Comments on: Are you an ArcheTYPE or a StereoTYPE?

Are you an ArcheTYPE or a StereoTYPE?

wendell — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 20:59:21 -0800

Typematching: Can Mistral find love with Papyrus? Who cares? Scroll down to find out which of these 6 stereotypical fonts is your type...
"But...but... I can't be Comic Sans!!!"

By: subaruwrx

subaruwrx — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:18:14 -0800

Im helvetica!

By: padraigin

padraigin — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:21:52 -0800

I'm totally American Typewriter, and wouldn't you know that's my default font on everything? This is totally genius. Totally!

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:29:02 -0800

COMIC SANS? FUCK YOU! Bodini or Antigua, maybe. Or Microgamma. Maybe OCR-A. And, hey, why would I need any Extensis products if I only had 6 very common fonts, anyway? And the only one of those that isn't shitty is Helvetica. Smells like a marketing-dork somewhere underestimated the target audience by a great deal. "What? Zurich? Caslon? Bembo Book Bold!? What the fuck? No one will know what that even means!" *opens Microsoft Word, looks at font list* "See, they're just making shit up. This job is about fonts or something. Better use these as examples. Now I can pay my friends in booze and thrift store clothes to act in some clips. Who needs real actors? I'll just have to tell them not to be "wooden" like my AD said, whatever that means. After supplies most of that $1000 bid is mine, all mine! Muhahaha! I'm so glad I went to DeVry!"

By: ZakDaddy

ZakDaddy — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:31:27 -0800

Comic Sans my hairy white ass. Boo! Hiss! and boy is it white, let me tell you.

By: maudlin

maudlin — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:33:18 -0800

Helvetica? Bleh. I would have accepted Gill Sans, maybe. But at least it wasn't Comic Sans. *points and laughs*

By: The Great Big Mulp

The Great Big Mulp — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:44:56 -0800

Goddammit. Comic sans.

By: louche mustachio

louche mustachio — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:51:20 -0800

Helvetica? Bullshit. I wear black dresses with tights and boots and piles of Czech glass necklaces. Working knowledge of the work of the lovely C. and R. Eames is nice but far from a prerequisite as long as you tip the bartender. All of those movies sound like they suck, and we can watch Desperate Living and Heaven and Earth Magic at my house; I have a projector. We are not listening to any of those songs, and if I want to break up with you, I will tell you in person. Most importantly, I like serifs. A lot. How on Earth do you get Comic Sans? Who deserves that, really?

By: Salmonberry

Salmonberry — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:54:20 -0800

American Typewriter Me so classy.

By: Artw

Artw — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:54:58 -0800

Helevetica* *More likely some filthy web based rip-off of Helvetica, TBH.

By: tellurian

tellurian — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:14:15 -0800

American Typewriter and Papyrus - I'm SO INTO YOU!

By: kalimac

kalimac — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:15:21 -0800

Comic Sans? FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU

By: riane

riane — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:28:27 -0800

Bah. Comic Sans can suck it.

By: sir_rubixalot

sir_rubixalot — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:30:51 -0800

Bad Pony? Yeah, Comic Sans? Thats bullshit! I want my money back. Oh yeah; great post; thanks!

By: Ambrosia Voyeur

Ambrosia Voyeur — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:57:32 -0800

This is timely - I just saw a font today that I thought, sheepishly was "me".

By: Rhaomi

Rhaomi — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:57:52 -0800

As gimmicky as that site was, I'm surprised they didn't use the appropriate typefaces when writing out the subtitles for each character. Typographic humor is not an especially deep subject, guys. If you're gonna go with it, then you can't afford to miss any opportunities. Ride that little font pony till it dies!

By: ralan

ralan — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 23:26:08 -0800

Ugh, Comic Sans also.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 23:44:03 -0800

Does Stencil mean I'm empty inside?

By: CitizenD

CitizenD — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 00:48:01 -0800

i'm so NOT an american typewriter. sheesh.

By: hjo3

hjo3 — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 03:13:46 -0800

Nthing "Comic Sans? Fuck you." I am Inkburrow.

By: Faint of Butt

Faint of Butt — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 03:29:10 -0800

Whoever designed this site does not know what Comic Sans people are like. Comic Sans people think they're cheerful, whimsical and quirky. They smile a lot, and forward you inspirational E-mails. They wear brightly colored novelty sweaters, preferably incorporating light bulbs and sound chips, from Thanksgiving to New Year's. Inside, they are utterly hollow and unfulfilled. They envy the rest of us and wish to drag us down to their level, but their imaginations are so stunted that their attacks rarely rise above the level of passive-aggressive memos taped above the coffee maker. True fact: Over 99.3% of all Avon sales representatives are Comic Sans people. I strongly suspect that the creator of this site is, in fact, a Comic Sans person. Me? Times New Roman through and through.

By: hal9k

hal9k — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 03:52:31 -0800

Astonished, the agent asked "What do you call your act?" The Ultra Bodonis!

By: Hogshead

Hogshead — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 04:20:15 -0800

It claims I'm Comic Sans but I am in fact Caslon. Perhaps when I said, "Serifs up!" it misheard me.

By: theredpen

theredpen — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 05:05:27 -0800

As the Achewood cartoon says, "What are you running from? The disease is inside of you!"

By: brevator

brevator — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 05:06:07 -0800

God how I hate papyrus.

By: dabitch

dabitch — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 05:47:30 -0800

Stencil. I died a little inside.

By: GrammarMoses

GrammarMoses — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 05:51:11 -0800

More like typecasting, amirite? Helvetica, it says. I would have thought *at least* Times New Roman. (I like serifs.)

By: caution live frogs

caution live frogs — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:04:48 -0800

Looks like it defaults to Comic Sans when your answer to every question is "None of the above, you idiot, please give me an option that is remotely grounded in reality for fuck's sake" and then you randomly click what looks like the least stupid answer actually on the list. I mean, what the hell? There are no options for actual people on those lists.

By: mary8nne

mary8nne — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:17:24 -0800

that was really shit

By: sixswitch

sixswitch — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:43:46 -0800

I am secure in my typographic identity and do not need a web app to help me define it. I was born Garamond—that's right, the big G—and so help me god as a Garamond will I spend the rest of my days. I know it might sound weird, but there's just something so sexy about low x-height relative to caps...excuse while I go have a typegasm. That's it, em dash...right there...

By: Katemonkey

Katemonkey — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:51:20 -0800

Oh fuck, I'm Comic Sans. I will go kill myself now.

By: GuyZero

GuyZero — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 07:03:52 -0800

I think it makes everyone comic sans apparently, just to fuck with us. But yeah, if you take a bit of everything, you're comic sans.

By: IronLizard

IronLizard — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 07:16:42 -0800

Apparently it's the default if you don't conform well to a particular stereotype.

By: ntartifex

ntartifex — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 07:38:54 -0800

Helvetica? Meh. I see myself more as Gentium. Elegant, quirky, leaning towards dead languages and theology, and offering full IPA support.

By: cortex

cortex — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 07:55:18 -0800

COMIC SANS? FUCK YOU! Comic Sans my hairy white ass. Boo! Hiss! Goddammit. Comic sans. How on Earth do you get Comic Sans? Who deserves that, really? Bah. Comic Sans can suck it. Yeah, Comic Sans? Thats bullshit! I want my money back. I kinda hate to have to tell you this to all of you...

By: porn in the woods

porn in the woods — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 09:21:06 -0800

Helvetica? No way, I'm full-blooded Futura.

By: batmonkey

batmonkey — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 09:59:20 -0800

I hatehatehatehate "quizzes" with questions that are based solely upon how misanthropic and clever the composer imagines himself to be. It just irritates me for no good reason - why can't there be answers that normal, functioning, varied interest adults would choose? This did remind me that I'd rather like a font directory wherein I can select what I need it for and get a list of fonts from "you probably already have this but designers frown upon it" to "everyone will know you really put some thought into is, hurrah!". Wouldn't that rock?

By: misanthropicsarah

misanthropicsarah — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 10:31:18 -0800

comic sans. :(

By: athenian

athenian — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 10:47:09 -0800

Helvetica, they say. Of course, I'm really Helvetica Neue.

By: dabitch

dabitch — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 11:13:44 -0800

I wish I could doubletriple favorite things.

By: condour75

condour75 — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 15:18:05 -0800

If I'm comic sans, can I at least be a self-hating comic sans?

By: dosterm

dosterm — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 15:20:23 -0800

I wish to dress in a style unlike any of those options. I wish to meet none of those people in a bar. I wish to see none of those films on a date. I suppose I like Air and Thievery Corporation enough. But I most certainly would not end a relationship in any of those ways. I am Wingdings, forever seeking the Zapf Dingbats of my dreams.

By: dosterm

dosterm — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 15:22:21 -0800

And seriously, fuck Comic Sans.

By: Skwirl

Skwirl — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 15:27:23 -0800

I'm totally crushing on Papyrus. I think I will use Papyrus on all my resumes and cover letters in 19 point type in order to attract her into my life.

By: jkidwell

jkidwell — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 10:52:16 -0800

You know, the typematching technology is incredibly scientific. We use only the most advanced squirrels and chipmunks to decipher your type quiz and let you know your type. With each question you answer, a nut is dropped into their cages. Upon completion of the quiz we read the patterns in their droppings and only then decipher your perfect type match. It's all about the science, you know. (SPCA notice - no animals were harmed during the creation of this site.)

By: cortex

cortex — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 10:55:15 -0800

Heh. Hiya, Jim.

By: tellurian

tellurian — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 15:13:36 -0800

We use only the most advanced squirrels and chipmunks... With each question you answer, a nut is dropped into their cages. Upon completion of the quiz we read the patterns in their droppings and only then decipher your perfect type match. Tufty, Alvin, Simon and Theodore divine the dropping of nuts?

By: misha

misha — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 16:08:28 -0800

Why, when I picked so many choices with European twists to them, did I get American Typewriter? I actually like trebuchet and papyrus. Bah.