WHY DO YOU HATE ME, GOD?

December 24, 2008 6:55 AM

Popdose presents: The Worst Christmas Music Ever: Mellowmas 2 Manilowmas 3Jarreaumas 4 Sarajevomas...? 5 A Little River Christmas 6 Boltonmas! 7 Scatmas! 8 Tuxedomas 9 Fats? 10 The Singing Saw at Mellowmas Time 11 A New Jack Mellowmas 12 A Very New Kids Arseniomas 13 Hayo! Haya! 14 Sweet Little Andymas 15 Dollytoe 16 Into the Ear of Mellowmas Madness 17 Mellowmas Goes South 18 The Unimaginable Mellowmas 19 Archiemas! 20 VERGISSMEINNICHT!! 21 Sedakamas 22 Double Duvall! 23 Liberace and the Christmas Vest 24 Mellowmas Eve
posted by chuckdarwin (18 comments total)

YES! This is awesome.
posted by Bageena at 7:07 AM on December 24, 2008

It's not the worst if it doesn't include this.
posted by Mcable at 7:12 AM on December 24, 2008 [4 favorites has favorites]

Mcable, THANKS! That was so fucked it up that it was beautiful. Something about bad singing on Crimbo really warms my cockles. Truly, truly awful.
posted by chuckdarwin at 7:17 AM on December 24, 2008

What, no Gunther?
posted by empath at 7:30 AM on December 24, 2008

Ha! I see your mellowmas and raise you:
Santa Needs Some Lovin', by, god help us, Lynyrd Skynyrd
and the ineffable, indescribable Tiny Tim: Santa Claus Has Got the AIDS This Year.

I'm sorry. I had to do it.
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:35 AM on December 24, 2008 [2 favorites has favorites]

Not complete without Jingle Rock Bell.
posted by odinsdream at 7:40 AM on December 24, 2008

Ha! I see your mellowmas and raise you:
Santa Needs Some Lovin', by, god help us, Lynyrd Skynyrd

The original(?) by Albert King is AWESOME and anyone who says different gets a lump of coal.

At relativistic speed.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:41 AM on December 24, 2008

Oh night diviiiiiiiii.

Iiine.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:05 AM on December 24, 2008

Not complete without Jingle Rock Bell.

UNTRUE! For this post is dedicated the TEH SUX0RS, and Jingle Rock Bell is made of teh PURE AWESOME.
posted by mwhybark at 8:18 AM on December 24, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

*cough*
posted by The Straightener at 8:44 AM on December 24, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

Damn! I hang my head in holiday shame - I finally RT(whole)FA and there's Skynyrd, duly noted. Oh well.
posted by mygothlaundry at 8:51 AM on December 24, 2008

plenty more where that came from
posted by destro at 8:55 AM on December 24, 2008

Betcha didn't know that Even Squeaky Fromme Loves Christmas.
posted by Sailormom at 8:55 AM on December 24, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

Oh god, those Shelly Duvall tracks are horrid.
posted by destro at 9:46 AM on December 24, 2008

I refuse to listen to any of the links, but if one of them isn't Manheim Steamroller, it's a damned lie!
posted by stet at 10:10 AM on December 24, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

McCartney + Venture Bros. + Kevin Smith = Grotesquely Awesome
posted by wendell at 10:27 AM on December 24, 2008

How can you do Christmas songs on the singing saw and leave out "I Sawed Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"?
posted by jonp72 at 12:07 PM on December 24, 2008

The Straightener: Oh wow. That was so awful. And yet, exactly what 'moonMan needs for Christmas. THNX.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 4:53 PM on December 24, 2008