Stuff White People Like

February 13, 2008 2:42 PM

Stuff White People Like Swimming, Mos Def, Expensive Sandwiches, Etc.
posted by chunking express (33 comments total)

Yawn.
posted by delmoi at 2:47 PM on February 13, 2008

Oh, no......
posted by CynicalKnight at 2:47 PM on February 13, 2008

lol ... I loved the expensive sandwiches. I like cheap sandwiches too! Really ... I just like sandwiches. But it better come with a good pickle spear on the side!
posted by Arbac at 2:47 PM on February 13, 2008 [1 favorite]

White People/Black People
posted by Bathtub Bobsled at 2:48 PM on February 13, 2008 [1 favorite]

How about lists of things that white people like? Do white people like those?
posted by nebulawindphone at 2:48 PM on February 13, 2008

I keep waiting for a punch line. Or something offensive. Or at least edgy. I guess this white person likes waiting.
posted by GuyZero at 2:50 PM on February 13, 2008

OK, I finally laughed:

"All white people are born with a singular mission in life in order to pass from regular whitehood into ultra-whitehood. Much like how Muslims have to visit Mecca, all white people must eventually renovate a house before they can be complete."

And in my new blog, "Things Brown People Like": Mecca!
posted by GuyZero at 2:52 PM on February 13, 2008

"It's such a fine line between stupid, and clever."

(white people like Spinal Tap.)
posted by Auden at 2:55 PM on February 13, 2008

Also: I work in the most inner of inner cities. Everyone rides bikes. (punchline: cos they can't afford cars!)
posted by absalom at 2:55 PM on February 13, 2008

Yes, white people like all of these things, Mr. Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc.

Also, you know that not all white people are rich or yuppies, right?
posted by klangklangston at 2:58 PM on February 13, 2008

I was expecting this to be funny and I was disappointed. Trying to construct a Whiteness based on the entries in the blog is pretty entertaining, though. I picture a Lincoln Park trixie trying to emulate the "hipsters" at her office.
posted by jtron at 2:58 PM on February 13, 2008

Condescending, arrogant, stupid. Yeah, that about sums it up.
posted by deadmessenger at 3:01 PM on February 13, 2008

Also, you know that not all white people are rich or yuppies, right?

The rest are rednecks/white trash, right?
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 3:01 PM on February 13, 2008

White people like lists.
posted by cazoo at 3:01 PM on February 13, 2008 [1 favorite]

I accidentally favorited this when I wanted to flag it as racist/offensive.

Just so you know.
posted by tkchrist at 3:02 PM on February 13, 2008

Bunch of tight-panty crackers up in this thread.
posted by Mikey-San at 3:03 PM on February 13, 2008

LOLWHITEY 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO
posted by dersins at 3:04 PM on February 13, 2008

I too flagged it as racist. Partly because it's unfunny, partly because if this weren't about white people I'm not sure it'd have much of a chance, but mostly because it's just racist by definition.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 3:07 PM on February 13, 2008

Black People Love Us
posted by infinitewindow at 3:07 PM on February 13, 2008

This was fucking hilarious, and hit uncomfortably close to home!
posted by schroedinger at 3:08 PM on February 13, 2008

It took me a while, but I finally found something funny -- some freeper who thinks this site is high comedy:

I have to admit, this site needs to be called
“stuff liberal hippies like” since it basically encompasses everything an anti-american, liberal, Berkeley loving, sandal and tie dye wearing, New York Time reading hippie would like. Other than that I absolutely love this site, these liberal creeps do display such contradictions with everything…I love the holding high diversity but sending their ids to private schools. These people needs to get to work and contribute to society.

I totally sent my id to private school!
posted by M.C. Lo-Carb! at 3:09 PM on February 13, 2008

Metafilter: Stuff White People Like
posted by designbot at 3:11 PM on February 13, 2008

Thanks for letting me know tkchrist. Don't let me oppress you.
posted by chunking express at 3:12 PM on February 13, 2008

I love both Manhattan Transfer and Wayne Brady and I don't care who knows it.
posted by porn in the woods at 3:12 PM on February 13, 2008

there is a special category of bicycles that appeal far more to white women, the European city bike (pictured). White women have a lot of fantasies about idealized lives, and one of them is living in Europe and riding around an old city on one of these bikes. They dream about waking up and riding to a little cafe, then visiting bakeries and cheese shops and finally riding home to prepare a fancy meal for their friends who will all eat under a canopy with white Christmas lights. This information can be used to help gain the trust/admiration of a white woman, especially if you can pull off a lie about how your mother told you about how she used to do all of these things when she was younger.

awesome!

the japan bit was also pretty funny.

and for what it's worth, i'm prejudiced against all races.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:12 PM on February 13, 2008

#11 should go over well.
posted by Jay Reimenschneider at 3:13 PM on February 13, 2008

Coffee, marijuana and kitchen appliances. What can I say, the man has me nailed.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:13 PM on February 13, 2008

I totally sent my id to private school!

the only reasonable thing to do. how else is it going to become repressed?
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:14 PM on February 13, 2008

I am #63!
posted by Duncan at 3:14 PM on February 13, 2008

Damnit. My resolve broke as I went on.

#22 Having Two Last Names
#16 “Gifted” Children
#13 Tea

The earlier stuff seems funnier, more absurd. Especially with the tea one.
"If you find yourself in a situation with a white person, acceptable things to say include “I’m really into tea right now,” or “my favorite thing is to get a nice cup of tea and curl up in a chair with a good book.” But do not remind them about the role of colonialism in tea, it will make them feel sad."
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 3:17 PM on February 13, 2008

I'm apparently not white.

I'm okay with that, considering what I'd have to be down with.
posted by batmonkey at 3:17 PM on February 13, 2008

I accidentally favorited this when I wanted to flag it as racist/offensive.

What?! I'm white and since I'm white that means I'm qualified to speak on behalf of all white people and I would like to say that a)this isn't offensive and b)it's all 100% true.
posted by fuq at 3:19 PM on February 13, 2008

Indie Music:...blah blah blah..."white people hate anything that’s “mainstream” " blah blah blah.

At least it's a departure from the stupid stereotype that white people love anything that's mainstream. Anyway, flagged as racist.
posted by Cookiebastard at 3:19 PM on February 13, 2008