Watch your ass marchFirst!

May 19, 2001 11:28 PM

Watch your ass marchFirst! Here comes WebTek Systems, "Premier Internet design services" aka the "Hello Ladies" of web development. Don't miss their client list, it's all eye candy.
via Cool Homepages
posted by Brilliantcrank (20 comments total)

Just a kid who's trying to make a buck out of the web. They'll learn. Think of it as the modern variant of the 1c lemonade stand....
posted by fvw at 11:31 PM on May 19, 2001

That just looks too damn wrong and bad. Especially their 1-800 number. If this isn't a hoax/parody, I'd be very surprised. Too many misspellings, bad HTML, blatant support for the worst features of the web. It's a gag.
posted by kokogiak at 11:53 PM on May 19, 2001

Yeah, the A Team theme kinda put it over the top for me.
posted by kindall at 12:06 AM on May 20, 2001

AAAAGHHHH! MY EYES! MY EYES!!!!!!
posted by Dirjy at 12:15 AM on May 20, 2001

any website with a dancing chick is okay with me! this is what i needed to end my night.
posted by ggggarret at 12:26 AM on May 20, 2001

I believe it's a joke by humorchannel.com. Last time I looked it was hosted on their site, but they've moved it to Geocities.
posted by timbooker at 2:48 AM on May 20, 2001

Damn...that %&*@ing midi file locked my IE 6 beta...
posted by canoeguide at 2:56 AM on May 20, 2001

It is indeed a pisstake, as evidenced by the line:

We have pushed MacDraw farther than anyone to squeeze out the most attractive graphics on the web for our clients. We should know how to do it by now, since we'v ebeen using MAc Draw for 11 years, longer than anyone.

Sadly, the irritating background images on the tips pages and client page are so effectively appalling that I had real trouble reading the text on top. Aargh, who knows what gems of sardony and sarcasm I'm missing?
posted by MUD at 3:08 AM on May 20, 2001

heh... Even if they're a hoax, they're probably financially better off than marchFirst. Filing for liquidation of assets isn't great news, esp. when they've borrowed millions in the past year.

Viva MacDraw!
posted by salsamander at 7:45 AM on May 20, 2001

Looks like the designers from Budd Uggly found a new home.
posted by dogwelder at 9:10 AM on May 20, 2001

Hguraaaahhhpphhh...

One of the few things in the world that made me puke instantaniously...reminicient of Tim Roth in Four Rooms.

And this guy has DESIGN TIPS!! I like it when people put poorly animated gifs of Goofy on their page.
posted by deathonion at 9:29 AM on May 20, 2001

It really hurts me that you guys would think this is fake.
posted by rodii at 10:07 AM on May 20, 2001

Wow!
posted by me myself and i at 10:19 AM on May 20, 2001

its been done, and better, too. anybody remember "bud uggly web design"? that guy cracked me up, with his 'drive-thru web page window' and the 'web tan' page. wwwvoice.com... great stuff. now all gone...
posted by quonsar at 11:03 AM on May 20, 2001

Okay, one more time: there's a mirror of Bud Uglly Design. Sunglasses recommended.
posted by Aaaugh! at 1:08 PM on May 20, 2001

Now why didn't I think about "asii" art! Do you have any idea how much money I could have saved from buying all those upgrades to Photoshop? First I miss the whole MacDraw idea and now this. I'm surprised clients even paid me for my work.

From their web site:
FASTER PICTURES!!!!!!!
Art that is made up of only text and not pictures will load faster on the internet. Only Bud Uglly Design offers this high end feature. Here are some of the simples of asii art that Bud Uglly Design can impliment on your new webpages. (if you order a webpage)

posted by Brilliantcrank at 10:42 PM on May 20, 2001

BLESS ZEUS THAT I HAD SPEARED MY PUPILS BEFORE CLICKING THAT LINK! WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE SAVED MY EYESIGHT (AND MY SOUL) BY BLINDING MYSELF. okay enough sarcasm. but i truly feel sick now.
posted by wantwit at 12:26 AM on May 21, 2001

Two points. First, do y'all realize that many people, perhaps even MOST people would not be offended by this guy's aesthetics?

Second, gsxl, Since marchFirst is now in Chapter11, shouldn't you have called this post something else?
posted by ParisParamus at 8:20 AM on May 21, 2001

Paris, I think you are missing the point of this thread and the title entirely. Perhaps you should check out the Rush Limbaugh topic, you might find better pasture there. %)
posted by Brilliantcrank at 8:40 AM on May 21, 2001

Oh my. I have seen some bad web design, but the flashing just pushes it way over the edge of bad taste. I'm so glad there is no history of epilepsy in my family, or this might have triggered an episode Pikachu style.
posted by Azaroth at 9:58 PM on May 21, 2001