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I'm the Batman
July 18, 2008 11:01 AM   Subscribe

In the Dark Knight Returns, Batman had to go toe to toe with Superman. Because of his intimacy with the role from the new Batman Film, Christian Bale gives a unique perspective on that epic fight. (Last link has some profanity)
posted by Lord_Pall (45 comments total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: this is int he batman thread form two days ago and is a weak post that everyone seems to hate. -- jessamyn



 
I think this is hilarious. But more oh no they didn't hilarious, metafilter hilarious... not so much. Still A++
posted by spec80 at 11:04 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


This is a little thin.
posted by shakespeherian at 11:05 AM on July 18, 2008


I wasn't sure actually. It's a very very funny piece. Not really much shorter than a classic SLYT post. I figured giving a bit of context might provide a little more metafilteriness..

But hey, it's the internet.. what can one man do?
posted by Lord_Pall at 11:06 AM on July 18, 2008


Batman has never done his own laundry, ever.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 11:06 AM on July 18, 2008


Is there a transcript?
posted by stavrogin at 11:06 AM on July 18, 2008


That's it?
posted by ardgedee at 11:07 AM on July 18, 2008


Also, 'funny' tag misleading.
posted by ardgedee at 11:07 AM on July 18, 2008


I'll be in the car.
posted by Smart Dalek at 11:08 AM on July 18, 2008


I wish there had been original jokes in there.
posted by Hollow at 11:13 AM on July 18, 2008


I LOLed. And then spent several hours ildy combining my and Christian Bale's names, wondering what it will look like when we are married. Should I hypenate.

Astro Bale
Astro Bale-Zombie
Astro Zombie-Bale
Astro Zombie Bale (does Zombie work as a middle name?)
Astro Christian Bale
Astro Christian Bale Zombie
Astro Christian Bale-Zombie
Astro Christian Zombie-Bale
Astro Batman-Zombie
Astro Zombie-Batman
Astro Christian Zombie-Batman

I think I like the last one best.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:13 AM on July 18, 2008 [15 favorites]


Well, it's not like we have any Batman-vs-Superman discussions referencing Dark Knight Returns going on in more than a couple of open threads.
posted by Artw at 11:15 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


The Wonder Woman stuff made it all worthwhile.
posted by hifiparasol at 11:16 AM on July 18, 2008


Hm, I see some changes were made to adapt the storyline for the Really Small Screen. For example, the kryptonite ring that Superman gave Batman wasn't used in Dark Knight Returns. In fact, since DKR occurred in an alternate future of Silver Age DC, there was no ring to use. Also, Lois and Jimmy were no where to be found in the storyline, not to mention the battle. Were they even alive?

Worst. Adaptation. Evar.
posted by Plutor at 11:18 AM on July 18, 2008


"Zombie" and "Christian" are redundant, AMIRITE?!?
posted by DU at 11:19 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


I'd just like to chime in here and say that Christian Bale hasn't done anything worthwhile since 'Newsies'. The Machinist was particularly thin.

See what I did there?
posted by Pecinpah at 11:20 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


I feel like someone is fucking with my internet connection and everyone else is either seeing a) a different metafilter or b) a different, funny animated gif.
posted by Skorgu at 11:20 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


"Zombie" and "Christian" are redundant, AMIRITE?!?

Not until the Second Coming.
posted by cog_nate at 11:24 AM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


LOL, both Plutor and DU win teh internet!
posted by mrzer0 at 11:28 AM on July 18, 2008


You're the batman now, dog metafilter!
posted by shmegegge at 11:29 AM on July 18, 2008


Batman has never done his own laundry, ever.

Wonderwoman didn't get the joke either.
posted by three blind mice at 11:30 AM on July 18, 2008


Look, that is one of my favorite animated gifs, but this is not a MeFi post.

I'm the goddamned batman.

I mean, at least you could have talked about little batman, or the insane amount of lego blue, or rather, bat, or the movie gossip of Jack Nicholson being first furious about not being given the role and then almost posthumously patriachal in his "Oh I warned him it was going to blow his mind."

You could have reached into the comics and talked about the history of the batman logo, or the strong animated efforts that the Batman franchise has breathed life into over the past ten years, revitalizing it.
posted by cavalier at 11:37 AM on July 18, 2008


More like Bruce Whine, amirite?!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:37 AM on July 18, 2008


Hm, I see some changes were made to adapt the storyline

Best Comic Book Guy act ever.
posted by rokusan at 11:38 AM on July 18, 2008


The long road towards the revival of in-thread images has now begun...

First came the SLYT. Now SLAG (single link animated gifs). Soon SLI (single link images), and it is but a short step from there to get back our previous in-thread images.

I can has lolcats?
posted by splice at 11:39 AM on July 18, 2008


I like Batman, but the BatFilter's getting to be a bit much.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:47 AM on July 18, 2008


Needs more cakefarts.
posted by phaedon at 11:54 AM on July 18, 2008


Jersey isn't funny, even if it is Batman.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:00 PM on July 18, 2008


The Aristocrats! *pant* *pant* *gasp*. What?
posted by boo_radley at 12:02 PM on July 18, 2008 [1 favorite]


also I'm preparing a post about things one simply cannot do to get into Mordor. This is like a canary in a cage for me.

So far, I have:
* Rock
* Slip and slide
* Walken
* spy-crab-walk
* frock (boromir is wearing a dress, just delightful)
* Spock
posted by boo_radley at 12:06 PM on July 18, 2008


Wow, what a pile of shit.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 12:17 PM on July 18, 2008


I just start by saying I'm not a nerd.

It depends if the fight was planned or not. If the tussle was spontaneous, Superman wins.

If The Batman had time to plan....The Bat.

So the answer is the Bat. Batman wouldn't fight an alien with superpowers without a plan.
posted by Mblue at 12:18 PM on July 18, 2008


Mblue, my rule of thumb is that nobody can defeat Batman more than once.
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:21 PM on July 18, 2008


The Batman won. Cuz he planned some shit! That was very funny. I love Bale. He's permanently eating granola.
posted by Flex1970 at 12:23 PM on July 18, 2008


I long for more posts about President-elect Obama.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:32 PM on July 18, 2008


this is why christian bale isn't getting oscar buzz and heath ledger is.
posted by Stynxno at 12:35 PM on July 18, 2008


Flagged as weak.
posted by ursus_comiter at 12:37 PM on July 18, 2008


No one cried BOYZONE yet re Wonder Woman's tits et al... oh, I'll do it then..
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 12:39 PM on July 18, 2008


No one cried BOYZONE yet re Wonder Woman's tits et al... oh, I'll do it then..

Heh.
posted by Mblue at 12:44 PM on July 18, 2008


Then I'm going to yell GIRLZONE when someone mentions a dick. Lighten the fuck up.
posted by cellphone at 12:45 PM on July 18, 2008


If Batman and Superman were fighting on a huge conveyor belt, would Superman be able to fly?
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 12:50 PM on July 18, 2008 [2 favorites]


Didn't I post this in the other batman thread like two days ago, cause it was funny in the context of already talking about batman, but didn't really deserve it's own FPP?
answer: yes, yes I did.
posted by The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew at 12:52 PM on July 18, 2008


Animated GIFs? What is this, 1997?

And, seriously. Impact?
posted by dhartung at 1:08 PM on July 18, 2008


so fun to log into metafilter every once in a while and see what the internet looked like a year ago
posted by badstone at 1:09 PM on July 18, 2008


This is such a zonezone.
posted by everichon at 1:14 PM on July 18, 2008


Oh sorry, I forgot it's YANKZONE and you don't do irony...
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 1:15 PM on July 18, 2008


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