Playing 20 questions with the world.
September 19, 2008 7:23 AM Subscribe
I remember when I was about 14 – young, lithe, and beautiful - and I knew it. I was with some friends at a festival, and a much older man came up to me and said, “You are really pretty.” I replied snottily, “And you’re too old for me.” He answered, “and I’m gay,” and walked away. I mourn that moment because although I did not know him, I had become ugly to him. I was ugly on the inside.
Aw hell -that one got me in the heart.
posted by Jody Tresidder at 7:46 AM on September 19, 2008 [6 favorites]
Aw hell -that one got me in the heart.
posted by Jody Tresidder at 7:46 AM on September 19, 2008 [6 favorites]
It was the violent farewell for me.
posted by mandal at 7:48 AM on September 19, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by mandal at 7:48 AM on September 19, 2008 [2 favorites]
This one is funny:
posted by exogenous at 7:49 AM on September 19, 2008
My now-husband and I were at a state park having sex in the backseat of my Volvo. A county cop knocked on the window while my boyfriend was thrusting. I rolled it down and the cop said: “This is unacceptable. Next time bring a blanket and do it in the woods like normal people.” He left and we continued.
posted by exogenous at 7:49 AM on September 19, 2008
These are brilliant. For some reason, these get to me much more than postsecret and other sites, which have the feel of voyeurism and confessional to them. This feels more like one of those conversations where you get drunk and everyone tells their wackiest stories.
posted by Happy Dave at 7:52 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Happy Dave at 7:52 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
I like sites like this. It goes to show that no one is perfect and we all do stupid things at times. Excellent post.
posted by Mastercheddaar at 7:53 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by Mastercheddaar at 7:53 AM on September 19, 2008
that really is a nice site. a quick bookmark
That's some good post work there Blatcherness
posted by timsteil at 7:53 AM on September 19, 2008
That's some good post work there Blatcherness
posted by timsteil at 7:53 AM on September 19, 2008
The girl who masturbates in the car out of boredom, the "last time on the way from San Jose to ..."?
Yeah, we actually saw her.
(Or if it wasn't her, there's apparently a lot of people on that highway with the same idea).
And it's not even at the top of my list for "Strangest thing" I've ever seen.
posted by misha at 7:55 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
Yeah, we actually saw her.
(Or if it wasn't her, there's apparently a lot of people on that highway with the same idea).
And it's not even at the top of my list for "Strangest thing" I've ever seen.
posted by misha at 7:55 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
This feels more like one of those conversations where you get drunk and everyone tells their wackiest stories.
Agreed, and it doesn't feel as emo as Postsecrets, partially due to the choice of what to illustrate.
Some favorites: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:16 AM on September 19, 2008
Agreed, and it doesn't feel as emo as Postsecrets, partially due to the choice of what to illustrate.
Some favorites: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:16 AM on September 19, 2008
I had a far more interesting celebrity encounter than the mundane run-in with Paris Hilton someone wrote about on that site. I was at a urinal at Spago's in Beverly Hills when someone behind me shouted out, "Hey Larry, I'm a huge fan" (or something similar to that). The guy next to me at the adjoining urinal (I couldn't see him since I was following etiquette and staring straight ahead) responded with, "Thanks, you're loyal" and it was the unmistakable voice of Larry King. I even had to wait behind him in line for the paper towels.
posted by The Gooch at 8:19 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by The Gooch at 8:19 AM on September 19, 2008
Hey Brandon, none of those links work, I think they're HTML embeds for your blog rather than direct links.
posted by Happy Dave at 8:27 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by Happy Dave at 8:27 AM on September 19, 2008
(The question being: What was the single most terrifying moment of your life?)
posted by Kiwi at 8:40 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by Kiwi at 8:40 AM on September 19, 2008
When I was a little kid living in Los Angeles, there were two trailers parked on my street. The first was extremely run down and had been there for months if not years. My parents explained that the man lived in it because he didn't have a house but that that was okay - and other such tolerance lessons parents teach their kids.
The second trailer was there for only a few weeks, and I assumed that the man who lived inside was homeless, too. He had daughters that were my age, and since I had some extra toys I would play with them while their dad was off doing whatever. I was a chatterbox who liked talking to adults, and I thought he was nice, so I repeated my version of some of my parent's lessons. (Just because you don't have a normal home doesn't mean you're a bad person! One day you can buy one if you want and you keep working hard!)
As I learned a few years later, the second 'homeless' man was actually Bruce Willis filming Color of Night. So there's my weird celebrity story.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 8:40 AM on September 19, 2008 [3 favorites]
The second trailer was there for only a few weeks, and I assumed that the man who lived inside was homeless, too. He had daughters that were my age, and since I had some extra toys I would play with them while their dad was off doing whatever. I was a chatterbox who liked talking to adults, and I thought he was nice, so I repeated my version of some of my parent's lessons. (Just because you don't have a normal home doesn't mean you're a bad person! One day you can buy one if you want and you keep working hard!)
As I learned a few years later, the second 'homeless' man was actually Bruce Willis filming Color of Night. So there's my weird celebrity story.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 8:40 AM on September 19, 2008 [3 favorites]
This was not what I was expecting. I was expecting more like:
World: Okay, go.
Commonties.com: Okay, are you an animal?
World: No.
Commonties.com: Mineral?
W: No.
C: Are you a person?
W: Yes.
C: Are you C Thomas Howell?
W: Oh my God! How did you guess?!
C: It was because you've been watcing Soul Man over and over again all week.
posted by shmegegge at 8:47 AM on September 19, 2008 [15 favorites]
World: Okay, go.
Commonties.com: Okay, are you an animal?
World: No.
Commonties.com: Mineral?
W: No.
C: Are you a person?
W: Yes.
C: Are you C Thomas Howell?
W: Oh my God! How did you guess?!
C: It was because you've been watcing Soul Man over and over again all week.
posted by shmegegge at 8:47 AM on September 19, 2008 [15 favorites]
Some favorites: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
Those links don't work, because of some goofy anti-deep-link thing.
Here are the actual images, which appear, at the moment at least, to be direct-linkable:
1 2 3 4 5
posted by dansdata at 8:49 AM on September 19, 2008
Those links don't work, because of some goofy anti-deep-link thing.
Here are the actual images, which appear, at the moment at least, to be direct-linkable:
1 2 3 4 5
posted by dansdata at 8:49 AM on September 19, 2008
Hey Brandon, none of those links work
Yah, let's wreck basic functionality of the web!
Once more, with feeling: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:56 AM on September 19, 2008
Yah, let's wreck basic functionality of the web!
Once more, with feeling: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:56 AM on September 19, 2008
I think a standard reply to any 'where can I find inspiration for my art' questions on the green needs to be right here. So many incredible stories, all waiting to be illustrated.
posted by Happy Dave at 9:32 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Happy Dave at 9:32 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]
Goddamn, I really shouldn't be reading these at work.
*sniff*
posted by Happy Dave at 9:38 AM on September 19, 2008
*sniff*
posted by Happy Dave at 9:38 AM on September 19, 2008
What a great little site. Thanks for posting it!
posted by jamesonandwater at 9:50 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by jamesonandwater at 9:50 AM on September 19, 2008
There's rather a lot of masturbation stories, aren't there?
posted by Jilder at 9:54 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by Jilder at 9:54 AM on September 19, 2008
The questions might be necessary to elicit the answers, but I'd rather read the answers without the questions.
posted by pracowity at 10:03 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by pracowity at 10:03 AM on September 19, 2008
Excellent site. Mostly devoid of sentimentality, cuteness, which would be so easy with this kind of subject matter. Kudos to editor Elizabeth Armstrong Moore.
posted by philip-random at 10:14 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by philip-random at 10:14 AM on September 19, 2008
Huh. I would have sworn I found this site on the blue. A couple of months ago, this would have been. Apparently not, though.
Now I wish I'd posted it.
posted by Caduceus at 10:27 AM on September 19, 2008
Now I wish I'd posted it.
posted by Caduceus at 10:27 AM on September 19, 2008
My answers would have Shocked them. Shocked, I say. They would then call the authorities and I would be placed in a home where I would play RPG games all day long.
posted by doctorschlock at 10:50 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by doctorschlock at 10:50 AM on September 19, 2008
March 1982, Worthington, Ohio. A car rammed me from behind. I pulled over to let him pass. He got out. It was the guy from the party I just left, so I rolled down the window. "Hi," I said. He pointed the gun and cocked the hammer. "You lied. It's not your number."
OK, that one gave me chills.
posted by Knappster at 10:56 AM on September 19, 2008
OK, that one gave me chills.
posted by Knappster at 10:56 AM on September 19, 2008
This was not what I was expecting. I was expecting more like:
World: Okay, go.
Commonties.com: Okay, are you an animal?
World: No.
Ha. That was what I was expecting, too. Thanks for posting this, Brandon--great site.
The best answers on there remind me of some of the small but moving stories posted in Metafilter comments every so often.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 10:59 AM on September 19, 2008
World: Okay, go.
Commonties.com: Okay, are you an animal?
World: No.
Ha. That was what I was expecting, too. Thanks for posting this, Brandon--great site.
The best answers on there remind me of some of the small but moving stories posted in Metafilter comments every so often.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 10:59 AM on September 19, 2008
This fascinates me the same way post secret fascinated me when I found it. I haven't been to post secret in months, I lost interest in it...be interesting to see if this holds up over time.
There's rather a lot of masturbation stories, aren't there?
It's sort of physically being an adult at its most basic level, isn't it?
posted by maxwelton at 11:05 AM on September 19, 2008
There's rather a lot of masturbation stories, aren't there?
It's sort of physically being an adult at its most basic level, isn't it?
posted by maxwelton at 11:05 AM on September 19, 2008
Yes, thanks for posting. I keep going backward through the "previous" ones. Some read a little false to me (the most poetic and eloquent in the bunch).
Others are starkly pragmatic, like this one in answer to what were the strangest circumstances under which you have been intimate: "I felt sorry for him cause he was a midget. And I had never done anything with someone so short."
posted by misha at 11:17 AM on September 19, 2008
Others are starkly pragmatic, like this one in answer to what were the strangest circumstances under which you have been intimate: "I felt sorry for him cause he was a midget. And I had never done anything with someone so short."
posted by misha at 11:17 AM on September 19, 2008
Oh, and my favorite, if only for the great NSFW illustration: this one
posted by misha at 11:30 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by misha at 11:30 AM on September 19, 2008
Nifty
posted by Smedleyman at 11:51 AM on September 19, 2008
posted by Smedleyman at 11:51 AM on September 19, 2008
This is fantastic.
posted by mewithoutyou at 12:22 PM on September 19, 2008
posted by mewithoutyou at 12:22 PM on September 19, 2008
At the local air conditioning business where I once worked, some house tools had been stolen. A disgruntled employee was suspected – of which, unfortunately, there were many. Furious, the unpopular owner posted the following sign: “My tools had better be returned, immediately! Otherwise, steps will be taken!”
The next day, three ladders disappeared.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
posted by Skot at 1:15 PM on September 19, 2008 [4 favorites]
The next day, three ladders disappeared.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
posted by Skot at 1:15 PM on September 19, 2008 [4 favorites]
A lot of these are really well done, both the illustrations and the stories. Thanks, Brandon.
posted by notashroom at 1:20 PM on September 19, 2008
posted by notashroom at 1:20 PM on September 19, 2008
This is much more entertaining and insightful than The Worst Thing I've Ever Done, which is a fantastic book nonetheless. Thanks very much for posting this.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 3:01 PM on September 19, 2008
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 3:01 PM on September 19, 2008
Gave me shivers.
I couldn't decide if that was the sweetest thing or kinda creepy and a potential burden for the widow. Sorta like "promise me you'll never be with anyone else, even if I die."
I guess I should lean to the former, eh?
posted by maxwelton at 4:40 PM on September 19, 2008
I couldn't decide if that was the sweetest thing or kinda creepy and a potential burden for the widow. Sorta like "promise me you'll never be with anyone else, even if I die."
I guess I should lean to the former, eh?
posted by maxwelton at 4:40 PM on September 19, 2008
true love and creepiness - never that far apart.
posted by philip-random at 5:51 PM on September 19, 2008
posted by philip-random at 5:51 PM on September 19, 2008
An excerpt from this appears as one of the answers, but the long version is very very much worth reading.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 1:17 PM on September 20, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Solon and Thanks at 1:17 PM on September 20, 2008 [1 favorite]
« Older Rosenbaum, The Plausible-Fabulist | Chronophage Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by creasy boy at 7:43 AM on September 19, 2008 [1 favorite]