008 [7 favorites]
What's this? MTV played a video? And it wasn't Will Smith?
posted by porn in the woods at 7:42 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by porn in the woods at 7:42 AM on January 11, 2008
Thank you for bringing this obscure television program to my attention. Also, please tell me more about the "MySpace"; I am very interested in these "websites" that are on the internet.
sorry, i'd NEVER frickin' heard of it til my girlfriend mentioned it to me last night. and by 'it', i mean the show, not myspace.
posted by gman at 7:42 AM on January 11, 2008
sorry, i'd NEVER frickin' heard of it til my girlfriend mentioned it to me last night. and by 'it', i mean the show, not myspace.
posted by gman at 7:42 AM on January 11, 2008
She's the top unsigned artist on myspace.
she signed herself. from her myspace page: Record Label - Tila Tequila Records
posted by gman at 7:44 AM on January 11, 2008
she signed herself. from her myspace page: Record Label - Tila Tequila Records
posted by gman at 7:44 AM on January 11, 2008
sorry, i'd NEVER frickin' heard of it til my girlfriend mentioned it to me last night. and by 'it', i mean the show, not myspace.
Dude, wait until you hear about Britney's sister! It will blow your MIND
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:45 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
Dude, wait until you hear about Britney's sister! It will blow your MIND
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:45 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
In the single excerpt I have seen from this show, one of the dough-headed male contenders says "I've never dated an Asian chick, but I like Chinese food". After I stopped laughing, I lost the will to live.
posted by biscotti at 7:45 AM on January 11, 2008 [47 favorites]
posted by biscotti at 7:45 AM on January 11, 2008 [47 favorites]
Large head indeed. She reminds me of some alternate universe kewpie doll.
posted by the dief at 7:46 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by the dief at 7:46 AM on January 11, 2008
We should set Tila Tequila up with Paris Paramus.
posted by hermitosis at 7:48 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by hermitosis at 7:48 AM on January 11, 2008
She's the top unsigned artist on myspace.
I weep for western culture
posted by Mick at 7:49 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
I weep for western culture
posted by Mick at 7:49 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
Is this something you need to be a fucking idiot to give a shit about?
posted by chillmost at 7:54 AM on January 11, 2008 [29 favorites]
posted by chillmost at 7:54 AM on January 11, 2008 [29 favorites]
Is this something you need to be a fucking idiot to give a shit about?
Yes.
posted by prostyle at 7:55 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
Yes.
posted by prostyle at 7:55 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
I remember when the "M" in MTV stood for "music". I also remember when MTV2 had only music (and no commercials). Now there is MTVtres which has mostly music but only Reggaton, Latin y Hip Hop. Not that there's anything wrong with a little Don Omar and Belenova, but a little more variety would be nice.
Ms. Tequila's love life is really uninteresting to me. Her faux bi-ness was contrived because it makes interesting tee-vee. However, I'm probably not in the "target demo" for this crap. MTV probably feels like geezers like me should just stick to VH1 Classics and stop complaining. But geezers need excitement.
I just realized MTV's target demo was not alive -- or tiny tots watching Barney -- back when MTV played videos most of the time. Damn kids need to get off my lawn.
posted by birdherder at 7:56 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
Ms. Tequila's love life is really uninteresting to me. Her faux bi-ness was contrived because it makes interesting tee-vee. However, I'm probably not in the "target demo" for this crap. MTV probably feels like geezers like me should just stick to VH1 Classics and stop complaining. But geezers need excitement.
I just realized MTV's target demo was not alive -- or tiny tots watching Barney -- back when MTV played videos most of the time. Damn kids need to get off my lawn.
posted by birdherder at 7:56 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
Is this something you need to be a fucking idiot to give a shit about?
depends why one gives a shit about it. for the most part, yes.
posted by gman at 7:57 AM on January 11, 2008
depends why one gives a shit about it. for the most part, yes.
posted by gman at 7:57 AM on January 11, 2008
On the other hand, with 2.5 million friends and all, I can see why she has "too much going on".
posted by chillmost at 7:59 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by chillmost at 7:59 AM on January 11, 2008
Just hearing about things like this makes me want to jump out of a very high window.
posted by SpacemanStix at 8:09 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by SpacemanStix at 8:09 AM on January 11, 2008
She's the top unsigned artist on myspace.
posted by smackfu
And she has been for a few years now, which leads me to believe that she remains unsigned in a rare show of sense from the music business.
posted by micayetoca at 8:10 AM on January 11, 2008 [7 favorites]
posted by smackfu
And she has been for a few years now, which leads me to believe that she remains unsigned in a rare show of sense from the music business.
posted by micayetoca at 8:10 AM on January 11, 2008 [7 favorites]
Alien or android?
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 8:16 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 8:16 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
You never hear people blaming the end of "M"TV for the decline in music sales. Yet the evidence is there right in front of us -- TMZ got its own TV show due to the marketability of celebrity.
posted by VulcanMike at 8:16 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by VulcanMike at 8:16 AM on January 11, 2008
Alien or android?
Do you really think aliens have MySpace accounts? Facebook, maybe.
posted by poppo at 8:20 AM on January 11, 2008
Do you really think aliens have MySpace accounts? Facebook, maybe.
posted by poppo at 8:20 AM on January 11, 2008
That show is on all the time at my gym, which has TV's you have to use a radio to get the sound. So I have no clue what this show is about.
I pieced together it was about guys competing to get into the sack with a girl with fetal alcohol syndrome. The name of the show and her stage name Tequila I thought were just tasteless jokes. I see I wasn't far from the truth.
posted by munchingzombie at 8:24 AM on January 11, 2008 [4 favorites]
I pieced together it was about guys competing to get into the sack with a girl with fetal alcohol syndrome. The name of the show and her stage name Tequila I thought were just tasteless jokes. I see I wasn't far from the truth.
posted by munchingzombie at 8:24 AM on January 11, 2008 [4 favorites]
I pieced together it was about guys competing to get into the sack with a girl with fetal alcohol syndrome. The name of the show and her stage name Tequila I thought were just tasteless jokes. I see I wasn't far from the truth.
guys and girls apparently.
posted by gman at 8:26 AM on January 11, 2008
guys and girls apparently.
posted by gman at 8:26 AM on January 11, 2008
Like most "reality" shows, this is largely scripted. Not worth getting depressed over.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:27 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:27 AM on January 11, 2008
And that guy with the fedora? What a douchebag!
And how come that one other guy gets a color picture and all the rest are b&w?
posted by BeerFilter at 8:27 AM on January 11, 2008
And how come that one other guy gets a color picture and all the rest are b&w?
posted by BeerFilter at 8:27 AM on January 11, 2008
And how come that one other guy gets a color picture and all the rest are b&w?
He was theloser winner. So he gets the color treatment. That's what reality shows do when contestants get knocked off...they greyscale their bio photos. It's heartless, really.
posted by iconomy at 8:30 AM on January 11, 2008
He was the
posted by iconomy at 8:30 AM on January 11, 2008
I remember when the "M" in MTV stood for "music". I also remember when MTV2 had only music (and no commercials).
Let's be honest here; MTV is a business and they probably focus group every moment of programming. They almost certainly discovered that people didn't care about music videos and that they preferred vapid reality shows. The people have spoken, and what they said is "more reality shows."
Of course, would you really want to watch MTV for two hours in the hopes of seeing one video you like when you could pop on to YouTube and find it in 10 seconds? The "music channel" is a dinosaur in the face of on-demand video.
posted by aubin at 8:36 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
Let's be honest here; MTV is a business and they probably focus group every moment of programming. They almost certainly discovered that people didn't care about music videos and that they preferred vapid reality shows. The people have spoken, and what they said is "more reality shows."
Of course, would you really want to watch MTV for two hours in the hopes of seeing one video you like when you could pop on to YouTube and find it in 10 seconds? The "music channel" is a dinosaur in the face of on-demand video.
posted by aubin at 8:36 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
The loser indeed. I guess I really have nothing to do at all, so I found this article someone posted in the comments at AV Club a while ago, which cracked me up:
NEW YORK (AP) -- "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" is apparently over for Bobby Banhart.
The 25-year-old male film student selected last month by Tequila on her popular MTV reality dating show is no longer -- or maybe never was -- dating the 26-year-old bisexual Internet celebrity.
During MTV's live New Year's Eve programming, Tequila said that Banhart had broken up with her because of her hectic work schedule. "He couldn't handle it," she said. "He broke up with me."
However, Banhart said in a December 30 message posted on MySpace that "she never called me after the last show and no one would give me her number."
posted by kittens for breakfast at 8:37 AM on January 11, 2008
NEW YORK (AP) -- "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" is apparently over for Bobby Banhart.
The 25-year-old male film student selected last month by Tequila on her popular MTV reality dating show is no longer -- or maybe never was -- dating the 26-year-old bisexual Internet celebrity.
During MTV's live New Year's Eve programming, Tequila said that Banhart had broken up with her because of her hectic work schedule. "He couldn't handle it," she said. "He broke up with me."
However, Banhart said in a December 30 message posted on MySpace that "she never called me after the last show and no one would give me her number."
posted by kittens for breakfast at 8:37 AM on January 11, 2008
When I say "Thank you for posting this", I am not being sarcastic.
Thank you for posting this.
I did not know that this person existed or what her current situation is. Apparently she is a popular public figure though and now I know some things about her.
This will probably come up in some random conversation or, better yet, trivia night sometime. This will give me material to participate with and look "well traveled". Posts like this make me feel like I now know something I shouldn't, and random knowledge like this is often useful.
posted by Hicksu at 8:41 AM on January 11, 2008 [4 favorites]
Thank you for posting this.
I did not know that this person existed or what her current situation is. Apparently she is a popular public figure though and now I know some things about her.
This will probably come up in some random conversation or, better yet, trivia night sometime. This will give me material to participate with and look "well traveled". Posts like this make me feel like I now know something I shouldn't, and random knowledge like this is often useful.
posted by Hicksu at 8:41 AM on January 11, 2008 [4 favorites]
Dani was great. The show was amusing. It has been over for a few weeks. Why are we discussing it now?
posted by k8t at 8:45 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by k8t at 8:45 AM on January 11, 2008
I've watched a couple times, you know, to keep up with the youth. Tequila's a total narcissist.
posted by klangklangston at 8:46 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by klangklangston at 8:46 AM on January 11, 2008
She looks like an alien on that Wikipedia photo... you know, the shape of her head, the disproportionately large eyes and all that.
posted by clevershark at 8:58 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by clevershark at 8:58 AM on January 11, 2008
MetaFilter: Illuminating dark corners of the Internet and obscure cable channels for the rest of us.
posted by m0nm0n at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by m0nm0n at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Since when has "number of Myspace friends" been any sort of real-world metric anyway? I created a Myspace account so I could see something that someone on another forum linked to that was hosted by Myspace. I didn't even update my home page in any way (didn't look at it, really) but soon after I received a bunch of friend invites.
Clearly those things are overrated...
posted by clevershark at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008
Clearly those things are overrated...
posted by clevershark at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008
It was three in the morning, and I was flipping through the channels. After perusing the usual suspects, I landed on MTV. There I saw a charmless and irritating young woman, bedecked in the trappings of the insecure, arguing with some similarly vapid and unattractive young people about something-or-other. Then she proceeded to go on a "date" with a horse-faced blonde, which involved some making-out type activities. Bored and vaguely nauseous, my mind drifted back to when I was twelve years old, sitting alone in the TV room of my grandmother's house (she had cable!) At three in the morning, twelve year old me saw Renaldo and the Loaf's video for "Songs for Swingin' Larvae. It scared the shit out of me and amazed me. That's when I realized a single tear was falling down my cheek, and that three in the morning, my beloved three in the morning, had been stolen by assholes.
posted by louche mustachio at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008 [22 favorites]
posted by louche mustachio at 9:01 AM on January 11, 2008 [22 favorites]
I only found out about this show from watching The Soup (that show helps me by recapping & mocking the stupid "reality" shows I don't have the time, inclination or stomach to watch), and having a friend of mine comment about how TT is more of a bobble-head than Giada DiLaurentis. But we were still wondering what her (TT's) "claim to fame" is. And I still don't know. Is she just a MySpace whore?
At least Paris is a "celebutant".
posted by ObscureReferenceMan at 9:04 AM on January 11, 2008
At least Paris is a "celebutant".
posted by ObscureReferenceMan at 9:04 AM on January 11, 2008
Tila Tequila, showing the world that Asian Americans can be cheesy and phoney just like the next guy. You go girl!
posted by cazoo at 9:08 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by cazoo at 9:08 AM on January 11, 2008
Is she just a MySpace whore?
Well, she was just a MySpace whore. Now she's more of a general whore.
posted by m0nm0n at 9:11 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Well, she was just a MySpace whore. Now she's more of a general whore.
posted by m0nm0n at 9:11 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
She's icky.
posted by malaprohibita at 9:27 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by malaprohibita at 9:27 AM on January 11, 2008
A sign of the End Times, surely.
Is stupid a virus you can catch from TV. when parents used to complain about TV fucking up their kids I used to laugh. But you watch five minutes of "TT" or "I Love New York" you have become perceptibly less intelligent.
It's not the vapid sexuality on copious display. Hell. I'd let my kids watch porn rather than this kind of crap. No. It's the sheer levels of dishonesty, from the mockery of what qualifies as a worthy human relationship and real emotion to imbecilic repetition of the editing to pad the "story" - showing what they showed then showing you what they showed you and the previewing what they are gonna show you. And, once discovered by archaeologists of the future, everybody wears a bikini 24/7 in the 21st century - snow or shine.
posted by tkchrist at 9:27 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Is stupid a virus you can catch from TV. when parents used to complain about TV fucking up their kids I used to laugh. But you watch five minutes of "TT" or "I Love New York" you have become perceptibly less intelligent.
It's not the vapid sexuality on copious display. Hell. I'd let my kids watch porn rather than this kind of crap. No. It's the sheer levels of dishonesty, from the mockery of what qualifies as a worthy human relationship and real emotion to imbecilic repetition of the editing to pad the "story" - showing what they showed then showing you what they showed you and the previewing what they are gonna show you. And, once discovered by archaeologists of the future, everybody wears a bikini 24/7 in the 21st century - snow or shine.
posted by tkchrist at 9:27 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Is stupid a virus you can catch from TV.
If there's any virus you can catch from TV, you will catch it from this show.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:33 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
If there's any virus you can catch from TV, you will catch it from this show.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:33 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
birdherder: I remember when the "M" in MTV stood for "music".
I can remember when pointing out what the "M" in "MTV" stood for was a witty and revolutionary way of pointing out how it'd gone bad, rather than a way of showing how ancient you are.
We're old men, my friend. I've been listening to people say "you, the 'm' in 'mtv' USED to mean..." for a good fifteen years now.
posted by koeselitz at 9:34 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
I can remember when pointing out what the "M" in "MTV" stood for was a witty and revolutionary way of pointing out how it'd gone bad, rather than a way of showing how ancient you are.
We're old men, my friend. I've been listening to people say "you, the 'm' in 'mtv' USED to mean..." for a good fifteen years now.
posted by koeselitz at 9:34 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
Can you imagine if the world was really exactly like it is portrayed on these MTV type shows, the sweet sixteen one, this hot mess, watch Flavor Flav try to Kill Chuck D with Shame and so on, tkchrist?
I keep six hollow teeth filled with cyanide and a frag grenade duct taped to my head at all times against the eventuality that the blind watchmaker returns and magics me away into that world. The fucking horror...
posted by Divine_Wino at 9:35 AM on January 11, 2008 [5 favorites]
I keep six hollow teeth filled with cyanide and a frag grenade duct taped to my head at all times against the eventuality that the blind watchmaker returns and magics me away into that world. The fucking horror...
posted by Divine_Wino at 9:35 AM on January 11, 2008 [5 favorites]
The fact that she has her own show demonstrates that MTV doesn't understand MySpace. No, Tila Tequila does not have 2.5 million friends on MySpace. There is only one actual users on MySpace, a lonely 13-year-old named Wallace who lives in Sheboygan, WI. Every other profile is an artifice created by strippers to sell pornography to teenagers, all befriending each other. It works because Wallace is flattered to have so many pretty women who want to be his friend, and because he is heir to a processed cheese fortune, and so has millions and millions of dollars to spend on porn.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:37 AM on January 11, 2008 [12 favorites]
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:37 AM on January 11, 2008 [12 favorites]
geezers need excitement! tina tequila is not excitement.
posted by mrgrimm at 9:39 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by mrgrimm at 9:39 AM on January 11, 2008
A general note: it's hardest to avoid being sexist when presented with an ignoble person that seems to fall into a multitude of stereotypes. But, though it's difficult to keep from categorizing on that basis, it's still the right thing to do.
posted by koeselitz at 9:46 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by koeselitz at 9:46 AM on January 11, 2008
I love that even though it is apparently not possible to find love with Tila Tequila through her show, she's getting another season.
I totally got sucked into this show. Dani was my favorite.
posted by naoko at 9:47 AM on January 11, 2008
I totally got sucked into this show. Dani was my favorite.
posted by naoko at 9:47 AM on January 11, 2008
Shit like this reminds me why I love Tivo. I say hey, Tivo, record me Jeopardy so I don't miss it. And Good Eats, and maybe some of that America's Test Kitchen thing with the guy in the bowtie being all prissy. And Tivo says, hey man, welcome home, I thought you might also want to watch the pilot of Monk and an episode of Star Trek with a heavy-handed allegory about Cold War politics. And I'm like, thanks Tivo, you're the best; there sure is great stuff on TV.
And then I come here and read that not only do they broadcast shows like this, but there are fansites for them. So basically, what I'm saying is, thanks, MeFi, for ruining television for me.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:52 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
And then I come here and read that not only do they broadcast shows like this, but there are fansites for them. So basically, what I'm saying is, thanks, MeFi, for ruining television for me.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:52 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that I do not find this Tila person attractive, nor do I like her TV show.
posted by oncogenesis at 9:56 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by oncogenesis at 9:56 AM on January 11, 2008
Seriously, she's fugly.
posted by oncogenesis at 9:56 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by oncogenesis at 9:56 AM on January 11, 2008
Hey, an Asian American with her own show! Progress! The days of Suzy Wong are far behind us, now! I'm sure Sandra Oh, Margaret Cho and, B.D. Wong are proud to have cleared the path to this zenith of anti-orientalist representation.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:05 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:05 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
If you're gonna have scripted romance, grab the recent DVD release of "Love, American Style".
Yeah, I am that old.
And yeah, you kids get off my yard.
posted by willmize at 10:06 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Yeah, I am that old.
And yeah, you kids get off my yard.
posted by willmize at 10:06 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
She looked hotter to me when I thought she was bi.
posted by wfc123 at 10:18 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by wfc123 at 10:18 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
It's hip to say this girl is ugly and Sandra Oh is beautiful.
posted by wfc123 at 10:20 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
she's getting another season.
This seems to be the norm for these type of shows.
Fake bisexuals fucking piss me off.
I don't know, I've watched the show, here and there, and she's doesn't seem to mind getting close with any of the people on the show.
Also at this point it really doesn't matter to me. As I'm sure everyone here knows the 'Reality" in Reality Television is a misnomer to the say the least.
So who cares, enjoy it as a really badly acted sitcom.
posted by P.o.B. at 10:20 AM on January 11, 2008
This seems to be the norm for these type of shows.
Fake bisexuals fucking piss me off.
I don't know, I've watched the show, here and there, and she's doesn't seem to mind getting close with any of the people on the show.
Also at this point it really doesn't matter to me. As I'm sure everyone here knows the 'Reality" in Reality Television is a misnomer to the say the least.
So who cares, enjoy it as a really badly acted sitcom.
posted by P.o.B. at 10:20 AM on January 11, 2008
"I don't know, I've watched the show, here and there, and she's doesn't seem to mind getting close with any of the people on the show."
Well, yes. As I mentioned briefly above, she's a narcissist. She's only able to relate to other people through their desiring of her, and her "bisexuality" is constructed around that point. She can be charming, or at least can charm people on her show, by allowing them to focus as intently on her as she herself does. And that's also why it's not much of a surprise that her "relationship" didn't last.
posted by klangklangston at 10:26 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
Well, yes. As I mentioned briefly above, she's a narcissist. She's only able to relate to other people through their desiring of her, and her "bisexuality" is constructed around that point. She can be charming, or at least can charm people on her show, by allowing them to focus as intently on her as she herself does. And that's also why it's not much of a surprise that her "relationship" didn't last.
posted by klangklangston at 10:26 AM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
The cast bios are interesting fucking ridiculous.
Well-placed fucking.
posted by Moistener at 10:30 AM on January 11, 2008
Well-placed fucking.
posted by Moistener at 10:30 AM on January 11, 2008
Wow, pin-up girl gets a TV show on a network watched by no one. Who knew there was a place for attractive girls on television?
the cast bios are fucking ridiculous
The cast bios are written for mental defectives:
She's just about ready to come out of the closet and wants her first time to be adventurous and special. And she thinks Tila Tequila might be the one...
She's "just about" ready to come out of the closet? She's trying to date another girl on television, she's out, assuming she isn't an actress and the whole identity isn't made up. Or is MTV trying to redefine "coming out of the closet" to mean "making out with another chick on television".
Thank you for giving me something to focus on during my Two Minutes Hate.
posted by Pastabagel at 10:39 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
the cast bios are fucking ridiculous
The cast bios are written for mental defectives:
She's just about ready to come out of the closet and wants her first time to be adventurous and special. And she thinks Tila Tequila might be the one...
She's "just about" ready to come out of the closet? She's trying to date another girl on television, she's out, assuming she isn't an actress and the whole identity isn't made up. Or is MTV trying to redefine "coming out of the closet" to mean "making out with another chick on television".
Thank you for giving me something to focus on during my Two Minutes Hate.
posted by Pastabagel at 10:39 AM on January 11, 2008 [2 favorites]
Has anyone noticed that Bravo has stopped referring to their shows as reality shows and now calls them "Competitive Something Something shows?"
posted by drezdn at 10:41 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by drezdn at 10:41 AM on January 11, 2008
Aha, thank you for explaining to me why I saw this person's name on several reuters photographs on 12/31/2007. I thought I had missed some cultural shift where a VJ became a commodity, now I see it may have been the other way around.
posted by cavalier at 10:45 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by cavalier at 10:45 AM on January 11, 2008
she's a narcissist. She's only able to relate to other people through their desiring of her, and her "bisexuality" is constructed around that point.
that's fantastic. you've given me a new way to look at narcissists.
posted by malaprohibita at 10:47 AM on January 11, 2008
that's fantastic. you've given me a new way to look at narcissists.
posted by malaprohibita at 10:47 AM on January 11, 2008
Dating shows are both evolving and devolving. By 2010 I expect we will have "Date Me I'm Married" (the polygamist edition of The Bachelor) or "Blind Date (now WITH ANIMALS!)."
posted by onlyconnect at 10:59 AM on January 11, 2008
posted by onlyconnect at 10:59 AM on January 11, 2008
aubin writes "Let's be honest here; MTV is a business and they probably focus group every moment of programming. They almost certainly discovered that people didn't care about music videos and that they preferred vapid reality shows. The people have spoken, and what they said is 'more reality shows.' "
But cable was supposed to offer people channels of content that they couldn't find on the big channels, which only programmed for large audiences. The idea is that smaller audiences can find their own favorite channels that don't have to cater to the biggest market. If all cable channels cater to the biggest market, then we're left with no niche markets, no specialty programming, nothing but what Joe Sixpack wants to see, all the time. Nascar and Oprah, reality tv, cable talk news, 24 hours. And that's not worth paying for.
posted by krinklyfig at 11:02 AM on January 11, 2008
But cable was supposed to offer people channels of content that they couldn't find on the big channels, which only programmed for large audiences. The idea is that smaller audiences can find their own favorite channels that don't have to cater to the biggest market. If all cable channels cater to the biggest market, then we're left with no niche markets, no specialty programming, nothing but what Joe Sixpack wants to see, all the time. Nascar and Oprah, reality tv, cable talk news, 24 hours. And that's not worth paying for.
posted by krinklyfig at 11:02 AM on January 11, 2008
I don't know, I've watched the show, here and there, and she's doesn't seem to mind getting close with any of the people on the show.
Don't want to do the googling from work, but I remember reading some sort of interview that suggests that she's not really bi. Not to derail into sexual politics, but girls who make out with girls because gets the boys all hot is not exactly my idea of a queer role model.
posted by desuetude at 11:30 AM on January 11, 2008
Don't want to do the googling from work, but I remember reading some sort of interview that suggests that she's not really bi. Not to derail into sexual politics, but girls who make out with girls because gets the boys all hot is not exactly my idea of a queer role model.
posted by desuetude at 11:30 AM on January 11, 2008
i>Don't want to do the googling from work, but I remember reading some sort of interview that suggests that she's not really bi. Not to derail into sexual politics, but girls who make out with girls because gets the boys all hot is not exactly my idea of a queer role model.
4th link in my post - 'claims'
posted by gman at 11:36 AM on January 11, 2008
4th link in my post - 'claims'
posted by gman at 11:36 AM on January 11, 2008
And that's also why it's not much of a surprise that her "relationship" didn't last.
I agree with you except as I mentioned above, I disbelieve the whole premise of the show. Like every other dating show on MTV or VH1, it was probably scheduled to run for two seasons. With that in mind it becomes obviously predictable that the "relationship" won't work(at least not after the first season), not for her, "New-York", Flavor Flav, Hart, or any other psuedo-celeb that manages to get one of these types of shows on the air. Just as I did not expect the people to get of the island on 'Lost', nor will they ever truly break out of prison on 'Prison Break'. And actually I'm not interested in seeing those things, just as I am not interested so much in seeing who she picks as to what happens along the way. Ridiculous competitions, endless bickering, and one or two fist fights...good times. By the way, I would wager 2 to 1 it's going to be a woman she chooses at the end next year.
posted by P.o.B. at 11:39 AM on January 11, 2008
I agree with you except as I mentioned above, I disbelieve the whole premise of the show. Like every other dating show on MTV or VH1, it was probably scheduled to run for two seasons. With that in mind it becomes obviously predictable that the "relationship" won't work(at least not after the first season), not for her, "New-York", Flavor Flav, Hart, or any other psuedo-celeb that manages to get one of these types of shows on the air. Just as I did not expect the people to get of the island on 'Lost', nor will they ever truly break out of prison on 'Prison Break'. And actually I'm not interested in seeing those things, just as I am not interested so much in seeing who she picks as to what happens along the way. Ridiculous competitions, endless bickering, and one or two fist fights...good times. By the way, I would wager 2 to 1 it's going to be a woman she chooses at the end next year.
posted by P.o.B. at 11:39 AM on January 11, 2008
Let's be honest here; MTV is a business and they probably focus group every moment of programming. They almost certainly discovered that people didn't care about music videos and that they preferred vapid reality shows. The people have spoken, and what they said is 'more reality shows.
I always guessed it had a lot to do with viewer retention through maximum ads. No matter how well they're curated into themes programs, a given viewer may lose interest in the next music video to come on, depending on taste. AShlee Simpson AGAIN? *Click over to VH1.* Viewers do tend to watch the entirety of short format shows enriched with that opiate of the masses, narrative, and, tivo notwithstanding, see more ads that way. TRL and other countdown video shows show how effective devising a narrative of competition, especially interactive competition, can be to make music videos more commercially viable.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:43 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
I always guessed it had a lot to do with viewer retention through maximum ads. No matter how well they're curated into themes programs, a given viewer may lose interest in the next music video to come on, depending on taste. AShlee Simpson AGAIN? *Click over to VH1.* Viewers do tend to watch the entirety of short format shows enriched with that opiate of the masses, narrative, and, tivo notwithstanding, see more ads that way. TRL and other countdown video shows show how effective devising a narrative of competition, especially interactive competition, can be to make music videos more commercially viable.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:43 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Oh, yeah, that's been a longstanding and open policy at MTV; I remember learning about it in my music biz internship thing. The reason videos are out is that videos give viewers an opportunity to split every three minutes or so, making it hard to retain them. Though as we see further fractioning in the market and tighter granularity on demographics and viewership stats, we could see a return to shorts, especially if they don't follow the regular 30-minute blocks. Ideally, these would be music videos that have corporate sponsors, making them irreducible from commercials. Fallout Boy uses Pepsi to fight zombies sort of stuff. Then, yeah, tie 'em all together in a competition-style narrative and run 'em with smaller breaks for traditional advertising.
posted by klangklangston at 12:02 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by klangklangston at 12:02 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
Little do they know, Pepsi is the best thing around to wash down the brains. BWAHAHAHA!!
posted by InfidelZombie at 12:11 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by InfidelZombie at 12:11 PM on January 11, 2008
Excuse me, is this the line-up for dropping random quotes from Idiocracy?
posted by spoobnooble at 12:15 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by spoobnooble at 12:15 PM on January 11, 2008
Fuck this shit. That is all.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:25 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:25 PM on January 11, 2008
porn in the woods: What's this? MTV played a video? And it wasn't Will Smith?
birdherder: I remember when the "M" in MTV stood for "music".
Perhaps next you two will regale us with your commentary on the poor quality of airline food.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 12:56 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
birdherder: I remember when the "M" in MTV stood for "music".
Perhaps next you two will regale us with your commentary on the poor quality of airline food.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 12:56 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
she's a narcissist. She's only able to relate to other people through their desiring of her, and her "bisexuality" is constructed around that point.
Next season: A Shot at Health with Karen Horney!
I've watched parts of maybe a half dozen episodes of ASAL. It's so hilariously awful that it's practically a parody of the "reality show" format. And yes, if you haven't seen it, Tila Tequila really is a waterhead.
posted by octobersurprise at 1:08 PM on January 11, 2008
Next season: A Shot at Health with Karen Horney!
I've watched parts of maybe a half dozen episodes of ASAL. It's so hilariously awful that it's practically a parody of the "reality show" format. And yes, if you haven't seen it, Tila Tequila really is a waterhead.
posted by octobersurprise at 1:08 PM on January 11, 2008
What is airline food?
posted by birdherder at 1:10 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by birdherder at 1:10 PM on January 11, 2008
birdherder writes "What is airline food?"
Nobody knows.
posted by Bugbread at 1:16 PM on January 11, 2008
Nobody knows.
posted by Bugbread at 1:16 PM on January 11, 2008
Astro Zombie writes: Every other profile is an artifice created by strippers to sell pornography to teenagers
The guy in the office next to me just called to ask why I was laughing so hard. I did not tell him the truth.
posted by kosem at 1:19 PM on January 11, 2008
The guy in the office next to me just called to ask why I was laughing so hard. I did not tell him the truth.
posted by kosem at 1:19 PM on January 11, 2008
What is airline food?
Nobody knows.
Oh sure, we know what airline food is, we just don't know what it's deal is. I mean really, what is the deal with airline food anyway?
posted by NoMich at 1:25 PM on January 11, 2008
Nobody knows.
Oh sure, we know what airline food is, we just don't know what it's deal is. I mean really, what is the deal with airline food anyway?
posted by NoMich at 1:25 PM on January 11, 2008
I saw a commercial the other day, for what "reality" show I forget, but their tagline, in an attempt to emphasize that the show wasn't scripted was:
This isn't just Reality.... it's ACTUALITY.
Pretty soon they'll have to start calling them For Reals, No Seriously Really Actually For Reals Literally, I Mean It, Not Even Kidding Shows.
posted by Durhey at 1:26 PM on January 11, 2008
This isn't just Reality.... it's ACTUALITY.
Pretty soon they'll have to start calling them For Reals, No Seriously Really Actually For Reals Literally, I Mean It, Not Even Kidding Shows.
posted by Durhey at 1:26 PM on January 11, 2008
Was it for the Fox Reality Channel? [caution website makes noise].
posted by birdherder at 1:41 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by birdherder at 1:41 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
You're thinking of CourtTV, Durhey. And to emphasis their point, they changed their name to "truTV".
posted by puke & cry at 2:16 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by puke & cry at 2:16 PM on January 11, 2008
I was pretty down on this show, but I got sucked in towards the end when I realized Dani--one of the two butchy/androgynous women (or "futch" as she calls herself) out of the whole passel 'o' lesbians was actually hanging in there. It boggled my mind that a show obviously geared towards throwing up as much hot women making out with each other on screen as possible might end up with a "traditional" femme-butch pairing. I mean, that never happens. That only recently happened on the L-Word, a show that is ostensibly supposed to be about lesbians despite having very few women on it who bear any resemblance to most lesbians I've met.
So Dani's presence drew me in. It was so not MTV to have a girl on there who the general public might not find "hawt". Would viewers actually want to watch the bachelorette make out with her? This was actually acceptable to producers? It was liberating, in a way. Under all the vapid, stupid, sexual immaturity, there was reality on a reality television show. It helped a lot that out of any contestant who has been on any reality show ever, Dani is probably the only person I'd like to meet. If you watch episodes, she doesn't participate in the screaming backstabbing idiotic bitch-fights that every other contestant on every other reality show participates in. It could very well just be the editing, but she comes off as just a really cool, neat person to hang out with.
. . . God, I just wrote two paragraphs on that stupid show. This is embarrassing.
posted by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on January 11, 2008
So Dani's presence drew me in. It was so not MTV to have a girl on there who the general public might not find "hawt". Would viewers actually want to watch the bachelorette make out with her? This was actually acceptable to producers? It was liberating, in a way. Under all the vapid, stupid, sexual immaturity, there was reality on a reality television show. It helped a lot that out of any contestant who has been on any reality show ever, Dani is probably the only person I'd like to meet. If you watch episodes, she doesn't participate in the screaming backstabbing idiotic bitch-fights that every other contestant on every other reality show participates in. It could very well just be the editing, but she comes off as just a really cool, neat person to hang out with.
. . . God, I just wrote two paragraphs on that stupid show. This is embarrassing.
posted by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on January 11, 2008
I think this (a rerun? promo?) might have been on at the gym while I was using the treadmill. I couldn't quite figure out what the hell was going on. It looked like a mix of Big Brother and softcore porn, starring a variety of not-particularly-good-looking people and this one weird-looking bleached Asian girl. It's probably a good thing the audio was off.
I'd like to hope this only describes one show on MTV, but part of me is worried...
posted by Kadin2048 at 2:30 PM on January 11, 2008
I'd like to hope this only describes one show on MTV, but part of me is worried...
posted by Kadin2048 at 2:30 PM on January 11, 2008
Heh, 90 comments, mostly from people who've never even seen the show, all pontificacting.
My girlfiend sucked me into this show, by constantly watching it while i was surfing the net. What I must say is, Tila is _very_ empathic -- she really gets you feeling for and believing what she's saying is real. There were 5 or 6 episodes that were really, really good. I actually didn't think it was all completely fake, and thought her and bobby might last for a while.
The reason their is a second season is because the show very well, I think it was one of the highest rated shows for MTV in several years. I doubt it was pre-planned.
Anyway, dumping Bobby after two weeks is lame, and just removes any possibility that the show was at all authentic. I don't think the bi-sexual gimmick is enough to get it ratings -- at least at my house, we sort of really believed Tequila was being honest.
Don't plan on bothering with season 2 now.
For people who think I'm being naive, watch a couple episodes (start from when they are down to 16 characters) -- she is a natural at being empathic and coming off as honest.
posted by nads at 2:40 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
My girlfiend sucked me into this show, by constantly watching it while i was surfing the net. What I must say is, Tila is _very_ empathic -- she really gets you feeling for and believing what she's saying is real. There were 5 or 6 episodes that were really, really good. I actually didn't think it was all completely fake, and thought her and bobby might last for a while.
The reason their is a second season is because the show very well, I think it was one of the highest rated shows for MTV in several years. I doubt it was pre-planned.
Anyway, dumping Bobby after two weeks is lame, and just removes any possibility that the show was at all authentic. I don't think the bi-sexual gimmick is enough to get it ratings -- at least at my house, we sort of really believed Tequila was being honest.
Don't plan on bothering with season 2 now.
For people who think I'm being naive, watch a couple episodes (start from when they are down to 16 characters) -- she is a natural at being empathic and coming off as honest.
posted by nads at 2:40 PM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]
She's dating her manager, a much older guy. Has been for a long time. The whole TV show was fake (I'm sure this is shocking news). They had to do a pretend-breakup with Bobby in order to set up Season Two, since this is indeed now MTV's highest rated program.
The little Italian fedora fellow is getting his own dating show too.
And yeah, I also thought Dani was awesome. The firefighter guys she worked with really seemed to love her.
posted by First Post at 2:52 PM on January 11, 2008
The little Italian fedora fellow is getting his own dating show too.
And yeah, I also thought Dani was awesome. The firefighter guys she worked with really seemed to love her.
posted by First Post at 2:52 PM on January 11, 2008
Dani was awesome. Should have won, if T was really bi. I know a few men Dani has turned bi. If it didn't work on TT she's broken.
posted by Toekneesan at 3:11 PM on January 11, 2008
posted by Toekneesan at 3:11 PM on January 11, 2008
I know a few men Dani has turned bi.
Did you mean... women? Sounds strange to me that a female could (by being appealing) cause heterosexual men to want to fuck other men. But maybe I'm missing something.
posted by marble at 4:40 PM on January 11, 2008
Did you mean... women? Sounds strange to me that a female could (by being appealing) cause heterosexual men to want to fuck other men. But maybe I'm missing something.
posted by marble at 4:40 PM on January 11, 2008
Did someone give ThePinkSuperhero the day off?
I keed. But I liked the lesbian firefighter chick. Yes, I watched the show once and I am dumber for it. But if thinking the lesbian firefight chick is hot is wrong, I don't wanna be right.
posted by bardic at 4:40 PM on January 11, 2008
I keed. But I liked the lesbian firefighter chick. Yes, I watched the show once and I am dumber for it. But if thinking the lesbian firefight chick is hot is wrong, I don't wanna be right.
posted by bardic at 4:40 PM on January 11, 2008
she is a natural at being empathic and coming off as honest.
Stop thinking with your 'nads, nads.
Eh. The show's harmless enough, I suppose, but really, ASAL is so incredibly over the top that there's no way in hell I could ever believe that these people signed up for anything more than the money, the attention, and the easy feels.
And I agree with some of the commenters above--the whole "bisexual" thing pisses me off because Tequila is such a bisexual cliché: a narcissistic, indecisive, slutty, hot bi-babe. "Gee, thanks a lot, you fuck-puppet, for setting back bisexuals by 30 years," was my very first thought when I saw this show.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:58 PM on January 11, 2008
Stop thinking with your 'nads, nads.
Eh. The show's harmless enough, I suppose, but really, ASAL is so incredibly over the top that there's no way in hell I could ever believe that these people signed up for anything more than the money, the attention, and the easy feels.
And I agree with some of the commenters above--the whole "bisexual" thing pisses me off because Tequila is such a bisexual cliché: a narcissistic, indecisive, slutty, hot bi-babe. "Gee, thanks a lot, you fuck-puppet, for setting back bisexuals by 30 years," was my very first thought when I saw this show.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:58 PM on January 11, 2008
the whole "bisexual" thing pisses me off because Tequila is such a bisexual cliché: a narcissistic, indecisive, slutty, hot bi-babe.
This Tequila woman is a moron, but I don't know that the sudden deluge of 'bisexuals' is necessarily about indecisiveness. If someone, of any gender, is interested enough in you to find you sexually attractive, that's a major league turn-on just in terms of ego-gratification. And with same-sex behavior being more acceptable, more people are experimenting.
posted by jonmc at 7:22 PM on January 11, 2008
This Tequila woman is a moron, but I don't know that the sudden deluge of 'bisexuals' is necessarily about indecisiveness. If someone, of any gender, is interested enough in you to find you sexually attractive, that's a major league turn-on just in terms of ego-gratification. And with same-sex behavior being more acceptable, more people are experimenting.
posted by jonmc at 7:22 PM on January 11, 2008
I've never seen nor heard of this woman or show before this thread.
However, that picture in the Wiki looks like a real-life version of a Bratz doll.
posted by Ynoxas at 9:03 PM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
However, that picture in the Wiki looks like a real-life version of a Bratz doll.
posted by Ynoxas at 9:03 PM on January 11, 2008 [3 favorites]
This Tequila woman is a moron, but I don't know that the sudden deluge of 'bisexuals' is necessarily about indecisiveness. If someone, of any gender, is interested enough in you to find you sexually attractive, that's a major league turn-on just in terms of ego-gratification. And with same-sex behavior being more acceptable, more people are experimenting.
No, it's not about just indecisiveness, it's really more about being narcissistic and a pathological need for attention. I'm not disagreeing that it can (and maybe should) be a turn on for anyone to know that they're desired. But can you imagine MTV doing this show with a man in the lead?
posted by desuetude at 11:15 PM on January 11, 2008
No, it's not about just indecisiveness, it's really more about being narcissistic and a pathological need for attention. I'm not disagreeing that it can (and maybe should) be a turn on for anyone to know that they're desired. But can you imagine MTV doing this show with a man in the lead?
posted by desuetude at 11:15 PM on January 11, 2008
Heh, 90 comments, mostly from people who've never even seen the show, all pontificacting.
Look, I watched a few episodes; my grilf was into it (purely as an exercise in slumming, she assured me) and so naturally I got to see some of it. I am not proud of the moments I spent watching, though the almost-fight the cowboy dude nearly started was mostly awesome.
You are describing her acting talent in heaping praise upon the show. Honestly, who wants to watch a "reality show" for acting (unless it's acting in the sense of scheming for advantage)? The show was a sham from the get-go to play upon MTV's (and TT's) core demographic: horny 18-to-24-year-olds who yank it to inaccessible women on an hourly basis, mixed with a generous heaping of 18-to-40-year-old women who believe reality shows are Teh Truth (for extra ad revenue). It was not a Good Show. Go watch The Wire.
posted by m0nm0n at 4:03 AM on January 12, 2008
Look, I watched a few episodes; my grilf was into it (purely as an exercise in slumming, she assured me) and so naturally I got to see some of it. I am not proud of the moments I spent watching, though the almost-fight the cowboy dude nearly started was mostly awesome.
You are describing her acting talent in heaping praise upon the show. Honestly, who wants to watch a "reality show" for acting (unless it's acting in the sense of scheming for advantage)? The show was a sham from the get-go to play upon MTV's (and TT's) core demographic: horny 18-to-24-year-olds who yank it to inaccessible women on an hourly basis, mixed with a generous heaping of 18-to-40-year-old women who believe reality shows are Teh Truth (for extra ad revenue). It was not a Good Show. Go watch The Wire.
posted by m0nm0n at 4:03 AM on January 12, 2008
No, I meant gay men.
posted by Toekneesan at 5:34 AM on January 12, 2008
posted by Toekneesan at 5:34 AM on January 12, 2008
Dani has somewhat abandoned her career to be a "reality" celebrity.
After Ellen had a great interview with Dani as well as hilarious re-caps of each episode of A Shot At Love.
posted by k8t at 11:07 AM on January 12, 2008
After Ellen had a great interview with Dani as well as hilarious re-caps of each episode of A Shot At Love.
posted by k8t at 11:07 AM on January 12, 2008
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posted by drezdn at 7:33 AM on January 11, 2008 [1 favorite]