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August 4, 2008 8:33 PM   Subscribe

The BBQ Song
posted by konolia (46 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
Hey. I was born and raised in Alabama, and I NEVER saw, and NEVER heard of white barbecue sauce made outta mayonnaise. These North Carolinians have besmirched the proud reputation and noble tradition of fine barbecue in Alabama, and for this I cannot forgive them.

And remember, y'all, when in Birmingham, be sure and stop by Full Moon Barbecue*. Ask 'em for mayonnaise, though, and they might just pull out the shotgun from under the register.

* "Coming Soon to Fultondale!"
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:58 PM on August 4, 2008


Oh my goodness I'm very hungry allofasudden.

I was just in Puerto Rico, Konolia, in Ricon which is kind of out of the way and we (me and my wife and kid) were desperate hungry and cruising around for lunch and not much is going on in August in Ricon, but there is a crazy little BBQ restaurant, just a shack really, called (in Spanish) the Pig from the Sky (they also have the freshest fish in Ricon) there and we rolled in and had the best freshest fish in the world and so we decided to go back on our last day and I was like, dammit, I ain't skipping some BBQ for fish, even in the Red Snapper capital of the world, so I had a really great meal of smoked chopped pork shoulder with a proper spicy red sauce (not Carolina style but still magical) and a mess of pork and beans and in true regional style they were basically Puerto Rican red beans in the same smokey sauce, pretty good but weird. Point being, the South is for sure the boss of BBQ, but y'all shouldn't sleep. Also, wow, I'm super hungry.
posted by Divine_Wino at 8:58 PM on August 4, 2008


More detail - though people who study these things are starting to feel that the proliferation of barbecue over the last ten, fifteen years has really broken down the patterns of regional variation. You can get beef brisket in Texas, but you can easily also find pork butt in sweet barbecue sauce.

Doesn't matter, really. It's one of the nation's most awesome foods no matter how you do it.
posted by Miko at 8:59 PM on August 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Hey. I was born and raised in Alabama, and I NEVER saw, and NEVER heard of white barbecue sauce made outta mayonnaise

Thank God. I was seriously worried about you Alabamians there for awhile.
posted by konolia at 9:01 PM on August 4, 2008


And any good barbecue thread deserves a link to the Southern Foodways Alliance's BBQ Oral History Project.
posted by Miko at 9:02 PM on August 4, 2008


Was it just me or was the silhouette they used for "Florida" actually California? I'm mighty amused that Florida isn't considered the south... but, unsurprised. It is mostly old folks from the Boston-NYC-DC megalopolis and people who have come down to waste their money at theme parks. (excluding people who like to go to the Salvador Dali museum.

I am now very hungry though.
posted by Sam.Burdick at 9:03 PM on August 4, 2008


I'm mighty amused that Florida isn't considered the south... but, unsurprised.

Doubly funny because they included Texas without even blinking, but questioned Florida's Southern cred. Florida has always seemed undeniably Southern to me, but there are a lot of Texans who don't really think of Texas as a Southern state.
posted by Miko at 9:05 PM on August 4, 2008


Sauce regions of North and South Carolina.
posted by Knappster at 9:10 PM on August 4, 2008


From the same series, some of this guy's food art is amusing. Check out the cornflakes!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:11 PM on August 4, 2008


And remember, y'all, when in Birmingham, be sure and stop by Full Moon Barbecue

On the way from Enterprise, AL to Manchester, TN last year, we were starving by the time we got to Birmingham, and I couldn't wait to get some BBQ in me. We followed a billboard, I can't remember which place it was for, but once we got off the interstate, we couldn't find it anyhow. Your southern cities don't make any sense to this Yankee, and I have successfully navigated--wit a motor vehicle--Boston, New York, and, worst by far, Vienna.

We got tired of driving through the rough parts of town looking for smoke, and finally came upon Full Moon. Maybe I was just hungry, but damn, that was some good BBQ.

And it might be blasphemous, but we've got some reasonably good BBQ up here, too. Might be the most smoke I've ever tasted in a piece of meat.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:12 PM on August 4, 2008


Oh, man, Carolina BBQ is THE hardest to find on the west coast. On the other hand, we get texas, 'bama, caribbean, Louisiana... Naturally my folks live in NC, so it's the one style I'd really, really love to see over here, like.


mmmm
posted by mwhybark at 9:16 PM on August 4, 2008


Glad you found the Full Moon, uncleozzy. I try to make it over there at least once whenever I'm back in the 'ham for a visit. But this:

Your southern cities don't make any sense to this Yankee, and I have successfully navigated--wit a motor vehicle--Boston, New York, and, worst by far, Vienna.

Huh? Man, downtown B'ham is a grid. Numbered, straight criss-crossed streets and avenues, essentially. Like Manhattan. You sure you hadn't had a little bit of moonshine, or summa that Alabama homegrown? Cause that'll throw off your sense of direction, for sure.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:21 PM on August 4, 2008


Eastern North Carolina barbecue rules. With cole slaw and hush puppies, fit for a last meal! (Don't forget the sweet tea!)
posted by konolia at 9:24 PM on August 4, 2008


Great song, but those are some blunt generalizations about each state. I guess blunt generalizations about Southern BBQ are unavoidable for a 3-minute song. I was raised in Arkansas, and a 2-minute walk from my house was--and still is--the best damn BBQ in the world. A favorite place of Bill Clinton's, both now and back when he was a high school student. The heavenly sauce is both sweet and spicy.
posted by zardoz at 9:29 PM on August 4, 2008


How could they forget Missouri? We are a bit of every region...and KC BBQ is somewhat famous...

I make a different BBQ sauce every time, why get stuck in a rut.

Admittedly, it usually is a sweet fruit pureed with something spicy.
posted by schyler523 at 9:44 PM on August 4, 2008


The white barbecue sauce. I've never met anyone from Alabama who has heard of it.
posted by milkrate at 9:48 PM on August 4, 2008


Florida not a Southern state? Please.
posted by LoriFLA at 9:49 PM on August 4, 2008


This seems like a good opportunity to shamelessly plug my friend Will's new book, Holy Smoke. I helped him conduct some of the interviews, which meant traveling all across North Carolina and eating a lot of BBQ. Good work if you can get it.
posted by Rangeboy at 9:53 PM on August 4, 2008


Doubly funny because they included Texas without even blinking, but questioned Florida's Southern cred.

Texas did secede with the South, and it is filled with Southerners.

They did leave out Oklahoma and its barbeque bologna, part of every Oklahoma school lunch rotation. Probably a good thing.
posted by dw at 10:14 PM on August 4, 2008


That was cute.

Didja know that the term 'barbeque' derives from the Spanish 'barbacoa', which describes a structure designed for drying or roasting meat?

Oh man, lamb steak BBQ, yum! That's Hell's Kitchen rooftop style on a cheap grill. Is it BBQ blasphemy to include beer can chicken in the list of BBQ faves? Delish!

Rhett and Link are silly fun. I like their Pimp My Stroller song too.
posted by nickyskye at 10:14 PM on August 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


We tend to take our BBQ pretty seriously here in Texas...
posted by jim in austin at 10:17 PM on August 4, 2008


I'm hungry.
posted by vertigo25 at 10:20 PM on August 4, 2008


What a coincidence - I picked up some good barbecue for dinner tonight. Mmm... brisket!
posted by ooga_booga at 10:56 PM on August 4, 2008


Aw, man. It's 11:00 at night over here, and it is in no way an appropriate time to wish the barbecue stand in downtown Burbank were open right now.
posted by katillathehun at 11:18 PM on August 4, 2008


Well it may upset people but there is white BBQ sauce in AL. Decatur, AL to be exact. I am from Montgomery and remember it in a grocery store. Seems to be primarily in north AL.

The brand I saw - Big Bob Gibson BBQ Sauce
posted by LeeinAZ at 11:40 PM on August 4, 2008


Florida not a Southern state? Please.

Florida is a northern colony. The south ends in Waycross.

I am a weirdo and do not want ANY sweetness in my BBQ. Not sure what region that puts me in, but I don't worry about it too much - My Weber Smoky Mountain and I make brisket, pulled pork, lamb and occasionally chicken.

The sauce is hot and vinegary. There is no brown sugar in my home. Nor any sugar.

Sweet is for ice cream.
posted by OneOliveShort at 11:40 PM on August 4, 2008


...there are a lot of Texans who don't really think of Texas as a Southern state.

There are a lot of Texans who think Texas is a whole 'nother country.

A country where barbecue is top serious business. A country where they cherish and respect the meats. A country where I found like-minded souls who also believe sweet sticky barbecue sauce to be an abomination.
posted by louche mustachio at 12:54 AM on August 5, 2008


I know from experience that the panhandle of Florida is most definitely the South, but from about Ocala down it becomes New Jersey.
posted by wsg at 1:50 AM on August 5, 2008 [2 favorites]


Viral ad for Alka-Seltzer notwithstanding, that was fun. But no love for Virginia? Last year, Buz Grossberg threw down with Bobby Flay and completely smoked his ass.
posted by emelenjr at 4:39 AM on August 5, 2008


Miko: More detail

Those bastards ripped all that text off from a Wikipedia article I originally created, without attribution.
posted by grouse at 5:09 AM on August 5, 2008


grouse: "Those bastards ripped all that text off from a Wikipedia article I originally created, without attribution."

LOL - I guess Alka-Seltzer doesn't want a GNU license scroll at the end.
posted by stbalbach at 5:22 AM on August 5, 2008


There is no brown sugar in my home. Nor any sugar.

Now you're just making me sad.
posted by nola at 5:27 AM on August 5, 2008 [3 favorites]


You sure you hadn't had a little bit of moonshine, or summa that Alabama homegrown?

Well, I may have been addled by hunger and daydreams of little piggies dancing before my very eyes.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:30 AM on August 5, 2008


That was all kinds of awesome!! And they are so right about GA!! We can't decide!! We like it all!

Having BBQ for lunch. Great post!!
posted by pearlybob at 5:33 AM on August 5, 2008


I know from experience that the panhandle of Florida is most definitely the South, but from about Ocala down it becomes New Jersey

Having lived in Florida myself (both in Sarasota and Pensacola) I can affirm that the Panhandle is really Alabama in disguise and the rest of the state (with the exception of the interior parts, far from the beaches) is TOTALLY transplanted Yankee. Sarasota was about as Southern as Noo Yawk.
posted by konolia at 5:34 AM on August 5, 2008


Another anecdote about white barbecue sauce: my mom's brother, while originally from Southern California by way of the Chicago area, married a woman from Alabama and lived in Huntsville for nigh on a decade. He mastered the art of smoking pork butt and serves it with two, traditionally Alabama sauces...a white, mayonnaise-based sauce and a spicy, vinegar-based sauce. They are both delicious.

(I also note that Huntsville is very close to Decatur, lending support to the idea that it's a Northern AL thing.)
posted by nonmerci at 5:55 AM on August 5, 2008


I-4 divides Florida That Is In The South from Yankeeland Florida.

Clearly konolia has never been to Jacksonville, which is both coastal and full of shitkicking rednecks and drunk Navy pinheads.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:13 AM on August 5, 2008


I grew up in Southern Tennessee, and lived in Eastern Mississippi and Northern Alabama. I know of white barbecue sauce only because I specifically sought it out. It is the albino buffalo of sauce, found only by madmen who seek such things. It's worth the trip.
posted by 1f2frfbf at 7:16 AM on August 5, 2008


My aunt and uncle lived in Jacksonville for years. My main impression of Jacksonville is that it is hell to drive thru and smells like paper mills. (Let's just lump it in with the panhandle, 'k?)

OTOH I have been below I-4 in rural Florida and can attest that there is definitely southern redneckiness to be found.
posted by konolia at 7:28 AM on August 5, 2008


I don't think of Virginia as a state with a strong BBQ identity, really. Even if you factor out Northern Virginia*, I can think of only 3 or 4 really good BBQ places in the state, and I've eaten at a lot more. They were all disparate without a common taste theme or they were Carolina-style (or other imported geographic style).

*I walked up to a guy serving BBQ under a sign called "Carolina Brothers BBQ" in NoVa once and asked "Western or Eastern" and then added grudgingly, "or South?" and the guy looked at me as if I had three heads and was talking in tongues. I got the BBQ against my better judgment, which still brings the crappiness of the BBQ up every time I get BBQ someplace out of context.
posted by julen at 9:22 AM on August 5, 2008


This was posted just in time for the annual XIT Rodeo and Reunion, home of the worlds largest free barbecue, for all you folks near the Texas panhandle!
posted by TedW at 9:45 AM on August 5, 2008


You can find white sauce in Birmingham (Cahaba Heights) at Miss Myra's Pit Barbecue. I've never eaten there personally but it's been in Birmingham for 20+ years.
posted by robtf3 at 10:56 AM on August 5, 2008 [1 favorite]


I love in a town on Long Island that somehow supports three very decent BBQ joints. Weirdly delcious.
posted by ericbop at 11:52 AM on August 5, 2008


Gonna have to go try it next time I'm there. Thanks!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:55 PM on August 5, 2008


(The Cahaba Heights whitesauce place, that is...)
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:56 PM on August 5, 2008


California has isolated pockets of real BBQ ≠ grilling. My favorite so far is the difficult to find, only open 4 days a week Drooling Dog BBQ in Colfax. I stumbled across it when I got off the freeway to find a bathroom and my sniffer detected the wafting aroma of smoked meat. I followed the trail like a drooling bloodhound, and when I saw four smokers on trailers parked out front I knew I'd struck gold. Meat, fixin's, desserts and drinks all awesome. There may be better BBQ in CA, but I haven't found it.
posted by BrotherCaine at 11:41 PM on August 5, 2008


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