Comments on: Iranian Photoshoping Skills

Iranian Photoshoping Skills

gman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 07:50:25 -0800

In response to Israel's show of might, Iran tested long range missiles capable of hitting Israel and other U.S. targets in the region. Was the image AFP used photoshopped?

By: beerbajay

beerbajay — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 07:52:30 -0800

So Israel is one of these "U.S. targets"?

By: DU

DU — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 07:55:10 -0800

So Israel is one of these "U.S. targets"? It isn't?

By: grabbingsand

grabbingsand — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 07:58:31 -0800

Was it PhotoShopped? Yes. What did I win?

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:01:03 -0800

I could tell by the pixels.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:01:35 -0800

If you can't trust official Iranian Governmental communications, what can you trust?

By: aiq

aiq — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:02:16 -0800

The Crusades go on, decreeded by Pope Exxon the Ruthless.

By: gman

gman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:03:40 -0800

If you can't trust official Iranian Governmental communications, what can you trust? FOX.

By: Skeptic

Skeptic — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:05:08 -0800

Oh dear, a military organisation releases photos retouched to make it look mightier than it is. Never happened before...

By: DU

DU — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:06:50 -0800

I'm not sure a radical theocracy with 3 missiles + Photoshop is really any less mighty than a radical theocracy with 4 missiles.

By: rokusan

rokusan — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:09:16 -0800

I'm not sure a radical theocracy with 3 missiles + Photoshop is really any less mighty... Actually they're much scarier. Even if you take out their missile facilities, they can just clone more of them!

By: Debaser626

Debaser626 — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:11:29 -0800

I'm no expert, but I can plainly see that that image was not photoshopped. In the 1ST IMAGE there ARE 4 MISSILES. In the 2ND IMAGE there ARE 3 MISSILES. Where did the MISSILE go? OR did they just make up a MISSILE out of MAGIC. Also, you'll note that there is A WHITE TRUCK in one image and NO WHITE TRUCK in the other image. You TERRORISTS will stop at nothing to ACHIEVE your DEVIL agendas on the (w)orld. THIS POST reminds me of the time I was in HEATHROW AIRPORT with my canister of LIQUID STABILIZED OXYGEN. The MAN took my OXYGEN and....

By: fire&wings

fire&wings — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:12:30 -0800

The undoctored image is compositionally far more satisfying.

By: stifford

stifford — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:13:25 -0800

I hear Iran may have acquired LOLCAT technology, from the Black Market.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:15:21 -0800

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:16:42 -0800

Shahab is a cool name, though. What does it mean? Is it named after the inventor, Joe Shahab?

By: Thorzdad

Thorzdad — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:20:28 -0800

Yup. Shopped. BFD. They're wagging their dick and realized it looked a bit small in the real pic. 3 missiles becomes 4 missiles...what's the difference? They're still missiles. Old-tech, to be sure, but still missiles. In other news, Israel already has nukes and capable missiles and has shown a willingness to preemptively attack other nations. Hell, if I were the target of all the US/Israel saber-rattling, I'd sure as hell rattle back as much as I could, too.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:21:12 -0800

They haven't learned their lesson yet, and have released yet another doctored photo.

By: rokusan

rokusan — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:25:35 -0800

Shahab is a cool name, though. What does it mean? It's Farsi for "comet" or "falling star".

By: jedicus

jedicus — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:26:02 -0800

Mister_A, shahab means a meteor or shooting star in Farsi.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:26:09 -0800

If you look closer, you can see Evil Bert photoshopped onto one of the copied missiles.

By: jedicus

jedicus — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:26:25 -0800

Curses!

By: Bathtub Bobsled

Bathtub Bobsled — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:31:04 -0800

Only Jewish people will get this joke: Looks like the Iranians gave us a taste of Kitsch-shahab!

By: brain_drain

brain_drain — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:32:13 -0800

The missiles in the altered photo also have clearer skin and larger breasts.

By: pardonyou?

pardonyou? — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:33:38 -0800

Actually, the guess is that it was photoshopped to block out a missle that apparently malfunctioned. Presumably they didn't want to highlight the fact that 25% of their missles failed.

By: punkfloyd

punkfloyd — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:35:12 -0800

On a serious note, to what extent does the world now think they are "photoshopping" their broader nuclear intent(s)?

By: goodnewsfortheinsane

goodnewsfortheinsane — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:37:31 -0800

Only Jewish people will get this joke: Is it a pun on shish kebab?

By: matteo

matteo — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:37:53 -0800

Presumably they didn't want to highlight the fact that 25% of their missles failed. 25% of missiles on 9/11 failed to hit the target, too. it was still a pretty successful operation.

By: pardonyou?

pardonyou? — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:41:12 -0800

25% of missiles on 9/11 failed to hit the target, too. it was still a pretty successful operation. No doubt, but not the point. This whole exercise was a "flex my muscles" show of strength, and governments like Iran aren't really inclined to show any weakness, particularly if they can cover it up with a little photoshopping.

By: stavrogin

stavrogin — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:41:31 -0800

I saw one description which said "Iran now has missiles that are capable of hitting all of Israel." Seems kind of silly to make a missile that only gets halfway across Israel... it's not that big a country. smackfu, is that a Mount of Olives pun? I've spent the last twenty minutes looking at maps and wikipedia articles trying to figure it out and I just have to know.

By: Bathtub Bobsled

Bathtub Bobsled — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:42:18 -0800

Is it a pun on shish kebab? No. Sorry if I'm being anal, but what I did was a "spoonerism" where one switches the first consonants of a word to make a humorous and, at times, absurd turn of phrase. See "cunning stunt". And kitsch is a Yiddish word for "tasteless art", which I think applies. I only knew that because I dated a Jewish girl named Judith who used to fart in her sleep... a lot.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:46:05 -0800

smackfu, is that a Mount of Olives pun? I don't think so, but if it is, I take full credit.

By: stavrogin

stavrogin — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:48:18 -0800

Well, now I'm just confused.

By: optovox

optovox — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:48:33 -0800

Dear Penatgon Officials, I'm an art director and graphic designer, and I offer you my congratulations on your plans to begin another war. It's an exciting time for everyone. I have almost two decades of experience in marketing and branding, and I have noticed you need a photo-retouching expert with extensive Photoshop skills as well as a marketing and branding consultant to help you produce the appropriate propaganda to convince Americans of your need to invade Iran and minimize the numbers of people who will oppose it. I can also help you effectively reach your target audiences, make your opposition and detractors look foolish, and I partner with public and media relations consultants who can refine and manage your messaging so your war receives the maximum amount of popularity and political support. I have an extensive portfolio of marketing and photo-retouching work, and I look forward to working with you.

By: DU

DU — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:49:41 -0800

Only Jewish people have heard of "shish-kebab" and "kitsch"? So I'm Jewish now? Oy!

By: Postroad

Postroad — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:51:43 -0800

Why isn't the press also noting that both Israel and a number of nations have anti-missle defenses that have been tested and can knock that photoshopped stuff out? Why would Iran try to send a muissle to Israel when israel has nukes that can be sent in return?

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:53:29 -0800

is that a Mount of Olives pun? No, this is: Why does Popeye hate Jesus? Because he went to Mount Olive. I am twelve.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 08:54:50 -0800

You and me both, DU. And we, the chosen people, could use maybe a funnier joke?

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:00:53 -0800

Well, thank you, Bathtub Bobsled, for enlightening us all.

By: quin

quin — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:02:49 -0800

If four missiles is a more impressive than three, then they really should have gone big and photoshopped it to 100 missiles. Or a thousand. I would have had the entire skyline of the picture completely covered with ascending rockets at different heights. You want a show of force? I'll show you force, we've got so many missiles, that they are banging into one another in the sky! You are going to have to fight in the shade when these bad boys are coming for you, because they are going to block out the motherfucking sun! We've got three missiles for each and every person and we can launch them all at once. Yeah, that's right, you better run... Amateurs.

By: Justinian

Justinian — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:17:42 -0800

And kitsch is a Yiddish word for "tasteless art", which I think applies. I only knew that because I dated a Jewish girl named Judith who used to fart in her sleep... a lot. Uh, I hate to be the one to break this to you but "kitsch" is an extremely common English word now. Yeah, we stole it from Yiddish. But that's no different than lasagna, algebra, or faux pas.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:19:47 -0800

Or flammschmeisser. You forgot flammschmeisser.

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:27:37 -0800

Dude, lasagna isn't from Yiddish.

By: DU

DU — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:28:02 -0800

But that's no different than lasagna, algebra, or faux pas. My chef, math teacher and Miss Manners are going to be surprised...

By: kolophon

kolophon — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:38:25 -0800

Is it a yiddish word? Because I thought it's of german derivation, other than yiddish loan words that were assimilated into german and english. Like schlamassel or chuzpe.

By: sleepy pete

sleepy pete — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:38:45 -0800

No. Sorry if I'm being anal, but what I did was a "spoonerism" where one switches the first consonants of a word to make a humorous and, at times, absurd turn of phrase. See "cunning stunt". And kitsch is a Yiddish word for "tasteless art", which I think applies. I only knew that because I dated a Jewish girl named Judith who used to fart in her sleep... a lot. from merriam-webster online: KITSCH Main Entry: kitsch Pronunciation: \ˈkich\ Function: noun Etymology: German Date: 1925 1 : something that appeals to popular or lowbrow taste and is often of poor quality 2 : a tacky or lowbrow quality or condition There's also this one from Baudrillard, for what that's worth. It's not necessarily Yiddish. Yiddish actually is an amalgam of several lanuguages, but maybe you knew that. Also, I think this "anal" thing carries over into your life more than you may have suspected.

By: kolophon

kolophon — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:38:48 -0800

Kitsch, I mean.

By: kolophon

kolophon — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:40:17 -0800

ok, should have hit preview. What sleepy pete said.

By: DU

DU — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:44:44 -0800

Also, a spoonerism, being a play on words, is a (category of) pun.

By: Civil_Disobedient

Civil_Disobedient — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:47:34 -0800

You forgot flammschmeisser. And blitzkrieg.

By: Postroad

Postroad — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:57:12 -0800

the thread seems to have goe astray like an Iranian missle but Susan Sontag has a great essay on kitsch.

By: Flashman

Flashman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:57:35 -0800

While the U.S. uses "Shock & Awe" against its enemies, Iran prefers "Dodge & Burn."

By: spicynuts

spicynuts — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:59:53 -0800

And putz

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:06:45 -0800

and doodlesack.

By: Flashman

Flashman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:07:37 -0800

But the fact that they did this only means Israel/the U.S. has even less of a reason to be worried *, as it further exposes the exercise as merely a chest-thumping photo-op. Now, if Iran were to be testing long-range missiles in absolute secrecy, that might be a cause for concern. *or, more likely, of an excuse to act even more beligerent

By: fingers_of_fire

fingers_of_fire — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:09:20 -0800

schmuck

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:09:39 -0800

It is not possible to test long-range missiles in absolute secrecy, unless you do it indoors.

By: Justinian

Justinian — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:17:19 -0800

Ask Metafilter on the etymology of the word kitsch Oh, AskMefi. Is there anything you can't do?

By: ryoshu

ryoshu — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:28:03 -0800

You want a show of force? I'll show you force, we've got so many missiles, that they are banging into one another in the sky! You are going to have to fight in the shade when these bad boys are coming for you, because they are going to block out the motherfucking sun! Then we'll fight in the shade! /sparta

By: ZenMasterThis

ZenMasterThis — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:33:59 -0800

...capable of hitting Israel... "Israel: I'd hit it." --Iran

By: furtive

furtive — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:43:55 -0800

NY Times article about the attack of the clones (includes original photo at the bottom). Attack of the phones!

By: furtive

furtive — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:45:32 -0800

Doh, didn't realize the first link was in the post.

By: gman

gman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:54:12 -0800

Although not Yiddish, I always found the Israelis' nickname of "Khumeini" for this really annoying/prevalent brown beetle - to be fairly amusing.

By: asok

asok — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:04:25 -0800

Dear Penatgon Officials I think you'll find that it's 'Dear Petnagon Officials'. /good in-jokes get better with time

By: aiq

aiq — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:05:04 -0800

I wonder if Bush has time to start a war with Iran AND reinstate the draft before leaving office?

By: dibblda

dibblda — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:05:25 -0800

Well, here is an image of the real missile test.

By: Pollomacho

Pollomacho — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:13:45 -0800

So I'm Jewish now? Oy! Mazel tov! A mobile moile has been dispatched from the call center to collect your schmuck.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:21:39 -0800

It's not necessarily Yiddish. Yiddish actually is an amalgam of several languages, but maybe you knew that. Ah-ha!!! So Judith was farting in her sleep a lot auf Deutsch!

By: Djinh

Djinh — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:22:37 -0800

News: US rattles sabers by threatening nuclear war on Iran Other news: Iran rattles sabers back by launching long range missiles Metafilter: Ohh look! Photoshop!

By: tgyg

tgyg — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:25:33 -0800

Teehee, dibblda.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:27:51 -0800

Well, Djinh, I could argue that we're discussing the dangerous unreliability of the media and the ease at which important information is fabricated, but we just spent a good portion of this thread discussing the etymology of "Kitsch." Which means you're still wrong. HAH HAH!

By: clearly

clearly — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:53:26 -0800

How did a Flock of Seagulls single develop long range missiles? ...much less learn photoshop.

By: clearly

clearly — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:55:24 -0800

When voting is enabled, I am voting for your entry, dibblda.

By: aldus_manutius

aldus_manutius — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:59:15 -0800

Good one, Djinh ... we are amused.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:10:33 -0800

That guy in the truck in the real photo must be in really deep shit. "Achmed, what the fuck is wrong with you? We said on se, on se, you know how to count to fucking se, right? Yek, do, se... well now you can learn it from the rubber fucking hose."

By: Pollomacho

Pollomacho — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:30:56 -0800

We said on se, on se, you know how to count to fucking se, right? Yek, do, se... On a related note: Yek do se

By: gman

gman — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 15:20:28 -0800

I hear Iran may have acquired LOLCAT technology, from the Black Market. indeed.

By: Pollomacho

Pollomacho — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 17:01:03 -0800

On a related note: Yek do se Damnit! That last link was supposed to go here! Yo, strait outta Encino- wetin' chadores from Tehran to Tehrangeles! That's what I get for trying to link blind at work!

By: malocchio

malocchio — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 07:44:49 -0800

Just wait until they get their MySpace page up and running.