February 16, 2008 10:04 PM Subscribe
posted by TimTypeZed (63 comments total)
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Another weekend sitting alone in your apartment? Thinking of sending that two thousand word cry for help to anonymous Ask Metafilter? Maybe you should take a look at the advice at Succeed Socially
The site is a series of articles from a guy in his late twenties who was socially awkward when younger, tried various ways to overcome his difficulties, and eventually found his own way of becoming more comfortable around others. Much of it is good practical discussion, free of both whininess and magic solutions.
How to be More Fun / How to be Less Boring
If you're more restrained yourself that's fine, but it's not the end of the world if not everyone else is. Try to take yourself less seriously too. Don't think you're above letting yourself go and acting 'immature' or whatever. Above all, don't think being smart and mature, and being a fun person are mutually exclusive. Being able to joke around and have a good time doesn't cancel out or diminish your intelligence.
When You Want To Do Better With People... But Not Really
Another reason some people are down on socializing is because they're not comfortable with it. They may have some bitter feelings towards the idea of relating to people because of past experiences. It's easier for them to tell themselves that people and socializing aren't worth their time. That way it's not their fault, some flaw in the outside world is to blame.
Inside The Mind Of Guys Who Are Shy And Inexperienced With Women
The idea that if I wanted a girlfriend I'd have to actively work on getting one, or that I'd have to learn to cope with my nervousness wasn't on the map. Nope, I just had to meet the perfect girl under the perfect circumstances. The kind of circumstances where I would essentially be guided along by rails the whole way with no room to screw up.
Social Skills And Self-Help Advice That Hasn't Worked For Me
This stuff didn't work for me because I found it either too vague or too 'easier said than done'. You can interpret "Be Yourself" in two dozen different ways, some of them more helpful than others. And you can't just hit a switch in a your brain and be confident, it takes time.