Comments on: Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil.

Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil.

WCityMike — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:37:41 -0800

"Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil." Alex Graven, 9, has had How to Talk to Girls, the runaway hit of the Soaring Hawk Elementary School book fair, picked up by HarperCollins. How do you spot these oil-guzzling cars? ""It is easy to spot pretty girls," Alex writes, "because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry."

Alex's techniques are already landing him the ladies: he advises his guys to "comb your hair and don't wear sweats" and to "control your hyperness (cut down on sugar if you need to)." Alex tells his fellow guys that "[t]he best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you." (Unfortunately, Alex still may be naive in some areas, as he tells his readers, "Girls like the smartest boys.") How to approach them? "If I say hi and you say hi back, we're probably off to a good start." When asked why he wrote the book, "Well, I saw a lot of boys having trouble to get girls to like them, so I thought this book will like probably help them."

By: WCityMike

WCityMike — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:38:31 -0800

Speaking of which, sorry for the "boyzone" post (wah wah wah waaaaaaaah).

By: msali

msali — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:43:15 -0800

Do you suppose he watched that show, the Pickup Artist?

By: Ironmouth

Ironmouth — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:43:55 -0800

From the article, the picture at the bar seems to indicate that he belongs to the "get 'em drunk" school of meeting women.

By: Floydd

Floydd — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:44:31 -0800

"Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil." Boy, he's got that right. And new rings won't help a bit.

By: cavalier

cavalier — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:45:22 -0800

This is a movie. In X years he's going to get all the chicks. In X+Y years he's going to have that denouement and realize he's all alone because he controls his relationships and he won't let anyone in to see the real Alex. In X+Y+Z years he's going to go back to the first girl from X-A who he really wanted but couldn't get with and he's going to try to establish a relationship but she's currently with someone but she's not happy with that person. Finally in AA they get together and roll credits.

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:46:21 -0800

The girls are only after him for his allowance.

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:46:38 -0800

It's Alex Greven. Here's his interview with Ellen DeGeneres. His book publishing deal resulted from an earlier appearance with her.

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:46:54 -0800

The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. You heard the boy. Men, please form an orderly line to my right.

By: cal71

cal71 — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:48:36 -0800

I feel quite sure that somewhere in LA people are talking about optioning this book for film. sigh.

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:48:47 -0800

Do you suppose he watched that show, the Pickup Artist? Judging from that stable of hos in the video, I'm guessing American Pimp.

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:50:35 -0800

It's Alex Greven. Meant to say: his name is actually Alec Greven, not Alex Graven.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:51:49 -0800

he wants to be a full-time writer when he grows up, with a weekend job in archaeology or paleontology. Finally, somebody gets the order right!

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:52:25 -0800

CNN's interview with Alec.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:53:21 -0800

"Girls like the smartest boys." Some girls do.

By: emelenjr

emelenjr — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:53:24 -0800

Do you suppose he wears a child-size fedora?

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:53:39 -0800

Sadly, fame has already turned him into Hugh Hefner.

By: Brandon Blatcher

Brandon Blatcher — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 13:59:36 -0800

Dating - which he defines as going out to dinner without your parents - is for "kind of old" people, who are 15 or 16. Adorable.

By: sciurus

sciurus — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:00:40 -0800

I bet you he's gay.

By: gyc

gyc — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:01:30 -0800

Sadly, fame has already turned him into Hugh Hefner. Nah, the girls pictures haven't all dyed their hair platinum blonde or gotten breast implants yet.

By: smackfu

smackfu — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:01:56 -0800

Heh, the NY Post has the Miss World 2008 Beach Wear Competition listed under the "News" heading.

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:02:07 -0800

In his interview with Ellen on Monday he mentioned that he has a deal for three more books aith HarperCollins: How toTalk to Mom, How to Talk to Dad, and How to Talk to Santa.

By: availablelight

availablelight — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:03:20 -0800

At least this kind of gendered "wisdom" is coming from an actual grade schooler.

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:03:52 -0800

the girls pictures haven't all dyed their hair platinum blonde or gotten breast implants yet. I was going to think up a "pubic hair" joke here until I realized I was grossing myself out.

By: bonehead

bonehead — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:04:13 -0800

The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. You are eating your Wheaties and Grapenuts, right?

By: dbiedny

dbiedny — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:04:42 -0800

I think the story is cute and all, but... Those pictures of the kid in the bar, whispering to the gal with the beer bottle in hand - is it me, or do you think that if it was a nine year old girl whispering to a 20-something guy with a beer bottle in hand, well, there would be something closer to a shitstorm kind of response? We live in a weird society, is all I'm saying.

By: robtf3

robtf3 — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:05:04 -0800

I could have used this book when I was a teenager.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:07:09 -0800

I could have used this book when I was a teenager. It's probably better than the one I stumbled upon.

By: aliceinreality

aliceinreality — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:07:23 -0800

"Girls like the smartest boys." Some girls do. This girl does.

By: jokeefe

jokeefe — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:10:30 -0800

FFS.

By: rocket88

rocket88 — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:13:44 -0800

comb your hair and don't wear sweats I am now combed and pantsless. *waits for girls*

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:15:14 -0800

do you think that if it was a nine year old girl whispering to a 20-something guy with a beer bottle in hand, well, there would be something closer to a shitstorm kind of response? Adult male with underage female = Disgust Adult female with underage male = Titillation Hope this helps.

By: Saxon Kane

Saxon Kane — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:16:02 -0800

Am I wrong for wanting to punch this kid (or his parents)?

By: delmoi

delmoi — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:16:36 -0800

s it me, or do you think that if it was a nine year old girl whispering to a 20-something guy with a beer bottle in hand, well, there would be something closer to a shitstorm kind of response? We live in a weird society, is all I'm saying. What's weird about that? Are you saying it's unusual for there to be double standards for different genders, or that society is strange for having them?

By: EmpressCallipygos

EmpressCallipygos — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:16:44 -0800

This is surreal, because on the one hand the whole idea of a nine-year-old writing a dating book is very HURF DURF PRECOCIOUS PICKUP ARTIST, but on the other hand, the things he's saying in that book make a lot of sense, and he does seem to be very much aware of his...kid-ness ("dating's for people who are older...say, 15"). So this is somehow both weird and adorable at the same time.

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:17:54 -0800

Metafilter: Both weird and adorable at the same time

By: jeffburdges

jeffburdges — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:18:38 -0800

Seems relevant.

By: seagull.apollo

seagull.apollo — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:18:46 -0800

Am I wrong for wanting to punch this kid (or his parents)? I don't really understand why you'd want to. He wrote a book, it was funny and interesting, and it got published.

By: box

box — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:19:09 -0800

Man, even 9-year-olds know more about dating than I do.

By: naju

naju — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:22:41 -0800

So this is somehow both weird and adorable at the same time. This is exactly the response he wants. Wow, this kid is a genius.

By: Cat Pie Hurts

Cat Pie Hurts — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:26:35 -0800

Am I the only one that finds this icky and creepy as all fuck?

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:27:14 -0800

This is exactly the response he wants. For now, maybe. I suspect that by the time getting laid becomes his main preoccupation - as it does for every 9 year old boy sooner or later - he'll find the "weird and adorable" niche much less satisfying.

By: 23skidoo

23skidoo — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:30:25 -0800

Dear Alex: Don't hate on pretty people. Hate on assholes, whether they be pretty or regular. Sincerely, The Society for the Advancement of the Notion that People can be Both Attractive and Pleasant

By: An Infinity Of Monkeys

An Infinity Of Monkeys — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:30:32 -0800

"Am I wrong for wanting to punch this kid (or his parents)?" Probably. We suspect you're externalizing a self-directed anger at never having been published yourself, and projecting it against this kid (or his parents). But we've never been published either, so we could be guilty of the same thing.

By: davejay

davejay — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:33:00 -0800

Hey, some parents have their kids do catalog modeling or whatnot when they're young, to bank some cash for college later -- but most of those kids don't end up with a career as a model in their adulthood. Here we've got a 9-year-old kid who is banking some cash for college by actually doing what he wants to do in his adult life, and the odds of being a successful writer are higher than being a successful model -- especially since he's apparently a very good observer. Good on this kid, more power to him.

By: secondhand

secondhand — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:33:30 -0800

From this... "Product Description This is the true story of the pimp. The story of the smells, the sounds, the fears and the petty triumphs of his world. Told without moralising and with no pretence of bitterness, Iceberg Slim relates his twenty-five years in the Game, from the building up of stables to losing himself on scag." mmmmm... the Smells.

By: Nelson

Nelson — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:33:49 -0800

Look, the little boy is talking like an adult! Isn't he precious?

By: naju

naju — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:35:17 -0800

he'll find the "weird and adorable" niche much less satisfying. In a few years, he can work the "Yeah, I wrote a best-selling dating book when I was 9, but that part of my life is over now" angle.

By: liza

liza — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:36:43 -0800

i smell a hoax. have no proof, just a tingling in my bullshit detecting gland :)

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:37:40 -0800

Am I wrong for wanting to punch this kid (or his parents)? Why don't you punch Ellen DeGeneres? After all she gave him the platform to get his hand-written book which he had distributed at his school to get noticed by HarperCollins. His thanking her for doing such is adorable.

By: malocchio

malocchio — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:39:05 -0800

I recently came upon the cookbook of kid's recipes that the school put together back when I was in kindergarten. Now I've always wanted to make chocolate chip cookies from scratch, so I figured I'd give it a shot. Five sticks of butter for a dozen cookies seemed like a lot, but hey, I'm no chef. Well, I'm certainly not going to make that mistake again. Screw you, kid!

By: liza

liza — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:41:06 -0800

Saxon Kane : No. Just queue to the left of me, please :)

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:43:27 -0800

"How to Talk to Girls began life as part of a creative writing project in Greven's 3rd grade class. The resulting handwritten pamphlet was sold for $5 at the Soaring Hawk Elementary School book fair in Castle Rock, Colorado. Greven's success snowballed from there, after his dating tips and advice were picked up by local news outlets. Ellen DeGeneres then invited Greven onto her talk show [on February 20, 2008] and a book deal was sealed with HarperCollins. The 46-page hardcover version hit shelves across the US last week."^*

By: IAmBroom

IAmBroom — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:43:45 -0800

"Am I wrong for wanting to punch this kid (or his parents)?" posted by Saxon Kane Yes. Am I the only one that finds this icky and creepy as all fuck? posted by Cat Pie Hurts No. I don't, but others willl. You heard the boy. Men, please form an orderly line to my right. posted by piratebowling Jak se máš? (Noticing that you've been to Prague...)

By: billyfleetwood

billyfleetwood — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:44:55 -0800

Am I the only one that finds this icky and creepy as all fuck? Nope. Add stupid, unnecessary, and demeaning to everyone involved to that list and we can start a club.

By: IAmBroom

IAmBroom — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:46:34 -0800

Just watched the Ellen clip on him. The little bro is donating some of the proceeds to a cancer foundation. Jeebus. My new hero is 9.

By: hellbient

hellbient — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:47:37 -0800

Writing a book is one thing. I'd like to see this kid use his "hi" gambit on a female two set in even a halfway decent club. I doubt he'd even get a kino, not to mention and IOI. AFC.

By: bookish

bookish — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:48:22 -0800

Dear Alex: Don't hate on pretty people. Hate on assholes, whether they be pretty or regular. Sincerely, The Society for the Advancement of the Notion that People can be Both Attractive and Pleasant Interestingly though, he defines "pretty girls" as the ones that have "have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry," and not as, say, blondes or slender girls or girls with symmetrical faces. Which implies that the girls he's talking about are not necessarily the very attractive girls, but the wealthy, stylish, or "girly" girls. Which brings up the issue of how socially determined our ideas of beauty are. To what extent can beauty be "bought" as a luxury good? To what extent is being a "pretty girl" about a certain set of behaviors and dress that can be put on and taken off? To what extent are some girls are socialized to be "pretty girls" and to both act and dress the part?

By: terranova

terranova — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:49:46 -0800

Oh dear. Am I in the wrong thread? Isn't this Dmitri Orlov's Stage 5, Cultural Collapse?

By: ShameSpiral

ShameSpiral — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:55:11 -0800

So. Fucking. Creepy. In this picture, it looks like the little girl he is chatting up is leaning against a lamp-post.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:56:59 -0800

i smell a hoax. have no proof, just a tingling in my bullshit detecting gland :) Your bullshit gland? Wouldn't that be... your anus?

By: klangklangston

klangklangston — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:57:59 -0800

"Those pictures of the kid in the bar, whispering to the gal with the beer bottle in hand - is it me, or do you think that if it was a nine year old girl whispering to a 20-something guy with a beer bottle in hand, well, there would be something closer to a shitstorm kind of response? We live in a weird society, is all I'm saying." Oh, don't be silly. A male child still has more power than an adult woman—that makes it OK!

By: jeff-o-matic

jeff-o-matic — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:59:34 -0800

Agreed this sounds like a hoax. At the very least EXTREMELY stage-managed by the parents looking for a book/movie/TV deal.

By: Araucaria

Araucaria — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:04:37 -0800

My interactions with girls improved dramatically when I stopped thinking about it as dating and started treating it as improv comedy.

By: mano

mano — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:04:51 -0800

Um, so when can we expect the obvious sequel, "How to talk to black people?"

By: Krrrlson

Krrrlson — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:06:01 -0800

Um, so when can we expect the obvious sequel, "How to talk to black people?" Who would ever want to do that?

By: Kutsuwamushi

Kutsuwamushi — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:16:37 -0800

I read that as "pretty girls are like cars and need lots of oil." While I don't disagree, I had to wonder what this nine-year-old had been up to.

By: longsleeves

longsleeves — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:24:05 -0800

From the NY Post link: Alec....just finished a children's book on the Watergate scandal Awesome. Next, the Florida recount, please, Alec.

By: turgid dahlia

turgid dahlia — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:26:58 -0800

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By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:30:48 -0800

it looks like the little girl he is chatting up is leaning against a lamp-post. Pimp hands come in all sizes.

By: mippy

mippy — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:35:07 -0800

The time will come

By: mothershock

mothershock — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:01:30 -0800

Agreed this sounds like a hoax. At the very least EXTREMELY stage-managed by the parents looking for a book/movie/TV deal. I don't know... Sometimes kids are just funny/weird. When my daughter was 7, she showed me the first edition of "Fashion Princess Magazine," something she had put together for her fashion-forward, second-grader friends. The table of contents read: "Fashion, Animals, Global Warming, and Tips for Taking Care of You." (I suppose I fell down on the job as a parent by not immediately trying to book her on Ellen, but them's the breaks.)

By: Marisa Stole the Precious Thing

Marisa Stole the Precious Thing — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:04:34 -0800

The thing I never like about "dating advice" in general is that much of it sounds like a lesson in insincerity. "To show that you're listening, furrow your brow as she talks, nod from time to time." That it's coming from a nine-year-old is even creepier. Yes, teach other boys to feign interest and seek easy targets, while they're still young.

By: MikeMc

MikeMc — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:09:43 -0800

Approves. ………………….._,,-~’’’¯¯¯’’~-,, ………………..,-‘’ ; ; ;_,,---,,_ ; ;’’-,…………………………….._,,,---,,_ sup /b/

By: turgid dahlia

turgid dahlia — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:10:30 -0800

Remember kids, you can practise sex at home with your G.I. Joe action figures.

By: oneirodynia

oneirodynia — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:12:14 -0800

*furrows brow, nods*

By: slimepuppy

slimepuppy — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:13:50 -0800

Bitches be trippin'.

By: liza

liza — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:29:24 -0800

delmoi, i thought the anus was a muscle, not a gland :) PEDOBEAR LIVES! mothershock, i wouldn't be shocked if the kids parents were indeed connected to the publishing or entertainment business.

By: not_on_display

not_on_display — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:36:49 -0800

His next book, "How to Convince Your Parents to Pay for an Abortion," has been opted by Miramax. Look for it in 2010.

By: Eekacat

Eekacat — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:51:58 -0800

From the article, the picture at the bar seems to indicate that he belongs to the "get 'em drunk" school of meeting women. posted by Ironmouth I wonder if he's learned about going ugly early?

By: Nattie

Nattie — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:56:10 -0800

I know I'm supposed to find things like this cute, but it just irritates me when kids try to act like adults.

By: Cat Pie Hurts

Cat Pie Hurts — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:56:53 -0800

"Remember kids, you can practise sex at home with your G.I. Joe action figures." I DID! But they would always wind up getting stuck up m...oh..forget it.

By: ericb

ericb — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:08:31 -0800

His next book, "How to Convince Your Parents to Pay for an Abortion," has been opted by Miramax. Tip #1: Hope your parents aren't Sarah and Todd Palin.

By: dgaicun

dgaicun — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:22:39 -0800

I'm pretty sure it was another 9 year old who first invented the "neg".

By: UbuRoivas

UbuRoivas — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:43:06 -0800

The Society for the Advancement of the Notion that People can be Both Attractive and Pleasant but Still be Totally Clueless When it Comes to Constructing a Pronounceable Acronym.

By: Calloused_Foot

Calloused_Foot — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:18:05 -0800

The best choice for most boys is a regular girl.
I should substitute bran muffins for roses?

By: lunit

lunit — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:39:13 -0800

Ellen is so awesome. And yeah, this is kindof weird.

By: UbuRoivas

UbuRoivas — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:49:45 -0800

I should substitute bran muffins for roses? hehe - i thought that was a metaphor!

By: Jilder

Jilder — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:53:39 -0800

How to To Talk To 9 Year Old Jilder (A Girl): Boy: Hey! Let's go ride bikes! Jilder: Cool! *goes rides bikes*

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 19:06:03 -0800

IAmBroom, I'd approve but you should have used the polite form. Just what kind of regular girl do you thing I am?!

By: me & my monkey

me & my monkey — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 19:29:24 -0800

But we've never been published either posted by An Infinity Of Monkeys Not even as Shakespeare?

By: BabySeven

BabySeven — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 20:22:46 -0800

Kids pretending to be adults isn't cute. It's just terribly creepy. I hope this doesn't spark a trend in 'how to do things I won't need to do for another eight years' books. I look forward to reading a ten year old girl's view on how to raise children while working in an office environment.

By: Snyder

Snyder — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 20:33:10 -0800

I hope this doesn't spark a trend in 'how to do things I won't need to do for another eight years' books. I know I wanted to know how to talk to girls when I was nine. (And not just in the regular way, but the "talk to girls I 'like like' way, not just a 'like' way.) I certainly didn't wait until I was 17.

By: punchdrunkhistory

punchdrunkhistory — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 21:25:33 -0800

Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil. e.e. cummings felt the same way.

By: adamdschneider

adamdschneider — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 21:26:29 -0800

Oh, Jesus Christ. Volguus Zildrohar, the Pedobear, has come. We have chosen and will now perish. Grab your rifles and run; this place has gone tits up.

By: davejay

davejay — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 00:02:02 -0800

Kids pretending to be adults isn't cute. It's just terribly creepy. I disagree. Today, my 3-year-old son brought my 3-year-old daughter a blanket and stuffed animals, and helped her get tucked in on the couch, told her to go to sleep, and sang her a lullaby while she pretended to be a baby. It was so cute my brain melted. Kids pretending to be adults in the context of dating doesn't need to be creepy either; a nine-year-old giving another nine-year-old some flowers, asking her out on a "date" and holding their hand isn't creepy at all. However, kids pretending to be adults with adults is most definitely creepy as fuck. Case in point: when I was a teen, a friend and his older brother opened their house to epic drinking parties when their parents were out of town. Thing was, they also had to take care of their 9-year-old brother, and (since we were all around fifteen years old) they didn't see any problem with the kid hanging around. That meant he sometimes got hold of and drank alcohol remnants from glasses, and observed the wacky drunk behavior of the partygoers. So I'm at one of these parties, and the kid is being shooed out of the party rooms as per usual (and as per usual sneaking back in) and he's got himself worked up. He sees this girl standing in the doorframe of a bedroom, nursing a drink. So he runs across the room, slams into her, knocking her drink on the floor and her onto the bed. She's trying to shove him off, and he's trying to stay on top of her, shouting "it's okay, I'm not as young as I look, I'm really eleven!" Creepy as fuck, and happily, that was the final straw for several partygoers, who left and then told the parents when they came back to town.

By: UbuRoivas

UbuRoivas — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 02:14:26 -0800

oh, so those were the assholes who spoiled my fun!

By: louche mustachio

louche mustachio — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 08:42:26 -0800

I'm pretty sure it was another 9 year old who first invented the "neg". "You're really pretty. It's too bad you have all those cooties."

By: flipyourwig

flipyourwig — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 10:29:49 -0800

Kids these days. Sheesh.

By: mandymanwasregistered

mandymanwasregistered — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 12:15:02 -0800

Perhaps I should channel my nine year old self and write something for bookish not so girly girls on how to talk to boys. Lesson one: no matter how cute they may be, don't bother with the boys who hang around the girls who wear pretty dresses and sparkly earrings because they won't be interested in you until your 10th high school reunion and by then you'll have moved on. Or so I've heard.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 16:06:33 -0800

"You're really pretty. It's too bad you have all those cooties." I first read that as "too bad you have all those clothes." Which would be oddly endearing if one had consumed enough alcohol and was not alone.