OMG DOUBLE DROP!!!
August 6, 2008 4:38 PM   Subscribe

This gives a new meaning to the term "Amen Break." (SLYT)
posted by empath (18 comments total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: that you actually added the 'lolxtians' tag yourself is probably not a great sign -- cortex



 
Save it for digg.
posted by Wanderlust88 at 4:43 PM on August 6, 2008


No, don't bother.
posted by Bathtub Bobsled at 4:46 PM on August 6, 2008


This is a bad post and you should feel bad.
posted by GuyZero at 4:46 PM on August 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


Meh, they can't all be gold. I laughed, though.
posted by empath at 4:48 PM on August 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


Crap video is crap.
posted by C.Batt at 4:51 PM on August 6, 2008


Religion as orgy:
We went forward a few more yards and began to see the audience. It was seated on benches ranged round the preacher in a circle. Behind him sat a row of elders, men and women. In front were the younger folk. We kept on cautiously, and individuals rose out of the ghostly gloom. A young mother sat suckling her baby, rocking as the preacher paced up and down. Two scared little girls hugged each other, their pigtails down their backs. An immensely huge mountain woman, in a gingham dress cut in one piece, rolled on her heels at every "Glory to God." To one side, but half visible, was what appeared to be a bed. We found out afterward that two babies were asleep upon it.

The preacher stopped at last and there arose out of the darkness a woman with her hair pulled back into a little tight knot. She began so quietly that we couldn't hear what she said, but soon her voice rose resonantly and we could follow her. She was denouncing the reading of books. Some wandering book agent, it appeared, had come to her cabin and tried to sell her a specimen of his wares. She refused to touch it. Why, indeed, read a book? If what was in it was true then everything in it was already in the Bible. If it was false then reading it would imperil the soul. Her syllogism complete, she sat down.

There followed a hymn, led by a somewhat fat brother wearing silver-rimmed country spectacles. It droned on for half a dozen stanzas, and then the first speaker resumed the floor. He argued that the gift of tongues was real and that education was a snare. Once his children could read the Bible, he said, they had enough. Beyond lay only infidelity and damnation. Sin stalked the cities. Dayton itself was a Sodom. Even Morgantown had begun to forget God. He sat down, and the female aurochs in gingham got up.

She began quietly, but was soon leaping and roaring, and it was hard to follow her. Under cover of the turmoil we sneaked a bit closer. A couple of other discourses followed, and there were two or three hymns. Suddenly a change of mood began to make itself felt. The last hymn ran longer than the others and dropped gradually into a monotonous, unintelligible chant. The leader beat time with his book. The faithful broke out with exultations. When the singing ended there was a brief palaver that we could not hear and two of the men moved a bench into the circle of light directly under the flambeaux. Then a half-grown girl emerged from the darkness and threw herself upon it. We noticed with astonishment that she had bobbed hair. "This sister," said the leader, "has asked for prayers." We moved a bit closer. We could now see faces plainly and hear every word.

What followed quickly reached such heights of barbaric grotesquerie that it was hard to believe it real. At a signal all the faithful crowded up the bench and began to pray -- not in unison but each for himself. At another they all fell on their knees, their arms over the penitent. The leader kneeled, facing us, his head alternately thrown back dramatically or buried in his hands. Words spouted from his lips like bullets from a machine gun -- appeals to God to pull the penitent back out of hell, defiances of the powers and principalities of the air, a vast impassioned jargon of apocalyptic texts. Suddenly he rose to his feet, threw back his head and began to speak in tongues -- blub-blub-blub, gurgle-gurgle-gurgle. His voice rose to a higher register. The climax was a shrill, inarticulate squawk, like that of a man throttled. He fell headlong across the pyramid of supplicants.

A comic scene? Somehow, no. The poor half wits were too horribly in earnest. It was like peeping through a knothole at the writhings of a people in pain. From the squirming and jabbering mass a young woman gradually detached herself -- a woman not uncomely, with a pathetic home-made cap on her head. Her head jerked back, the veins of her neck swelled, and her fists went to her throat as if she were fighting for breath. She bent backward until she was like half of a hoop. Then she suddenly snapped forward. We caught a flash of the whites of her eyes. Presently her whole body began to be convulsed -- great convulsions that began at the shoulders and ended at the hips. She would leap to her feet, thrust her arms in air and then hurl herself upon the heap. Her praying flattened out into a mere delirious caterwauling, like that of a tomcat on a petting party.
HL Mencken, reporting on the Scopes "Monkey" Trial and its attendant carnival of buncombe, in The Baltimore Evening Sun, July 13, 1925
posted by orthogonality at 4:52 PM on August 6, 2008 [5 favorites]


Waiting for someone to report on the sincerity of this crew.
posted by StickyCarpet at 4:52 PM on August 6, 2008


Meh, they can't all be gold. I laughed, though.

They can't all be gold, but they don't have to be crap...
posted by pupdog at 5:01 PM on August 6, 2008


Shit Sandwich. Seriously.
posted by dbiedny at 5:02 PM on August 6, 2008


Not as good as this.
posted by puke & cry at 5:05 PM on August 6, 2008


Oddly enough, the Messiah remix being played here doesn't even use the Amen break.
posted by Uncle Ira at 5:05 PM on August 6, 2008


This will BOOM-BOOM-POW-BOOM-BA-DOOM-BA-POW...
posted by Smart Dalek at 5:06 PM on August 6, 2008


More ... cowbell ... ?
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 5:09 PM on August 6, 2008


For some reason, this makes me really sad. I have a feeling like I should be laughing, but these folks are just a little to sincere in their insanity. Pointing and laughing seems cruel.

Maybe it is that I'm from West Virginia and I have seen this stuff for real. (if you care, it was part of what made me an athiest)
posted by poe at 5:10 PM on August 6, 2008 [1 favorite]


So you think you can dance, huh?
posted by Foci for Analysis at 5:12 PM on August 6, 2008


I guess they weren't actually listening to that music?

this is funnier
posted by Citizen Premier at 5:12 PM on August 6, 2008


Well I guess it would be nice
If I could touch your body
I know not everybody
Has got a body like you

But I've got to think twice
Before I give my heart away
And I know all the games you play
Because I play them too

Oh but I
Need some time off from that emotion
Time to pick my heart up off the floor
And when that love comes down
Without devotion
Well it takes a strong man baby
But I'm showing you the door

'Cause I gotta have faith...

Baby
I know you're asking me to stay
Say please, please, please, don't go away
You say I'm giving you the blues
Maybe
You mean every word you say
Can't help but think of yesterday
And another who tied me down to loverboy rules

Before this river
Becomes an ocean
Before you throw my heart back on the floor
Oh baby I reconsider
My foolish notion
Well I need someone to hold me
But I'll wait for something more

'Cause I gotta have faith...

--George Michael
posted by netbros at 5:23 PM on August 6, 2008


Wevs, haters. That was bloody funny.
posted by jack_mo at 5:33 PM on August 6, 2008


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