Comments on: Traumatic anal intercourse with a pig

Traumatic anal intercourse with a pig

homunculus — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:41:14 -0800

a rare cause of traumatic injury to the rectum (first link PDF). Related post.

By: isopraxis

isopraxis — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:46:15 -0800

. . . damn near killed 'im

By: Foci for Analysis

Foci for Analysis — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:49:44 -0800

You've got to love the diagram of the boar's erected penis. And by love I mean be slightly disturbed.

By: blender

blender — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:53:48 -0800

Mental note: avoid homunculus immediately after dinner. Also, we've previously heard about the horse.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 02:59:11 -0800

If a bolt has a left hand thread, and you try and use it with a nut that has a right hand thread, you really shouldn't be surprised when you find the poor nut gets it's thread all torn off. Especially when you're using a power driver with the torque of a boar on heat.

By: farishta

farishta — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 03:01:07 -0800

Metafilter: a rare cause of traumatic injury to the rectum.

By: wendell

wendell — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 03:10:58 -0800

Metafilter: a power driver with the torque of a boar on heat.

By: Henry C. Mabuse

Henry C. Mabuse — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 03:11:15 -0800

I don't think this farmer could have been rasher in getting porked, unless trottering off into hamicide. I mean he could have got smoked.

By: Abiezer

Abiezer — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 03:34:00 -0800

A pig in a poke will likely be a bad deal; a poke from a pig is a whole other order of bad.

By: mattoxic

mattoxic — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 03:40:01 -0800

(raptor species have been reported co-operating to flush prey, as have coyotes and American badgers) Obviously that raptor reporting took place in Jurassic Park. But coyotes and American badgers, surely not.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:04:18 -0800

No, no.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:05:14 -0800

I don't understand. The Bulgarian farmer liked getting fucked up the ass by a pig?

By: srboisvert

srboisvert — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:11:01 -0800

I will never again say that only the boring are bored.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:11:27 -0800

No, no. Harder, piggy, harder!

By: de

de — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:24:52 -0800

> I don't understand. well, the poor farmer was probably looking for small torque; he simply picked the wrong boar.

By: Dizzy

Dizzy — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:26:57 -0800

Thank you for turning me into a nine-year-old.

By: Kirth Gerson

Kirth Gerson — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:28:26 -0800

If a bolt has a left hand thread, and you try and use it with a nut that has a right hand thread ... Don't get me started.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:30:26 -0800

Apologies to Bob Dylan I pity the Bulgarian pig farmer, Alone upon his land, Who after many lonely years, Grows tired of his hand, And so he turns to other things, The sheep, the cows the dogs, But experiment grows tragic, When attention turns to hogs. I pity the poor pig farmer, Had he but stuck with fowl, He might have kept his rectum, He might have kept his bowel, But he had to turn to other things, Cause life was such a drag, But it wasn't half as miserable, As shitting in a bag. The scene was so romantic, He'd been there oft before, A stable lit by candle light, A mattress made of straw, But the pig had different ideas, One too many farmyard clout, Had given the pig an inkling, To fuck his insides out I pity the poor pigfarmer, And heed my good advice It's something that we all might do, When we're cut off from vice, If you have to screw an animal, Be cautious of it's strength, And examine well it's penis, For barbs and girth and length And should you find it much too big, Or fear that it won't stop, Make sure the beast is underneath And you are on the top.

By: XMLicious

XMLicious — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:38:58 -0800

♪ Hakuna Matata…♫

By: pracowity

pracowity — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:51:44 -0800

Anyone have sex with a boar has to be a little twisted inside.

By: Poolio

Poolio — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:56:42 -0800

Now that's what I call getting porked.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 04:58:53 -0800

[boar joke] [/boar joke]

By: dgaicun

dgaicun — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:00:31 -0800

Wow, he sure got baconed in his asshole. Sorry, I got nothing.

By: cgc373

cgc373 — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:12:12 -0800

It is perhaps unfortunate that I refuse to click those links, however, I will comfort myself in the hope that I have seen enough sick and/or disgusting stuff for a while, and I will also comfort myself by adding a MetaFilter: joke to the thread, to wit: MetaFilter: a whole other order of bad. Thank you, and good night.

By: Joseph Gurl

Joseph Gurl — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:14:52 -0800

This really isn't funny, people. A man is dead. HAVE YOU NO SHAME?

By: HuronBob

HuronBob — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:24:19 -0800

We Have A WINNER!!! No, no.... not the guy in the link....but THIS POST! This is the first post in weeks that has cause me to actually YEARN for more politiFilter!

By: XMLicious

XMLicious — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:29:12 -0800

This really isn't funny, people. A man is dead. HAVE YOU NO SHAME? ??

“A 62 year old male Bulgarian farmer suffered from abdominal pain, and it was eventually discovered that the cause of the pain was a 0.5 cm ragged tear of the rectal wall. This was repaired and the patient recovered without event.”

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:32:18 -0800

Joseph Gurl writes "This really isn't funny, people. A man is dead. HAVE YOU NO SHAME?" Eponysterical.

By: dgaicun

dgaicun — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:37:28 -0800

Wait, OK, I got it!: He sure hogged that penis... with his butt...hole... Nevermind, still don't got it.

By: PlusDistance

PlusDistance — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:08:36 -0800

SOME PIG* --------- * answer to the question, "So, Vassily, you gettin' any?"

By: dawson

dawson — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:20:40 -0800

This vid, while only involving a small cadaver, make my balls ache up in my belly. Also, a classic Straight Dope.

By: Poolio

Poolio — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:23:12 -0800

Boink, Boink!

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:24:09 -0800

i think this farmer took the phrase "back bacon" just a bit too literally

By: signal

signal — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:35:09 -0800

your puns sure are funny

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:48:12 -0800

NNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRYESSSSSSSS! That'll do, pig. That'll do.

By: kolophon

kolophon — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 07:06:05 -0800

your puns sure are funny and by funny you mean not funny.

By: CitizenD

CitizenD — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 07:32:19 -0800

zoo is a documentary that was released last year. (no, it doesn't actually document acts of zoophilia). it is loosly organized around the case of a man in WA state who *did* die after an encounter with a horse (complicating factors including his friends' hesitation to get him to the ER). it's not the best documentary ever made, but it is quite interesting. i found it fascinating that the director actually got several of the men involved in the case, zoophiliacs all, to talk on camera. it's a pretty rare look into a forbidden subculture.

By: moonbird

moonbird — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 07:40:18 -0800

This puts into question the Southern delicacy of "pig in a blanket."

By: lalochezia

lalochezia — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 07:48:34 -0800

+1 for the SwinePenis tag. Cock 2.0?

By: wigu

wigu — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 07:53:06 -0800

Why did I choose to write this article? ... it took ten minutes to write and is bound to prove popular. They're on to us.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:17:02 -0800

it's not the best documentary ever made You can surely say that again. I struggled to figure out how anyone could make such a boring documentary, given material that was so intrinsically interesting. I put it down to lazyness on the part of the film maker. Having secured the interviews with his pig fuckers, he decided that he had it in the bag, so he really wasn't going to bother with providing a wider historical, cultural and social context. But even his interviews with the pig fuckers weren't that great. Again, I had the impression that he'd do a one take interview and boof, that was it, got it in the bag. The documentary made by Channel 4 a couple of years ago, Animal Passion, is a much better treatment of the subject, IMO. At least in that, the pigfuckers come across as real, three dimensional human beings -- albeit human beings with a rather unnatural interest in corks and beads, pigs and donkeys, etc. I didn't develop any sympathy for anyone in this movie at all. Very, very disappointing.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:19:03 -0800

Wow, some animals really are more equal than others.

By: mrbill

mrbill — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:25:13 -0800

I guess this would be "squeal for the piggy" instead of "squeal like a piggy". Oink Oink.

By: not_on_display

not_on_display — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:26:25 -0800

Is this the thread where I say how many animals I've tagged and released?

By: mrbill

mrbill — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:26:41 -0800

If you value your mental health and sanity at all, I beg you, please, do NOT do a Google search for "mrhands.mpg". (re: above-referenced horse incident)

By: mosk

mosk — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:39:59 -0800

> Wow, some animals really are more equal than others. Or, "Two legs good, four legs baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad."

By: Tube

Tube — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:42:24 -0800

This is outstanding, thank you. Best of the Web, indeed. What's wonderful about this is that the journal article is not hidden behind a paywall. I suspect, but do not know for a fact, that this is the case with most of the really juicy forensic science articles. The fee to view online my all time favorite journal article, The Love Bug, by JC Rupp is twenty-five dollars! Briefly, The Love Bug details how a 40 year old airline pilot died while engaging in bizarre auto-erotic(!) practice. He and his Volkswagen Bug found a remote location that was flat and bare, and larger than the turning radius of his car. He securely lashed the steering wheel "in the extreme counterclockwise direction", and set the car in low gear. He was attached to the rear bumper of the car by a 10 foot chain and a custom chain body harness "very similar in construction to a parachute harness"' "It is not known whether the subject simply allowed jogged after the moving automobile or allowed himself to be dragged." "When the subject tired of this form of exercise, he apparently approached the car with the intent of taking it out of gear or turning off the ignition." "At this point there was a serious "pilot error", for he neglected to detach himself from the chain on the bumper of the Volkswagen before he approached the car. As he approached the car, the chain attaching him to the bumper became slack and the back wheel of the car rolled over the chain. The chain then began revolving onto the back axle." "Ultimately, the chain wound completely around the axle and the subject was asphyxiated against the rear fender of the Volkswagen." And yes, the term "pilot error" is Rupp's, not mine

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:46:15 -0800

Well, this has almost put me off sex with animals.

By: papakwanz

papakwanz — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 08:59:09 -0800

If it isn't traumatic, you're not doing it right!

By: Tube

Tube — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:16:31 -0800

It looks like YouTube has the entire Animal Passion documentary uploaded. It does look quite good, and I'm impressed that they had the good sense to interview John Money, who was undoubtedly the world's foremost sex researcher. A different sort of "pony request", indeed...

By: patricio

patricio — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:28:24 -0800

I can more or less remember watching that Animal Passion documentary when it was first broadcast. The level of self-deception and rationalisation is incredible - the woman who regularly had sex with her alsatian honestly believed that "he started it" was sufficient justification and the man who described the horse he shagged as "having a gleam in her eye" and giving him the come on.

By: homunculus

homunculus — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:34:01 -0800

Mental note: avoid homunculus immediately after dinner. Speaking of dinner: New Restaurant lets you Pork your Pork

By: TheOnlyCoolTim

TheOnlyCoolTim — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:48:01 -0800

Post-operatively, he declined discussing perforation’s etiology. Psychiatric evaluation was requested. The patient eventually confessed that the complaints started after he committed sexual intercourse with a boar. Poor dude just got torn a new one, they can't even leave him alone about it and have to bug him until he tells them all the embarrassing details?

By: gimonca

gimonca — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:19:05 -0800

Th-th-th-th-th-th-That's All, Folks!

By: ORthey

ORthey — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:26:35 -0800

Reminds me of that one really disturbing Onion article about a zookeeper dying after being raped by a bear. WTF was up with that one??

By: ryanhealy

ryanhealy — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:35:14 -0800

CitizenD: Zoo is a dramatization like you'd see on Unsolved Mysteries. Categorizing it as a documentary is misleading. It's also very, very, very, very bad.

By: darkstar

darkstar — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:42:31 -0800

Boar's Head™.

By: schroedinger

schroedinger — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:49:50 -0800

He should have stuck with the animal dildos. Seals, hyenas, and gryphons (gryphons?!), oh my! Then there's Thor. Thor is really worth the look. I have been waiting for an opportunity to post this on Metafilter for YEARS.

By: darkstar

darkstar — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 10:56:47 -0800

Well of courth he wath thor!

By: jason's_planet

jason's_planet — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 11:01:19 -0800

SQUEAL LIKE A PIG! SQUEEEEEEEAL LIKE A PIG! sorry

By: fandango_matt

fandango_matt — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 11:04:01 -0800

posted by PeterMcDermott At least in that, the pigfuckers come across as real, three dimensional human beings Dude, don't say "pigfucker" in front of Jesus!

By: Ambrosia Voyeur

Ambrosia Voyeur — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 11:25:27 -0800

They all pay... in the end.

By: Wanderlust88

Wanderlust88 — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 11:35:34 -0800

GOD WTF META!

By: HyperBlue

HyperBlue — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 12:14:52 -0800

Spiderpig, Spiderpig He does whatever a Spiderpig does.

By: XMLicious

XMLicious — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 12:29:42 -0800

Aww, Ambrosia, you beat me to it! Seriously, some people may not want to view the video in her link there. But it's apropos to a discussion of pigs and rectums. (Though… what isn't, really?)

By: Cathedral

Cathedral — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 14:10:12 -0800

And where do the people that like to have sex on top of a freshly killed animal fit? And then where do the people that post that on the internet fit? And then where do I fit, making oblique references to shakethatbear? Don't blame me, I just felt it had to be said.

By: mosk

mosk — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 14:20:43 -0800

W T F ?!? Must...bleach...eyeballs...

By: Pressed Rat

Pressed Rat — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 14:40:51 -0800

Was this really necesary?

By: homunculus

homunculus — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 15:08:51 -0800

Yes.

By: Cathedral

Cathedral — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 15:21:24 -0800

Mosk, I didn't even post a link. That means you had to go out and SEARCH to abuse yourself. And I can't help thinking you're blaming me a bit.

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 16:32:11 -0800

Dude, don't say "pigfucker" in front of Jesus! But according to William S. Burroughs, Jesus *was* a pigfucker! Has he been guilty of misleading me all these years? I don't know, first Scientology, then Christianity -- that man is turning out to be downright unreliable when it comes to theological matters.

By: mosk

mosk — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 17:08:21 -0800

I didn't search, Cathedral, I just read your post and stuck an "http://www." in front of it and a ".com" at the end because, y'know, I'm stupidly susceptible to posts with oblique references. And I didn't call you out by name or anything or hold you personally responsible for the content; you are absolved of blame. My "WTF" was directed towards the content of your first two sentences, and the proof offered by the third. To which I say, again, WTF?!? Now shut up and had me that eyeball bleach ;-)

By: Ynoxas

Ynoxas — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 20:33:14 -0800

A transmural tear occurred when pressure exceeded the rectal wall compliance at a fixed point of contact. That has to be the most eloquent way I've ever heard "ripped him a new one" put.

By: Mitheral

Mitheral — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 20:41:26 -0800

dawson writes "Also, a classic Straight Dope." I knew I recognised the image on the blog post.

By: humannaire

humannaire — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 21:33:11 -0800

Mosk, I didn't even post a link. That means you had to go out and SEARCH to abuse yourself. And I can't help thinking you're blaming me a bit. posted by Cathedral at 6:21 PM on February 23 [+] [!] You are so flagged.

By: humannaire

humannaire — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 21:47:25 -0800

[I mean, you don't know [hsugh]? Please.]

By: pearlybob

pearlybob — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 08:01:17 -0800

I always wondered why Porky never wore pants. Hmmm.

By: Muttoneer

Muttoneer — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 08:06:57 -0800

I guess you could say the farmer was a back-gammon player. /archaic

By: mammary16

mammary16 — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 08:35:18 -0800

He truly was makin' bacon. (I can't believe no one has come up with that yet)

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 09:07:11 -0800

The level of self-deception and rationalisation is incredible - the woman who regularly had sex with her alsatian honestly believed that "he started it" was sufficient justification and the man who described the horse he shagged as "having a gleam in her eye" and giving him the come on. I see what you're getting at, patricio, but I'm unclear as to how this differs from the vast range of anthropomorphizing that the more common-or-garden pet lover goes in for. They appear to attribute all manner of human-like intent and emotion that a non-animal person like myself just isn't seeing. If I'm to accept their attributions as valid, why shouldn't I do the same for the zoophiles? I mean, if Porky didn't actually fancy old Dejan, surely he wouldn't have actually stuck it in him? Or are you making the argument that Dejan, as a somehow more 'evolved' human, had a special duty of care to Porky, in much the same way that a hot young female teacher does with the boys in her care, and so even though Porky might have wanted to stick it in him, Dejan was abusing his porcine trust by letting him get his end away before he was butchered and turned into sausages?

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 09:08:37 -0800

In short, patricio, you seem to be suggesting that it wasn't so much the man that was traumatized here, but the pig?

By: Sys Rq

Sys Rq — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 12:19:55 -0800

Boar n. The male of swine : when applied to the wild species the term is used without reference to sex. Bore v. To pierce or perforate and make a round hole in; to drill a hole in; to form by pircing or drilling; to force a narrow or difficult passage through.

By: Sys Rq

Sys Rq — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 12:21:34 -0800

ahem -- piercing

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 23:23:16 -0800

Oddly enough, it tastes like chicken.

By: Rancid Badger

Rancid Badger — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 23:32:08 -0800

Under West Virginia law it is ok if a man has sex with an Animal as long as it weights less that 40lbs.

By: cgc373

cgc373 — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 00:43:05 -0800

Dude, I really, really wish your username wasn't "Rancid Badger" right now.