Comments on: A fine whine

A fine whine

stupidsexyFlanders — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:12:07 -0800

Finally, one central point of aggregation for the complaints of white people. So this solves that problem -- now, who's going to make a mayonnaise jar with a mouth wide enough to make it easy to scrape out the last bits? GOSH!

By: dersins

dersins — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:18:40 -0800

LOL WHITE PEOPLE COMPLAIN LIKE THAT BUT BLACK PEOPLE COMPLAIN LIKE THIS AMIRITE?

By: elpapacito

elpapacito — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:18:45 -0800

LolGrumpywhitey OK, but ppppffttt needs more characterization I guess. It's not like I am whineying, just pointing out ! Assholes.

By: jedicus

jedicus — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:21:35 -0800

The mayonnaise companies have heard your complaint, and they have responded thus. Yes, mere squeeze bottles of mayonnaise were not effective enough, and now the bottles are "non-stick" to ensure you can get every last bit of delicious soybean oil emulsion.

By: Dizzy

Dizzy — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:21:53 -0800

Yeah-- why the color card? We're "not supposed" to play it in politics, but it seems to be coming out in other venues--is it because we can't stop thinking how different ( i.e. superior) we are?

By: jedicus

jedicus — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:25:14 -0800

Also, many of the complaints are obviously artificial and none of them, artificial or otherwise, are very funny. And seconding dersins.

By: jquinby

jquinby — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:25:31 -0800

White people! Black people!

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:27:13 -0800

/thread

By: empath

empath — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:28:01 -0800

Not white enough.

By: Brandon Blatcher

Brandon Blatcher — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:28:37 -0800

don make put a cap up in ya post.

By: Atom Eyes

Atom Eyes — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:30:08 -0800

I HAVE NO MELANIN & I MUST KVETCH

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:30:47 -0800

Let privileged whining ring. And when this happens, and when we allow privileged whining ring—when we whine from every sauna and every ski chalet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children—black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics—will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: "Chanel at last! Yachts at last! Thank God Almighty, we have a summer home at Tuckahoe at last!"

By: jquinby

jquinby — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:33:06 -0800

On another note, we made some mayo at home during the summer. It really was tasty, but turned scary pretty quick in the fridge. My current favorite mayo is the Trader Joe's Wasabi Mayo, which I learned about on an askmefi. Quite good on a turkey sandwich.

By: The Light Fantastic

The Light Fantastic — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:33:42 -0800

Huh...I thought I was white....guess not.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:36:36 -0800

Hmm, well there are lots of white people who have a pretty raw deal in this country. No health insurance, etc.

By: abulafa

abulafa — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:37:59 -0800

I feel responsible for this. So, so sorry.

By: Wolfdog

Wolfdog — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:38:04 -0800

Mm, tumblr. It's web 2.0, at least mod 2.

By: borkingchikapa

borkingchikapa — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:40:56 -0800

Hilarious, this thread is a bunch of white people complaining about stereotyping white people. I thought the link was funny.

By: griphus

griphus — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:41:55 -0800

I was about to complain about the subway map and then I got it. Well played, White Whine, well played.

By: Stynxno

Stynxno — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:44:05 -0800

what, no lolwhitepeople tag?

By: porn in the woods

porn in the woods — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:46:18 -0800

OK, this was great: "Honestly, what self-respecting bar doesn't have Heineken?"

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:46:55 -0800

the white nyc subway map is hysterical.

By: chunking express

chunking express — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:49:55 -0800

This site is awesome.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:56:44 -0800

I likes the subway map. The rest of the site, meh. The Wings whine was funny.

By: Armitage Shanks

Armitage Shanks — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:58:32 -0800

White people don't take the subway to JFK.

By: hellslinger

hellslinger — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:03:09 -0800

BORING.

By: porn in the woods

porn in the woods — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:04:04 -0800

Hootie and the Blowfish ARE BREAKING UP!??!?

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:04:42 -0800

"Honestly, what self-respecting bar doesn't have Heineken?" Obligatory Blue Velvet clip. (NSFW- Hopper being Hopper)

By: raysmj

raysmj — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:10:06 -0800

Honestly, what self-respecting bar doesn't have Heineken? Last spring, I helped clean up a small park in New Orleans that serves a predominantly black neighborhood. The single most commonly found items of litter I found around the park were Heineken bottle caps--I'm talking dozens upon dozens of them, on the curbs, underneath baseball bleachers, clusters found at random, etc.

By: alasdair

alasdair — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:11:05 -0800

Now on my Learn a New Thing Every Day List: Americans have a stereotype that black people don't like mayonnaise (or that white people really like mayonnaise? Quick Googling suggested the former.) Where does this come from? Is it a stereotype held by both black people and white people?

By: lonefrontranger

lonefrontranger — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:15:19 -0800

delmoi lots of people don't have health insurance in the U.S. Age, gender, race, etc... have nothing to do with that.

By: Skorgu

Skorgu — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:24:17 -0800

White people also don't go to Mets games.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:29:14 -0800

I thought it was interesting, but I'd call it yuppie whine, not white whine.

By: LordSludge

LordSludge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:32:43 -0800

lonefrontranger: lots of people don't have health insurance in the U.S. Age, gender, race, etc... ~~have nothing to do with that.~~ are all factors.

By: prosthezis

prosthezis — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:32:58 -0800

Maybe I can bond with some black people over our mutual hatred of mayonnaise. I never knew. Oh shit, I wonder if I'm black?

By: LordSludge

LordSludge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:33:18 -0800

just sayin...

By: batmonkey

batmonkey — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:36:12 -0800

Should say "privileged" white people. Those of us who grew up in the real world don't worry about such triflin' BS. And would never be shallow and selfish enough to brag about such useless concerns. Bleah. Irritating.

By: maxwelton

maxwelton — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:39:42 -0800

Mayonnaise hating is something I can get behind. Appalling substance.

By: cashman

cashman — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:47:22 -0800

Americans have a stereotype that black people don't like mayonnaise Ya momma. I love mayo. On hot dogs, on sandwiches, on any kind of burger. I think I love horseradish just because it's like mayo's spicy aunt.

By: ethnomethodologist

ethnomethodologist — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:49:46 -0800

Where in the fuck did anybody get the idea that non-whites don't like mayonnaise?

By: CKmtl

CKmtl — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:55:49 -0800

the white nyc subway map is hysterical. I likes the subway map. Is this something you'd have to have been in NYC for more than an hour changing buses in the bowels of Port Authority to understand?

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:57:52 -0800

White people also don't go to Mets games. Nonsense, piffle, bosh, eyewash.

By: Atreides

Atreides — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:00:11 -0800

As a white person, I have to say I was shocked and frightened at how that website crawled into my brain and ripped out all my daily concerns, grievances, and worries. This must be how it would have been like if Kirk had met Evil Kirk sans the Evil. ...

By: prosthezis

prosthezis — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:01:06 -0800

Where in the fuck did anybody get the idea that non-whites don't like mayonnaise? It was in this month's newsletter. If you are white you should've gotten it. If you're not then you're not supposed to know that you don't like mayonnaise so forget we said anything.

By: Armitage Shanks

Armitage Shanks — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:04:18 -0800

If you're going to fit in to white America, you're gonna have to learn to like MAYONNAISE!

By: cazoo

cazoo — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:08:25 -0800

Wait when did white people corner the market on mayo love? I'm Asian and we get down with the Kewpie

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:11:04 -0800

so this whole kerfuffle about may was an Underover Brother reference?! For fuck's sake, people.

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:11:49 -0800

*mayo

By: prosthezis

prosthezis — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:13:41 -0800

Undercover Brother is way over my head.

By: Atom Eyes

Atom Eyes — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:23:31 -0800

I think mayo-liking is more an indicator of a lack of strong ethnic identity (think WASP) than whiteness per se, at least according to the stereotype. It marks the contrast between the likes of Chet, the sweater-wearing Pine Hills tennis pro and that of Herschel, the Pastrami-eating pawnbroker, or Vinnie, the meatball-munching Goombah.

By: Armitage Shanks

Armitage Shanks — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:23:39 -0800

so this whole kerfuffle about may was an Underover Brother reference?! For fuck's sake, people. Well, not just that.

By: Bathtub Bobsled

Bathtub Bobsled — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:30:00 -0800

OJ didn't do it.

By: agentofselection

agentofselection — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:34:30 -0800

If you don't get the subway map, com pare.

By: cashman

cashman — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 13:26:22 -0800

From an FCC link from Armitage Shanks google search: "A major mayonnaise manufacturer refused to buy commercial time based upon the perception that "Black people don't eat mayonnaise." (National Association of Black Owned Broadcasters, Spring Conference, 1997, page 2 of report)" Oh I have simply got to see the original report by the NABOB. If it references the yo momma joke "I saw your momma kicking an mayonnaise jar down the street, so I asked her what she was doing---she said "Moving", I totally win.

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 13:53:42 -0800

alasdair writes "Now on my Learn a New Thing Every Day List: Americans have a stereotype that black people don't like mayonnaise" Huh. That's totally news to me. Japanese, on the other hand, fucking LOOOOOOOOVE mayonnaise. I'm guessing it's just that black people don't like Japanese people.

By: Mister Cheese

Mister Cheese — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:05:30 -0800

This website disgust me. It stereotypes people of the caucasoid phenotype as privileged whiners. One of my best friends in High School was white. He had trouble paying for college; unfortunately, his 1/16th Indian blood did not qualify him for any minority heritage scholarships.

By: nebulawindphone

nebulawindphone — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:05:40 -0800

Well, yeah. Japanese people taste funny.

By: EatTheWeak

EatTheWeak — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:36:59 -0800

This site is hilarious and mayonnaise is delicious.

By: Fuzzy Monster

Fuzzy Monster — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 15:25:50 -0800

The mayo thing predates Undercover Brother. From The Jerk (1979): "I cooked up your favourite meal: tuna fish salad on white bread with mayonnaise, a Tab and a couple of Twinkies." I bet it predates "The Jerk," too. If you haven't seen 'The Jerk'... go rent it!

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 15:27:21 -0800

fuzzy monster, that was a white guy who thought he was black and who loved mayonnaise. different animal entirely.

By: CitizenD

CitizenD — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 15:36:29 -0800

agent of selection -- thanks for the reference point. i "got" that the altered map must not show lines going to "certain" parts of the city, but i had no idea how graphic the difference was. funny!!

By: Fuzzy Monster

Fuzzy Monster — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 15:44:19 -0800

shmegegge: in the scene in question... Steve Martin's character thinks he's a "poor black child," but he always feels a bit different than the rest of his family. He loves different food and different music than the rest of his family. While the rest of his family is eating soul food ("Black"), Steve Martin's Mom cooks him his favorite food: tuna fish salad on white bread with mayo ("White). The whole point of the scene is to contrast his personal likes and dislikes, which are stereotypically white, with the likes of the rest of his family, which are stereotypically black. The above scene illustrates that "white people like mayonnaise" is a well-known stereotype since at least 1979. This stereotype can be found again in the Undercover Brother quote earlier in this thread: "If you're going to fit in to white America, you're gonna have to learn to like MAYONNAISE!" This stereotype can also be found in the FPP: "now, who's going to make a mayonnaise jar with a mouth wide enough to make it easy to scrape out the last bits?" Same animal, my friend.

By: misha

misha — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 16:07:10 -0800

Mayonnaise is teh suck. I'm right with prosthezis and maxwelton on this one. [MAYOIST]

By: bunnytricks

bunnytricks — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 17:30:24 -0800

While I find mayo absolutely revolting, for some reason I love the vinegary tang of miracle whip. I also douse french fries with A1 sauce.

By: fuq

fuq — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 17:36:42 -0800

To learn more about white people, and even see some pictures of what white people look like and how they dress, look at blackpeopleloveus.com. Wow! There's just so much to learn about white people!

By: concrete

concrete — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 18:40:43 -0800

While I find mayo absolutely revolting, for some reason I love the vinegary tang of miracle whip. That was usually the stereotype I heard about white people.

By: maxwelton

maxwelton — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:08:44 -0800

"Tunafish" as glopped onto sandwiches is basically canned dolphin mixed with mayo in the first place, isn't it? So a tunafish sandwich with mayo is like a mayo sandwich with extra mayo plus some tropical fish flakes. Gag me. You can put the "relish" or "secret sauce" burger joints put on burgers in that disgusting category as well. It's ketchup, mayo and something pickled (shoes? beets? foreskins?) put in a blender and then puked onto a bun.

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 14:13:47 -0800

I hate mayonnaise myself too, but it has a fascinating history. The site's a one-trick joke, based on the old bit about "white people problems." Chris Rock has been the most popular recent purveyor of that one, I think.