Faen!

November 17, 2008 8:19 AM

Faen! (SLYT) Will teach you a useful Norwegian swear word. Warning: will offend Finns, who will find their own favorite curse mocked, and annoy Danes, who will find that the dapper hat-wearing, glasses-doffing Norwegian mispronounces their favorite curse word. (NSFW: Much cursing in English and various Scandinavian languages; brief image of copulating turtles.)
posted by languagehat (44 comments total)

It amused the non-Norwegians greatly when we were watching a subtitled English film (might be Die Hard) and all of the swear words were translated into "faen". Does there exist another? I guess "helvete" might count as well.
posted by monocot at 8:27 AM on November 17, 2008

A good test to see if you're a "true" metal fan is whether you have any albums with TACK SOM FAAN in the liner notes.
posted by Wolfdog at 8:29 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Also, here's a better-delivered Perkele, which you can also hear about 8,000,000 times on the Trashed, Lost & Strungout DVD.
posted by Wolfdog at 8:31 AM on November 17, 2008

Well hell, if you can't start your week off by offending a Finn I don't know. I'm starting with Huckleberry, and the rest of you can just get in line.
posted by timsteil at 8:34 AM on November 17, 2008

Faen: Norwegian for taking your glasses off over and over again.
posted by bicyclefish at 8:37 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Yay! I can offend how many more people now? Umm... (consulting list of acquaintances)... damnit, NONE!

FAEN!!!!
posted by not_on_display at 8:39 AM on November 17, 2008

Poor Finns, not really fair to compare their Finno-Ugric language to the Indo-European ones. They even swear different!
posted by Nelson at 8:42 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Lasse is brilliant. I look forward to watching his career and fame grow.
posted by ethnomethodologist at 9:09 AM on November 17, 2008

I sent this link to my metal head/amature linguist friend, and this was his awesome response:

"I'm gonna disagree with Norway Joe here and say that Perkele sounds way more evil"

\m/
posted by piratebowling at 9:15 AM on November 17, 2008

No perkele. And I mean perrrrke-le, with deep abdomenal r's and a growl. Perkele is 'the oldest' name for the devil. Saatana is satan, and it also can be used as a curse word. Paholainen is the non-curse word meaning the same, loosely translates to 'the evilness'. Also helvetti, which finns share with swedes and norwegians in every sense. But nowadays you mostly hear vittu, vittu which is used much like faaaan. It can be quickly spit out: 'fvittu' or emphasised 'vitt-ttu'. It means the female genital, but only used in devaluing sense, much like american cunt, not like british cunt. It is mostly used by teenage boys. My favorite combination of profanities is 'voi kristuksen vittu', which means 'oh cunt of christ', but has a nice rhythm: 'voi kris-tuk-sen vittu!'.
posted by Free word order! at 9:46 AM on November 17, 2008

Methinks dear Lasse is throwing stones in a very glassy glass house. I mean, norwegian is, without a doubt, the wussiest of all Nordic languages. Icelandic and finnish are the two hardest languages, then comes danish due to its awesome gutturalness, then swedish, then norwegian. For a norwegian to mock a finnish word, no, it's just not right.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 9:58 AM on November 17, 2008 [4 favorites]

What a wonderful way to start the week. Thanks for the good bellylaughs languagehat.

That rascal reminds me a bit of you somehow in his hat and linguistic elaborating. Naturally, his delightful poking fun of perkele set me agoogling. Finnish profanity l Perkele l Sisu l Management by perkele (good reading that one). The Perkele Oi band, to Oi (oy!). I love sisu!

On preview, always meant to check out more about the Finno-Ugric peoples and languages. Ah, so that's who they are. Funny, how they got all the way over to Hungary. Wonder how that happened? I used to smoke ΚΑΡΕΛΙΑ cigarettes in Greece (the best tasting cancer sticks I ever was addicted to) and wondered what the heck is Karelia? And now I know, thanks to your post they were not named after the place but the family name, Καρέλιας (Karelias).

On preview, again, looked up this Lasse guy. Lasse Gjertsen, huh. I like his Roshambo cartoon too. He has a pretty admirer in California. His myspace page.

You know the Wikipedia international profanity page needs tome plumping up, not enough countries there.

Whoa, that was a global ramble. You inspire that kind of stuff lh. :)
posted by nickyskye at 9:59 AM on November 17, 2008 [3 favorites]

Well, I'm offended. And it's a scientific truth that when presented with a choice between "perkele" and "fa(e)n", 100% of the non-nordics pick "perkele".

Even this Swedish ad (for a Finnish beer) proves this fact.

(This was amusing, though.)
posted by phax at 10:10 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Much great perkeles here. (A parody of a typical finnish tragedy, with subtitles.)
posted by Free word order! at 10:16 AM on November 17, 2008 [2 favorites]

Metafilter: Much cursing in English and various Scandinavian languages
posted by xbonesgt at 10:26 AM on November 17, 2008

Meh. Knew it already.

/Norwegian :P
posted by Harald74 at 10:28 AM on November 17, 2008

That Swedish ad (for a Finnish beer) and parody of a typical finnish tragedy are awfully funny.
posted by nickyskye at 10:42 AM on November 17, 2008

As a norwegian with a fondness of swearing I have to admit I sometimes find the language itself slightly lacking. It doesn't have the immediacy I want.

Helvetes drittfaenskap (insert more muttering) is my standby phrase.


That said: I can't really take Danes seriously. Or Swedes. Finns, however, are always drunk and always mean-spirited. Rock. On. Perrrrkele indeed (awful norwegian parodies excluded).
posted by flippant at 11:01 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

I remember learning that one as a kid from my mom.
This summer, I was joking around with a friend at a coffee shop and when I said "Faun i helvete", a bunch of girls got up, said something in Norwegian, and stormed out.

I need to be more careful.
posted by dunkadunc at 11:11 AM on November 17, 2008

Faen-tastic!
posted by jason's_planet at 11:41 AM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

When my wife started learning Finnish she went over profanity by reading them to me and having me ask people at work what they meant.

Apparently curses in Finnish are much more severe.

I went down the list of which ones I could say without someone punching me in the mouth. There weren't any. So i use English for profanity.

Plus Finnish is such a specific language that if you don't pronounce it right you're saying something completely different.

Hissi is Elevator. You hold the S longer (like a one count).

Hiisi is Hell.

Kuusi is six

Kusi is Pee

Very very specific rules of pronunciation

The more you know...
posted by Lord_Pall at 12:28 PM on November 17, 2008

I recall drittsekk (shitbag) being used for a while in England back in the early 90s - my vague memory is that some Norwegian footballer or manager used it after a Norway/England game.

And as for the Finns - sing this song for Liverpool's Sammi Hyypia to the tune of the theme song for The Adams Family:

{click click etc.}
In our defensive foursome
He's absolutely awesome
From corners he will score some
He's Sammi Hyypia!
{click click etc.}
posted by Nick Verstayne at 12:32 PM on November 17, 2008

After living in Finland, I just can't take Swedes seriously. Especially not after seeing this.
posted by ValkoSipuliSuola at 12:46 PM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

One of my all time favorite songs,
Joan Armatrading's - Tall In The Saddle, has a bitter refrain

'Cos we had fun, fun, fun, fun
Fun, fun, fun
We had fun while it lasted

It will now forever have an unexpected Norwegian expletive twist in my appreciation and sound like faen, faen, faen.

/derail
lh, how did the Finno-Ugric languages get so far south west to Hungary without spreading to the other countries around it?

Do they say something like faen in Hungary?
posted by nickyskye at 12:51 PM on November 17, 2008

Du er fandeneme en dum Norsker, du kan ikke udtale "Fanden" rigtige.

/annoyed Canadian of Danish extraction
posted by CKmtl at 1:24 PM on November 17, 2008

I'm suspicious of his glossing faen as fuck. The first expression he translates as what the fuck, but fuck might just as well be hell or, for that matter, the devil -- it just makes the expression more emphatic. So what's the literal translation of the second expression, which he translates loosely as fuck you, if faen literally means something like 'the devil'?

Do they say something like faen in Hungary?

Well, for what it's worth, Wiktionary says Hungarian fan is "(obsolete)", and used only in the expression fanszőrzet 'pubic hair'.

(You realize Hungarian is related to Finnish, which doesn't have a cognate of faen, and not to the Scandinavian langauges, right?)
posted by The Tensor at 1:29 PM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Nicky, fene is a pretty standard (but mild) Hungarian curse (it's more-or-less equivalent to "hell" but as cursewords so often are, it tends to be a building block in more elaborate constructions). But I wouldn't expect it's related to the Norwegian/Swedish word, which wouldn't likely be of Finno-Ugric origin.

And those languages didn't descend from Finland into Europe, rather the other way, coming from Asia, across the Urals, leaving a deposit in the plains of Hungary and sending another tribe on to the north.
posted by Wolfdog at 1:35 PM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

Metafilter: brief image of copulating turtles
posted by 5MeoCMP at 1:57 PM on November 17, 2008

I wonder how you say "copulating turtles" in norwegian? Something, something skilpadde, I think. In finnish? According to Tvärslå, "turtle" in finnish is "kilpikonna". Awesome. Danish? Anybody? In swedish it's "sköldpaddor som parar sig", by the way.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 2:32 PM on November 17, 2008

"I saw..."="Näin parittelevia kilpikonnia / kilpikonnia parittelemassa / parittelevat kilpikonnat / kilpikonnien parittelevan" or "images of" = "kuvia parittelevista kilpikonnista". "pari"="couple".
posted by Free word order! at 3:21 PM on November 17, 2008

lh, how did the Finno-Ugric languages get so far south west to Hungary without spreading to the other countries around it?

Wolfdog gives the basic idea; you can read more here, and there's a nice map here.

Do they say something like faen in Hungary?

As The Tensor says, Hungarian is unrelated to the Scandahoovian Germanic languages, but (as my curses book says) "Hungarians are famous wielders of obscenity, and many of their favorite curses involve the motehr (anya), so much so that there is a term for such curses, anyázás." A basic Hungarian curse word (shared with much of Eastern Europe) is kurva 'whore'; the Great Hungarian Curse is lófasz a seggedbe! 'a horsecock up your ass!' (pronounced more or less LOW-fawss aw SHAG-ged-beh).

Thanks for filling out my thin post with your great links and commentary, nickyskye! (And thanks as well to Free word order! and ValkoSipuliSuola for hilarious links.)
posted by languagehat at 3:24 PM on November 17, 2008

Danish language as perceived by Norwegians.

The written forms of Norwegian and Danish are very similar, but the spoken form of Danish is so weird that they don't understand each other. (Or so the myth goes.)
posted by Dumsnill at 3:41 PM on November 17, 2008

Copulating turtles:

Skilpadder som har seg (turtles getting it on)
Skilpadder som parrer seg (turtles mating)
Skilpadder som knuller (turtles fucking)
Skilpadder som har søt, søt elskov (turtles making sweet, sweet love)
posted by flippant at 4:31 PM on November 17, 2008

(...brief image of copulating turtles.)

COME ON...LOAD FASTER ALREADY....DAMMIT....
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 4:49 PM on November 17, 2008

BOLLANDE SKILDPADDER! a Swede attempting Danish. Que laughing and pointing from the Danes in the thread.
posted by dabitch at 5:52 PM on November 17, 2008

The one thing all of the (other) Scandinavians can agree on is mocking the Finns. Ah, those crazy Finns.

I'm very grateful for this new word that I may incorporate into my work-life without fear of being fired for offending the precious young ears of children. Then again, I am uttering something in Norwegian, so perhaps that's worse.

Don't kill me. My family is Swedish. I'm obligated by law and birthright to impugn the good country of Norway at every possible opportunity.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 6:26 PM on November 17, 2008

and annoy Danes, who will find that the dapper hat-wearing, glasses-doffing Norwegian mispronounces their favorite curse word

Du er fandeneme en dum Norsker, du kan ikke udtale "Fanden" rigtige.

Actually I thought it was pretty good although it sounds like he tries to pronounce the silent 'd', which is wrong, but otherwise a perfect Brønshøj pitch.

I'm suspicious of his glossing faen as fuck. The first expression he translates as what the fuck, but fuck might just as well be hell or, for that matter, the devil -- it just makes the expression more emphatic

Maybe he takes into account the frequency of the word as used in the respective languages. 'Faen' and 'fuck' are both the most used I'd say, and having pobably the same level of impact.

So what's the literal translation of the second expression, which he translates loosely as fuck you, if faen literally means something like 'the devil'?

'May the devil take you'. I'd say it's as close to spot on as possible, in terms of meaning and usage.

BOLLANDE SKILDPADDER! a Swede attempting Danish. Que laughing and pointing from the Danes in the thread.
posted by dabitch at 1:52 AM on November 18 [+] [!]

*Dutifully points. Laughs.*
All scandinavians live by a sacred covenant to mock and laugh at the other countries populations grapefruitmoon. It is the best signifier of whether a country is truly scandinavian if the other scandics spend much energy thinking up insults involving that country's population.
posted by Catfry at 7:59 PM on November 17, 2008

Interesting, Perkele was just a skygod like Thor, the Christian missionaries made him a devil, which made it a curse word.

Sad, really. Someone should try to reclaim the name for the sake of finnish cultural heritage.
posted by empath at 9:00 PM on November 17, 2008 [1 favorite]

(You realize Hungarian is related to Finnish, which doesn't have a cognate of faen, and not to the Scandinavian langauges, right?)

d'oh. *smacks forehead. Now I do. Thanks The Tensor. I guess I got into a little global knot there, not thinking clearly. I do that sometimes, lol. And thanks Wolfdog and languagehat for the additional information. Lots of fun, er faen, learning here. lh, your post isn't remotely "thin" it's delightfully just right in its simplicity.
posted by nickyskye at 9:02 PM on November 17, 2008

All scandinavians live by a sacred covenant to mock and laugh at the other countries populations grapefruitmoon.

Don't I know it. My mom's family is all of Swedish descent and I learned so many Sven & Ole jokes as a kid that I was surprised to know that mocking Norwegians was not a *universal* pastime.

Also, I lived in Iceland where national sports involved remarking on how the Finns are always drunk and how Danish sounds like Icelandic spoken by a retarded sheep. I do firmly believe that both of these are true.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 3:48 AM on November 18, 2008

Actually I thought it was pretty good although it sounds like he tries to pronounce the silent 'd', which is wrong, but otherwise a perfect Brønshøj pitch.

The emphasis on the terminal N also sounds wrong to my raised-on-Ødense/Fyn-speak ears.

All scandinavians live by a sacred covenant to mock and laugh at the other countries populations

Hell, not just countries, but regions too. My mother's family came over in the 50s and I still hear the occasional jab at Bornholmers (Newfoundland:Canada::Bornholm:Denmark, apparently).
posted by CKmtl at 10:06 AM on November 18, 2008

I thought I had come across Rødgrød med Fløde here on MeFi, but a search reveals nothing. So try the first link (click on the words), then a YouTube of the real thing.
posted by ancientgower at 2:00 PM on November 18, 2008

You did.
posted by CKmtl at 2:08 PM on November 18, 2008

Ah, here we go, found it. Here is a perfect short course in foul-mouthed Hungarian.
posted by Wolfdog at 5:46 AM on November 22, 2008