Comments on: An Unforgivable Name

An Unforgivable Name

Ms. Saint — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:40:11 -0800

"'Uncle Adolf' referred to William Patrick as 'my loathsome nephew'." Willy Hitler, the son of Adolf Hitler's half-brother Alois Hitler, Jr., is one member of Hitler's extended family, although he wasn't easy to track down. After WWII, he changed his name and tried to live a private, secret life in the United States. Now, his three sons, relatives of Hitler living normal, regular American lives, have decided to never marry and let their family line die with them.

More information about Willy Hitler and his family can be found in The Last of the Hitlers, by David Gardner (the reporter who tracked down the Hitler family), and these PDF files, from the FBI.

By: monospace

monospace — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:50:29 -0800

I just don't like the Hitlers. Never have, never will.

By: wabashbdw

wabashbdw — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:52:33 -0800

I guess we know where they stand on the nurture/nature debate.

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:57:59 -0800

You know who else.... oh, wait. Never mind.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:58:01 -0800

From reading the FBI files, he seems like a good guy dealt a bad hand by the simple misfortune of a last name, who tried to "make up" for it by signing up to fight for the UK, US, and Canada during WW II. Poor guy. I wish him and his family peace.

By: etaoin

etaoin — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:59:44 -0800

Yes, well, good guy except for the blackmail.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:01:25 -0800

...had decided in a remarkable pact not to have children themselves in order that Adolf Hitler's genes would die with them. I'm not a particularly big fan of children, myself. But I find this incredibly sad. That they would feel the need to make a decision which will affect the rest of their lives based on their relation to someone they likely never even met.

By: Jofus

Jofus — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:02:04 -0800

Hitler, now zere was a painter.

By: wfrgms

wfrgms — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:03:09 -0800

Oh like it even matters.

By: sdodd

sdodd — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:03:17 -0800

Wow. You think it sucks to have that awkward sex talk with your kids? This poor guy's got it rough: "So, boys, the good news is that your great uncle is world famous; the bad news... Well, get comfortable. The bad news is going to take awhile."

By: mazola

mazola — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:03:22 -0800

I'm going to forward this post to Bush.

By: bondcliff

bondcliff — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:08:08 -0800

"...and I don't want you hanging around that Hitler kid."

By: kittens for breakfast

kittens for breakfast — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:10:40 -0800

Hitler, now zere was a painter . (In all seriousness, a friend of mine who works in a framing shop some years ago received an assignment to mount and frame a pencil sketch of a nature scene that was believed to be the work of Hitler. The sketch itself was pleasant and unremarkable. But it did kind of give me chills to look at it. My friend said the framing and mounting was pretty strange for him...because of its historical value, he was afraid he might damage it somehow, and just touching it made him very uncomfortable, due to the obvious associations.)

By: dgaicun

dgaicun — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:17:19 -0800

...tells the story of the brothers, and their bizarre pact with each other never to have children in order to sever the bloodline of their infamous relative. Yeah, because nothing fights Nazi ideology more than the belief that there are evil bloodlines that must be expunged.

By: WalterMitty

WalterMitty — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:19:38 -0800

I'm going to forward this post to Bush. And his daughters! And his brother as well, don't forget - they're running around marrying and giving birth and carrying on like they intend to pass on those genes.

By: gimonca

gimonca — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:19:41 -0800

I guess that's the final solution to that problem.

By: rokusan

rokusan — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:24:20 -0800

have decided to never marry... I think this guys are mixed up about babies and storks and stuff. I don't see what marriage has to do with anything here. Snip, snip, snip maybe. Marriage?

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:26:51 -0800

From the last link, it's also mentioned that the brothers won't be marrying either. I agree with quin, this is truly sad. Talk about sins of the ~~father~~ great-uncle. In another case, it looks like sometimes the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, as the adage goes.

By: interrobang

interrobang — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:27:38 -0800

Get used to it, Hitler.

By: BobFrapples

BobFrapples — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:28:07 -0800

I'm not a particularly big fan of children, myself. But I find this incredibly sad. That they would feel the need to make a decision which will affect the rest of their lives based on their relation to someone they likely never even met. I would hazard a guess that it's probably not about the actual bloodline, and any fear of some reincarnated Hilter 2.0 being born somewhere down the line. These guys have probably had to deal with fear and a huge burden their whole lives, and they don't want to have to pass down that to their children, who would also have to live in shame of their true last name. And yes, it is sad. I pity these poor bastards. They most likely haven't stayed single out of choice. Once you meet a nice girl, how the hell do you break it to her that you're a Hitler?? Probably easier to just not try...

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:28:37 -0800

That's the fear when you're an adopted child. One day you'll get the bug to look up your biological parents, and they'll send you the info, and you'll open the package, and be like, Hm. Dad was named Sheldon Hitler. DAD WAS NAMED SHELDON HITLER?!?

By: jouke

jouke — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:29:19 -0800

If the evilness of Adolf Hitler is related to his particular unique genetic make up and Adolf Hitlers DNA was a unique mix of both his parents DNA and these guys only inherit some part of the genes of one of Adolf Hitlers parents that means that the evilness of these guys' DNA is extremely tenuous.

By: mattbucher

mattbucher — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:29:24 -0800

He should change his name to something benign, like Gillooly or Buttafuoco.

By: tadellin

tadellin — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:34:28 -0800

You people comparing Bush to Hitler are ridiculous.

By: optovox

optovox — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:34:57 -0800

posted by mattbucher He should change his name to something benign, like Gillooly or Buttafuoco. I'd suggest "Godwin". That way, if anyone asked about his family or name change, he could say, "This discussion has been Godwinned."

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:35:36 -0800

Indeed. At least Hitler was competent.

By: ODiV

ODiV — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:40:23 -0800

tadellin: That's what we do as humans, we compare things to see where they are relative to each other. Perhaps you meant equate?

By: spiderwire

spiderwire — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:44:14 -0800

etaoin: Yes, well, good guy except for the blackmail. I think I can give him a pass for blackmailing Adolf Hitler. But just this one time.

By: ODiV

ODiV — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:45:16 -0800

Sorry. I'm being irritable this week. Ignore my snark please, tadellin.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:47:41 -0800

Now, his three sons, relatives of Hitler living normal, regular American lives, have decided to never marry and let their family line die with them This is actually not true. There was an article a while back where one of the sons, anonymously, said that was total B.S.

By: Postroad

Postroad — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:50:40 -0800

During the period of the nazis in Germany, and also in the US, evil, or those things considered bad, were believed contained in the blood. A few drops of black book (10%) made you a non-white; now we believe that it is the genes that get passed on that may help to make us what we are. There is a slight and sad irony in this: Hitler wanted to wipe out "Jewish blood." The descendants want to end genetic inheritance. Thus a few people with Hitler connection will die out as did some 6 million people with Jewish connection. Those Jews died because, assimilated or not, converted to another religion or not, they were "Jewish by blood." Hitler's descendants live now in a time when we know that there is no "Hitler gene" they might pass on, yet so guilty in mind are they that they want to end any connection of their name, their heritage, to the present.

By: Kronos_to_Earth

Kronos_to_Earth — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:51:06 -0800

Were these sons mentioned in The Boys from Brazil? I don't remember it in detail.

By: DU

DU — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:55:32 -0800

one of the sons, anonymously Heh

By: Guy_Inamonkeysuit

Guy_Inamonkeysuit — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:58:33 -0800

Abstract of an article on the family in The New Yorker, July 2000. And... A small boarding house in Minehead, Somerset.

By: jb

jb — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:59:31 -0800

This is actually not true. There was an article a while back where one of the sons, anonymously, said that was total B.S. posted by delmoi at 1:47 PM on June 6 [+] [!] I would be happy if it weren't true. Like the commentators above, I find the idea of anyone taking such an important decision because of the sins of their relatives to be sad. I realise that it's not realistic for them to reveal their names, but that is because of the irrational hatred of other people - all the more irrational and ironic, since they are hated for being genetically related to a man who is hated for saying genetics mattered to your character.

By: phliar

phliar — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:00:19 -0800

Relieved to hear that the sons did not decide to never have children (I hope it's true). Of course genes are not the end-all -- I firmly believe that any healthy baby can become a decent human being if raised well. But Hitler was not some sort of uniquely uber-ultra-evil monster either, I'm sure people of much deeper intrinsic evilness walk amongst us (they still go into politics) -- he just happened to be in a time and place where he could carry out his evilness to its fullest extent.

By: miss lynnster

miss lynnster — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:00:24 -0800

The eldest of these sons holds an even more remarkable secret; he was named after his despotic uncle. Okay, that just makes no sense whatsoever when taken in context with the rest of the article.

By: chuq

chuq — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:08:25 -0800

Indeed. At least Hitler was competent. Not to mention democratically elected!

By: uncleozzy

uncleozzy — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:11:32 -0800

Thinking of Hitler as a human being for a moment reminds me of the only worthwhile part of Max, of which I, unfortunately, can't find a video clip: John Cusack as Hitler's art dealer helping him handle a poor reception by saying, "Come on, Hitler, let me buy you a lemonade!" LEMONADE.

By: Servo5678

Servo5678 — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:27:26 -0800

I dunno; I envision someone named Willy Hitler as wearing both the Adolf mustache and a helicopter beanie. Related: Who would you want in your werewolf movie? (skip ahead to 6:10).

By: XQUZYPHYR

XQUZYPHYR — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:27:34 -0800

You know, if you were William Hitler, I just could not imagine actually going by "Willy." For some reason that doesn't make your name friendlier. I'm waiting to hear there's a Timmy Hitler and a Skippy Hitler too.

By: Dr-Baa

Dr-Baa — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:28:43 -0800

You know, I read through the articles, and I don't remember any reference to William Hitler going by the name "Willy." Maybe he prefers Bill.

By: eatdonuts

eatdonuts — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:30:55 -0800

The eldest of these sons holds an even more remarkable secret; he was named after his despotic uncle. So an Adolf Hitler lives on to this day in a forgotten corner of America. Alexander Adolf Hitler understands the enduring fascination with his great-uncle but, like his mother, he doesn't want his life overturned, and possibly endangered, by revealing his true identity. If these guys are so embarrassed by their family connection, what DO that? seriously? Didn't someone have a 'WTF we doing?' moment when that name was suggested?

By: pointystick

pointystick — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:34:26 -0800

At least Hitler was competent Yup, that Operation Barbarossa went really well.* * thank goodness

By: mdn

mdn — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:47:00 -0800

I'm waiting to hear there's a Timmy Hitler and a Skippy Hitler too. I know, it's like Ted Hitler

By: any major dude

any major dude — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:52:20 -0800

tadellin wrote: You people comparing Bush to Hitler are ridiculous. You're right tadellin, you can't compare the two. The world had the ability to stop Hitler's terror.

By: Loudmax

Loudmax — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:52:42 -0800

all the more irrational and ironic, since they are hated for being genetically related to a man who is hated for saying genetics mattered to your character. I don't want to play devil's advocate here, but Hitler is hated for going well beyond saying that genetics matter to your character. I think there's plenty of evidence to show that genetics does have quite a bit to do with the kind of person you are. As does your environment. This shouldn't be interpreted as an endorsement for anything close to eugenics. I think phliar expresses the sensible position perfectly. If Hitler's nephews have taken a vow to end their bloodline because of the crimes of their uncle, that really is sad since it was much more than Hitler's genes that enabled him to commit genocide.

By: TheOnlyCoolTim

TheOnlyCoolTim — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:52:55 -0800

etaoin: Yes, well, good guy except for the blackmail. I think I can give him a pass for blackmailing Adolf Hitler. But just this one time. I'd give him a high five. Blackmailing Hitler? Awesome and very bold. A few drops of black book (10%) made you a non-white; At least, judging by the current political climate, we seem to have progressed to some sort of much more liberal/weird 50% "one drop rule."

By: yeti

yeti — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:29:10 -0800

I would like to hereby declare Yeti's Law, which states: "As a forum discussion about Hitler grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving George W. Bush approaches one."

By: etaoin

etaoin — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:29:41 -0800

You people comparing Bush to Hitler are ridiculous. You're right tadellin, you can't compare the two. The world had the ability to stop Hitler's terror. posted by any major dude at 2:52 PM on June 6 [+] [!] I was trying to snark about the blackmailing business. Somewhere a couple of years ago, I read a lengthy story about Willy (and he did go by that name). He had lived on Long Island for quite a while. He sounded like a bit of a fool who tried to redeem himself, if I recall correctly. And I saw that swell guy Pat Buchanan on the tube last night, explaining why World War II was the "unnecessary war"--quoting Churchill and almost making sense until he got to the part about how Hitler would have stopped somewhere in France and the British could have just ignored him. Hitler would have been satisfied with that, the Holocaust wouldn't have happened (all this is what Pat says), the Russians wouldn't have gained power, etc. Win win, you see, all the way around. The Holocaust thus is the fault of the West.

By: SweetJesus

SweetJesus — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:34:06 -0800

Couldn't they just change the name back to Schicklegruber?

By: middleclasstool

middleclasstool — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:06:15 -0800

And I saw that swell guy Pat Buchanan on the tube last night, explaining why World War II was the "unnecessary war"--quoting Churchill and almost making sense until he got to the part about how Hitler would have stopped somewhere in France and the British could have just ignored him. I can think of a few reason why Pat Buchanan wouldn't have a problem with that, and none of them have to do with avoiding a World War.

By: psmealey

psmealey — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:08:23 -0800

Who'd have thought there'd be such enmity on a thread about Hitlers?

By: srboisvert

srboisvert — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:10:26 -0800

Whenever I say that I never want kids because I really fucking hate children with a passion I am just met with a very awkward cold silence. I don't feel sorry for these kids. At least they have a reason for not breeding that people will accept.

By: Pollomacho

Pollomacho — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:19:16 -0800

Oh darling, your father and I met this very nice Jewish boy, at least I think he was Jewish, he was very interested in Jews anyway. Anyway, darling, long story short, he's going to be up at the beach house at the cookout this Saturday, his name is Sheldon, and he's got this funny little moustache, but these dreamy eyes. Anyway, the important part, he's single!

By: not_on_display

not_on_display — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:21:10 -0800

Hitler? I hardly know 'er! [**ducking thrown rotting vegetables**]

By: Kid Charlemagne

Kid Charlemagne — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:34:44 -0800

Hell, I'd vote for one of these guys for president. There is nothing more American than having a racist uncle who makes you feel vaguely ashamed at family reunions and such.

By: ten pounds of inedita

ten pounds of inedita — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:46:50 -0800

I have kept a pledge not to reveal the name adopted by the Hitler family in New York, nor the town where they live. Well, y'know, when you tell us that the mother lives on Long Island, when her husband died, how many sons she had, when one of them died in a road accident and the fact that none of the four sons had any kids, it shouldn't be hard for a professional to figure out.

By: RakDaddy

RakDaddy — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:09:01 -0800

Summer in Paris, Light in the Sky

By: RakDaddy

RakDaddy — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:09:27 -0800

...I mean, from the Sky.

By: Nick Verstayne

Nick Verstayne — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:41:57 -0800

That Telegraph article was pure bullshit. The faint lilt of German folk music floated through the open window of the dark-wood alpine bungalow as I walked down the short path to the front door. Really? Maybe they've cleaned up their act since 2001/2002 when this crap all started being peddled.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 15:01:26 -0800

Meatbomb's Law: The volume of Hitler media is in fixed proportion to all other media, regardless of the rate of growth in media overall. Commentary: The commonly observed phenomena of increased levels of Hitler media is only a natural result in the growth of media generally, i.e. "WTF? Why all the Hitler?" "Same as it ever was."

By: bunnytricks

bunnytricks — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 15:53:43 -0800

I can't imagine being Hitler's relative and not making a mad spectacle out of it. Fuck anonymity, I'd wear a pink swastika eyepatch and threaten people with my genocide powered vril gun while keeping my wallet stuffed through corporate speaking gigs.

By: kuppajava

kuppajava — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:31:20 -0800

in one of the PDF files from the FBI, containing for whatever reason a nearly complete copy of an entire day's newspaper, scroll to page 30 to see an ad for the movie The Great Dictator! Awesome bit of irony!

By: bwg

bwg — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:59:30 -0800

I'm surprised no one has yet said: I'd Hitler that!

By: First Post

First Post — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 17:04:06 -0800

I've seen this six year old article on more than one site today. Interesting.

By: TheOnlyCoolTim

TheOnlyCoolTim — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 17:33:51 -0800

Not that interesting. I once watched an FPP of mine and found the time from Metafilter posting to Digg submission was about 20 minutes. Didn't make the Digg front page, but there were no cahoots on my part.

By: dr_dank

dr_dank — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 18:09:08 -0800

Well, y'know, when you tell us that the mother lives on Long Island, when her husband died, how many sons she had, when one of them died in a road accident and the fact that none of the four sons had any kids, it shouldn't be hard for a professional to figure out. The property straddled two small roads on a forested private estate nestling into one of the bays tucked behind slivers of land protecting the New York coastline from the full impact of the Atlantic Ocean. - South shore of Long Island. I knew William Patrick would not be answering the door. I had just been to visit his grave, a 20-minute drive away, at the closest Roman Catholic cemetery, where I was given the name and address of his widow, Phyllis. - Probably referring to Holy Rood Cemetery in Westbury. My inquiries to discover what had happened to him eventually led me to a small cemetery tucked beside a freeway in Long Island, where I found that Brigid and William Patrick shared the same grave. Sounds like Greenbriar cemetary in Uniondale, the Southern State Parkway runs behind it. With these clues and the fact that they seem to live in a wealthy part of LI, I'd put my money on Oyster Bay as the Hitler's adopted hometown.

By: Ron Thanagar

Ron Thanagar — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 18:17:18 -0800

This explains why I never see any signs for HITLER'S USED CARS or whatever...

By: Pope Guilty

Pope Guilty — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 18:38:06 -0800

Hitler at least had the good taste to kill himself.

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 18:54:49 -0800

I'd Hitler that! "Oh, that's definitely a reset." - cortex

By: spiderwire

spiderwire — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 18:59:28 -0800

By: lhauser

lhauser — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 20:36:38 -0800

Wasn't it Hill Street Blues that had the standup comedian character Vic Hitler? Gotta love the '80s...

By: bunnytricks

bunnytricks — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 00:45:40 -0800

Right, but what would you do differently? Well, my penis would no longer be merely named 'The Spear of Destiny,' but would be the crowning achievement of Nazi uroesoteric bioengineering.

By: acrobat

acrobat — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 04:03:24 -0800

A guy goes to the registry office and wants to know what it takes to change his name. "Well", says the clerk, "this is rather tricky. You must have a pretty good reason why you want your name changed. What is your name?". "My name is Adolf Shithead" says the guy. "Well, sir, I think this is a pretty good reason for a name change. What would you like your new name to be?" The guy says " Rudolph. I want to be named Rudolph Shithead. This Adolph thing reminds me of Hitler"!

By: acrobat

acrobat — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 04:12:31 -0800

"As a forum discussion about Hitler grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving George W. Bush approaches one." No way! Hitler had a brain!

By: munchbunch

munchbunch — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 05:32:33 -0800

Well at least none of the Hitlers were caught on camera enjoying Nazi themed sex acts with 5 prostitutes like Max Mosley, head of Formula 1 racing's governing body and sun of infamous British facist and friend of Hitler's Sir Oswald Mosley.

By: kyrademon

kyrademon — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 05:48:54 -0800

About, oh, seven years back, I discovered that a casual friend of mine was the grandson of the prominent Nazi party official who, during World War II, was probably directly responsible for ordering the deaths of my entire family, except for a few who had escaped to the U.S. It was kind of weird. The grandson was a nice guy. Worked as a crewman on replica nineteenth-century sailing vessels. I lost track of him when I moved away from Boston.

By: crazylegs

crazylegs — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 10:51:03 -0800

"sun of infamous British facist" this thread needs a spelling nazi.

By: LilBucner

LilBucner — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 20:47:47 -0800

yes, too bad about the brothers deciding never to marry or reproduce, because then none of their dateless friends can complain "Even Hitler has a girlfriend!"