Because bra burning is so passé

October 28, 2008 8:38 AM

Got a stack of bras you don't know what to do with? Charities will accept secondhand bras in good condition, but if you're in the mood to be creative there are bra crafting ideas on the net. You could make a bra wristlet, and then make a sleep mask out of the rest of the bra fabric, earrings out of the hardware, and a toy out of inserts. You could make a lavender sachet out of a bra and use it to perfume your lingerie drawer. One seemingly popular idea is to make a cute and feminine evening bag or, as one woman who wears a 36F quipped in a comment, luggage. If you're an especially sassy member of the Red Hat Society, you could make a purse that matches your hat. Some people even make hats out of the bras, though perhaps not every woman would care to so obviously wear a bra on her head. If you're a breast cancer survivor and want to avoid buying expensive and uncomfortably heavy prosthetics, you could knit yourself a pair of tits and go right on wearing your favourite bras. You could also make an art installation: a 5' bra ball. Here's a list of 28 things to do with old bras. And yes, I realize this post will make many of the men of MeFi want to get a lot of puns/juvenile comments off their chests, but titter away. You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.
posted by orange swan (49 comments total)

You all have Jonmc to thank for suggesting the theme for this post.
posted by orange swan at 8:39 AM on October 28, 2008

Or a hat! Or a plane! Or a pterodactyl...!
posted by miss lynnster at 8:47 AM on October 28, 2008 [2 favorites]

You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.

That sounds like a challenge...that nobody should attempt to meet.
posted by DU at 8:55 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

Res assured that I will NOT be doing that post. You couldn't even pay me to google that one.
posted by orange swan at 8:58 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.

If I had boobs I'd spend all day admiring them in a mirror, and I'd get nothing else done.

Sigh. A little self-knowledge is a dangerous thing.
posted by rokusan at 9:01 AM on October 28, 2008

If I had boobs I'd spend all day admiring them in a mirror

You know I spend at least 5-10 mins a day doing just that

Boobs are awesome :)
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 9:19 AM on October 28, 2008 [5 favorites]

Hey, orange swan? Any craft blogs you'd recommend?
posted by FunkyHelix at 9:20 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

That sounds like a challenge...that nobody should attempt to meet.

Worst. Helmet. Ever.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 9:21 AM on October 28, 2008

I'll also accept your secondhand underwear, ladies. Preferably unwashed. Trust me, I need the charity.

/does_not_own_a_jockstrap_so_can_only_meet_the_creepy_titter_challenge.
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 9:36 AM on October 28, 2008

Some where on the internet is a picture of me wearing the Red Hat Society bra hat my mother made. If I find it I will link.
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 9:39 AM on October 28, 2008

I will not be making a bra-purse anytime soon.
posted by Green Eyed Monster at 9:45 AM on October 28, 2008

I'll also accept your secondhand underwear, ladies. Preferably unwashed. Trust me, I need the charity.

Ew. Some things are better left unsaid, even when joking.
posted by Stewriffic at 9:48 AM on October 28, 2008

There are SO many good ones, FunkyHelix, I hardly know where to begin in terms of recommendations. I do find myself linking to Craftzine quite often. Here's a list of 25 of one blogger's favourites. I recognize a number of them as sites come across and used often when researching my posts.
posted by orange swan at 9:50 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.

Maybe, but we don't have to open a bra-purse to fiddle with our loose change.
posted by mandal at 9:51 AM on October 28, 2008

Some things are better left unsaid, even when joking.

Does that include passive-aggressive disclaimers tacked on to the end of posts?
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 9:56 AM on October 28, 2008

When I was interning at a television station, I had to write copy for a story about a guy who said he grew tomatoes in bras...
posted by Alexandra Kitty at 9:57 AM on October 28, 2008

knit yourself a pair of tits

or perhaps something to cover them.
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 10:00 AM on October 28, 2008

None of the bra craft ideas I came across really appeal to me except possibly the bra evening bags (I'd decorate mine until it was completely disguised), but I have enough evening bags. However, I am inspired to try making my own bras. I sew quite well, but it had never occurred to me that I might try to DIY a bra.

Bras are very expensive, especially if, as in my case, the boob fairy was especially generous and one needs lots of support. It drives me crazy to spend $40 or more on a bra. And then it's not like a woman can really get by with one or two. I want a fresh one to put on every morning, I need sport bras for physical activity and specialty cut bras for evening wear, and then I like to have some pretty ones for special occasions [cough]. It soon gets to be quite the investment. They don't last all that long, either. Surely once I evolved a well-fitting template I could make them reasonably efficiently and save some money, and also have some fun making some of them especially fancy. And as they wear out I could salvage the trimming and hardware to make new bras.
posted by orange swan at 10:07 AM on October 28, 2008

The bra ball is a fixture of the place where I work, and I've had to move it numerous times now. It doesn't really roll, despite all appearances. You get used to these things, too, over time, and they become a natural part of your surroundings, like fifteen-foot pink poodles and sparkly walls, and then you get caught all off guard finding your workplace on metafilter.

I was resident MC (a picture) for our big celebration of the bra ball, back in 2006. I made a saw blade bra getup to enhance my presumed masculinearity, but it didn't seem to help.
posted by sonascope at 10:11 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

None of the bra craft ideas I came across really appeal to me

Me neither, more's the pity. I'm such a pragmatist that I'd love to be able to reuse them. The first thing that came to mind was a reusable substitute for cheesecloth for straining things. But then that icked me out a little. So my next suggestion would be something like cutting the the elastic and fabric into strips to tie up tomato plants, and to use the underwires for row markers?
posted by Stewriffic at 10:15 AM on October 28, 2008

I'm a member of the brownhatter society. Does that count?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 10:19 AM on October 28, 2008

And then it's not like a woman can really get by with one or two.

Tell me about it. I may not be blessed by the boob fairy but I do have enough to need some sort of support. I ONLY have two bras. Because of constant washing one is beginning to shrink and the other (I call it the tank) is a padded, metal under wired monstrosity that shifts and pokes me. And as far as buying even with smaller sizes the prices are kind of steep for tings you wear under your clothes.
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 10:24 AM on October 28, 2008

That bra ball looks like it came from an X-rated Katamari Damacy.
posted by bibliowench at 10:26 AM on October 28, 2008 [4 favorites]

sonascope that is one hellacious bra. Dudes get to second base but they don't come back.
posted by Mister_A at 11:06 AM on October 28, 2008

"You all have Jonmc to thank for suggesting the theme for this post.
posted by orange swan at 8:39 AM"
An area of interest no doubt, but one might expect the subject to be recycling booze bottles.
posted by Cranberry at 11:12 AM on October 28, 2008

My mom died last year and I gave her clothes away, except for her bras which I didn't think anybody would want. She told me that when she was in the hospital someone on the staff took her bra and showed it to her coworkers, like she'd never seen a bra that big before (boob fairy--though mom said it was more a curse than a blessing). She'd have liked to see her bras recycled in some crafty way, but she didn't much appreciate them being passed around and marveled at. Anyway they're landfill now.
posted by Restless Day at 11:13 AM on October 28, 2008

I turned my old Fortinbras into the king of Denmark.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:23 AM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

I've got moobies. Does that count?
posted by doctorschlock at 11:27 AM on October 28, 2008

I'm sorry, but I just can't support this idea.
posted by QIbHom at 11:29 AM on October 28, 2008

Orange Swan, are you teasing me? Cause you've got my Moe-Joe rising.
posted by doctorschlock at 11:36 AM on October 28, 2008

Restless Day I'm so sorry some idiot did that to your mom when she was in hospital. Never ceases to amaze me what clods work in hospitals sometimes.
posted by dog food sugar at 11:40 AM on October 28, 2008

You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.

My improvised sling shot, let me show it to you...
posted by quin at 11:47 AM on October 28, 2008

You're probably just jealous you can't make such cool crafts out of your jock straps.

Great, now you've got my panties in a bunch.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:48 AM on October 28, 2008

My partner will like this, he is both cheap and bra-loving.

SheMulp, I always hand wash them in cold water and air dry them. I only use soap every few times, and only a little soap. It helps avoid shrinkage.

orangeswan, what I would really like is a method for shortening the back strap (which stretches faster than the rest). According to my sewing expert mother-in-law, underwire bras are incredibly difficult to make.
posted by sondrialiac at 11:51 AM on October 28, 2008

And by mother-in-law, I mean my friend's mother.
posted by sondrialiac at 11:52 AM on October 28, 2008

Actually, Jacques Trap is for sale, so I guess you could turn it into anything you want. A strip mall. A bowling alley. Hell, even a lingerie store.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:55 AM on October 28, 2008

what I would really like is a method for shortening the back strap (which stretches faster than the rest)

I suppose you could cut a piece out of the back strap and stitch the ends together again.
posted by orange swan at 12:20 PM on October 28, 2008

Missing project: Double-barreled water balloon launcher.
posted by loquacious at 12:47 PM on October 28, 2008

SheMulp AKA Plus 1: "If I had boobs I'd spend all day admiring them in a mirror

You know I spend at least 5-10 mins a day doing just that

Boobs are awesome :)"

Don't do that, don't write something like that!

Now I cannot concentrate on the matter at hand, which is bras, because I have to think of breasts, and mirrors, and admiring and fondling and...

and...

Sorry, what were we talking about?
posted by PontifexPrimus at 1:07 PM on October 28, 2008

What, just because I’m a guy I can’t wear a bra?

Women seem to have more accouterments and therefore more stuff to use in a practical way.

I saw a goodbad film (Freebie and the Bean, which I actually got a kick out of) probably the best scene in it is with Valerie Harper who is confronted by Bean (her husband) who thinks she’s unfaithful because he can’t find her douchebag. She shows him she made a plant watering system out of it.
Pretty funny scene really.
posted by Smedleyman at 1:56 PM on October 28, 2008

I suppose you could cut a piece out of the back strap and stitch the ends together again.

The biggest problem with this is that the shoulder straps change positions.
posted by sondrialiac at 2:00 PM on October 28, 2008

What, just because I’m a guy I can’t wear a bra?

Smedleyman, you bring up Freebie and the Bean in this context without mentioning the scene with the cross-dressing bad guy and the awesome fight scene with him and James Caan? That was a great scene.

Also, Thanks dog food sugar.
posted by Restless Day at 2:14 PM on October 28, 2008

This one.

/derail
posted by Restless Day at 2:18 PM on October 28, 2008

And yes, I realize this post will make many of the men of MeFi want to get a lot of puns/juvenile comments off their chests, but titter away.

I won't. Cross my heart.
posted by jonmc at 4:50 PM on October 28, 2008

And yes, I realize this post will make many of the men of MeFi want to get a lot of puns/juvenile comments off their chests, but titter away.

I won't. Cross my heart.
posted by jonmc at 4:50 PM on October 28, 2008

One for each cup, dammit.
posted by jonmc at 4:51 PM on October 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

Jockstrap Beer Cozy.
posted by swell at 5:59 PM on October 28, 2008

I am not sure about those of you with genuine boobage, but from the more pedestrian point of view, what really helps in bra comfort is the old school style with a WIDE band underneath. If you are going to try to sew one, try that.

Like this.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 7:59 PM on October 28, 2008

Oh wow, freaky - I wrote that 28 things to do with your old bra article! It's a small world after all - thanks orange swan!
posted by ukdanae at 8:22 AM on October 30, 2008