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Garkov -- Garfield + Markov chains
June 6, 2008 3:31 PM   Subscribe


 
[this is good]
posted by loquacious at 3:35 PM on June 6, 2008


"Mister Fun" is sorting his socks.
posted by Flashman at 3:38 PM on June 6, 2008




Woe indeed.

Wow.
posted by rtha at 3:42 PM on June 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


It's just the text - for a second I thought it was pasting together individual frames at random with the original text. Still, fun.
posted by GuyZero at 3:43 PM on June 6, 2008


Hi!

I considered doing it panel-by-panel, actually, and I might try that variation at some point, but I kind of like the way that the original visual narrative gives the nonsense a sort of structure in these. With random panels I think it might read like, well, random panels instead of a cohesive (if idiotic or surreal) story.

I wrote the db code for this at like 3am when I couldn't sleep this morning, so it kind of keeps falling over. I think I've resolved some of the issues and have kind of found a bootstrap method for dealing with the remaining problems, but it's been crazy ride already today tracking down my insomniacal mistakes in real time.
posted by cortex at 3:48 PM on June 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


enable images for the love of god :(
posted by boo_radley at 3:52 PM on June 6, 2008


Ha, awesomely surreal.

Yeah, definitely keep the panel ordering in-tact. Is there a way you could use image recognition to automagically figure out where the bubbles are? This is, of course, non-trivial, but it's actually not super difficult in the realm of image processing.

Or, even better, you could make a front-end for people to contribute their own blankened comics, and where we can manually specify where the text would go.
posted by spiderskull at 3:52 PM on June 6, 2008


Some of these are probably funnier than the original. Good work.
posted by djgh at 3:54 PM on June 6, 2008




Ready for your cake?
posted by Citizen Premier at 4:02 PM on June 6, 2008


It's just the text - for a second I thought it was pasting together individual frames at random with the original text.

Someone else did that a year or two ago. It was pretty awesome, but this is even better.

Let's talk dignity here
The ratings wars escalate
I hate to see a grown man grovel
Almost Bob Dylan-esque

Garfield works really well for stuff like this. I guess it's the total inanity of the original dialogue.
posted by DecemberBoy at 4:04 PM on June 6, 2008


This was my best.
posted by team lowkey at 4:15 PM on June 6, 2008 [1 favorite]




Some of these made me giggle.
posted by Citizen Premier at 4:18 PM on June 6, 2008


Interesting, but not nearly as funny as Markovfilter.
posted by grouse at 4:21 PM on June 6, 2008


Existential despair

Some of these are probably funnier than the original. Good work.

So far, at worst they've been as funny as the original. That's the thing about Garfield - it's hard to not improve it.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 4:27 PM on June 6, 2008


But for now, lets enjoy the moment

Whoa. Poignant.

Also, Uh oh my head is stuck.
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:28 PM on June 6, 2008




Garfield is best with no dialogue, though.
posted by eustatic at 4:44 PM on June 6, 2008


let's go play!
posted by davejay at 4:46 PM on June 6, 2008 [5 favorites]


There was an article some time back about how Jim Davis, previously an ad man, had design Garfield explicitly to be bland and faintly memorable. If Garfield as a comic had had too much ambition or personality, it wouldn't be so universally successful, especially as a whole line of products. Garfield functions mostly as a series of advertisements for Garfield merchandise, not as a comic intended to be all that funny.

I think this goes a long way towards explaining how Garfield lends itself so naturally to all these weird little art experiments. It's not merely a bad or a common comic, but a bland and reliable one, so that variations on it are immediately obvious and strike a chord in short order.

Also this is fun. I love Markov chains. I would also like to give another shout-out to Lasagna Cat.
posted by Sticherbeast at 4:56 PM on June 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


The site is currently being hammered so hard that I cannot run the bits of bootstrap code I'm using to prop up my own bad coding. I think I know what I'm doing this weekend.
posted by cortex at 5:13 PM on June 6, 2008


^cortex: The site is currently being hammered so hard that I cannot run the bits of bootstrap code I'm using to prop up my own bad coding. I think I know what I'm doing this weekend.

And that's how I WIN AT TEH METAFITELR!!~! ...next I have to distract mathowie somehow.
posted by not_on_display at 5:23 PM on June 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


This is awesome, though it would be even better if there was a larger pool of strips to draw from. Right now it seems like there is only 7-8?

Also: The Nietzsche Family Circus
posted by paradoxflow at 5:33 PM on June 6, 2008 [2 favorites]


Yeah. It takes 5-10 minutes a pop to set up a new strip, but I'm hoping to get at least another dozen or so up soon.
posted by cortex at 5:37 PM on June 6, 2008


Pluck me a heifer!
posted by mr_crash_davis at 5:42 PM on June 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


My favourites are the ones with Jon waking up. Because the surreal text works as dream mumbling, so then you just have to hope you get something in the last panel like:
Jon - "I exist to feed Garfield."
G - "You have coffee from Brazil."

I wish I could just reload that one strip over and over.
posted by yellowbinder at 6:16 PM on June 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


> let's go play!

I am laughing so hard I'm crying.
posted by xbonesgt at 6:32 PM on June 6, 2008


Find us some sheep!
posted by wendell at 7:11 PM on June 6, 2008


Yay, this is great.
posted by unknowncommand at 7:13 PM on June 6, 2008


Awseomer than the original Garfield Randomizer. It got taken down, but someone posted the code, and I saved it. I load it up every once in a while, and it still works, as all the garfield strips that it was pulling from are still there, but this is a solid step beyond.
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:42 PM on June 6, 2008


More evidence that there's nothing you can do to a garfield strip that won't make it funnier.
posted by mhoye at 8:22 PM on June 6, 2008


Complete awesome.
posted by odinsdream at 8:28 PM on June 6, 2008


The greatest thing about Garkov is enjoying the math behind it. Yay for Markov chains + the inanity of Garfield and such. Interesting though that as a kid I loved Garfield, but now these manipulations of the strip are all that I can stand.
posted by lizarrd at 8:36 PM on June 6, 2008


Just in case any of you MeFi readers didn't know, MetaFilter has its own MarkovFilter that works on any one user's commenting history.

Also, I am again awed at the inanity and genius of cortex' projects.
posted by carsonb at 9:07 PM on June 6, 2008


MarkovFilter is better than Garkov.

What about Febreze? That's supposed to fulfill your craving for carbohydrates. Maybe it was ridiculous to accuse languagehat of being at home. I believe it, but that's about how people sleep when their refugee claim is denied
posted by guyzero at 11:44 PM on June 6 [+] [!]

It's like it's actually me!
posted by GuyZero at 11:45 PM on June 6, 2008


MarkovFilter

If you see your rent check as a people need to embrace a multi-cuisine system if we can take over one of which earned them a trip to the hospital for exposure. All of these are factors. My instinct is that I'm speeding if I have a culture that is convinced that you are delicious and will stop at nothing short of lethal blunt force trauma to get into it. He stepped back with a few pidgeons cause I'd be swell if my sister had been discarded. Casually tossed away.

Hmmm,

Guess I'm not needed here anymore.

*gunshot*
posted by The Power Nap at 1:07 AM on June 7, 2008


There are real Markov filters, you know.</nofun>
posted by tss at 2:33 AM on June 7, 2008


I keep a text file of the best MarkovFilters. I know they've been posted in threads here ad nauseum so I won't take up more space, but it's a better time-waster than most flash games, for sure.
posted by Devils Rancher at 6:06 AM on June 7, 2008


I think older Garfield strips are much better than newer ones. Comic Strip Doctor's page on it illustrates what I'm talking about.
posted by JHarris at 12:11 PM on June 7, 2008


Oh, the title of this game is overblown. The ever-present cultural satire is often very beneficial in these situations. For example, hate groups really embraced the power of the country at least, to have an extended field day sorting through the texts, looking for clues within and without the woman as his significant other, a kind of batshitinsane, but fans of Pale Fire should appreciate it.
posted by naju at 10:01 PM on June 7, 2008


MarkovFilter sez:

From my own experience dealing with fundamentalists, this will be a big white van in my driveway. No, really.

Hey, all you people who bought his records - this is your fault. You know who you are.
posted by obvious at 10:17 PM on June 7, 2008


Garkov's undercarriage has been rewritten. You can once more save strips, as well as view people's saved strips in the Hall of Fame.
posted by cortex at 10:24 PM on June 7, 2008




cortex: you can fix the bugs, but then... can you fix those pesky fleas?
posted by not_on_display at 6:01 PM on June 8, 2008


If you DO switch to a dermatologist, he prescribed me some shampoo, and POW!, it was consensual sex.
posted by popechunk at 6:49 PM on June 8, 2008


Oh, THIRDING too much of a related tidbit: hookworm prevalency in the moment.

How about fritter.metafilter.com, or internationalhouseof.metafilter.com? Only posts about fritters, pancakes and similar crimes.
posted by davejay at 1:35 PM on June 10, 2008


Ok, I'm still loving Garkov. Any chance of an RSS feed for the Hall of Fame? (I can haz Garkov pony???///)
posted by yellowbinder at 9:33 AM on June 11, 2008


That's not a bad idea, yellowbinder. Though the Hall of Fame is a bit of a firehouse at this point; I designed with maybe a few strips a day getting saved, and instead it's been hundreds a day, which would be an awful lot to find in your feed reader.

I'm thinking about ways to introduce a little more quality control into the process (perhaps via some voting-on-the-archives component), and if I get that into good shape I think an RSS feed would be a natural addition, yeah.
posted by cortex at 10:00 AM on June 11, 2008


Heh, I for one wouldn't mind hundreds a day, but I'm sure many would. Quality control is a good thing. So is this one.
posted by yellowbinder at 11:23 AM on June 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Oh. I see.

Four, hell. Give me nine million and a melody will match up, and she's got her head screwed on straight. I agree they'd be tough and stringy on the religion. Depends on what she wants: gear or sheet music or a mandible, or even herpes, to a few classmates, get in a nice guy who's trying to apply to me!
posted by nebulawindphone at 3:46 PM on June 12, 2008


I love that kinda stuff. I think sounds close to home way, he thought, typing it into the English language.
posted by not_on_display at 11:47 AM on June 20, 2008


A winner every time!
posted by lekvar at 3:59 PM on June 27, 2008


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