“Fear not the terrorist, because the United States has a Department of Homeland Security. It's looking out for us all. This month the massive bureaucracy announced $844 million in spending for the latest ‘Infrastructure Protection Activities.’
With news like this, Osama bin Laden must feel helpless. He's probably holed up in a cave, meeting with advisors and junior terrorists about the obstacles presented by ‘Infrastructure Protection Activities.’ We can hear them now: ‘Just how does one destroy a casino bus that's equipped with GPS? Curses, foiled again by Infrastructure Protection Activities.’
Some of the Infrastructure Protection Activities money made its way right here to Colorado Springs, and into the pocket of the private owner of Ramblin Express, a casino bus service. To date, the for-profit business has received $382,000 in anti-terrorism grants. This year's $184,415 gift to Ramblin Express came from an $11.2 million pork fund called the Intercity Bus Security Grant Program - a division of Infrastructure Protection Activities - which sends gifts to scores of businesses like Ramblin Express.
The money purportedly helps companies improve vehicle security. Ramblin Express owner Todd Holland, contacted by The Gazette, said he was too busy at the time to discuss how the money would make his company's drivers and passengers safe from bin Laden, al-Qaida and the like. It's hard to imagine how anyone could argue that $382,000 to a private shuttle business might have any effect on thwarting terrorism.”
Many would assume the men are tourists taking in the city's sights, but law enforcement officials say they could be terrorists staking out possible targets.And the "many" people would almost certainly be right. I mean... LEOs would be right, too in that those photographers could be terrorists... but so could that guy over there eating ice cream... or that lady talking on her cell phone... or that cab driver... or... or... um... or that cop over there...
The meeting, held at Cordova's First Assembly of God Church..."We've found that religious people have the most credulous nature."
"You may think a guy is just shooting pictures, but if you report it to us, we'll send it on to the FBI..."Because nothing says "efficiency" like implementing a middleman. I mean... this is *important* stuff! This could potentially be a terrorist! So what we really want to do is *slow* the reporting system and investigation process down.
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posted by ornate insect at 5:29 PM on May 29, 2008 [1 favorite]