Join 3,514 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


But... they're all bishops!
January 12, 2008 2:26 PM   Subscribe

Dildo chess set (NSFW, probably). Other suggestive chess sets, part of a small collection of, er, pawnography.

[OK, I confess, I stole that joke.]
posted by GrammarMoses (41 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

 
Brings a whole new meaning to "opening theory".
posted by nthdegx at 2:29 PM on January 12, 2008


But do they double as ....er nevermind.
posted by cmgonzalez at 2:34 PM on January 12, 2008


Brings a whole new meaning to "beating the bishop."
posted by PlusDistance at 2:40 PM on January 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


The knights look a little cockeyed.
posted by doctor_negative at 2:48 PM on January 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


i like the fact that the guy who has the photo collection of sexy chess sets lists his email address like a personal ad (Vegard Krog Petersen, 35 years, male, librarian, Norway) and enjoys many hobbies, of which chess apparently isn't included. (My interests include computers, freeware, literature, games, fantasy & science fiction, medieval history, and deep sea fishing. I'm also fat and lazy, but my girlfriend Heidi likes me anyway!... :-) )
posted by msconduct at 2:59 PM on January 12, 2008


Exactly what about "dildo" wouldn't be NSFW provided you didn't work for a sex toy company?
posted by tommasz at 3:04 PM on January 12, 2008


Well, there's no Actual Nudity...?
posted by GrammarMoses at 3:05 PM on January 12, 2008


Nice use of the "obviousinretrospect" tag.
posted by whir at 3:12 PM on January 12, 2008


Guess you didn't look at the "collection" link, eh GM?
posted by LittleMissCranky at 3:30 PM on January 12, 2008


That link was for men only, LittleMissCranky!
posted by nthdegx at 3:33 PM on January 12, 2008 [3 favorites]


Oh, well, yeah I did. Pretty soft-core, that. But on the whole, point taken.
posted by GrammarMoses at 3:34 PM on January 12, 2008


hardly surprising, considering the oedipal subtext of chess: disabling the king, especially by separating him from his queen, if not capturing her outright.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:36 PM on January 12, 2008


Check Mate
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 3:41 PM on January 12, 2008


"Sexy" clearly means something completely different in Norwegian.
posted by forallmankind at 4:02 PM on January 12, 2008


I mean, sexy_chess_016.jpg - wtf???
posted by forallmankind at 4:04 PM on January 12, 2008


tommasz: Exactly what about "dildo" wouldn't be NSFW provided you didn't work for a sex toy company?

Well, the whalespotting tours are pretty family-friendly...
posted by hangashore at 4:08 PM on January 12, 2008


Come on, everyone knows Sophie Moone only plays Go.
posted by hototogisu at 4:12 PM on January 12, 2008


Nigel Tufnel: What's wrong with bein' sexy?
posted by The_Partridge_Family at 4:19 PM on January 12, 2008


this thread is useless without pictures.

from the world chess beauty contest, that is.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:26 PM on January 12, 2008


And then there's Love Chess ...
posted by madamjujujive at 4:30 PM on January 12, 2008


oh, mefi / mefi to log in to the world chess beauty contest site
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:30 PM on January 12, 2008


UbuRoivas, that such a thing exists at all -- I mean -- god bless the internets. [sniff]
posted by device55 at 4:31 PM on January 12, 2008


Unfortuantely, that chess set would be illegal in Texas.
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 4:32 PM on January 12, 2008


Welcome to the world of LoveChess! With its combination of erotica and chess, LoveChess was the first erotic game that showed sexual action in a stylish, humorous and light-hearted way. Now, this unique concept got even better with the release of Lovechess : Age of Egypt.

Yea, King Tut was apparently the result of about a dozen consecutive brother-sister marriages, so i guess it's a game the whole family can enjoy.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:35 PM on January 12, 2008


"Knight jumps Queen! Bishop jumps queen! Pawns jump queen! Gang-bang!" -Mel Brooks, History of the World Part 1
posted by clevershark at 5:35 PM on January 12, 2008


Exactly what about "dildo" wouldn't be NSFW provided you didn't work for a sex toy company?


I hate the NSFW tag. What kind of workplace would punish a worker for seeing a dildo, but tolerate surfing MetaFilter all day? Other than Liberty University, I mean.

This W-place made famous by NSFW... does it exist?
posted by rokusan at 5:42 PM on January 12, 2008


Come on, everyone knows Sophie Moone only plays Go
I'm trying to figure out why you didn't go with poker.
posted by fleacircus at 6:08 PM on January 12, 2008


What kind of workplace would punish a worker for seeing a dildo, but tolerate surfing MetaFilter all day?

I think the idea is that if someone walks past your cubicle and sees you browsing photos of vulva, they may react differently than if they see you looking at a screen full of words.
posted by shakespeherian at 6:35 PM on January 12, 2008


Huh, pawnography. Grammar Moses, you're naughty.

Must be something in the air, pre-Spring hormones or something I was also going to do a naughty fpp, not really pr0n but yeah, maybe it is, probably way too graphic, and didn't have the guts.

A scantily clad chessplayer on the hallway floor. But why?

In keeping with the odd chess set theme, one made with co-axial cable connector gizmos.

Googling chess + sex I came across this fun video animated short but I have no idea why the sex tag was included. Chess Wars.
posted by nickyskye at 6:44 PM on January 12, 2008


I don't get it. What's the point? Chess and sex? Completely incompatible functionality.
posted by semmi at 8:58 PM on January 12, 2008


I hate the NSFW tag. What kind of workplace would punish a worker for seeing a dildo, but tolerate surfing MetaFilter all day? Other than Liberty University, I mean.

Fakeposting is awesome!
posted by Mikey-San at 10:53 PM on January 12, 2008


Awesome nickyskye! So, is it 50Ω vs. 75Ω?
posted by Chuckles at 11:14 PM on January 12, 2008


nickyskye writes "A scantily clad chessplayer on the hallway floor. But why? "

Uh, Rule 34 (NSFW)?
posted by Mitheral at 11:28 PM on January 12, 2008


So, is it 50Ω vs. 75Ω?

A meditation on ohm?

Rule

God I love xkdc. Such great comics and d'oh, you're so right about the 34 thing.
posted by nickyskye at 11:50 PM on January 12, 2008


I hate the NSFW tag. What kind of workplace would punish a worker for seeing a dildo, but tolerate surfing MetaFilter all day? Other than Liberty University, I mean.

There are an increasing number of companies that will tolerate a lot of more-or-less recreational web browsing from work, as long as you're getting your stuff done. I've worked at some.

However, porn on the company computer would get you an immediate referral to HR for termination at pretty much every place I've ever drawn a paycheck, independent of their feelings on browsing. Reading Metafilter is goofing off. Looking at porn is putting the company at risk of a sexual harassment lawsuit.

There's a vast gaping chasm between Metafilter and porn, as intellectually masturbatory as it sometimes gets...
posted by Kadin2048 at 1:05 AM on January 13, 2008


I once saw a great Elvis chess set in a shop in Sydney.

The pawns were pills, the rooks were graceland, the knights were cadillacs, the queen was Priscilla, the bishops were burgers, and the king was of course Elvis.

I wish I bought it, but I was an unemployed bum at the time.
posted by mattoxic at 5:16 AM on January 13, 2008


Phew, I thought this FPP said Dildo Cheese for a second and though oh no not this crap again.

Really people enough with the p3nis/di1do/Pha11ic nonsense! Get a grip!
posted by Skygazer at 9:02 AM on January 13, 2008


Get a grip!

Like this?
posted by GrammarMoses at 9:25 AM on January 13, 2008


Exactly!
posted by Skygazer at 7:56 AM on January 14, 2008


Funny. Good thread.
posted by nickyskye at 1:45 PM on January 14, 2008


It wouldn't be complete without the sexiest, most beautifully filmed chess match of all time:

Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway in The Thomas Crown Affair. (SFW)

(Although if you're a guy standing, you probably won't be).

posted by Skygazer at 8:21 PM on January 14, 2008 [1 favorite]


« Older FISA wiretapping: keeping us safe in the war on te...  |  The Overdub Tampering Comittee... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments