Comments on: Before I die I want to make a cool polaroid project.

Before I die I want to make a cool polaroid project.

Lutoslawski — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:22:08 -0800

Before I die I want to...

By: norabarnacl3

norabarnacl3 — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:25:34 -0800

Dear trendy webdesigners: until there is an analogous page up/down key for sideways scrolling, dont do it, thanks.

By: jayder

jayder — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:29:38 -0800

What a surprise, they're selling a book.

By: philip-random

philip-random — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:39:36 -0800

Yeah, this is instantly annoying. I'm still waiting for my coffee to brew so I don't have the words to express myself yet: something to do with hating cute ideas in the name of [capital A] Art ... while wedding receptions in Afghanistan are getting bombed to hell by our side, by mistake, and it barely makes the papers.

By: Nelson

Nelson — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:43:19 -0800

Before I die I want to snark on someone's stupid photo book project.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:43:42 -0800

Many of these people haven't really thought about what they want to do before they die. C'mon. Visit Ireland? Have a baby? Learn harmonica? Those are short-term goals. With proper planning, a lot of these can be accomplished in a year to three years. You have your whole life ahead of you, people! Challenge your desires! Think long-term! Think impossible, and then strive to make it possible! Before I die, I want to have written one song that is considered a standard, won the Pulitzer, spent at least a solid year just driving around America, worked with eighteen Academy award winners (one down), been on the NY Times bestseller list, found 50,000,000 fans, created a classic cocktail, and become a cult figure. Hell, I hope to achieve this by the age 50.

By: shoebox

shoebox — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:44:10 -0800

*curses HP for not putting in a horizontal scroll bar on their laptops* *curses Web designers for not knowing that HP doesn't put in a horizontal scroll bar on their laptops*

By: dixie flatline

dixie flatline — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:45:28 -0800

I don't know, this one was pretty funny: "Before I die: I would much like to have 20 dwarves, each sucking a finger + toe. Please."

By: found missing

found missing — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 09:50:58 -0800

I think they prefer to be called little people.

By: graventy

graventy — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:02:21 -0800

I haven't had a chance to read this post yet, but I wanted to express my delight at the way it leads in to the previous post. Before I die I want to... Get me a robot arm that looks like the Terminator

By: lumensimus

lumensimus — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:05:22 -0800

Before I die, I'd like to have a goal.

By: booticon

booticon — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:08:18 -0800

HORIZONTAL SCROLL BAD BOOTICON SMASH

By: fixedgear

fixedgear — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:08:21 -0800

I could deal (barely) with the horizontal scrolling on the Peloton post, but here? Not so much. Anyway, before I die I'm gonna grow a handlebar moustache. I'm starting right now. No one will know if it's ironic or serious.

By: bchase

bchase — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:09:17 -0800

I was thinking the exact opposite of what Astro Zombie said, and mocking all the people with goals we all know they will never accomplish, and are just choosing in an attempt to look cool. My personal favorite was "Before I die I want to spend as little time as possible with assholes." You and me both, sister.

By: philip-random

philip-random — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:13:07 -0800

Yeah, this is instantly annoying. I'm still waiting for my coffee to brew so I don't have the words to express myself yet Okay now I've got it: the source of my loathing for this project. I can see it working as a very effective ad campaign for selling credit cards or whatever (maybe it already is). Cute, average, middle class people with cute, average, middle class goals championing the great emptiness within. I prefer the Andy Warhol dictum: "You haven't lived until you've fucked life in gall bladder" ... or words to that effect.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:16:05 -0800

Stuff White People Buy "Before I die I want to spend as little time as possible with assholes." Ditto, that's when I closed the tab.

By: fixedgear

fixedgear — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:16:39 -0800

"You haven't lived until you've ~~fucked life in gall bladder~~ punched life in the dick."

By: kid ichorous

kid ichorous — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:18:05 -0800

This would be cooler if the artist were willing to follow up on the implicit promise of violence in the work, flush with Polaroids of these same yuppie mugs in frozen states of pursuit/bloodied terror/denial. When pressed, Ethan didn't really want to bed a supermodel after all. More than anything, he just wanted to hug his assailant's leg and buy back his life with timeshares in Martha's Vineyard.

By: Devils Slide

Devils Slide — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:19:25 -0800

Before I die I want to get over the fact that I wasted 97 minutes of my life watching The Bucket List.

By: chelegonian

chelegonian — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:20:18 -0800

it'd be nice to see a follow-up: now I'm dead it like to... or the more probable (but very morbid) now I'm dying i wish i had...

By: chelegonian

chelegonian — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:20:58 -0800

*i'd even

By: kid ichorous

kid ichorous — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:22:17 -0800

Also, on their choice of medium: The following excerpts are press that resulted from ks rives' and Nicole Kenney's curated exhibition entitled "Death + Extinction: A Polaroid Exhibition." The exhibition includes 5 Chicago and 6 New York artists who explored death and extinction through the "dying" Polaroid medium. It is on display at the Chicago Art Department (1837 South Halsted, Chicago) for August 2008. See! It's like, about awareness of mortality, and Polaroids are a dying medium. So liminal, man.

By: hellojed

hellojed — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:32:45 -0800

Before I die, I want to make a song about punching people in the dick.

By: Zack_Replica

Zack_Replica — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:48:06 -0800

Before I die I want to learn good spellin and handwritting.

By: keijo

keijo — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 10:56:47 -0800

I'm glad to see some people have as bad handwriting as I.

By: ZaneJ.

ZaneJ. — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:00:05 -0800

Man, people are fucking boring.

By: Suparnova

Suparnova — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:05:15 -0800

Wow, what a snarkfest. I thought it was interesting. The pictures tend to group together by trend in different locations. Two older men on a beach say remarkably similar things. My favourites, "Before I die I want to have 20 dwarves, one on each finger and toes, Please" and the simply put, "playin it day by day"

By: found missing

found missing — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:06:38 -0800

I think they prefer to be called little people.

By: Suparnova

Suparnova — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:09:41 -0800

Also, in some people are intoxicated, as shown by both the expression and the handwriting. "Drive a Tank!" is one entry, and one man actually writes, "before i die i want to think about grammar"

By: dirigibleman

dirigibleman — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:09:49 -0800

Think impossible, and then strive to make it possible! I'm going to grow arms out of my nipples! *concentrates really hard*

By: philip-random

philip-random — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:14:05 -0800

"You haven't lived until you've fucked life in gall bladder / punched life in the dick." A little research reveals: "To know death, Otto, you have to fuck life in the gall bladder." (from Andy Warhol's Frankenstein aka Flesh For Frankentstein).

By: desjardins

desjardins — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:17:36 -0800

How is it possible that all these people own a polaroid? Or is the "artist" walking around taking pictures of random people? (I'm too annoyed by the site to see if this is answered in a pretentious artist's statement. Besides, it crashed my browser.)

By: Henry C. Mabuse

Henry C. Mabuse — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:20:29 -0800

Before I die I want to make these pretentious artists pay with their lives.

By: Caduceus

Caduceus — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:36:34 -0800

Astro Zombie you're already a cult figure.

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:45:05 -0800

Interesting - there's a "go to South Africa", and there's a "swim with sharks", and there's "swim with sharks in South Africa". Anyway, before I die, I want to discover a cure for death.

By: spaceman_spiff

spaceman_spiff — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:45:25 -0800

I think they prefer to be called little people. Nope. Dwarf is acceptable, so is little person. Midget is not.

By: ardgedee

ardgedee — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:49:59 -0800

> ...a handlebar moustache. I'm starting right now. No one will know if it's ironic or serious. Ironic fashion statements have a way of becoming permanent parts of people's identities.

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:50:15 -0800

Not what I expected an NSA agent to look like

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:51:55 -0800

Confidence

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:52:56 -0800

Don't know how the NSA link got screwed up... it's actually this (I hope).

By: vorpal bunny

vorpal bunny — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:55:24 -0800

Not a single person referenced Mr. Show. Talk about waisting the chance of a lifetime.

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:58:24 -0800

Meet the next Genghis Khan

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 12:12:28 -0800

Oh, that reminds me of another life goal: To make a movie with Peter Dinklage.

By: Blackadder

Blackadder — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 12:20:49 -0800

Before I die, I want all of these people to go first. My favourite was: "Before I die I want to suckle on your still beating heart". I'm with you sister.

By: found missing

found missing — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 12:24:48 -0800

If I die, the terrorists will already have won.

By: codswallop

codswallop — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:29:33 -0800

Obviously, before I die I want to discover immortality. Duh.

By: kitchenrat

kitchenrat — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:29:52 -0800

before i die i want an end to this sort of public masturbation.

By: Target Practice

Target Practice — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:30:47 -0800

That's a whole lot of future-disappointed people.

By: ob

ob — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:43:59 -0800

Before I die I'd like to have worked out my last words.

By: Student of Man

Student of Man — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:46:06 -0800

Some of them I related too. Like the "have another drink". I would say something equally inconsequential...

By: fourcheesemac

fourcheesemac — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:55:39 -0800

We Mac notebook users can use two-fingered sideways scrolling on the trackpad. Not that it's worth it for this shit, though.

By: imperium

imperium — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 14:23:25 -0800

You guys, your right arrow key doesn't show you endless people wanting to live before they die?

By: grapefruitmoon

grapefruitmoon — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 14:42:41 -0800

Before I die, I want to find a cure for the common snark!

By: grapefruitmoon

grapefruitmoon — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 14:45:34 -0800

(Ok, ok, I really like this as an idea and I think Polaroids make any silly project just *adorable* - so I was disappointed to see the snarking here. AND THEN. And then I saw the woman who states that before she dies she wants to "Start a family w/Ryan." and all I can think about is Kelly from the Office (US). OK, SNARKERS. YOU WIN.)

By: luciaisdada

lucia__is__dada — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:24:27 -0800

A little research reveals: "To know death, Otto, you have to fuck life in the gall bladder." (from Andy Warhol's Frankenstein aka Flesh For Frankentstein). posted by philip-random at 11:14 AM on August 23 [+] [!] Warhol died after gall bladder surgery.

By: Dumsnill

Dumsnill — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:39:58 -0800

Before I die I want to see Aubrey de Grey and Ray Kurzweil die.

By: strawberryviagra

strawberryviagra — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:51:34 -0800

Looks like they're all dead.

By: Dumsnill

Dumsnill — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 16:08:05 -0800

Looks aren't everythingl

By: Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America

Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 16:08:14 -0800

Not what I expected an NSA agent to look like Maybe he's not an NSA employee. He may need to join before he can leave.

By: Dumsnill

Dumsnill — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 16:10:47 -0800

Weirdass l's are invisible and should be full stops.

By: bwg

bwg — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 17:21:20 -0800

MetaFilter: I want to spend as little time as possible with assholes

By: bwg

bwg — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 17:21:40 -0800

Before I die, I want those 30 seconds of my life back.

By: Joseph Gurl

Joseph Gurl — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 18:00:54 -0800

Only like 5 of them are even remotely interesting, the best of which being "piss my pants," "fuck a supermodel," and "cum in my jeans." I also really like that several of them don't even answer the question--one even starts, "if I died tomorrow..." Nine thumbs down.

By: Poolio

Poolio — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 18:48:15 -0800

Not what I expected an NSA agent to look like He probably works for the AT&T branch.

By: bigbigdog

bigbigdog — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 20:41:37 -0800

I liked the question. After copious thought: Before I die I want to see the aliens come. Yeah, space aliens. From outer space. Not bacteria found on Mars or some other frozen gasball. Not fossils. Not people-from-another-country-"illegal"-aliens, smartasses. Real live intelligent fucking extraterrestrial aliens. In spaceships. Or at least in unambiguous broadcast signals. It's going to happen eventually, even if it takes 30,000 years and we humans have to go out and hunt those fuckers down. Sometime before the end of time we'll have aliens, and before I die, I want to see them. So there.

By: edgeways

edgeways — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 21:55:49 -0800

Before I die I want to... "Get me a robot arm that looks like the Terminator." nice pairing of posts

By: jdotglenn

jdotglenn — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 22:27:03 -0800

Before I die I want to have sex at the Olympics. The Summer Olympics. With Olympians.

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 22:50:20 -0800

Before I die, I want to fuck Andy Warhol in the gallbladder. Then be famous for 15 minutes because of it.

By: paisley henosis

paisley henosis — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 02:28:53 -0800

"Before I die, I want to write my will." Seriously, that was the best you could come up with? Christ. The stupid Mighty Mouse makes these kinds of pages pretty easy to navigate, but everything that needed to be said was in the first two comments.

By: slimepuppy

slimepuppy — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 05:02:09 -0800

I can see what they're doing in the project and it's not without merit. I just think that the people being asked this question should be given more time to think about their answer. So you want to go to Ireland before you die? So, actually, what your life is missing is a bank-holiday weekend and a thousand dollars (if even that). I think that if people were pushed and really asked what they wanted to do before they die, it would be something less casual. I want to see Japan before I die, but if I die without having seen Japan, my life will not have been wasted. Before I die I want to be content with the life I have lived. It's easier to think about 'Where do you want to go' & 'What do you want to do/be' etc. These are concrete things with single sentence answers and, in all honesty, no one really knows what they want to do with their lives until they are dying. I imagine that very few people go to their deaths with every single thing they ever wanted to do (in their heart of hearts) completed.

By: hincandenza

hincandenza — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:29:23 -0800

This guy is kind of^H^H^H^H^H^H^H totally awesome, though.

By: DarlingBri

DarlingBri — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 23:28:42 -0800

Cute, average, middle class people with cute, average, middle class goals championing the great emptiness within. You know, most people have small dreams because they have small lives. Not everyone's cup runneth over with education, cash and economic opportunity. Falling in love, having some kids, and living long enough to meet your grandchildren has been the recipe for a happy life for generations in America. Just because it's average doesn't mean it's empty. My first instinct was the laugh at the young woman who's answer was "I want to go to four countries" because I was thinking, "Well, honey, you can drive to at least two, so..." but you know - there are a boatload of people who will never see four states, let alone four countries, so good for her. Being dismissive of relatively humble dreams is elitist and pretentious. Just because they don't meet your standards doesn't mean they're not worthy of other people's time and attention.

By: AppleSeed

AppleSeed — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 11:50:12 -0800

The ones who want to skydive and bungee jump - that's not *right* before, I hope?

Comments on: Before I die I want to make a cool polaroid project.

Before I die I want to make a cool polaroid project.

By: norabarnacl3

By: jayder

By: philip-random

By: Nelson

By: Astro Zombie

By: shoebox

By: dixie flatline

By: found missing

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By: Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America

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