A fistful of Rikers.

January 31, 2009 4:54 AM

Star Trek TNG goes horribly wrong in a series of short, surreal and very zen mashups: Episode 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13
posted by loquacious (102 comments total)

1 and 6 both link to 6.
Here's 1.
posted by D.C. at 4:57 AM on January 31, 2009 [2 favorites]

Number 2 is fucking hilarious.

I'm only at Number 2.
posted by patr1ck at 4:59 AM on January 31, 2009 [3 favorites]

These are awesome. Somebody had way too much time on their hands.
posted by Dasein at 5:03 AM on January 31, 2009

"We are exploring the unknown"
posted by null terminated at 5:11 AM on January 31, 2009

Okay, that was fun.
posted by nax at 5:12 AM on January 31, 2009

MetaFilter: Uhhgggg.
posted by patr1ck at 5:13 AM on January 31, 2009

"Computer freeze program!"

Hah, been there.
posted by Space Coyote at 5:14 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

Wow. I have watched all of these.

I feel dirty.
posted by multivalent at 5:23 AM on January 31, 2009

These are all extremely great. I await a TNG nerd to explain what's the deal with Data and the paintings in the latter videos.
posted by flatluigi at 5:26 AM on January 31, 2009

Awesome. Very funny. I think he/she/they must've gotten inspiration from Fensler Film's G.I. Joe parodies from a few years ago. Pork chop sandwiches!
posted by zardoz at 5:27 AM on January 31, 2009 [2 favorites]

A strange and fascinating new frontier in editing.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:32 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

"Data's painting is making me dizzy."

These are much, much funnier than they have any right to be.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:33 AM on January 31, 2009 [3 favorites]

Stop. Stop. Stop it. Stop.
posted by steef at 5:40 AM on January 31, 2009 [10 favorites]

I've had to take a break after number six. I can't cope with all of them in a row. My other half is perplexed.
posted by ArmyOfKittens at 5:42 AM on January 31, 2009

Clever, but #4 is easily the funniest of the bunch, in my opinion.
posted by EarBucket at 5:46 AM on January 31, 2009

Holy crap, these are hilarious.
posted by 2or3whiskeysodas at 5:47 AM on January 31, 2009

I feel a very sick sense of pride that I can identify the majority of these episodes on clips alone.
posted by cavalier at 5:52 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

These are awesome. Also, I probably count as a TNG nerd, but there's really not much to explain. Data's paintings factor into quite a few episodes, and when they're replaced by creepy furry porn and bad paintings, the result is hilarious.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 6:06 AM on January 31, 2009 [2 favorites]

I laughed out loud.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 6:34 AM on January 31, 2009

You know, I don't think that those were edited by Brannon Braga. He has a certain touch; it's in the transitions.
posted by XMLicious at 6:41 AM on January 31, 2009

Dammit, I love #6. Got me laughing out loud; not easy to do.
posted by Guy_Inamonkeysuit at 6:48 AM on January 31, 2009

very funny
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 6:52 AM on January 31, 2009

10 was where I broke down and actually LOLed.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 7:20 AM on January 31, 2009

I wish Star Trek were like this all the time. Riker on Riker action can only lead to more bad acting.
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 7:22 AM on January 31, 2009 [3 favorites]

This is truly excellent.
posted by Fleebnork at 7:38 AM on January 31, 2009

Thanks loquacious! These are great.
posted by frecklefaerie at 7:54 AM on January 31, 2009

I lost my shit on #12.

"Captain, take a look at this."

Good stuff.
posted by seanbickford at 7:59 AM on January 31, 2009 [3 favorites]

Very funny stuff...

Now how about a little Dwarf Trek?
posted by Catblack at 8:02 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

They just keep getting better and better - but 4 is a classic, for sure!
posted by adrianhon at 8:08 AM on January 31, 2009

I enjoyed that narrative arc where Data starts painting all those bestiality/cartoon superhero erotica scenes. Gold.
posted by pepcorn at 8:11 AM on January 31, 2009

#10 was amazingly funny.
posted by Science! at 8:17 AM on January 31, 2009

One more. *checks clock* Okay, one more.... Well, one more. *checks again* One more! My god these are funny! One more!! *Checks cl

Jeez. I guess its okay if I'm just a little late for work.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 8:19 AM on January 31, 2009 [2 favorites]

I am in copious amounts of physical pain right now.
posted by cthuljew at 8:21 AM on January 31, 2009

These are absolutely brilliant. I lost it when Riker put on Geordi's visor.
posted by wastelands at 8:27 AM on January 31, 2009 [3 favorites]

#3 and #5 got me giggling. It might have been the booze, but damn, they're funny.
posted by Ghidorah at 8:33 AM on January 31, 2009

Three and 10 made me absolutely lose it.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 8:34 AM on January 31, 2009

Excellent, these are great. I had to watch them all and now I missed my train. I'll have to explain I was watching some hot riker-on-riker action to my friends who are waiting for me.
posted by sebas at 8:35 AM on January 31, 2009

LOL
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:42 AM on January 31, 2009 [5 favorites]

Man. I might as well give up, and go back to bed. The weekend can only go downhill from here.
posted by fontophilic at 8:54 AM on January 31, 2009

TNG is

GEE NEE UUSS

these mashups are the space in between

the ur wormhole of the federation

the ultimate question being

only 13?!?!?!?
posted by doobiedoo at 9:05 AM on January 31, 2009

they should put these on before spaceghost
posted by kliuless at 9:10 AM on January 31, 2009

okay dribbling now
posted by doobiedoo at 9:14 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

Holy fuck knuckles #12 is the best, hands down, show's over.

The fact that there is a story arc makes them all that much funnier.
posted by Science! at 9:39 AM on January 31, 2009

Oh, God, this was among Data's paintings at 0:34 of #10.

THIS POST WASN'T REALLY ABOUT TNG, WAS IT? THE ELECTION IS OVER. TAKE A REST ALREADY.

*snort*
posted by maudlin at 9:40 AM on January 31, 2009

This contest is over, give these men the $10,000 dollars!
posted by greenland at 9:41 AM on January 31, 2009

AWESOME

That is all.
posted by SirOmega at 9:45 AM on January 31, 2009

this should be a competitive sport. i'd pay money to see the 'prize fight'!
posted by Submiqent at 10:21 AM on January 31, 2009

thank you thank you thank you
posted by odacrem at 10:47 AM on January 31, 2009

That was very funny. Thanks.
posted by vronsky at 11:31 AM on January 31, 2009

My hands-down favorite was the holodeck one. Just the fear in Picard's voice as he's dealing with huge grunting Rikers ... "COMPUTER FREEZE PROGRAM!"

I don't think this has ever made Metafilter, but it's an appropriate enough post to link to. Pre-Internet, there was a bloopers reel going around called "STTNG: Totally Naked" (never fear AND/OR don't get your hopes up) which I daresay was compiled by the Next Gen people themselves (probably for a Christmas party or something). Naturally, it made its way to YouTube: Part 1, Part 2. You want to talk about hysterical dialog juxtaposition and funny musical backgrounds ...
posted by WCityMike at 11:39 AM on January 31, 2009

These are too good. Number 5 had me weeping.
posted by vronsky at 11:46 AM on January 31, 2009

Fave moments:

"U.S.S. Stargazer ... well, for God's sake, Mary, they built this thing in Bedford Falls!"

"You would not be upset to ... FUCK!" [Riker looks at the camera with an expectant face.]

And the appearance of the V lizard baby ...

posted by WCityMike at 11:47 AM on January 31, 2009

All this time, I didn't think that people actually spit their drinks on their keyboards when they saw something funny on the internet. I thought it was just a figure of speech.

Then Geordi tumbled out of the turbolift, Picard said "Welcome to the bridge", and I learned the truth.
posted by Clandestine Outlawry at 11:57 AM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

The first link is NSFW. Dunno about the rest.
posted by zippy at 12:04 PM on January 31, 2009

If there were an infinite number of these I would probably be sitting here slowly dying from thirst and mirth several days from now.
posted by MetaMonkey at 12:08 PM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

Number 7 takes all that is great about number two, adding shock!
"Computer end program" he screamed desperately.
Number 8 made me cry.....I am still laughing.
I hope TNG Cast are getting these in their email, and pissing themselves.
posted by QueerAngel28 at 12:15 PM on January 31, 2009

Patr1ick: Number 2 is fucking hilarious.

XQUZYPHYR: 10 was where I broke down and actually LOLed.

Science!: Holy fuck knuckles #12 is the best, hands down, show's over.

Something something mumble something... Even numbered Trek stuff... Must be some sort of cosmic law...
posted by Avelwood at 12:48 PM on January 31, 2009

#9 was particularly funny, and #12 was frickin' hi-larious!
posted by astroworm at 1:03 PM on January 31, 2009

Okay, number five had a certain David Lynch quality to it that made me want to watch it over and over... I guess even the odd numbered ones have their place.
posted by Avelwood at 1:08 PM on January 31, 2009

This is what we need to email Wil Wheaton.
posted by Pronoiac at 1:28 PM on January 31, 2009

This is why the Internet was invented. I laughed out loud at the first five, but when "Hit 'Em Up" started playing in #6 I nearly ran out of breath. Then Data and the furry porn... oh, man. This is some inspired shit.
posted by DecemberBoy at 2:47 PM on January 31, 2009

God damn, this is amazing.
posted by spiderskull at 3:13 PM on January 31, 2009

1 and 6 both link to 6.
posted by D.C. at 6:57 AM on January 31 [1 favorite +] [!]

Subtle reference to the Prisoner.
posted by adamrice at 3:18 PM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

#12 was inspired.
posted by flippant at 3:26 PM on January 31, 2009

These were amazing. Absolutely hysterical, particularly #12.
posted by gemmy at 4:12 PM on January 31, 2009

"I think I may sneeze."

Awesome.
posted by A dead Quaker at 5:17 PM on January 31, 2009

I would be negligent not to include this episode.
posted by mccarty.tim at 5:22 PM on January 31, 2009

What's the real episode where Data does all the paintings? How much of the parody was true? Does Picard really act like they're an advance for art, and then Data takes a turn for the wrong (in a non-furry way)?

And WTF re: Data with the knife? Was that edited in?
posted by mccarty.tim at 5:40 PM on January 31, 2009

Data with the knife? Was that edited in?

No. That was from ... er ... Phantasms, I think? Somewhere in season 7?
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 6:02 PM on January 31, 2009

Wow. I am a dork.

(I also went to a They Might Be Giants show last night.)
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 6:04 PM on January 31, 2009

They're like Zen koans for nerds.
posted by Amanojaku at 8:42 PM on January 31, 2009

Is this series ongoing? If not, I really don't know what to look forward to in the future...
posted by mccarty.tim at 9:55 PM on January 31, 2009

Funnier without the beard.
posted by zengargoyle at 10:03 PM on January 31, 2009

#7!
...what, no laughs?

(It's the way you deliver it)
posted by Smedleyman at 10:22 PM on January 31, 2009

mccarty.tim: "What's the real episode where Data does all the paintings?"

I think it was an episode where Data somehow engages some sort of creativity chip, and starts painting images from his "dreams" which end with him dreaming of meeting his creator (Nunian Soong, I think?), who gives him a speech about the power of imagination or something. The rest is totally parody. The crew was interested in his paintings because, whoa, android dreams of electric sheep, but there was no frightening turn. They were all paintings of blacksmithing and birds and stuff, which were supposed to represent some riddle and shit.
posted by team lowkey at 11:11 PM on January 31, 2009 [1 favorite]

I am so happy to be a trek fan right about now. I will be smiling about this for a long time.
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 11:11 PM on January 31, 2009

mccarty.tim: "I would be negligent not to include this episode."

The episode I always wanted to see, written and performed eerily close to how it appears in my dreams.
posted by Science! at 3:22 AM on February 1, 2009 [2 favorites]

Brilliant. Couldn't breathe several times.
posted by The Monkey at 3:29 AM on February 1, 2009

These just made my day, thank you.
posted by Coaticass at 3:55 AM on February 1, 2009

Made of creamy geek-flavour win.
posted by Pallas Athena at 7:00 AM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

@Team Lowkey: Aw, the image of the crew walking in on Data drawing something awful while he obliviously bows was too good to let go. But I guess Braga isn't creative enough for that kind of twist :(

That was sarcastic, please don't start a flame war over whether Braga ultimately hurt or helped Star Trek.
posted by mccarty.tim at 11:04 AM on February 1, 2009

watch #2 before watching #7. Seriously.
posted by xbonesgt at 4:22 PM on February 1, 2009

I don't know the Star Trek universe aside from osmosis through my friends, and I've been showing these to everyone I know. They transcend nerdery (at least of that specific type) and enter a beautiful perfect world all of their own.
posted by Navelgazer at 4:22 PM on February 1, 2009

#14!
posted by EarBucket at 4:43 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

#9 was my favourite I think.
posted by lundman at 5:03 PM on February 1, 2009

Holy shit.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 9:12 PM on February 1, 2009

Those were hilarious, sometimes horrifying, and definitely weird. 10 made me laugh the most, followed by the explosion-laden "last time on Star Trek" sequence on 9.

I had completely forgotten about Data's ill-conceived beard.
posted by O9scar at 9:48 PM on February 1, 2009

Wil Wheaton noticed!
posted by Locative at 5:35 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Heart of Oak.
posted by chunking express at 8:35 AM on February 2, 2009

Oh #9, how I love you so.
posted by quin at 10:07 AM on February 2, 2009

Very well done!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:18 AM on February 2, 2009

Oh thank you for posting this, AV. Youtube drive: engage.
posted by not_on_display at 12:39 PM on February 2, 2009

not_on_display: Oh thank you for posting this, AV. Youtube drive: engage.
I mean loquacious. Whatever your name is. I'm just happy.
posted by not_on_display at 12:40 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Guys!!!!!!! I just found out the mystery behind these.

Here's the main page for them all. Apparently, the guy who does MSPaint Adventures had a hand in it.

Wil Wheaton has a response.
posted by heathkit at 3:05 PM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

I've been trying to single-white-female loquacious for ages. It's working! It's finally working!!! *rolls one, takes off on a skateboard*
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 3:24 PM on February 2, 2009

*does a double-take*

There are two of them?
posted by Pronoiac at 9:56 AM on February 3, 2009

#15 is up! I just watched these again; it's funnier the second time around.
posted by not_on_display at 7:05 PM on February 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

Thanks! My Saturday is now awesome.
posted by chairface at 10:33 AM on February 7, 2009

I am late to this, but loquacious, I love you so much.

I just almost went into cardiac arrest.
posted by symphonik at 8:33 PM on February 21, 2009

And now the same people have dont their take on the Back to the Future series: 1 | 2. (And #16 and #17 are up, and they just.... keep... getting... funnier.)
posted by not_on_display at 8:53 PM on February 23, 2009

#18 ... the NaQed Now, part 2 ... is ... man, that expression just disturbs me.
posted by WCityMike at 11:51 AM on February 25, 2009

This, by the way, will add the guy who makes these videos to your RSS reader.
posted by WCityMike at 11:51 AM on February 25, 2009