Comments on: Stuff nobody likes: blogs about stuff people like

Stuff nobody likes: blogs about stuff people like

ThePinkSuperhero — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:07:36 -0800

A short list is provided for your convenience. [via mefi projects]

By: bookish

bookish — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:11:07 -0800

Necco wafers.

By: grubi

grubi — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:11:39 -0800

I'll be damned. I hate everything on that list.

By: Mr_Zero

Mr_Zero — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:21:22 -0800

Good list, but I am surprised anal warts did not make it.

By: HuronBob

HuronBob — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:22:16 -0800

I actually added that list to my list of stuff I don't like. There's something very meta/zen about doing that...I feel better.

By: fearfulsymmetry

fearfulsymmetry — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:22:21 -0800

I've always wanted to do jury service (though from I've heard it's far less of a bureaucratic nightmare in the UK and there's a big opportunity to ker-ching! it on the expenses). And I quite like rum and raisin.

By: ThePinkSuperhero

ThePinkSuperhero — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:23:51 -0800

I've always wanted to do jury duty, too, although it would be nice to be able to schedule for a time that is convenient. And I personally like getting a receipt with everything as well, even a pack of gum or a bottle of water.

By: bitter-girl.com

bitter-girl.com — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:25:01 -0800

Stuff nobody likes #101: people who use the same blog template and writing style as a blogger who just got $350K for his stuff white people like blog.

By: DU

DU — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:26:11 -0800

StuffPeopleLove.com Entry #1: Being reminded of stuff they hate. Really working up a big thing over it. Love. It.

By: Kattullus

Kattullus — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:27:29 -0800

Napoleon liked body odor and James Joyce liked other people's farts. This doesn't have anything to do with anything, I just like to mention these facts every now and again.

By: slimepuppy

slimepuppy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:32:04 -0800

I... I like rum raisin...

By: leibniz

leibniz — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:39:46 -0800

thirding the liking of rum n' raisin... should we form some kind of support group?

By: MythMaker

MythMaker — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:40:57 -0800

I love rum raisin ice cream. I'm with HuronBob - I don't like this list.

By: weapons-grade pandemonium

weapons-grade pandemonium — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:42:32 -0800

The unexpected pit bull in the parked 4x4 with open side window and blackened rear window loses top spot by a slim margin to said pit bull's owner, who tells you not to walk close to vehicles in parking lots.

By: not_on_display

not_on_display — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:43:26 -0800

"So, if you want me (or anyone else) to respond to your profile in a way that doesn’t sound awkward and brain-damaged, please write something that’s at least quasi-original." Whew. Bullet dodged.

By: drezdn

drezdn — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:44:10 -0800

The list is pretty accurate.

By: skyper

skyper — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:44:55 -0800

And I'll pick up USA Today if I'm at the airport; I don't exactly run *screaming* from it...

By: jquinby

jquinby — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:48:23 -0800

I hate trying again later, which is what the website is telling me to do right now.

By: 1

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:49:46 -0800

This is more like "stuff white people don't like."

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:52:30 -0800

Someone should add 'overloaded webservers' to that list.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:55:04 -0800

Wow, is thing ever spot on, I hate 503 pages!

By: quin

quin — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:55:31 -0800

You know who else didn't like stuff? That's right... Despotic Little League Managers. Those guys are fuckers. #7. Driving Into the Sun Which to be fair, isn't nearly as bad as Crashing Into the Sun.

By: straight

straight — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:58:23 -0800

Lots of little kids like Valentine's day. It's the biggest chocolate haul between Christmas and Easter. Also, little cards with pictures of puppies.

By: stupidsexyFlanders

stupidsexyFlanders — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:59:30 -0800

Re: the banner. Throwing TV dinners and Hitler in the same bucket...that's a pretty damn big bucket.

By: iconomy

iconomy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:02:43 -0800

It's kind of hard to believe that the word retarded hasn't been used to describe anything yet. I have to agree with the Trix thing. I have always so wanted to kick their asses.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:07:23 -0800

I really wanted to like that, because I recognize a couple of contributor's names as MeFites I have a fairly high opinion of, but - honestly, guys, a lot of those were a little petty and mean-spirited. Besides, you left out the "patriotic" subset of e-mail forwards, which is the worst kind of all.

By: robocop is bleeding

robocop is bleeding — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:14:33 -0800

Neat! I want to add the following to that list: - Dr. Sanjay Gupta - Infotainment - The fact that 'infotainment' is okay with Firefox's spellcheck, but 'okay' and 'spellcheck' are not. - Constipation - Gypsypunk

By: faceonmars

faceonmars — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:16:34 -0800

I've done jury duty. Twice. I enjoyed it both times. It helps that my employer pays for jury duty and I had fairly interesting cases both times.

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:19:18 -0800

God damn I hate the G train.

By: soundofsuburbia

soundofsuburbia — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:32:52 -0800

I'd add "paper jams" to that list. Hating on paper jams is pure comic gold, and you get to include an "Office Space" quote. Maybe, some people love paper jams, I don't know. Maybe they can turn into an excuse? "Sorry boss, the printer returned a 'PAPER WRAPPED AROUND FUSER' error, can't work right now." Still, I hate paper jams.

By: Space Coyote

Space Coyote — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:33:37 -0800

Boring, predictable blogrant style writing.

By: jquinby

jquinby — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:35:34 -0800

Is it too late for a meta-list of all Blogs People Like? A steady-running Things People Hate/Like in Review? There could be a little ticker or meter, which could be shunted into an RSS feed, and thence to a Yahoo widget.

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:36:58 -0800

Hey, I work with one of those contributors! I don't like him. Nobody does.

By: fixedgear

fixedgear — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:40:51 -0800

Cash-only restaurants rule. BYOBs are cool, too. This list, not so much.

By: game warden to the events rhino

game warden to the events rhino — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:50:19 -0800

I don't like anything at all. Do I win?

By: Ella Fynoe

Ella Fynoe — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:17:53 -0800

Necco wafers rock. Unless you happen to be sleeping in a building right near the factory, and they are making the "chocomint" flavor first thing in the morning. Trust me.

By: JaredSeth

JaredSeth — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:29:35 -0800

Online Dating Profiles Written By People Who’ve Obviously Never Read Anyone Else’s Online Dating Profile Better those than the ones written by people who have read others dating profiles. "I like movies, music and long walks on the beach. Friends tell me I look like Brad Pitt, only better looking."

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:30:48 -0800

Nobody doesn't like dustindiamond.com.

By: Oriole Adams

Oriole Adams — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:31:08 -0800

I would've added Necco wafers, too, as well as Circus Peanuts, except that I know at least one person who likes them: my dad, who apparently has never met a candy he doesn't like. At least he came in handy when it was time to purge our trick-or-treat bags.

By: Navelgazer

Navelgazer — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:40:03 -0800

Well maybe I don't like any of y'all, either! Y'all wanna be next on the list?! Huh?! Do ya?! ...I love you guys...

By: pixelmech

pixelmech — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:45:51 -0800

It's official, there is now a website for everything.

By: pineapple

pineapple — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:51:06 -0800

robocop is bleeding said: "Neat! I want to add the following to that list: Dr. Sanjay Gupta" I think Dr. Gupta is very handsome and I find his McMedicine approach to be comforting -- in that I assume that the masses probably benefit from it, which allows me to feel both smugly superior, and wildly grateful for my internet access and health insurance. I'm aware that I've just admitted a complex relationship with a television celebrity doctor that I've never met. Things that apparently other people hate that I also like: brown Necco Wafers, BYOBs. And I secretly yearn to get called for jury duty, and am sad when I hear people complain about it or arrange to ditch it, because I feel that it demonstrates the Continuing Crisis. Also, Dear Omniscient Internet Entity Amassing Scary Amounts of Information About Us In Order to Profile Us as Consumers, Social Contributors, and Possible Criminals: I realize that this comment validates some pre-determined algorithm signifying the end of days, and I acknowledge my responsibility. Please spare my family. TIA.

By: edverb

edverb — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:57:01 -0800

1) Drivers who tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever, causing everyone behind them to tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever. 2) Being stuck in a long line is bad. Sure. But being stuck in a long line with whiners who complain to everyone in earshot about how long the line is even worse. 3) Screaming kids are bad, but they have an excuse. Screaming neighbors are worse, Especially the ones who beat their girlfriends. Said girlfriends then come running to your place for shelter and first aid as their psycho boyfriend pounds on your door, demanding to be let in. You wait him out, and when he leaves, you call a locksmith and escort your tiny, frightened, bloodied neighbor back to her house and stand guard with a crowbar while her locks are changed. You go to bed around 4AM, when the adrenaline finally wears off. Not two weeks later, she takes him back, gives him the new key, and he's your neighbor again. Doncha just hate it when that happens? Yeah, me too.

By: R. Mutt

R. Mutt — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:03:31 -0800

#15. The “Grocer’s Apostrophe” I once spotted the "Grocer's Apostrophe" on the sign for a tattoo parlor in Brooklyn. I forget the actual name, but the sign said something like .... ______ TATTOO'S Also, in the window was a FOR RENT sign. For some reason the tattoo shop had gone out of business.

By: solipsophistocracy

solipsophistocracy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:05:46 -0800

When I read #7. Driving Into the Sun on the short list, I thought it meant literally driving into the sun, and I thought to myself: Surely we can't be certain that no one likes that? Then I realized that it was only a metaphorical viking.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:05:48 -0800

All these things are disqualified by the fact that without them people would have no reason to bitch and/or feel superior.

By: quin

quin — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:08:42 -0800

1) Drivers who tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever, causing everyone behind them to tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever I've been compiling a list. It's pretty extensive at this point, but when the revolution comes and we stick these fuckers up against the wall, I'm going to line them up in such a way that when I shoot the first one, he falls back onto the second person in line, then I'm going to scream "You see how that works? You see how one person in the beginning can affect everyone behind them?! If you had learned that sooner, you wouldn't be here!" Not that I have any bitterness about this, or anything.

By: the littlest brussels sprout

the littlest brussels sprout — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:15:52 -0800

People. If you like an item on the list of "Stuff Nobody Likes," you're clearly a nobody. But don't worry. All you nobodies can be friends and eat rum raisin ice cream together at Dustin Diamond's house on Valentine's Day.

By: nebulawindphone

nebulawindphone — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:16:02 -0800

Then I realized that it was only a metaphorical viking. Sorry. We'll be sure to vike you for real next time.

By: ThePinkSuperhero

ThePinkSuperhero — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:22:14 -0800

It's pretty extensive at this point, but when the revolution comes and we stick these fuckers up against the wall, I'm going to line them up in such a way that when I shoot the first one, he falls back onto the second person in line, then I'm going to scream "You see how that works? You see how one person in the beginning can affect everyone behind them?! If you had learned that sooner, you wouldn't be here!" That's backwards. You need to shoot the last person in line first and let the people fall forward, so the original brake tapper has the weight of a trillion dead bodies on top of him. Then, THEN, you can yell at him.

By: jeffamaphone

jeffamaphone — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:40:44 -0800

Heh. I hate it when the Internet is wrong about stuff I like. To all you haters: this site is just a bunch of guys who got bored and started talking about how silly the "stuff * people like" sites are and decided this might be a way to subvert them and make fun of them, or at least something to pass the time. I suspect beer and/or other substances may have been involved. So just, like, relax and take it for what it is.

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:42:39 -0800

meh, I'm one of the contributors, and I'd say snark away. I mean, it would be pretty hypocritical for me to come out against snark, as a contributor to a blog called "Stuff Nobody Likes."

By: Navelgazer

Navelgazer — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:47:55 -0800

jeffamaphone is pretty close in his assessment, actually, except that it all happened over a gmail thread.

By: krinklyfig

krinklyfig — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:53:49 -0800

edverb writes "1) Drivers who tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever, causing everyone behind them to tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever." What should top that is tailgaters, which is one thing that can cause me to tap on my breaks, just to make sure the tailgater is aware of why it's not a good thing to snuggle up to my bumper.

By: everichon

everichon — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:13:48 -0800

I like many of the Necco wafers except the chocolate ones. The chocolate ones are no damn good.

By: Popular Ethics

Popular Ethics — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:15:23 -0800

1) Drivers who tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever, causing everyone behind them to tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever Except to piss off the tailgater who never learned the two-second-space rule in Driver's ed. On Preview: what krinklyfig said.

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:19:36 -0800

By: kittens for breakfast

kittens for breakfast — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:29:24 -0800

I once spotted the "Grocer's Apostrophe" on the sign for a tattoo parlor in Brooklyn. I forget the actual name, but the sign said something like .... ______ TATTOO'S Grammatically correct, perhaps, but only if it were owned by this guy.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:45:09 -0800

I agree with pretty much all of the choices, other than the G train. If there's something that annoys New Yorkers that much, it's all right with me.

By: justgary

justgary — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:48:42 -0800

To all you haters: this site is just a bunch of guys who got bored and started talking about how silly the "stuff * people like" sites are and decided this might be a way to subvert them and make fun of them, or at least something to pass the time. I suspect beer and/or other substances may have been involved. So just, like, relax and take it for what it is. posted by jeffamaphone I remember a time when you could give a negative opinion and not be labeled a hater. I blame mtv. I can appreciate that it was nothing serious, just a couple of guys goofing off, and, honestly it comes off that way. So mission accomplished. But don't put it out there if you're not ready for differing opinions. The comments have been pretty mild for something that's basically a ripoff of a ripoff. I suspect they would have been much harsher if the authors had not been mefi members. So just, like, relax and take it for what it is.

By: edverb

edverb — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 12:54:43 -0800

What should top that is tailgaters, which is one thing that can cause me to tap on my breaks, just to make sure the tailgater is aware of why it's not a good thing to snuggle up to my bumper. Yep...while I'm cruising way back, regulating the distance between my car and the one ahead of me by keeping my foot off the accelerator...you guys are up ahead, alternately tailgating and braking on each other. All I see from my ten to fifteen car lengths back are your red brake lights and his. Occasionally you're forcing me to brake too, no matter how much room I give to the impatient and/or petty drivers up ahead, like yourselves. And because you're not the only shortsighted fools playing this petty little game on the roads, the rest of us get stuck in a traffic jam caused not by lane closure, or accident, or even traffic volume -- but by spite. Your spite, and their impatience. Once in a while, the two of you will crash into each other, delaying yourselves and everyone behind you even more, and ruining your cars and your days in the process. To which I say, thanks a lot. This is why we can't have nice things. Don't take it personally that I hate you both. It's nothing personal, krinklyfig, strictly policy. At times I am tempted to believe that the entire system of two dimensional, point-to-point linear automobile traffic is a senseless, productivity-killing plot designed to do nothing more than to sell gasoline, but that's a post for another day. Usually I entertain these macro-thoughts so I don't dwell on the imbeciles in front of me.

By: SPrintF

SPrintF — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:00:23 -0800

I am quietly pleased, and surprised, to not find myself on this list. Maybe I should work on my dating profile! (I love to laugh. Hard! At my family and friends!)

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:01:27 -0800

Also, I like the suggestions in this thread - especially the Necco wafers and the taillight thing. If any of you would like to contribute, feel free to send me a MeFi mail.

By: krinklyfig

krinklyfig — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:07:30 -0800

edverb writes "Occasionally you're forcing me to brake too, no matter how much room I give to the impatient and/or petty drivers up ahead, like yourselves." Hey, if I have to slam on my breaks for an emergency, the tailgater will find out how much of a problem it is. And so will you. The tailgater's insurance company will be footing the bill. If I'm going 50 and you're less than one car length behind me, I'm not going to make it easy for you to keep riding my ass. It's not a game. It's called keeping the guy behind me at a safe distance.

By: edverb

edverb — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:27:45 -0800

It's not a game. It's called keeping the guy behind me at a safe distance. Krinklyfig, that's why "keep right, pass left" laws exist. If someone is riding your ass, the best outcome for you and the people behind you is to change lanes and let the driver pass you. Instead of tapping your brakes, why not move over? I hope you're not that person driving in the passing lane, and, upon someone approaching from behind, becomes stubborn and insists on holding their ground, and tapping their brakes. Because that person is an asshole. Every bit as much the asshole as the tailgater. Neither of them own the road. Both act as if they do.

By: blucevalo

blucevalo — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:42:33 -0800

No list of this kind is complete without post office/DMV lines.

By: lunit

lunit — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 13:54:07 -0800

Waiting for the bathroom. It sucks.

By: amyms

amyms — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:01:09 -0800

The site reminds me of the "Friends" episode (yes, I am a fan of "Friends," what are you looking at?) where Mr. Heckles, the cranky upstairs neighbor, dies and the Friends find his Book of Grievances. I've always wanted to keep a Book of Grievances, but it's too exhausting writing everything down.

By: A-Train

A-Train — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:02:14 -0800

Well, if none of them would be missed, you can make a little list.

By: loquacious

loquacious — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:03:09 -0800

I know why those east coast/NYC bodegas put coffee in paper bags. It's because you all live in hell, and you obviously did something to deserve it. Something very bad. This is why you get shitty, scorching hot coffee in little styrofoam thimbles in soggy paper bags, with a straw. With a fucking straw! This is why you get the G train, and New Yorker magazine. This is why you get Donald Trump, and so many of the bad things on that list. What did you do, sinner? Oh, what did you do!? It must have been terrible.

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:08:18 -0800

This is why you get the G train, and New Yorker magazine. Nothing wrong with the New Yorker. New York Magazine, however, is a different matter entirely.

By: Samizdata

Samizdata — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:32:58 -0800

You know what I don't like? People who think they know what I don't like. Oh. And diverticulosis. That sucks too.

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 14:39:42 -0800

Please add to the list: "Walking through a spider's web."

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:17:32 -0800

"Walking through a spider's web." That does kinda suck, but from a distance it looks like you're having a desperate karate fight with an invisible person, which might at least amuse someone.

By: krinklyfig

krinklyfig — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:43:48 -0800

edverb writes "Krinklyfig, that's why 'keep right, pass left' laws exist. If someone is riding your ass, the best outcome for you and the people behind you is to change lanes and let the driver pass you. Instead of tapping your brakes, why not move over? " You don't live here in Taos, where most of the major roads have one lane each direction, including the (55mph) highway I take on my daily commute. There is passing on some sections, into the other oncoming lane, but during commute times it's almost impossible to find an opening.

By: davros42

davros42 — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:55:25 -0800

They lost me when they claimed Necco waifers were English... New England is not the same thing as England, guys.

By: Devils Slide

Devils Slide — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:12:47 -0800

Getting A Receipt For Every Goddamn Thing That You Buy The late Mitch Hedberg had a funny bit on this subject. I'm parpaphrasing, but it went something like this: "I bought a donut, and the cashier gave me a receipt. I just don't see a scenario in which I have to prove I bought a donut. I give you the money, and you give me the donut. End of transaction. We do not need to bring pen and paper into this."

By: Devils Slide

Devils Slide — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:13:32 -0800

Grrr paraphrasing.

By: Zinger

Zinger — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:15:33 -0800

#32. Online Dating Profiles Written By People Who’ve Obviously Never Read Anyone Else’s Online Dating Profile Well, I agree with his list here. One phrase I came to loathe: "I just want to live life to the fullest." Gastronomically, though, the English aren’t all that impressive. However, oh come on... picking on English food is so cliche and it's just plain wrong. Roast lamb and yorkshire puddings? Double chocolate stout? A cream tea? A Balti curry? What's not to like? Is there cheap, crappy confectionery? Uh yeah. Is that exclusive to England. Uh no.

By: liquorice

liquorice — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:28:32 -0800

1) Drivers who tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever, causing everyone behind them to tap their brakes for no reason what-so-fucking-ever. Yes! You have no idea how much angst this causes me! Unnecessary fucking braking! I must exclaim some more!

By: wendell

wendell — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:54:22 -0800

I HATE GENERALIZATIONS. ALL GENERALIZATIONS. EXCEPT THIS ONE. And I liked jury duty. Especially the one time I did it while working for a company which compensated me for it. I got an eight workday break from my usual routine and was dropped into the middle of a real-life murder case that was more dramatic than the average "Law & Order" episode (except that it didn't make headlines in L.A. where there are too many murders for all of them to make headlines, so it would never be 'ripped from the headlines'). I learned a lot during that case about misplaced loyalty, keeping the courage of your convictions (from another juror who made me feel a little ashamed of myself) and the fundamental and fatal (sometimes literally) flaws in the American so-called-Justice System. It was, essentially, an opportunity to pick up valuable life experience from other people you otherwise might never meet (of course, with criminal defendants, it's mostly what NOT to do, but also the parties of the court and the other jurors). I recommend it to anyone. SERIOUSLY.

By: edverb

edverb — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:58:45 -0800

You don't live here in Taos, where most of the major roads have one lane each direction, including the (55mph) highway I take on my daily commute. There is passing on some sections, into the other oncoming lane, but during commute times it's almost impossible to find an opening. Fair enough.

By: Kattullus

Kattullus — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:04:15 -0800

re: unnecessary breaking When I was young and reckless I would amuse myself, when stopped at lights with a long line of cars behind me, by moving my car a few centimeters forward and then watch the entire line of cars behind me also move a few centimeters forward. O callousness of youth! How I laughed! LAUGHED I tell you. I was a lonely, friendless teenager

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:04:36 -0800

You have no idea how much angst this causes me! Yes I do. 3.2 angst. Kee-rist, I hate it when people assume I have no idea about things that I'm actually quite well informed about.

By: drezdn

drezdn — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:25:26 -0800

For tail-gating, I utilize a device called the reverse cow catcher. It looks like a cow catcher, but it attaches to a solenoid on the back of the car. If a car comes within one car length of my car, I activate the device and it "gently" pushes the other car back. If that doesn't work, I press the oil slick button, but then sometimes I cause my own repair truck to spin out, and that's never good.

By: Dizzy

Dizzy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:32:43 -0800

I like Circus Peanuts and I don't care who knows it.

By: Samizdata

Samizdata — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:49:52 -0800

ROU_Xenophobe: Yes I do. 3.2 angstroms. There. Fixed that for you.

By: Samizdata

Samizdata — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 17:53:17 -0800

Plus, not only do I occasionally eat Circus Peanuts and Necco Wafers (sweet tooth declining as I age ungracefully), but also those nifty little spots of candy on the wax paper...

By: George_Spiggott

George_Spiggott — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 18:54:20 -0800

Instead of tapping your brakes, why not move over? First of all, you're assuming that this is happening when there's a lane to the right. It happens under every circumstance. Second, no, I'm not going to change into the right lane for you just so you can then tailgate the guy in front of me, you're not a damn ambulance.

By: newdaddy

newdaddy — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 19:04:02 -0800

See, I think some of you guys are missing the point. It's fun to haggle over what's on the list, and what's not on the list, and What James Joyce Liked to Smell and whatever, but the writing about the individual items on the list, my humble opinion, is pretty damn funny. I about busted some of my respiratory equipment trying to read out loud the entry on Necco Wafers, I was laughing so hard. And the surrealist manifesto thingy. Best laugh I had all day -

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 19:15:43 -0800

Yes I do. 3.2 angstroms. There. Fixed that for you. Naw, they can be changed again and again, so they'd be angstrams.

By: louche mustachio

louche mustachio — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 19:20:35 -0800

People chewing with their mouths open, smacking their lips, and talking with their mouths full. *shudder*

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 23:08:25 -0800

but also those nifty little spots of candy on the wax paper... Oh my god. How can you possibly eat those things? I remember my parents used to give those to us as kids, and they were awful! What a terrible idea for a candy. You always got some of the paper still stuck to the candy. Who the hell wants to eat paper? But that's nothing compared to the worst candy of all time - tootsie rolls. My god, what an awful disappointment. They purported to be chocolate, yet they looked like turds and tasted like wet socks. Yuck! And then they'd try to disguise the tootsie roll in a lollipop, so you're thinking, "mmmm, lollipop," but then you get to the center and you're hit with the tootsie turd. Yuck! And while they're not the worst possible candy, I think we need to give an honorable mention to kinder eggs. Gee, what could possibly be better than chocolate covered plastic? And to make matters better, they're filled with tiny chokeable pieces of plastic. It's like they want us to die or something. No, kids, not all candies are rewards. Some are just punishment.

By: pompomtom

pompomtom — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 00:26:51 -0800

>Roast lamb and yorkshire puddings? You are joking, right?

By: loiseau

loiseau — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 00:49:56 -0800

What is the deal with airplane peanuts?

By: liquorice

liquorice — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 04:24:56 -0800

Yes I do. 3.2 angst. Kee-rist, I hate it when people assume I have no idea about things that I'm actually quite well informed about. More like 6.4. Sorry, dear, you have may have an idea about the thing but you have no idea about me.

By: Kattullus

Kattullus — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 06:21:26 -0800

First they came for the circus peanuts but I did not speak up for I did not like circus peanuts. Then they came for the necco wafers and I again I remained silent because I had no idea what necco wafers are. And finally they came for the kinder eggs and when I tried to speak up I realized I was choking on little plastic airplane. getting a kinder egg was such a thrill when I was a kid... chocolate and a toy! what can be better

By: pineapple

pineapple — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 06:26:13 -0800

Classic, Kattullus. I also view the Kinder Egg as "candy + toy = wheee!" instead of "choking hazard."

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 08:49:00 -0800

I dunno, maybe I'm being overly critical of kinder eggs. I guess I had a bad first experience with them. I didn't know what to expect, so I just bit into it, thinking that it was like a Cadbury egg. But instead of finding delicious buttercream in the middle, I find.... a plastic shell. At that point, I was so pissed off and disappointed that I didn't even bother with the little plastic bits that were inside. I felt like I had totally been bunked.

By: Dizzy

Dizzy — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 09:24:58 -0800

A Circus Peanut will never break your heart.

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 19:29:31 -0800

* Cancer * Getting Arrested * Accidental Amputation Circus Peanuts = delicious processed marshmallow

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 09:16:21 -0800

Instead of tapping your brakes, why not move over? First of all, you're assuming that this is happening when there's a lane to the right. It happens under every circumstance. Second, no, I'm not going to change into the right lane for you just so you can then tailgate the guy in front of me, you're not a damn ambulance. I think there's a disconnect here. ... We have some people against tailgaters vs. some people against drivers who unnecessarily activate their brake lights. Those are two totally different drivers. Sometimes the tailgaters are also the ones who hits their brakes too much because they're driving too fast or not paying attention. The people against drivers who unnecessarily activate their brake lights are probably urban/suburban commuters who are used to traveling in high traffic at 40-60 mph during rush hour. The more people tap their brakes unnecessarily, the lower the traveling speed for everyone behind them. It adds up. It's apparent whenever I drive east on the SF-Oakland Bay Bridge. Drivers don't know or pay attention to the downhill part at the end, so they have to use their brakes because they end up going too fast -> drivers behind them react and also active brake lights -> much slower traffic than possible at the start of the bridge. Is it a big deal? Probably not. What's big? Instinctively, I agree with those who hate the brakers, but when I think harder about it I wonder why. Time is money/invaluable? After more consideration I must side with the drivers who tap their brakes. Slow down. Feel the road rage gushing through your body and channel it into song or prayer.