We Could Be Heroes...

August 28, 2008 7:24 AM

A Serbian village erecting a statue to reggae superstar Bob Marley? Sure, why not? A Bosnian town with a statue of kung-fu legend Bruce Lee? Hell, yeah! And how 'bout, say, a Serbian monument to Rocky? Er, well.. ok. But the British Museum displaying what they say is the largest gold statue built since ancient Egypt, of... Kate Moss? Um... I dunno. I prefer the Russian monument to the enema.
posted by flapjax at midnite (32 comments total)

Related, previously.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:25 AM on August 28, 2008

How will they find enough coke to stick in this giant statue's nostrils?
posted by spicynuts at 7:29 AM on August 28, 2008

Why not, if it attracts visitor that may also *gasp* look at the other statues? A museum isn't only for that snobby literates, innit?

And on a tanget, "siren" is an appropriate name for KM statue, as a little mythology helps understanding why: siren is, afaik, another name for mermaid (synonymous i guess?) . These half fish half woman creatures captured the attention of sailors, with their beautiy and their singing, eventually distracting them from their sailing duties , resulting in shipwrecks.

A touch mysognist if not correctly interpretated as a myth, but KM is indeed a siren as she attracts and distracts with her beauty to celebrityville and related trainwrecks.

Yet, if the sailor is warned she's a siren ..... ;)
posted by elpapacito at 7:47 AM on August 28, 2008

This "largest" statue is only 50kg. At gold's density, that's a cube about 14 centimeters (5-6 inches) on a side. Not so huge (although if they made it hollow....)

Still about 10 times the real weight of Kate Moss, though.
posted by DU at 7:49 AM on August 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

Tangentially, I visited London in 1995, and saw this floating down the Thames.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:51 AM on August 28, 2008

Monumentalism dos not equal art.
posted by orthogonality at 7:58 AM on August 28, 2008

Hey -- Salem, MA has a Bewitched ("Samantha") statue. Some don't like it.
posted by ericb at 8:01 AM on August 28, 2008

Hey, ericb, yet another Serbian town had plans underway for a statue honoring another Samantha, but they scrapped it.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:06 AM on August 28, 2008

saw this floating down the Thames.
posted by Faint of Butt

This better not be eponysterical!
posted by DU at 8:27 AM on August 28, 2008

Frank Zappa in Lithuania
posted by slickvaguely at 8:28 AM on August 28, 2008

Mission Accomplished
posted by Poolio at 8:32 AM on August 28, 2008

Freddie Mercury Memorial in Montreux, Switzerland.
posted by blue_beetle at 8:51 AM on August 28, 2008

We never knew of their presence.
They were old ones, and were wise,
And they watched us from above
With long and dispassionate eyes.
We will never know where they came from
Or just what brought them here,
But they have watched us now for millennia
Without being tempted to interfere.

They knew we could be savage
And they knew we could be cruel
And they knew of few things deadlier
Than a monkey with a tool,
But as long as we killed each other
They watched us without concern,
But as our tools grew crueler
They feared what we might learn.

And so they build an army,
And they hid it here and there:
Metal statues of our heroes,
And we took them, unaware,
And we placed them in our cities:
In Egypt, Serbia, elsewhere,
And we continued with our business
Never knowing to beware.

One day we will make a tool
That can split the sky in two,
And those that watch will know it
And they'll know just what to do:
With a twiddle of lever
Their army will amass:
Giant women made of gold;
Deadly fighters made of brass.

That night will be a long one
Of fear, and blood, and cries,
And morning will be quiet,
And above us, in the skies,
In long and silver machines
That behold the silent day,
The watchers will stop watching
And they will turn and look away.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:52 AM on August 28, 2008 [2 favorites]

There's a statue of Stevie Ray Vaughn in Austin, Texas. How hard does that rock?
posted by fourcheesemac at 8:54 AM on August 28, 2008

In Soviet Russia, enema is friend.
posted by notashroom at 9:15 AM on August 28, 2008 [3 favorites]

That's right! And with friends like these, who needs enemas?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:20 AM on August 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

Not a statue, but here's the headstone of Alfred Harvey, founder of Harvey Comics (Casper the Friendly Ghost, Baby Huey, Richie Rich, Little Dot, Little Lulu, Little Audrey et al).

It's in Westchester County, NY.
posted by Herodios at 9:20 AM on August 28, 2008

Mustn't forget the Monument to Benedict Arnold's Leg.

A hemidemihero. . . just for one day.
posted by Herodios at 9:24 AM on August 28, 2008

I can imagine Banksy is rubbing his hands in glee, and I really hope he manages to do something about this.
posted by micayetoca at 9:42 AM on August 28, 2008

Presumably, the giant gold statue of Kate Moss symbolizes society's worship of celebrity idols.

And that's basically it. I sincerely hope the ironic lack of depth was intentional.
posted by Sys Rq at 9:59 AM on August 28, 2008

And on a tanget, "siren" is an appropriate name for KM statue, as a little mythology helps understanding why: siren is, afaik, another name for mermaid (synonymous i guess?) . These half fish half woman creatures captured the attention of sailors, with their beautiy and their singing, eventually distracting them from their sailing duties , resulting in shipwrecks.

No, the funny thing is that it's precisely the opposite. Sirens were horrific bird-women who lived on an island surrounded by piles of rotting corpses. Once you got close enough to look at them, I guess, it was already too late.

In other words, Golden Kate Moss is a harpy.
posted by nasreddin at 10:01 AM on August 28, 2008

Elvis in Israel.
posted by cosmac at 11:30 AM on August 28, 2008

All of this pales in comparison to Superman and Spiderman zooming across Jalan Cihampelas in Bandung, Indonesia, emerging from the walls of two clothing outlets.
posted by mdonley at 11:35 AM on August 28, 2008

Woody Allen in Oviedo
posted by carsonb at 12:33 PM on August 28, 2008

John Lennon in La Habana.
posted by micayetoca at 12:38 PM on August 28, 2008

Sirens were horrific bird-women who lived on an island surrounded by piles of rotting corpses.

Thanks nasreddin, I had my mythology wrong.
posted by elpapacito at 12:59 PM on August 28, 2008

Bart Simpson (kinda) in Cape Town.
posted by PenDevil at 1:01 PM on August 28, 2008

There's a statue of Stevie Ray Vaughn in Austin, Texas. How hard does that rock?

Not as hard as the awesome record cover by the late, lamented Motards* showing them taking a collective piss on it. To me, that statue symbolizes everything bad about the Austin music scene. As good as SRV was (despite all his songs sounding pretty much the same), he pretty much single-handedly created the glut of soulless guitar fetishists trying to emulate him, playing soulless white man "blues-rock", that has consisted of far too much of the local scene for far too long.

* They got all ages punk shows banned from VFW halls by completely destroying the stage area at one. I was there and it was one of the best shows I ever saw.
posted by DecemberBoy at 3:33 PM on August 28, 2008

ha ha ha i know nino that put the bruce lee statue up - lovely bloke and will sell you sweet sweet bosnian tobacco for bugger all : )
posted by sgt.serenity at 3:41 PM on August 28, 2008

I can't believe nobody's mentioned the Mary Tyler Moore statue in Minneapolis.

What about a town in southern China paying tribute to Optimus Prime?

Or a high school in Ohio erecting a monument to George Bush/No Child Left Behind? (I know, self-link...)
posted by Strange Interlude at 5:05 PM on August 28, 2008

Oops, looks like the link to my GWB/NCLB photos got swallowed by my free Flickr account. Perhaps it's time to look for a better photo host...
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:12 PM on August 28, 2008

Vladimir Lenin in Seattle.
posted by zardoz at 7:32 PM on August 28, 2008