The Bridge to New Zealand
October 11, 2008 7:19 AM   Subscribe

 
that was awesome - thank you
posted by jammy at 7:26 AM on October 11, 2008


uh, so a democrat wants to be a republican candidate because she is more democratic?
posted by yonation at 7:26 AM on October 11, 2008


This is not saying much when we consider that a cardboard cutout of Sarah Palin that merely stood there and looked hot would capture the "VPILF" crowd and avoid so many embarrassing gaffes. In fact, if you had a speaker next to it that said 'I may not answer this question as you like...but abortion is murder' on a regular basis it might well still pick up 27% of the vote.
posted by jaduncan at 7:34 AM on October 11, 2008 [7 favorites]


That was very funny, thanks.
posted by voltairemodern at 7:41 AM on October 11, 2008


Yes, that was great. Thanks.
posted by sueinnyc at 7:43 AM on October 11, 2008


A small potato would make a better VP than Palin.

Carry on.
posted by Jilder at 7:49 AM on October 11, 2008 [3 favorites]


But do you have a hubby arrested for drunk driving? a son off to Iraq because judge said (drugs) join up or jail? adultery with husband's partner( signed affidavits to that plus lie detector), daughter taught the importance of chastity who then gets knocked up (sure:private but if you want to tell us how to live, then public)...see, you are runner up; but not as good
posted by Postroad at 7:56 AM on October 11, 2008 [2 favorites]


Yes, Jilder, that's true, most carrion would indeed make a better VP than Palin.
posted by DreamerFi at 8:01 AM on October 11, 2008


..a son off to Iraq because judge said (drugs) join up or jail?

Wait...what? I did not hear of that. I didn't even know that still happened.
posted by DU at 8:45 AM on October 11, 2008


That's why I joined MetaFilter.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 8:47 AM on October 11, 2008


Yeah, does anyone have an actual source for the "Judge told Track Palin it's the Army or jail" rumor?
posted by Flunkie at 9:09 AM on October 11, 2008


Speaking of blood sports, I have to give it up to the Governor on the hunting issue. I have never shot a wolf from a helicopter, but I have thrown my cat off the bed. Hundreds of times.

That there is the funniest thing I've read in connection to Sarah Palin.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 9:18 AM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Flunkie - check here
posted by milkrate at 9:36 AM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Who is Barack Obama? Who is the real Barack Obama? Who?
Barack Obama says he likes fried chicken and collard greens.
But he also likes foie gras and lahdi-dah.

How disrespectful.

This November, learn Mister Hussain good where he belong - picking cotton in Gitmo

I'm John McCain and I approve this message because Steve Schmidt told me to and sometimes he hits me and I know he's only kidding but it really hurts
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 10:09 AM on October 11, 2008 [11 favorites]


There seems to be a general consensus that Sarah Palin is not the most... qualified person to be selected as a vice presidential candidate (and therefore possible president). I mean, there's a thread on Fark that shows she's seen as something of a joke (yeah, I know, fark threads... but this one's actually pretty funny, especially the attempts at "payback" by diehard Republican posters).

So, with the choice between
A) more of the same America has endured for the last eight years, plus a slightly less-than-ideal VP candidate
and
B) someone who at least nominally stands for change and has picked a VP candidate who at least doesn't immediately provokes giggles
- why is it still "a close race"?
posted by PontifexPrimus at 10:19 AM on October 11, 2008 [8 favorites]




I mean, there's a thread on Fark that shows she's seen as something of a joke

That's the first thread I've ever seen on Fark that was genuinely funny.

And damn, if that's how the Farkists feel about McCain/Palin, they are completely and utterly fucked.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 11:04 AM on October 11, 2008


I mean, there's a thread on Fark that shows she's seen as something of a joke (yeah, I know, fark threads... but this one's actually pretty funny, especially the attempts at "payback" by diehard Republican posters).


Hehehehe. I had to take a stop off at fark to read that thread. The comedy gold is where the posters need to explain to the weak conservative attempts that they're doing it wrong and how to properly make a joke with a punchline (somewhere around page 7). I've been trying to defend McCain/Palin supporters as not being dumb, just misinformed, but Fark (Fark!) may have just open my eyes on that one.
posted by [insert clever name here] at 11:13 AM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]




Please, no more Sarah Palin.
posted by MarshallPoe at 11:27 AM on October 11, 2008


Please, no more Sarah Palin.
posted by MarshallPoe


What the hell do you think we've been saying in thread after long, tedious thread??? "For the love of God--no more Sarah Fuckin' Palin!"

We will continue to post Palin posts until she is gone from the scene. You'll have to pry the Palin posts from our cold, dead...well, you get the idea.

Three more weeks and then I promise not to mention her name again.
posted by leftcoastbob at 11:38 AM on October 11, 2008 [2 favorites]


"join up or jail?"

Is that improve, or recidivate? Which is more healthy for everything, especially the individual? Armed Forces, or jail? More judges should still have this option. "I'm proud of my child for un*F*ing his life via the military" as compared to "my child is currently incarcerated"?

Rosanne Cash will never accept the pay cut that civil service requires. A dart and a phonebook could pick better candidates than either party has.
posted by buzzman at 11:47 AM on October 11, 2008


The info about Track Palin, drug (OxyContin) addict, being sent off to Iraq as a way to get him off the horizon is from the article in The National Enquirer which statistically appears to be the newspaper of choice of people who might vote for McCain/Palin based on their not having a college degree. Another article about Palin inthe National Enquirer. The problem is that this might elicit identification sympathy from the readers of that tabloid or it may be grassroots tar that sticks.
posted by nickyskye at 11:49 AM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


PS, totally loved Roseanne Cash's wit. Got some great first laughs of the day from it. Thanks for the post AstroGuy.
posted by nickyskye at 11:50 AM on October 11, 2008


PPS, Since Roseanne Cash underwent brain surgery just last November, if she's reading this, my prayers for her health and good survival, the planet needs not only her wonderful singing but her intelligence and brave speaking out, in the face of many country and western music fans being Republican. Her dad, Johnny Cash, was against the Iraq War.

In fact, the image of country music as a Republican anthem was so ingrained in the genre around the time of Toby Keith's 2003 album "Shock'n Y'all" that a group of artists and industry executives banded together to form the Music Row Democrats.

Democrats to reclaim country music


When Barack Obama finished his acceptance speech Thursday night (Aug. 28) at the Democratic National Convention, a lot of country fans were no doubt surprised — or downright shocked — that Brooks & Dunn’s “Only in America” provided the soundtrack to the festivities
.
posted by nickyskye at 12:16 PM on October 11, 2008 [3 favorites]


My favorite
posted by Flunkie at 12:31 PM on October 11, 2008 [2 favorites]


I thought the piece was funny, but if you want to see something really funny check out the Fox "News" bit on how wrong it was not to airbrush Pallin's face on the cover of Newsweek. Just how weird and fucked up is this election season going to get.

By the way, is there a way we can actually talk about the issues instead of this shit.
posted by Belle O'Cosity at 1:14 PM on October 11, 2008


ROFL, Flunkie, thanks for the guffaw! Hamlet, Hamlet, Hamlet Omelet.
posted by nickyskye at 1:22 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Jilder, I'm sure you meant small potatoe?
posted by warcode at 1:24 PM on October 11, 2008


Geez, Nickyskye, can we get a spoiler warning please?
posted by Samizdata at 1:37 PM on October 11, 2008


PPS, Since Roseanne Cash underwent brain surgery just last November

!

Wow. Glad she's OK. I like her work, and after this piece, I like her more. :)
posted by weston at 1:46 PM on October 11, 2008


oh dear, Samizdata, which link ruffled your feathers? Was there an image of gore, dead people or something worse? Or are you kidding?

Adding to the Palin fest, Samizdata, don't look, this might be too disturbing.

Palin's peachfuzz (high res pic of the Newsweek cover with the few stray hairs that caused such a huge unfair not to airbrush that! kerfuffle).
posted by nickyskye at 1:48 PM on October 11, 2008


...how wrong it was not to airbrush Pallin's face on the cover of Newsweek.

Princess Sparkle Pony had the best headline, I think: Campaign Lesson: Alienate the Media and They Might Forget to Airbrush Away Your Mustache.
posted by rokusan at 1:49 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Re: the Fark thread here,
Win, win win win. WIN. Win win. WIN!! (All the same image :p)
posted by cavalier at 1:50 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


And yes it's already been linked. Damnit. Still.. I want to see a [spoiler redacted] hold a press conference!
posted by cavalier at 1:52 PM on October 11, 2008


oh god, that FARK thread really is hilarious. Great addition to this one.
posted by nickyskye at 1:59 PM on October 11, 2008


As a New Zealander, I'm really concerned about the McCain/Palin ticket. I have no idea how we would cope with the influx in the event that they win.

Go Obama!
posted by pivotal at 2:07 PM on October 11, 2008 [2 favorites]


Off Topic: Has anyone here actually seen the Newsweek cover in person? I ask, because digital images can be altered to add mustache hairs pretty easily. If she really does have that many under her nose, I am far more shocked that a forty-something woman doesn't know how to deal with that before having extreme closeups taken (or being face-to-face with people) than that Newsweek didn't airbrush it. I'm an over-forty woman myself, and I learned how to get rid of annoying hairs as soon as the first one popped up.
posted by Orb at 2:15 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


OMG. I was going to bypass the Fark link on the general principle that Fark is incredibly lame. That was too frikken funny though, Thanks for finding that, PontifexPrimus
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 2:39 PM on October 11, 2008


Orb, I'm sitting here with that issue of Newsweek next to my laptop. Yes, the mustache hairs are visible, although they're small and not noticeable unless you get very close to the cover. I'm 40, was raised Southern among girly-girls, and I'd get lip waxes if I were running for VP, thank you. Having said that, I'm not sorry she didn't, because hey, a bit of lip hair is normal, and there's nothing wrong with seeing that it's normal.

Having looked at the cover in person, I think if Newsweek's artists had tried to airbrush her skin and remove the hairs, they would have had a lot of trouble doing it without damaging the crispness of the details of the image or making her look like she had plastic skin with no pores at all. Not only would that have missed the point of the article, it also would have excited at least as much comment from the "OMG liberal media hates conservatives" types as the cover they used caused. If they wanted to fix her pores, wrinkles, (tiny) mustache hairs, etc., they probably needed to abandon the closeup completely.
posted by immlass at 2:41 PM on October 11, 2008


Someone post that Fark thread the front page, I haven't got the balls.

Here's my fave.

posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:44 PM on October 11, 2008


MORE LINKS TO LOLPALIN OP-EDS PLS
posted by Krrrlson at 2:44 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


I love Rosanne Cash. Always have. Good on her for this one.

In fact, the image of country music as a Republican anthem was so ingrained in the genre around the time of Toby Keith's 2003 album "Shock'n Y'all" that a group of artists and industry executives banded together to form the Music Row Democrats.

You know, kids like Toby Keith seem to forget the populist/progressive roots of country music, stretching all the way back to poor Appallachian folks dealing in themes like poverty, mine bosses, and union-busting cops. Even Alabama, probably one of the most successful country acts in recent memory, stood by this tradition.

This is what I hate about all this red state/blue state crap - pro-business politicians spouting empty populist rhetoric and scare tactics have torn apart this country for decades now, and it exacerbates the vicious circle of mistrust and antagonism between rural and sub/urban people, while Wall Street and defense contractors laugh. I'm glad to see some progress being made in reversing this, but I think we still have a long way to go.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 2:46 PM on October 11, 2008


I have seen the Newsweek cover in person. It's not that bad and the gloss on the paper makes the fuzz, there and elsewhere, less obvious. However, the magazine does have a flap promo-ing something covering half the cover. In the grocery store, you only see one of her eyes and part of the jaw.

I have seen me some unflattering darn photos of many people in public office. Does she expect the standard of being voted for does she want to be treated like Hayden Panettiere?

Back on topic, that "Sarah Palin Conspiracy Theories: The Ultimate Guide" page seems a little saggy to me. For instance, the remark about a letter "from someone identifying herself as Anne Kilkenny of Wasilla" as if Anne Kilkenny wasn't found within 24 hours and identified as both the author of the email and someone in a position to know the they things in the letter. WTF? And having her first son at least 5 weeks premature ... it just goes on and on with leaving out things that might have weight on some of these, and just dismissing the rumor for odd reasons. And never mind that my favorites don't appear.

Roseanne Cash cannot be the running mate - she has a regular column in the NYT and so is part of the liberal media elite which Sarah Palin, a one-time and quite possibly future TV journalist with a degree in broadcast journalism, is not.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 2:50 PM on October 11, 2008


Last week, a friend pointed me to that Fark thread. I was skeptical, but I ended up telling other people about it.
posted by Stylus Happenstance at 3:22 PM on October 11, 2008


Thanks for the info Immlass. I don't care if someone has lip hair or not, but people all over the internet (on both sides) seem to be making a big deal about it. It's not like I wax every day, just when I know there might be cameras around that might get close enough to me to notice, which means yes, if I were running for VP, my lip would be clear of any hairs ... 'cause I'm vain that way. :P
posted by Orb at 3:52 PM on October 11, 2008


East Manitoba: - the race isn't close w/r/t electoral votes, but the popular is pretty damned close. While that might not make a difference in theory when it comes to winning the election, it makes a huge difference in practice when it comes to what close to half of the people of this country think, or believe, to be true about Obama, or McCain, or what is right for America.

How can half of the voters choose McCain/Palin over Obama/Biden?? That's the part that is frightening.
posted by tzikeh at 6:34 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


*popular=popular vote. Not that it wasn't obvious from context, but fixing it anyway.
posted by tzikeh at 6:34 PM on October 11, 2008


This is my fave.
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 7:02 PM on October 11, 2008


I know you are skeptical about Fark, but I have seriously seen some of the best discussions this election season in the Politics tab. Plus they coined the tern "wharrrrgrrble" for ridiculous right wing rambling, which amuses me every time.

As for Palin's lip, really, I don't leave the house without checking for stray hairs (yay to being in my 30s!) If I was a major political figure I'd be getting electrolysis just in case I got distracted by a war or something and forgot to pluck.
posted by Biblio at 7:14 PM on October 11, 2008 [1 favorite]


Ha. Well, New Zealand may be almost "nowhere", but our current Prime Minister is a woman. An agnostic, childless, pro-choice, homely woman who could still out-think Sarah Palin after a litre of gin and a frontal lobotomy. And we elected her three elections running. Yay us.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 7:52 PM on October 11, 2008 [7 favorites]


the popular is pretty damned close

Only if you're unfamiliar with presidential elections. Right now the projected gap is Obama +10. It will probably narrow from that, but a gap of 10 isn't close. It's a blowout.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:10 PM on October 11, 2008


Armed Forces, or jail? More judges should still have this option.

Seems completely crazy to me. If you caught me at age 18 with pot, the goal should be to let me go or fine me, not the current options of signing up for 6 years in the military or going to prison.
posted by damn dirty ape at 8:56 PM on October 11, 2008


Only if you're unfamiliar with presidential elections.

Thanks for that, but I'm not. I'm talking 46% of voters to 51% of voters. if the same number of people turn out for this election as did in 2004, that'll be 62 million for Obama vs. 58 million for McCain. 4 million people in a country of approximately 225 million citizens 18 and over is not a big gap.
posted by tzikeh at 9:41 PM on October 11, 2008


I fell off my chair. Where do I turn over my MeFi SnarkClub membership?
posted by Sparx at 1:26 AM on October 12, 2008


My God, I'd never realized.

Johnny Cash DOES look like the guy on the Alaska Airlines logo.
posted by Graygorey at 12:45 PM on October 12, 2008


If I hadn't gotten my Obama-Biden T-shirt today, I'd seriously consider this.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:24 AM on October 13, 2008


I thought the piece was funny, but if you want to see something really funny check out the Fox "News" bit on how wrong it was not to airbrush Pallin's face on the cover of Newsweek. Just how weird and fucked up is this election season going to get.

Wasn't Fox the channel that got caught doctoring the faces of the NYT columnists who criticized them?
posted by Mental Wimp at 11:06 AM on October 13, 2008




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