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Traction Park
July 21, 2008 5:09 PM   Subscribe

Active in the years before padded jungle gyms (and class action lawsuits), Action Park was a sometimes bloody rite of passage for many New Jersey kids. Infamous for its gravity-and-friction-defying looping waterslide and beer gardens, it eventually produced so many injuries that the park bought the surrounding city extra ambulances to cope. It still is alive in many New Jersey hearts today.<-video.

Action Park is now no longer in operation, with a new waterpark named Mountain Creek having inherited its location, but not its dubious safety record. Or watersnakes. Or 40 foot diving cliff located on top of a public swimming area. Or flesh burning fibreglass alpine slide.
posted by concreteforest (70 comments total) 53 users marked this as a favorite

 
Action Park ruled
posted by poppo at 5:14 PM on July 21, 2008


Post X + Post Y = Post Z!

WHich isn't to shit in this thread at all. This is awesome. Just a weird confluence of posts today.
posted by Navelgazer at 5:17 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


Yep. I went there as a kid. Good times.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 5:17 PM on July 21, 2008


Best Shellac Record At Action Park
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 5:17 PM on July 21, 2008


I flipped upside down on a flume ride and landed on my neck. I was stunned, and wound up having the next person in line smash into me while I was gasping for air.

When I recovered, I found myself at the recovery pool at the bottom with a lifeguard glommed onto me. When they figured I wasn't paralyzed or dead, they took me to an office and pressed me to sign a release, and wound up ejecting me when I didn't.
posted by boo_radley at 5:20 PM on July 21, 2008 [2 favorites]


OMFG that place looks awesome!!! The fact that it took so many people out ADDS to the awesomeness.

That full-loop waterslide in the third link is one of the gnarliest things I've ever seen. Any of you mefites who were lucky enough to frequent this place ever try it?
posted by nudar at 5:24 PM on July 21, 2008


This was a little before my time, unfortunately. I had to get my kicks setting off firecrackers in the Pine Barrens.
posted by backseatpilot at 5:25 PM on July 21, 2008


That link to the ride accidents roundup is one of the most depressing things I've ever read.
posted by davejay at 5:33 PM on July 21, 2008 [2 favorites]


Every summer I would beg to go. Every summer I got to go exactly once. Every summer I lost exactly 36 square inches of skin on the Alpine Slide.

This place was everything right and wrong about the 70s and 80s. Unbelievable fun, but without a thought as to how it would all play out over the years.

Now we're stuck with ex-traders on high blood pressure meds from the coke and Action Park regulars trying to use Glucosamine to repair those worked-over joints.

Thanks for the memories, though. It was truly an amazing place.
posted by JoshBerman at 5:36 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


Action Park was less a water park and more a complete insult to the evolutionary concept of self-preservation.
posted by jimmythefish at 5:39 PM on July 21, 2008 [2 favorites]


On the subject of the looping waterslide from one of the links above

The upside-down waterslide posted above is a shrine to a North Jersey childhood -- it's a totem pole of sorts. Anyone who truly knew what it was like to be ALIVE knew of its existence. No one has actually ever gone down that thing, as it was never open. The two popular myths surrounding it a) the first person who came down the waterslide drowned when he was stuck at the bottom and b) an alleged "test dummy" was sent down and came out decapitated. No matter -- it is just a true testament to the human spirit of what man is capable of doing. The people at Action Park actually believed -- to the point where they spent thousands of dollars in fiberglass costs -- they could defy every known rule of gravity and physics.

posted by poppo at 5:40 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


Just a weird confluence of posts today.
posted by Navelgazer


yeah that was intentional, at least on my part.
posted by concreteforest at 5:41 PM on July 21, 2008


Right on, and well done.
posted by Navelgazer at 5:44 PM on July 21, 2008


However if you read the comments of that link --this one-- it appears the loop WAS open at least for a short time. Several commenters give accounts.
posted by poppo at 5:44 PM on July 21, 2008


Don't worry New Jerseyans, we still have Great Adventure.
posted by amro at 5:48 PM on July 21, 2008


Sunday, August 1, 1982 - In an accident at Action Park in McAfee, New Jersey, a 27-year-old man was killed after being electrocuted while on the Kayak Experience ride.

Wow. That's some experience!
posted by grounded at 5:48 PM on July 21, 2008 [3 favorites]


That place was indeed absolutely legendary for its thrills and its very real danger. Jersey kids spoke of it in hushed and awe-filled tones. Excellent Jerseyana post!
posted by Miko at 5:52 PM on July 21, 2008


Man, these posts are putting me in a late-summer ankle-breakin' mood!
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 6:05 PM on July 21, 2008


When I was a kid we had a similar (though much, much smaller-scale) setup in Townsville, called Willows Water World. It was fun and I went a couple of times down the curvy-wurvy enclosed water slide and everything was jolly, but then some drongo at school ruined it for me by saying that a kid had been opened up from head to toe because people we slowing their descent about halfway down and shoving razor blades and stuff into the seams of the tube. Whether or not this happened I don't know and having a razor intersect rather than run parallel doesn't strike me as a great way to cut something open, but yeah. Anyway, a few years later some drunken JCU students broke in at night, climbed to the top of the slide, poured petrol down it, and then tossed in a match. So that was the end of that.
posted by turgid dahlia at 6:08 PM on July 21, 2008


I survived Action Park!
posted by Godbert at 6:15 PM on July 21, 2008


omg action park:

I saw Weinerville (old nickelodeon show, google it) there!! My dad got weinerized and everything (that sounds worse then it is). We had a backpack full of weinerville memorabilia that was stolen from the cubbies (dad, what were you thinking?) while we were getting violated by the slides. Somehow my dad got Mark Weiner's home phone number and he sent us some signed postcards saying "sorry for your loss". The backpack was found in the woods later, weinerville schwag intact. My dad's wallet was nearly empty though.

They had these utterly terrifying pictures of alpine slide injuries while you waited for your turn. Skin sloughed clean off. I don't know how they expected children to want to ride that thing after seeing those pictures. It was like looking at pictures of stds before a rendez-vous with a gloryhole. Years later, you had to sign a waiver before riding it (I think it applied to everything else at the park too)

They had these teenage makeout caves in the public swimming area too. You could go underwater and come up in a graffiti encrusted bubble that was like some ghetto underage playboy grotto.

Some kid took a dump in the pool at the end of the tube ride.

They had a slide that was only a few feet long that had a 20 ft drop under it. It caused you to smack on the water instead of sliding in. My dad had marks on his back for weeks.

I could have sworn that I saw the loop-de-loop slide open once, everyone coming out looked hurt.

Last thing: Does anyone remember the wierd monorail shuttle thing that went from the dry part of the park to the water park? It was a metal bench with no sides. the only thing that kept you in was a lap bar that any child could have easily fallen through (I almost did). I can't believe no one got hurt on that.
posted by Betty_effn_White at 6:16 PM on July 21, 2008 [8 favorites]


"State Road 94 ran through the middle of the park. Meaning there were only two ways to get to either side of Action Park -- either by running across a major state highway or by taking a train over a bridge to get to the other side. On an altar boy trip I wasn't allowed to go on, childhood friends Kevin Gallagher and Dave Kearns were riding the train on the bridge when it suddenly burst into flames. Dave escaped unharmed, Kevin was caught on the bridge, suffered a 1st degree burn and then fractured an ankle leaping off the bridge to safety."

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

I wish I was there back in the 80's wearing some neon green shorts and pink zinc oxide on my nose with some flipped up visor accentuating my feathered bangs.

This also reminds me, I always wanted to get hammered drunk at the island bar at my local water park and just float in the lazy river all afternoon long, with a large serving of dippin dots and a blended pina colada*.


*don't judge me.
posted by clearly at 6:21 PM on July 21, 2008 [2 favorites]


I was only at Action Park once (we made a family trip up there) and I really don't remember most of it, as I was young and not really paying attention, but what I do remember is the Colorado Rapids Ride or something where you got this big-ass tube at the bottom of the ride and then had to lug it up a hill to get to the start of the ride. My dad was none too happy about carrying that tube.
posted by Godbert at 6:23 PM on July 21, 2008


OMG x one zillion
posted by Monkeymoo at 6:27 PM on July 21, 2008


oh I am having some serious childhood flashbacks here!! the tarzan rope swing dropped you into the coldest water in the entire universe!!! *shivers*
posted by supermedusa at 6:35 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


For what its worth, I loved Action Park. I had an absolute blast there and left mostly intact each time.

That said, unlike the allegedly unsafe playgrounds I grew up with in the 1970's (currently being discussed in another FPP), yeah, I pretty much agree that Action Park probably deserved every lawsuit it received. Great fun, but arguably the most dangerous thing I did in my youth.

And I would include deliberate encounters with wild animals, attempts at creating make-shift explosives and regular attempts at crossing I-84 by foot at night on that list.
posted by Joey Michaels at 6:35 PM on July 21, 2008


It's still mostly there

The Gauley! That's the one where some man grabbed my wrist and kept me from sinking into the urine laced liquid abyss. The slide was designed alternating dips and whirlpools. It was set up so your tube would be knocked from the whirlpools down the dips by the tubist behind you. If you were a 60 lb ten year old and the person behind you was 200 lbs dude, it got pretty scary.
posted by Betty_effn_White at 6:37 PM on July 21, 2008


that's so weird, my sister used to work at Mountain Creek a few years back. I'm always amazed when others know of these bizarre NoJer [yes--I just made that up!] artifacts
posted by supermedusa at 6:38 PM on July 21, 2008


OT: What with the previous posts and this one, you guys have me thinking about skateparks from the late 1970s... the local one was quite the injury factory.
posted by Ron Thanagar at 6:44 PM on July 21, 2008


This place was a strange combination of totally fucking insane and totally fucking awesome. My personal favorite ride was the water slide where, at the end, you shot out of a blind tunnel, at high speed, from maybe fifteen feet above the surface of a little grotto pool where other kids were swimming.

You never knew who you were going to land on, until after you had knocked them unconscious and to the bottom of the pool.
posted by Flunkie at 6:57 PM on July 21, 2008


I wonder if Mr. Show's "Thrill World" was based on this place....
posted by Tbola at 7:00 PM on July 21, 2008


Indescribably awesome. I would've loved to have had something like this as a kid. The waterparks of my youth were fortified plastic, rounded-corner affairs where you really had to go out of your way to hurt yourself. The idea that you could maim yourself or even die just using the attractions as they were intended would've really heightened the thrill. Which makes me wonder whether it might've been part of Action Park's marketing strategy to brand itself as the scariest, deadliest amusement part in the Tri-State area. It obviously didn't work out for them in the end, but a little casual negligence here and there in the design and upkeep process surely gave them a boost.
posted by decoherence at 7:15 PM on July 21, 2008


Oh, Jeez, it sounded like three parts awesome and one part batshitinsane. *sniff*
posted by maxwelton at 7:16 PM on July 21, 2008


Wow ... Action Fucking Park. This is exactly why we NJsians (wherever we may wind up) are the way we are. And proud of it, fuckin' aye!
posted by ElvisJesus at 7:17 PM on July 21, 2008


Oh yeah...the alpine slide was the best. Especially if you got one of the extra-slidey carts. I remember getting one that was so good I got whiplash when I hit the tires at the end. Also props to supermedusa - I didn't remember the Tarzan swing until now but damn that was cold.

I didn't do the loop waterslide as my dad - who would encourage me to do pretty much any insane sporting activity known to man - thought it might be a bit of a bad idea.
posted by true at 7:23 PM on July 21, 2008


We moved from NJ only a year after it opened, but I swear that I still remember the TV ads for this place. Too bad my parents never took me there. It looks insaaaaayne!
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 7:29 PM on July 21, 2008


Mountain Creek also inherited at least an ounce or two of skin I left in that park.
posted by JaredSeth at 7:35 PM on July 21, 2008


The two popular myths surrounding it a) the first person who came down the waterslide drowned when he was stuck at the bottom and b) an alleged "test dummy" was sent down and came out decapitated.

That's the rumor we used to talk about when we saw that thing while skiing there (Vernon Valley/Great Gorge). I never went to the water park, because those "attractions" looked so darn scary.
posted by inigo2 at 7:39 PM on July 21, 2008


"State Road 94 ran through the middle of the park. Meaning there were only two ways to get to either side of Action Park -- either by running across a major state highway or by taking a train over a bridge to get to the other side. On an altar boy trip I wasn't allowed to go on, childhood friends Kevin Gallagher and Dave Kearns were riding the train on the bridge when it suddenly burst into flames. Dave escaped unharmed, Kevin was caught on the bridge, suffered a 1st degree burn and then fractured an ankle leaping off the bridge to safety."

I'm sorry but that's hilarious. I imagine the conversation going something like this:
Kid: "How do we get to the other side?"
Employee: "Well, you can either run across this busy highway or get on board the train of terror, which may or may not explode at any time. So, you've got options."
posted by puke & cry at 7:47 PM on July 21, 2008 [4 favorites]


Waterslide with 360 degree loop (Youtube link, from German TV). "This waterslide cost 500 thousand Euro, but no one knows yet if it really works." Presumably they found out while filming this video . . .
posted by flug at 7:56 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


Overheard at the top of the Action Park Alpine Slide:

Boy: Why do we have to cross our legs on the way down?
Female Attendant: So that some day, you can be a daddy.
posted by deanc at 8:25 PM on July 21, 2008 [3 favorites]


Random ActionPark memories...
-my friend who had multiple undamaged wristbands (barely stretched!)and thus always went in for free
-an aquaintance who resold coin lockers on busy days
-the fear that the water was in fact urine to a subtantial degree
-the bus from newark that had to be searched and its passengers relieved of many other parkgoers wallets, purses and walkmen

Christ! So many people from where I grew up here. I miss it sometimes.

Now I need a birch beer and a slice.
posted by codswallop at 9:11 PM on July 21, 2008


This is pretty wimpy compared to the horrors of Action Park, but when I was a kid we'd sometimes camp at Rock Glen, which had (it might still be there; I haven't been there in years) a fairly ordinary water slide...ordinary aside from the fact that the sections of the slide had been cheaply/incompetently welded together so that every weld had a slightly raised/jagged edge that had begun to rust. If you spent an afternoon sliding down it you'd be scraped and sometimes bleeding by the end of the day. It was tetanus-riffic!
posted by The Card Cheat at 9:45 PM on July 21, 2008


You can't handle the fun.
posted by caddis at 10:14 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


Wow I miss Action Park. Even the mini-golf was this crazily-landscaped course planted on the side of a steep hill.

The sad secret of the Alpine Slide was that you get a crazy, awesome, death-defying, inches from hurtling off the track and dropping 25 feet into rocks and thorn bushes, mind-bending-thrill-ride....once...ever. Every single other time you went you'd go 20 feet and crash into some fat mom going 5 miles an hour and pray you didn't get wiplash as every kid behind you plowed into the growing train of slowness.

And I credit the urine/water blend for my relatively strong germ resistance today.
posted by jalexei at 10:25 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


the tarzan rope swing dropped you into the coldest water in the entire universe!!! *shivers*

In 1984, a fatal heart attack suffered by one visitor was unofficially believed to have been triggered by the shock of the cold water in the pool beneath the Tarzan Swing.
posted by concreteforest at 10:33 PM on July 21, 2008


Jesus, Alpine Slide. It was like those STREETS OF DEATH videos they used to make you watch in high school driver's ed. Really disgusting stuff. But what are you going to do at that point? Beg them to let you ride the ski lift back down while everyone points and mocks you? So you climb on some rusty piece of shit that slides all over the place with the loosest "steering" and brakes you can imagine and just pray not to die. Pray like your life depended on it, which it might have.

Good times.
posted by Justinian at 10:45 PM on July 21, 2008


holy crap, what a great post. i loved action park (jersey kid here) even though i only got to go twice before it closed. it is the only theme park that has made me truly fear for my life.

also i fell the fuck off the tarzan rope thing so fast the first time i swung on it....i came up from the water to such resounding jeers that i would have never forgiven myself for not trying again. a true story of inspiration. i managed to hang on for at least 2 seconds longer the next time. thank you, traction park.
posted by capnsue at 10:55 PM on July 21, 2008


Action Park. I think I used up my lifetime quota of stupid within my first ten minutes there. I'm still gobsmacked at how much that place ruled.

Betty_effn_White: I remember that waterslide with the 20-foot drop. It was right next to a conventional waterslide that went all the way down to the same pool. There were two lines, and you couldn't really see the course of the slide from where it started. I got in the short line. Went in foot-first, and got a nosebleed. Rock.
posted by phooky at 11:31 PM on July 21, 2008


"It didn't help when a bus crashed on its way to the park in 1992, killing five would-be park attendees."

That crazy ride where short-attention-span apes steer two-ton lumps of metal at inhuman speeds isn't still going, right?

The actual park sounds very roughly like what we got up to in the country, where we had a real river, except for the booze and drugs...
posted by alasdair at 11:58 PM on July 21, 2008


Waterslide with 360 degree loop (Youtube link, from German TV).

I love that slide starts with the person standing on a trap door that suddenly gives way into a vertical plummet. Reminded me of the Saddam Hussein execution video.
posted by longsleeves at 11:58 PM on July 21, 2008 [1 favorite]


"State Road 94 ran through the middle of the park. Meaning there were only two ways to get to either side of Action Park -- either by running across a major state highway or by taking a train over a bridge to get to the other side. On an altar boy trip I wasn't allowed to go on, childhood friends Kevin Gallagher and Dave Kearns were riding the train on the bridge when it suddenly burst into flames. Dave escaped unharmed, Kevin was caught on the bridge, suffered a 1st degree burn and then fractured an ankle leaping off the bridge to safety."

That is about the most perfect summary of Action Park ever. Cool stuff operated on the margins so as to be life-threatening.

I've spent 2 weeks just about every year of my life at the ocean, in the surf, and consider myself a pretty strong swimmer in rough conditions. At least above-average. Goddamn if the wave pool at Action Park didn't scare the piss out of me the one time I went there. Considering most everybody else there seemed to be city kids, with probably no experience in anything choppier than a public pool or one of the mellow NYC/LI beaches, it's amazing that thing didn't take more lives (it did kill two.)

And the Alpine Slide -- I dunno, there are Alpine Slides all over the place and I'd been on a lot of them but there was definitely something sinister about the one at Action Park. It's certainly the only one that left me with road rash from scraping random body parts on the concrete trough while whipping around the curves half-on, half-off the track. And to add insult to injury, that son-of-a-bitch took my genuine Consolidated Freightways hat. It's probably still on the side of the mountain somewhere.

The (lack of) attention to safety carried over to the winter. I used to love night skiing at Vernon Valley because at the time (late '80s) it was the only place I knew of where snowboarders pretty much had free reign to do whatever they wanted (or maybe there were rules with lax enforcement -- I don't know.) The boarders would go up there and build jumps and troughs and such and we immortal college-aged skiiers (courage enhanced by the beers served at the since-burned-down base lodge) would hit 'em all, and generally not get too hurt. Made what was a so-so hill with grindingly-slow lifts kind of a blast -- and close to home to boot. Though it was the only place I've ever wound up off the trail, upside-down (after hitting a 'boarder bump, of course) wondering if I'd ever make it out alive. Never been swallowed by a tree well in all my years of backcountry but almost got killed at Vernon Valley. Yeah, that's pretty Action Park.

Damn, I miss that place.
posted by Opposite George at 12:14 AM on July 22, 2008 [1 favorite]


I've never been to this park, but I remember one that was equally nuts in the mid-eighties, somewhere in North Carolina. It had insane slides that looked so similar to this that my mother would never let me ride. Does anyone know which one I mean? (would have been close to or somewhere in Raleigh).
posted by dabitch at 3:07 AM on July 22, 2008


Sorry. I don't believe a word of it. If The Boss didn't make a song about it, it didn't happen.
posted by Goofyy at 4:29 AM on July 22, 2008 [1 favorite]



Sorry. I don't believe a word of it. If The Boss didn't make a song about it, it didn't happen.


Of course he did:

Baby this (park) rips the bones from your back
Its a death trap, its a suicide rap
We gotta get out while were young
`cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run
posted by ElvisJesus at 5:19 AM on July 22, 2008 [2 favorites]


If The Boss didn't make a song about it, it didn't happen.

It's a little bit out of his territory, and in his young and crazy days there were many more options for dangerous amusement much closer to home than there were in the 80s.
posted by Miko at 5:43 AM on July 22, 2008 [1 favorite]


...you know, right there in Asbury Park:

you know, that tilt-a-whirl down on the south beach drag
I got on it last night and my shirt got caught
And that Joey kept me spinnin' I didn't think I'd ever get off

posted by Miko at 5:47 AM on July 22, 2008


I used to beg my mom to take me to Action Park and she never did. Now I think I need to call her up and thank her.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 5:48 AM on July 22, 2008


That sounds like an awesome place. This is where we go now.
posted by winks007 at 6:43 AM on July 22, 2008


I can't remember a time walking into that park without seeing someone holding a bloody rag to their head. Nothing like a day of laughter, screams and sirens to make you appreciate life again.

I truly believe this Mr. Show sketch was based on Action Park.
posted by any major dude at 7:08 AM on July 22, 2008 [1 favorite]


I loved action park in my teens and early 20's - most summers I made the trip at least once. The foam rubber coated river runs were the best thing in the park - a mini mountain with 3-4 different river runs which you could take in either single tubes or large 4 (6?) person tubes. There were visits where I spent my whole day on those tubes. I survived mostly intact despite all my visits. My favorite 'injury' came from the 3 story vertical water slide. Early 20's, more than a little loaded, my buddy and I didn't hear the instructions from the attendant to keep our legs crossed on the way down, or maybe he forgot to tell us. Few things will get you crossing your legs quicker than water shooting into your groin as you free fall from ~3 stories up. I came off that ride shrieking in pain and realized that water had shot right into me, the world's least expected enema. Best part was looking over at my friend and realizing the same thing had happened to him, and the two of us, doubled over in discomfort, waddled off in desperate search of a rest room.

Gross, I know. It was more than 20 years ago and time heals all wounds. My friends and I nicknamed the park action enema after that, which has gotten me a few strange looks over the years.

Oh, and the go carts were awesome. Their policy of giving you a free lap if you could catch up to the person in front of you or beat the current fastest lap time meant everyone was incented to drive like a lunatic. Those karts were built to move and you could get them in truly impressive powerslides.
posted by Tempus67 at 7:13 AM on July 22, 2008 [5 favorites]


This has to be one of my all time favorite metafilter threads. Thank you all.
posted by Divine_Wino at 7:41 AM on July 22, 2008


Wow, this brings back memories.

I remember being a little disappointed when Trac, er Action Park closed down... but Mountain Creek was much, MUCH better.

And not as deadly. And has great food.
posted by ShawnStruck at 7:48 AM on July 22, 2008


MetaFilter: a complete insult to the evolutionary concept of self-preservation.

Eh, maybe not.
posted by Foosnark at 8:11 AM on July 22, 2008


OMFG the FUNNEST place in the tri-state area in the 1980s. AP was pure proof that how enjoyable something is is often directly proportional to the risk of being maimed or killed. I remember the story of how someone got sucked into the turbines in the deep end of the big wave pool and sushi-ed.

Ah, the screaming tarzan swing into the frigid rocky pool...and the tube-slide into the same pool, pitch dark in that slippery padded tunnel.

...the frustration of being caught behind some slow-ass MF on the alpine slide

..and the mat-slide hill where ever track got progressively steeper and faster, until the final ones where each bump tossed you in the air

...and the tennis-ball-firing tanks in the dry part of the park, and the "formula" racing cars we were never old enough to drive (but we dreamed, oh yes we dreamed)
posted by gottabefunky at 10:41 AM on July 22, 2008


I would have been there when I was about 12, having grown up in Philadelphia. I only have a snapshot of a memory of the place, but it's a snapshot of my 10 year old cousin, completely in the air with limbs splayed, between the two Alpine Slide tracks, about to land immediately in front of me after being rear-ended and ejected by his 12 year old sister. He actually rolled in front of my cart, log-style, before I finally ran him over...

(I wish I remember what happened afterwards, mainly because his parents were the ones who, after he came back completely covered in road rash after an ill-advised skateboarding trip, told him chlorine was good for cuts and threw him into the deep end of their pool. I can still hear the screams...)
posted by zap rowsdower at 1:05 PM on July 22, 2008 [1 favorite]


"The World's Least Expected Enema" is the best band name ever. God, I love this thread.
posted by Space Kitty at 2:55 PM on July 22, 2008


"The World's Least Expected Enema"

FWIW, keeping your ankles crossed didn't help much.
posted by Opposite George at 5:12 PM on July 22, 2008


Infamous for its gravity-and-friction-defying looping waterslide and beer gardens

Any place that has beer gardens for kids is A-OK in my books.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:24 PM on July 22, 2008


Action Park totally rocked. There were medium-high faux cliffs you could jump off, there was surf hill where you were certain to get hurt, if not injured, and there were mermaids all over the joint.

I miss you, Action Park!
posted by Mister_A at 6:59 AM on July 25, 2008


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